Chapter 12 - Heartlamp
Strains of laughter at the doorway drew my attention as Allie and Chez walked through. I couldn’t help but note how relaxed Allie was around Chez. The two of them looked like jolly old friends coming back from an adventure.
My eyebrows furrowed in displeasure. “What took you so long? I said to tour the grounds, not engage in some prolonged bonding activity.”
Allie gave me a suffering look.
“Oh, we found your broken hydraulic sprinkler system,” Chez started.
The Duchess put a hand to her mouth. “I forgot to mention. I hope you didn’t hurt yourself. Those rusty taps and hoses are tangled up all over the place, sunken holes everywhere.”
Chez’s eyes lit up. “Oh, Allie fixed it.”
The Duchess blinked. “What?”
My gaze slid over to Allie.
Allie shrugged. “The gears were just all mucked up from the humidity and I tightened some of the fittings. It should be running right as rain once again, green up all that nice grass you have.”
At her offhand, self-assured response, the Duchess’s eyes narrowed for a moment. Her thin red lips curved into a pleased, somewhat devious smile. “Hmm…” Her gaze went up and down Allie’s figure as if seeing her for the first time. “You look like a drowned kitten, my dear.” She snapped her fingers. “Dry clothes for everyone.”
I jerked in my stance as, with a poof of sparkling mist, even my shirt and pants were dry and clean.
Allie’s shirt was pristine once again, her lab coat freshly pressed, not a stain in sight. She gave the Duchess a pleased smile. “Thank you, Madame Duchess.”
The Duchess gave her a magnanimous smile. “Shall we sit down to supper?”
With great enthusiasm, Allie plonked herself into a chair. Chez hopped to curl up on a little table beside the Duchess’s chair with a little saucer of green soup set out on it.
“This looks wonderful.” Allie served herself a bowl of the same green soup.
The Duchess’s smile didn’t waver. “We’ve got some lovely mock turtle soup today. Made from fresh mock turtles.”
At that notion, Allie tilted her head and couldn’t help her remark, “Fascinating.” She dipped the spoon in the soup and let it drip back into the bowl a few times, watching it closely as though studying its consistency, before she tasted a mouthful with no apprehension whatsoever.
“How is it, dear?” the Duchess prompted.
Allie pursed her lips. I supposed she figured honesty was going to be the best tack. “It tastes like waffles.” Then she paused as though not willing to give offense. “Tasty though.”
Standing by the liquor trolley, I rolled my eyes and poured myself another drink.
Chez was licking his own lips. “Too much pepper.”
Allie’s smile widened with amusement. Her gaze fell on the plate nearest to me, the one with the tomatoes sorted out. “Are you eating that?”
“No.” I pushed the plate away. “Look, can we finish up this meal so we can get to business? The Duchess will need some time to craft you a Heartlamp and then you should get your memories back.”
The Duchess’s mouth dropped open in mild surprise. “Oh, I’m sorry, Rabb. I think you misunderstood. I’m afraid I actually won’t be able to do that.”
“What?” Frowning in displeasure, I leaned against the table. “Is this because I won’t give you what you want? Look, Duchess, I already told you. Without the Queen’s command, I cannot—”
“Ah, but that is precisely the problem.” The Duchess put her hand up. “I do have some Heartlamp pieces crafted and ready. But without one last ingredient which only the Queen can provide, my lamps will just be regular lamps. They won’t hold even the faintest of Heartfire embers.”
“What?” I stopped, stunned in almost outraged disbelief. I met Allie’s gaze. I’d half-expected her to be just as outraged but her forehead was merely creased in concern.
Checking my fury, I turned to glare at Chez. “You didn’t tell me it was pointless to come here without the missing ingredient from the Queen.”
Chez merely licked his paws. “What? I don’t know everything.” He winked at Allie then disappeared into thin air.
“So this whole trip was a waste.” Impatient, I whirled around and paced across the floor. “Why did we even bother coming all this way?”
The Duchess lamented with a heavy sigh. “I wanted to see my Rabb one last time before I died.”
“For the last time, Duchess, you’re not going to die.” I had to roll my eyes. “You want to know why? Because I’m not gonna kill you. No matter how much you beg.”
“Wait.” Allie was deep in thought, gears in her mind spinning. I could practically see the steam almost coming out of her ears. “So what you’re saying is we need something from the Queen to make this Heartlamp work its magic?”
“Yes.” The Duchess nodded.
Allie pointed between the Duchess and me. “And neither of you have enough magic mumbo jumbo to make it work on your own?”
“Tis true.” The Duchess nodded again. “Short of dropping in on the castle and stealing the essence of hearts, there’s no other way to activate a Heartlamp.”
Allie’s eyes narrowed in that way and I knew she was scheming something once again. “Well, why don’t we? Go and steal this…essence, I mean.” She shrugged. “The Queen steals people’s hearts. She should get a dose of her own medicine.”
“Why?” the Duchess echoed in mocking. “Because my dear the Queen would cut off your head sooner than you could hopscotch away. She is the most powerful being in Wünder.”
Allie shot me a look. “More powerful than Rabb?”
There was an undefined twinge in my chest at her words, which if I dared overthink felt gratifyingly like pride.
“I thought he was the most powerful sorcerer in Wünder?”
Quashing the burgeoning warmth in my chest, I dropped my gaze. I was already aware the whole point was moot.
“The Queen’s powers have no match,” the Duchess stated ruefully. “Our magic, Rabb’s and mine…could never be used against her.”
“She’s not wrong.” A telltale silhouette of a yellow grin hovered in mid-air above Allie’s shoulder, close to her face—perhaps a little too close.
Allie nearly jumped out of her skin. “Cripe!” She clutched her hand to her chest. “Chez! Can you please stop randomly appearing out of nowhere like that? You scared the brain cells out of me!”
Chez plopped onto the table with another grin. “Sorry.”
Blowing out a breath, Allie put a finger on her chin. “So, okay…if this Heartlamp is built like a regular lamp, do we need the Duchess to build it or could we possibly take the pieces away and assemble it later?”
“A fair question.” The Duchess gave Allie a scrutinizing look. “She looks handy with tools. I bet you can figure out how to make it yourself. Can’t you, strange girl?”
“I can build anything,” Allie declared. “So we know what it is though? This item we need from the Queen? Perhaps it’s possible to acquire it somewhere else?”
The Duchess shook her head. “I am afraid, my dear, this is something unique to the Queen. There will be no other way to produce it without her hand.”
“Nuts,” Allie mumbled.
The Duchess’s eyes lit up. “Unless perhaps you could try summoning a rainbow?”
I gave the Duchess a deadpan look. “Already fought a rainbow on the way here. I don’t think we want to risk another encounter with that type of beast.”
A look of surprise crossed the Duchess’s face. “You didn’t get what you desired from the rainbow?”
Allie cringed. “The rainbow had a pretty odd interpretation of what I desired.”
A corner of my mouth turned up against my will. “Allie keeps insisting that she doesn’t care about my well-being whilst managing to conjure a healing burlap for my injuries from the rainbow beast.”
Shaking her head, Allie hissed. “You’re still ridiculous.”
The Duchess gaped at Allie, her eyes widening even more than before, as though something new had struck her. Naturally, it hadn’t occurred to her that Allie would be any different. “Wait a minute. Are you…” She pointed a manicured finger at Allie but then slid her gaze over to me. “She’s…not enamored by you?”
I cleared my throat but Allie answered before I could.
“No, she is not,” Allie confirmed, her tone pointed. “But you should have seen these women on this boat,” she went on with a mocking chuckle. “And all these other women he brings home at night. Have they never even seen a man before,” she scoffed, “carrying on as though Rabb was the only remotely attractive one around?”
But the Duchess nodded. “Ah, ‘tis true! It’s his gift. And his curse. Rabb has stolen the hearts of many a female here in Wünder. There isn’t a woman around that once Rabb sets his eyes upon, he cannot make fall in love with him, bend to his will, and make his own. Mind, body, heart, and soul. And once they are under his spell, it’s that much easier to extract their mystical hearts and deliver to the Queen.”
“Whaaaat?” Allie whined in a high-pitched tone. “That’s ridiculous. You’re saying he can make anyone fall in love with him?”
I flashed her a self-assured I-told-you-so smirk. “One look and they are mine.”
Allie pointed at herself. “Except me?”
I huffed. “You are not an exception. I told you. You are already mine. Your life belongs to me.”
“Nooo.” Still in incredulous disbelief, Allie’s nose was scrunched up, her fingers spread in question. “That is just—come on, all of them? I mean, what do they even see in him?”
The Duchess looked perplexed. “He’s…gorgeous and powerful.” Her expression overwhelmed with concern. “Oh dear, I think perhaps this girl is blind. She must be suffering from a malady worse than memory loss.” Leaning forward, she waved her hands in Allie’s face. “Her perception seems to be askew.”
Weaving back, Allie folded her arms across her chest. “There is nothing wrong with my perception. I just…don’t understand.” She seemed to ruminate on it further. “Though I suppose the evidence does seem to support this. It’s a wonder Wünder isn’t crawling with all your fluffy, little bunny babies given your rather frequent mating habits.”
Hissing in annoyance, I gritted my teeth. “Shut up,” I snapped before glaring at Chez again. “Dammit Chez. Did you really have to tell Allie about that?”
“I’m sorry.” Chez snickered, looking in no way apologetic.
“Oh darling, does she know your animal form?” The Duchess looked amused.
“Chez told me.” Allie’s eager eyes turned to her. “Have you seen it?”
The Duchess nodded. “Oh, yes, it was quite cute.”
The three of them laughed.
My glare as dark as I could make it, I merely shook my head. I didn’t want to give them the satisfaction of blowing up. “Yes, let’s just all have a laugh, shall we?” I drawled, my tone dripping with sarcasm. “And after this highly productive visit, we now have the problem of how to get back to our side of the river.”
Stopping short, Allie made a face. “Oh right, we probably can’t go back on the Caucus.”
Chez’s forehead was creased. “What sort of trouble did you cause on the boat this time? Did you get caught fooling around under the roulette tables again?”
“Doesn’t matter,” I dismissed curtly. “Either way, I am not getting back on that river so we’ll have to find some other way.”
“Ah! I know of a tree hollow,” the Duchess spoke up. “’Tis the only one of its kind which you can use to cross the River of Tears.”
Allie’s eyes lit up. “Really?”
“Yes. However, there is only one way to get to it.” The Duchess’s tone was already wary.
My face fell. “No.”
Allie looked from her to me. “What?”
“It’s on the Hatter’s property,” the Duchess relayed with a helpless shrug. “And he’s…not all there.” She gestured a loopy motion with her hand, screwing up her face on purpose.
That made Chez roll over in stitches.
I hissed in displeasure. This trip was just getting better and better.
Even though the Hatter was technically a man, in my opinion, he was worse than the Jabberwocky and the rainbow beast combined.
“Perhaps he can still be reasoned with?” Allie proposed.
“Perhaps.” The Duchess gave a wave. “Regardless, I think you ought to rest here a while before you continue on your journey. The overnight tides will be coming soon.” She raised one hand to summon servants to lead us to our rooms.
“I’d like to stay and have a chat if you don’t mind.” Allie gave the Duchess an imploring nod.
“Excellent.” The Duchess’s eyes lit up. “More tea, please.” She gave another wave to a butler standing by.
I sighed. I was absolutely not here on a social visit. Shrugging, I moved to take my leave and headed upstairs. “Suit yourselves.”