Chapter 13 - Curiouser
After having washed up from supper, instead of resting, I stalked out of my quarters once again.
I couldn’t sit still. My mind was too busy. Despite it being unlikely that we were in any danger, I was impatient for my magic to renew. I disliked feeling this powerless.
I was relieved the tinkling of teacups and general merriment from downstairs had already dissipated.
Chez was in a hammock hung along the upstairs balcony with his ball of yarn. He looked up as I walked past. “The Duchess has retired for the evening,”
“I didn’t ask.” Wrinkling my nose, I fussed with the itching on my shoulder wound. With my magic strained, I hadn’t bothered to tend to it at all.
Flopping around on his belly, Chez watched me with big, violet eyes. “Curious,” he started. “Back there, at the rainbow? What was that? When Allie got hurt, you…”
I dropped my gaze. “I got hurt too.”
Chez’s eyes seemed to widen at the enormity of the conclusion my statement implied. “You mean if you hadn’t saved her just then—”
“She would be dead,” I said flatly. “Meaning, I would be dead. That woman will quite literally be the death of me.”
Chez shook his head. “Sheesh! Because you carry her heart? Does she know that?”
“And let her know she has that much control over me? Not a chance.” I ran my fingers through my hair in frustration. “She is my biggest weakness now. If she gets killed, I will die. I need to protect that damn girl. Assuming I don’t fight off the urge to kill her myself first.”
Chez whistled. “Your enemies will have a field day.”
“That’s why they’re not going to find out.” I gave him a dark glare. “If word spreads, I’ll know it’s you and I will cut off your head. Body or no body.”
Chez put up his paws as if in defeat. “Mum’s the word, my friend.”
I was going to turn and leave but I stopped first. “Chez.”
“Yes?” He was preoccupied with his ball of yarn.
“Are we really friends?”
The yarn ball fell and bounced low on the floor.
Chez’s gaze met mine. He didn’t seem to be quite sure what to make of me. But he narrowed his solemn gaze and nodded noncommittally. “If you like.”
I merely grunted in response before walking away.
Across the grand staircase and to the left of the hall, I was going to walk past Allie’s suite but stopped short at the open doorway.
Allie sat on one end of the plush fabric day couch with a bottle of antiseptic and a pile of clean bandages beside her. The Duchess had provided them to replace the ‘atrocious scraps of cloth’ we had used to bind her wounds.
I didn’t have enough magic to heal her injuries either. But I wasn’t much inclined to ask the Duchess for any more favors, in case she asked another one of me—the nature of which I already knew I wouldn’t be able to grant.
Her lab coat was draped over the armrest. Her sleeves folded up, Allie muttered as she struggled to apply the medicine to her injuries, cursing every so often.
Already shaking my head, I marched over to take the bandages out of her hands.
“I can do it myself.” Allie shrugged me off, but her frustration was obvious as she attempted to re-dress her shoulder wound.
She was so bloody stubborn.
Exasperated myself, I brushed her hand aside and gripped her other arm. “I know you can,” I said, my tone firm as I sat down beside her. “But let me.”
Surprised, those honey-brown eyes gazed up at me, half in suspicion, half in…wonder. She stopped her protest and let me tend to her wound. The bleeding had stopped but it would still need a bit of my magic to heal it completely tomorrow.
I quickly checked her aura. Despite her injuries, she was relatively unharmed. But as I worked, I could sense a certain level of confusion in Allie.
She wasn’t sure what to make of me right then either. She definitely wasn’t pleased about our failed quest. She was conflicted about being here. A deep wanting of home burned inside her, but it was marred by frustration since she couldn’t remember anything about it.
Having never had to process feelings before, everything only felt jumbled to me. Much noise without a thread of melody. A cacophony of notions without a shred of sense. I shook off the connection.
“It’s done.” I turned to put the leftover bandages away.
The neckline on my shirt pulled at my skin as it was tugged to one side with Allie peering closer.
I recoiled. “What the hell are you doing?”
She gave me a pointed look. “Your shoulder injury also needs looking at. Take off your shirt.”
Shrugging her hand off, I dismissed it. “Leave it. I’ll fix it tomorrow with a spell once my magic recovers.”
Allie made a face. “It looks horrible. Come on. I’m a doctor, remember?”
“You said you’re not thatkind of doctor,” I reminded her.
She pursed her lips in insistence. “At least let me put the healing balm from the Duchess on it.” She leaned forward to inspect my shoulder and I stiffened in my seat.
With excruciatingly slow movements, Allie reached into my shirt from the opening at the neck to apply the balm against my stab wound. Luckily, I had already cleaned it up. I was sure it looked more gruesome earlier.
I glared at the top of her head, of half a mind to push her off and away.
Her hair smelled like…like… I wrinkled my nose as the realization struck me. The flowers… That intoxicating scent was coming from Allie’s hair.
Dammit. I should get up.
“I should go sit somewhere else,” I grumbled but I couldn’t make my body move away. Allie was warm, soft… Her mere presence seemed to quiet much of the conflicted rage in my head. I was tempted to sink into the couch beside her but my back remained stiff. “This is…odd.”
Allie groaned. “What is the big deal? Stop being such a big baby.” To support herself, her other hand was propped firm on my other shoulder. Her small hand pressed warm through the fabric of my shirt and sent shivers up my spine.
The way she was leaning over me was bringing her face quite close to mine. I only needed to lift my hand and I could plunge my fingers through that thick mass of silken hair and grasp the nape of her neck to pull her in and take that mouth—
Rolling my eyes in annoyance at my own ridiculous notions, I averted my gaze to look out the window.
A small flock of birds squawked as they flapped across the lagoon behind the Duchess’s house. The moon’s reflection was full and round among the lilies floating in the still water. Crickets chirped in the humid air. Fireflies dotted the dark gardens.
A snort of laughter escaping Allie startled me from my reverie.
I gave her a wary look. “What?”
“Nothing.” She bit her lip. “The uh…Duchess was telling stories about your dalliances back in the day. The story with the pineapple in particular was quite amusing. She refers to your…gift,” she ventured the word, “as something kind of big, powerful, and dangerous.”
I huffed. “If it worked on you, I wouldn’t have to bother explaining it.”
Allie rolled her eyes. “It’s just that it’s all so superficial.”
I shrugged. “Either way, it works. That’s all I care about. It’s my job.”
She paused from her task. “So, how do you do it? You know, seduce all of those women,” she prompted. “Is it a spell?”
I shot her a look.
For the briefest of moments, I thought her gaze dropped to my mouth. “I’m curious.”
“Sometimes…” I mumbled. “Sometimes I cast a spell. Sometimes I just look into their eyes. Sometimes it takes a kiss…” I couldn’t help my own gaze dropping to her mouth.
Tamping down an irrational urge to move closer, I took a slow, deep breath. “But as we’ve already established, for some reason, the spell doesn’t work on you, so there’s no way you would understand.”
Her eyebrow rose. “So you’ve actually cast this spell on me before and it didn’t work?”
Meeting her gaze once again, I gave her a pointed, mocking look. “Are you in love with me yet?”
Those red lips quirked up in amusement. “No…” A wistful faraway look crossed her face, hinting at remorse, even embarrassment. “I don’t fully remember but…I feel like it’s always been like that with me though. I don’t think I’ll ever truly give my heart to anybody.”
A gratifying spark of satisfaction, of self-assuredness warmed my chest. I studied the curve of her smooth cheek, that graceful neck, the way her hair tumbled over her shoulders. “But…I stole your heart. Doesn’t that make it mine?”
Those honey-brown eyes snapped over to meet my languid prompting gaze in surprise. She scoffed in mocking to recover, taking my statement as if it was a joke. “Yeah. Right.”
Turning her attention back to treating my wound, she cleared her throat. “So do you miss your clock tower? This whole swamp is a bit dreary, isn’t it?”
My skin prickled under her butterfly touch. She was stroking the balm in circles to even it out, wary not to press too hard on my injury. Slightly disoriented, I grunted noncommittally.
“Chez said you hadn’t been across the river in a long while,” she went on, not waiting to hear my responses to her questions. “I don’t know. It felt more normal to me there. Without the magic.”
Almost offended again, I narrowed my eyes. “What sort of mad world do you come from anyway? There’s no magic at all? None whatsoever?”
“Well, nothing like what I’ve seen you do, that’s for sure. But I suppose there are other kinds of magic in my world.”
“Like what?”
Her eyes clouded over. “I can’t…explain it right now. But I feel like…there is.” She paused to give her head a brisk shake as if to clear it. “There.” Finishing up with my wound, she moved to sit back on the couch. With a deep sigh, she leaned her head against my uninjured shoulder, shifting her head near the hollow of my neck, likely involuntarily.
I could imagine she was exhausted from the day’s events and injuries certainly didn’t help fatigue.
My shoulder was getting stiff from the awkward angle of her leaning against me. I sighed in resignation and put my arm around her shoulders. “You need to rest.”
Somehow she melted against me. “It’s already a struggle to fall asleep without the ticking of the big clock. I guess I’d gotten used to it. It’s…soothing, I guess.” A faint wave of calm was slowly working its way through her aura. A relief. A settledness. She blinked as though trying to keep awake but her eyelids were drooping. “Your world is indeed amazing. I wonder what it was like before… before all this… before you lost your…”
Her mumbling turned incoherent and then she passed out.
I shook my head. I could barely remember the days when I didn’t have to put up with an annoying helpless trouble-seeking female mortal. She didn’t even realize how lucky she was. In her helpless state, without me to protect her, she would have been completely vulnerable.
Once she was quietly snoring, I set Allie down across the couch properly before straightening up. Her hand was resting slack on her chest, where her heart ought to be. The moonlight shone on her messy hair that had fallen partway across her forehead.
Checking the urge to find a blanket to cover her with, I spun around to leave.
I still needed to do some meditation to regenerate my magic with the overnight tides, and I couldn’t do that with her around to distract me.
It seemed instead of indulging in her usual lengthy morning breakfast feast, the Duchess wanted to personally see us off. By the time I came out of my suite, she was at the front porch, Allie’s hand clasped in hers.
Tilting my head to peer at them out the big windows, I slid my hand along the staircase railing as I descended.
Energetic from being once again completely healed from her injuries, Allie ventured her last-minute questions—respectful and curious. “Madame Duchess, if you wouldn’t mind my asking…”
The Duchess interjected right away, “Why do I want to die?” She let out an airy laugh. “Darling, I have lived a long, long, long life.” Her face paled, her skin wrinkling, her entire aura dimmed as she spoke, “My sole purpose has always been to serve the Queen of Hearts. I only move when she says. I only breathe when she says. Such a life is not worth living.”
“I see.” Allie nodded, her forehead creased in deep thought. “That’s…quite interesting.”
“Interesting because Rabb has the same purpose and yet, he doesn’t feel as I do?” the Duchess prompted.
“Exactly.”
Chez popped up and moseyed over to lie out on the porch steps to sun himself.
Glancing at the cat, the Duchess’s smile was wan. “Rabb is…a little bit younger than I. And while his emotions have been all but stripped away, I still have a small piece of my Heartfire ember. It seems that to be able to do what I do for the Queen, I must have a certain measure of emotions.” She tapped her chest. “I feel sadness. I feel grief. I feel loneliness. I feel guilt. When you get to be as old as I am, all alone, carrying this burden, I imagine you would wish for the end to come swiftly as well.”
At her admission, a twinge in my own chest stung for a moment. I supposed some people would find that between the two of us, the Duchess had the worst deal of it. I was almost certain that Allie would think so too.
Allie’s frown deepened. “I am so sorry.”
“Ah, it is not for you to be sorry about. This is simply the way things are.” The Duchess waved it away. A sparkling mist surrounded her hand for a moment until the mist formed into a crystal hand mirror. “Here.” She handed Allie the gilded hand mirror.
“What is this?”
“A looking glass.”
Allie turned over the delicate glittering accessory in her hand. “Yes, but what is it for?”
“This looking glass will allow us to communicate across the river,” the Duchess said, her gaze turning wistful and faraway. “I think I shall miss my new friend. It has been such a long time since I’ve had quite intriguing company.”
Coming out of the French doors, I gave the Duchess an acknowledging nod then held my hand out to take the looking glass from Allie so I could shrink it and keep it in my pocket.
The Duchess clucked her tongue. “Even though it may otherwise seem as though you’ve made this trip for nothing.”
“Not at all.” Allie shook her head. “It was very lovely to meet you, Madame Duchess.”
“I am sorry I couldn’t be of more help.” The Duchess’s smile quirked a bit as she regarded Allie with a look. “But perhaps I could make you an offer instead. What would you say to your coming to stay here at my estate?”
Allie’s mouth dropped open. “What?”
Surprised, I jerked in my stance. On the one hand, I almost sighed in instant relief at the prospect of being unburdened of Allie’s infuriating company. But then suspicion struck me.
Was the Duchess trying to hold Allie hostage to coerce me into ending her life? Had the Duchess become aware of Allie’s true nature? Was the Duchess trying to take advantage and extract the coeur for herself? Did Chez tell the Duchess what she was?
I cast a glance over at Chez but he merely rolled over with a soft purr, not even paying the rest of us any mind.
The Duchess went on. “This big house is too quiet all by my lonesome. And perhaps with your company, I might think of wanting to die less. Plus, you might even get to fixing the cooktop and the steam baths.” She peered at Allie’s face with a solemn entreat. “If you find your home is much out of reach, I fancy you might have a place here.”
Almost startling Allie, I stepped in front of her before the words of offer even settled. “Out of the question, Duchess.” I glared at her. “I told you she is mine.”
The Duchess raised her hand to her throat. “Ah, my dear Rabb, I stake no claim on her. I was just perhaps thinking that it would be easier on you if she wasn’t around. You know I would protect her with all the magic I have.” She peered around me to meet Allie’s gaze again to promise. “I swear it. You would be safe here.”
I didn’t glance back to check for Allie’s reaction.
The Duchess’s trustworthy eyes and earnest nod indeed rang sincere but the tightness in my chest warred with my sudden headache. It was taxing to think through the reason why but I already knew my answer. I couldn’t let the Duchess control my weakness. “No. She’ll come back with me and I’ll hear nothing more about it.”
Eyebrow raising half in amusement, the Duchess pursed her lips. “Whatever you say, Rabb.”