Chapter 15
Chapter Fifteen
HARRY
M a fusses over Lou in the old ranch kitchen. They are busy unpacking boxes, working out where they want things to go. I like seeing them together. They are like two peas in a pod. Does somethin’ to my insides watching them.
“Where do you want your big pots, Rosie?” Louisa asks, pulling two from a deep box.
“Oh, hon, under the sink, you think?” Ma studies the bare-bones kitchen, hands on her hips. Louisa bends, placing the pots where instructed, and takes her next order. I’ve never seen my mother so animated. So determined. It’s good. It’s better.
“Harry, could you grab the last few boxes from the truck?” Ma tosses over her shoulder, arms deep in a box herself.
“Sure.” I unstack the chairs and set them around the old hardwood dining table on the other side of the large kitchen dining area, on the hearth side. I slide the captain’s chair in at the head of the table. “Lou, give us a hand?”
“Yeah, gimme a sec.” She finishes sorting cutlery into a drawer and rounds the counter. Ma smiles at us as we cross the threshold onto the porch.
Lou glances back. “It’s so great to see her happy, Harry.”
“Sure is.”
We walk to the buckboard parked under the closest old tree. When we’re out of sight, I crowd her against it.
She huffs a breathy laugh and slides her arms around my neck. “I’m glad you’re happy, too.”
“Got everything a man needs. Hard work, sunshine... woman.”
My gaze drops to her mouth as it curls into a sweet smile. I dip down to claim her lips as mine, but a fine finger halts my progress. I look up at lit green eyes.
“I’m not moving in with you, mister,” Lou rasps, then offers up a sad smile.
“But you are part owner...” I lean back, still wrapped around her.
She chuckles. “That is not why I helped you at the auction. Besides, Mama Mancini needs me. And I don’t—” She rubs a thumb over my jaw. “I need my own place for a while. To ground myself. You know what I mean?”
I nod.
But the lump in my throat renders me speechless. I want her everywhere. I want her beside me on this ranch. I want to build a life with Louisa. And if it was up to me, there’d be no waitin’.
“This is not me running, I promise. Okay? And we can see each other every day, like we do now. I need to make something for myself, too.”
Her eyes are pleading.
How can I say no?
How selfish have I been, thinkin’ of only what I want?
Hell, it’s the reason she ran in the first place. I never once asked her what she wanted—I assumed. Like I did with the ranch offer. I’m a goddamn fool.
“If that’s what you need, darlin’, I’ll give it to you and anything else.”
Her worried face tips up with a glimmer of happiness. And she sends her hands through my hair before pulling my mouth to hers. I sink into her like it’s a place I never wanna leave.
She opens, and I take it all.
A small voice clears a short distance away.
Louisa pushes back.
I hold her steady, turning around. “Jesus, Ma.”
“I thought you must have gotten lost, or have those boxes been long forgotten?” She smiles, her eyebrows raised. The mirth covering her face is priceless. Lou’s face reddens as if caught with her hand in the cookie jar.
“Sorry, Rosie,” Louisa says, manhandling a box from the buckboard and into her arms. I follow suit and walk the last box into the house. Ma stays out in the yard, staring up into the trees. The old branches are gnarled and twisted like they have weathered one too many storms. From the kitchen counter, I watch as she talks to herself, sending whatever prayer she’s sayin’ up into the great canopy of the tree.
When she returns to the kitchen, her face is sad.
“Talkin’ to the trees now, hey?” I say, opening the box to find linens wrapped around her most precious porcelain china. She pats my shoulder before diving her hands into the box to retrieve her most worldly possessions. “My son, Mother Nature is always listening. I’m simply askin’ a favor.”
“Sure, Ma.”
I don’t ask what the favor is. Hell, probably best if I don’t. It’s not like we’re churchgoing folk. Never have been. But I’m sure she believes there’s something out there bigger than just us. I hope she’s right.
Louisa’s words float back past my mind. Not moving in with you, Harry. I’m a little disappointed she won’t be here from day one. But mostly, I’m annoyed at myself for assuming what she wanted. For not even bothering to ask.
I make a mental note to correct that as soon as I have the chance.
The sound of eighteen wheels braking shatters the comfortable silence we have been toiling away in. Damn, I almost forgot the cattle are coming today. What’s a ranch without a herd?
“That’s my cue, ladies. Lou, can you give me hand in an hour?”
Louisa looks up from the floor where she sits arranging baking dishes and trays. “Course, where do you need me?”
I can’t help the smile blooming with her words.
“Yards behind the barn, say, forty minutes? Horse will be waitin’.”
“Harrison John Rawlins, you ought to give the poor girl a name. You owe her as much.” Ma’s always had a soft spot for the mare.
“Horse and I will be ready in forty,” Louisa says, standing as she dusts her hands on her jeans. I grab my hat from the hook by the front door and shove it on. With a quick dip of my brim to the best women on God’s green earth, I shoot out the door and head for the yards.
The semi pulls in and starts its reverse for the loading ramp. The dusty brakes squeal as the tail of the cattle crate hits the wooden posts precariously holding up the fallin’ down ramp. Its rails bow as the semi rolls forward a little, and the driver hits the brake.
Two decks is all it took for my herd at the allotments to be transported to the ranch. And now that they are here, I realize this number of head is nowhere near enough.
“Mornin’.” The semi driver comes up beside me as I look over the cattle milling in the crate. He leans on the side, plucking out a paper and a wad of tobacco. He rolls it as he glances at the old yards. “These old railin’s seen better days. Name’s Ned.” He extends a hand. He’s not much older than me. I shake his firm grip and turn to the yards.
“Same everywhere on this old place. Everything needs fixin’.”
He laughs. “Good thing you came along, hey?”
He slaps me on the back.
“Yeah,” I say with a chuckle and slide the rear crate gate open, pinning it back. Ned climbs up the side of the crate, opening another interior gate. My cattle—heifers, steers, and a few old cows—wobble their way down the dusty ramp. I swear the only thing still holding it up is the dirt inside it.
When the last beast is off the trailer safely, Ned files in, shutting the gate behind them. I crawl through the rail and walk through the herd, checking them over. He climbs onto the top rail of the yard. His ripped jeans and holey shirt match his tattered hat. He chews on a stalk of grass, the smoke long gone.
“Not too bad for a starter herd. But this big old place is gonna need more to earn its keep, Harry.”
Harry . Like we’re friends.
“Yeah, I’m seeing that.”
“You’ll find bigger lots of breeders over in Great Falls. Sales are every Wednesday.” He spits the stalk of grass to the ground.
“Right.” I make my way back to where he sits and lean on the closest upright post.
“You need someone to show you around the chaos, let me know. The auctioneers have favorites. But, hey, you managed to snag this place. So you should have no problem.”
“Yeah, well.”
As if it’s her cue, Louisa, Horse, and my gelding clip-clop over to where we are.
Ned pulls his hat off immediately, sitting up straighter before jumping down from the railing. “Howdy, miss.”
“Hi,” Lou says. A strange look twists her face as her gaze finds me. Horse stops behind her, nudging her shoulder, alongside the gelding. “Ready, Harry?”
“I should get on with it, then,” Ned says, looking between us. Louisa’s attention hasn’t left my face.
“Yeah, thanks, bud.”
The semi growls back to life and pulls from the loading ramp. Louisa’s eyes widen as the end posts sway. “Wow, that needs some love.”
I chuckle. “This whole place does.”
“Luckily, she has the best rancher I know.” She winks at me and pecks a kiss to my cheek. The semi clears the ranch entrance, turning wide onto the dirt road.
“Ma okay?”
“Yep, lyin’ down for a rest. So, the afternoon is ours.” She rests a hand onto my chest but nods behind me. “And theirs.”
It’s the first time on a horse on the ranch. It’s surreal. I worked so long for this. Now, it’s happening, and I feel nervous, sure, and behind already all at the same time.
“Saddle up, cowboy; let’s move some cows.”
She hands me the gelding’s reins and swings onto Horse before lookin’ down at me. Eyes full of excitement and wonder, Louisa trots for the gate. I swing into the saddle and follow. She leans down, opening the gate, and we walk through. Taking the gate from her hand, I throw it shut. The mechanism rattles but takes, holding it closed.
“Where are we takin’ them?” Lou calls out from the other side of the yard.
“South pasture. It’s the only one that’s still fenced.”
Louisa howls a laugh. “Oh, Harry. It’s too much.”
I chuckle as I open the gate leading to the pasture. I take the lead and walk through, hoping the herd remembers their routine, even in a new environment. Sweet little hup-hups sweep over the cattle. I turn in the saddle to find Lou waving and trotting back and forth behind them, moving them out of the yard.
She’s a goddamn natural, this woman.
An hour later, I round the herd and trot to the back. The grass is thick, lush, and evergreen. The mountains are a few miles away, leaving the pasture in its shadow. The perfect spot, accentuated by the odd copse of trees dotted throughout the large holding paddock. A deep stream runs along the perimeter of the pasture as if a border between the flat and the mountain.
Louisa’s skin is flushed with the midday sun. The old hat of mine on her head has my insides doin’ a jive. Her blonde hair sways over her shoulders with every long stride Horse takes.
“Fancy coolin’ off?” I ask, nodding to the stream.
“Shouldn’t we head back?” She lifts the hat, wiping away sweat from her brow.
“Or we could take a swim in the stream? Be a shame to ride all this way out here only to turn around again.”
She trots over to where I sit on the gelding, leaning forward, both hands on the pommel.
“Harry Rawlins, are you trying your luck?”
How does this woman read my damn mind like a book?
“Yes, ma’am.”
She chuckles. “Well, okay, then.” But to my surprise, she bursts Horse into a lope, heading for the stream. I send the gelding after her at a gallop. Her hand holds the hat on her head. I race up beside her. The smile that splits her face will keep my memory happy for the rest of my life.
Lou pulls Horse to a halt and swings out of the saddle before I can pull the gelding up. But she stops at the water’s edge. Breathless, she turns back as I swing out of the saddle. But the mirth in her eyes moments ago now turns into something much, much deeper.
I pad to where she stands and pull my hat from my head, letting it fall onto the grass. I slide hers off, and it joins mine a heartbeat before I crash my mouth to hers. Her hands wind around my neck, traveling up into my hair. Her lips are soft, velvety. Her body molds to me. Her scent winds through my senses, my body ignites, sending my cock rock-hard. I grip her face, tracing the seam of her lips. She opens, and I dive right in.
Her elegant features are incredible under my fingertips. I trace one hand down her neck, eliciting a whimper. I swallow it whole and let my hand wander to her collarbone. Louisa’s hands tighten in my hair.
I come up for air.
“Dammit, Lou, I’m burnin’ up here.”
Her eyes are strung out, her breathing choppy and fast. Her fingers tremble as they leave my hair and trail down my neck, over my pecs, and back up to my jaw.
“You have me in cinders, Harry Rawlins.” The words are choked out, like those choppy breaths are more hindrance than help.
“What can I do to ease the burn, darlin’?”
“Touch me, everywhere.”
Lightning, consuming every inch of me, implodes. I grab her, tugging her onto my hips, and walk into the water. I don’t care that my boots are wet. My jeans are soaked, then my shirt. Leavin’ any logic I might’ve had on the shore line, I walk until we are ribs deep in the water. Louisa wraps her legs around my waist and leans back in the cool water, arms out like a goddamn snow angel.
The soaked shirt is transparent now, clinging to her perfect curves. The angles of her throat, the soft pulse of her neck, the jut of her elegant jaw. My breaths burn, and now I feel it. More than before. That invisible tug between the two of us which sprang to life the day I laid eyes on this girl.
This woman.
That day at the diner. For a moment, back then, I thought she was a mirage. One of my many dreams of the only woman I ever wanted.
Now, right in front of me, she waves her arms over the water’s surface, her hair fanning out behind her. The rise and fall of her breath wrenches mine so tight I can barely draw air.
“Lou,” I rasp.
Her arms still. She lifts her body off the water, arms sliding around my neck. Water runs down her slicked hair. Droplets hang from her nose and eyelashes. She’s never looked so beautiful.
So edible.
“Yes?”
My heart stutters. I can’t form the words I was sure I needed to say before. I’m hungry for her. A man’s never been so desperate. I send kisses over her neck. She leans into me, a whimper passing through her lips.
“Take it off, please. Harry.”
I growl, nipping the flesh where her neck hollows out before her collarbone. Her hips wriggle around my waist. “Off, please.”
I pluck the buttons of her shirt loose, one after the other. When the shirt is peeled away, I toss it onto the shoreline.
Louisa’s greens meet my blues, her hands disappearing behind her back. Her bra disappears under the water as she tugs it from her shoulders and her hand rises from the water, the lacy offering in her upturned palm. “Yours.”
A cheeky smile blooms over her face.
I rest my forehead on hers, taking the lacy piece from her hand and tossing it aside. I close my eyes and try to steady my breathing. The Louisa in my dreams is nothing compared to the woman in front of me.
Fine hands grip my jaw, and her lips brush mine. “If we start this, I don’t think I can stop.”
“Darlin’, it never ended for me.”
Something like worry claims her face. “No, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t?—”
“It’s done. We’re movin’ forward.”
“But—”
“Kiss me, Louisa May.”
“Har—”
“I ain’t askin, darlin’.”
An incredulous laugh slips past her lips, and she brushes her nose past my own, lips nipping my top lip. I capture her bottom one with my teeth. Her breath hitches.
“Everywhere, Harry.”
“Sweet Jesus, woman. You’re expectin’ a lot of a man.” I shake my head, feigning seriousness.
She slaps my chest and chuckles, but it dies out when my gaze holds hers.
“How about I show you all the places I found in my dreams when you weren’t here...” I lower my head and run kisses over the tops of her breasts. She arches into my touch. Her hands grip the opening of my work shirt, pushing those perfect fuckin’ tits into my face. A growl rumbles through my throat. I pluck a hard, pert nipple up with my teeth.
“Har—” The little cry following her halfhearted attempt at my name sends lava coiling through my veins. My cock throbs with the need for her. One arm around her hip, I let the other trail for the button of her jeans.
“Harry, please, out of the water. I want to see you. Touch you. I can’t here.”
“Hold on.” I stalk toward the shoreline, droplets cascading from her perfect naked form as I rise from the water. She studies my face as we cross the pebbled threshold out of the water.
I lay her on the thick, swaying grasses. Kneeling between her legs, it hits me how much I’ve needed her. And how much I have to make up for.