Chapter 7
Chapter Seven
Giovanna
‘ Y our nonno is waiting.’ Paulo spoke again, shattering through my ridiculous dream and making me wonder if I’d completely misheard and misinterpreted the previous minute or two. But, not moving, I closed my eyes briefly and opened them again to find him still looking at me absorbedly, until I could do no more than to reciprocate and search deep inside his, where I discerned that I hadn’t been mistaken at all. The player my brothers had spoken of, while playing cards and relaxing with a drink or two, had opened himself up to me, however briefly. Those words “you were made for me and me only” that had fallen from his beautiful lips, I knew I would be able to hear forever.
Stop it!
I needed to take a hold of myself. I had to be wrong. The whole day had been a disaster, pulling from me every emotion that existed. I had to be wrong. I was well aware I would never be enough woman for a man like Dante Giordano.
‘We need to move.’ He nodded slightly at me in encouragement, and as he released my hand, I pulled myself from my thoughts.
‘We?’ Even after giving myself a good talking to, I couldn’t help the needy tone I spoke the single word with.
He moved to one side and placed the same hand to the small of my back. That small gesture gave me the courage to begin to move, and the feeling of the warmth of his fingertips seeping through my dress made me understand what possession must feel like. I liked it, much more than a good little ‘Ndrangheta princess should.
‘Yes,’ he replied with a determined English intonation, and all at once we were moving. Me one step ahead leading the way to a corridor I had previously loved to walk down, and him with his hand pressed resolutely just above my backside as he guided me to my destiny.
I’d always loved my grandfather’s rooms. They were him. They reeked of his personality, which came across as hard and unyielding in the mahogany half panels which covered every corridor and room. Yet they were also soft around the edges, in the subtle apricots and yellows my nonna had chosen. The fact he had the rooms repainted every year in the colours she’d chosen showed his more mellow side. It was a side to him that I felt probably only I, his beloved wife’s namesake and only granddaughter, was allowed to see. As soon as I left the large part of the house that had been decorated by my mama, I normally felt more at ease with myself, but not today.
The closer my feet took me towards his bedroom, a room I’d never been in before, the louder my heart began to sound inside my chest. Even breathing in deeply the impregnated smell of the Havanas he so loved to smoke to help keep me calm, wasn’t working. I comprehended that this meeting today would be the end of our journey, and I knew I just wasn’t ready.
As if he could feel this, Dante removed his hand from my back and took my hand once again, gripping it tighter in his hold.
Just before the doorway, I watched as Ricco, my nonno’s righthand man, stood up from the straight-backed chair he’d been resting on. Even he looked pained and drawn.
Completely ignoring Dante, who was walking alongside me, Ricco opened his arms to offer me comfort. Instinctively, I let go of Dante’s hand and like the small child who had run down the corridor to find her nonno, after experiencing her mama’s wrath many times before, I accepted his brief, but nonetheless comforting hug.
‘Your grandfather is waiting for you,’ he instructed as he released me.
‘I know,’ I agreed, desperate to see him and reluctant all at the same time.
‘I’ll wait here.’ Dante spoke from somewhere behind me.
‘No.’ Ricco spoke resolutely. ‘You have done your Don’s bidding, Dante Giordano, and he thanks you. Now it’s time for you to leave.’
Hearing he was being effectively given his marching orders, I spun around on the spot and flew into his unsuspecting arms. I could feel Ricco’s eyes burning into us both as Dante wrapped his arms tightly around me in a silent goodbye. For those few all too short seconds, my stuttered breathing regulated, my heart ceased to bang like a hammer in my chest and the anxiety I knew was beginning to take a hold released its vice-like grip on me. I was naive, I knew that. Hadn’t Dante only reminded me of that only earlier that afternoon? But I realised with his arms wrapped around me protectively, he understood me, he saw me and knew just what I needed. Tightening my hold around his firm, muscular body, I buried my face into his chest, and I took all he was willing to give. When his hand found the back of my head to cradle me to him, I breathed in the scent of him, committing it to memory. Between us and the hug that I instinctively knew was going on far too long in Ricco’s eyes, I felt a phone vibrate inside the front pocket of Dante’s trousers.
‘Your grandfather is waiting, Giovanna.’ Ricco spoke again, bringing us to our senses and making us break apart, until we were looking into each other’s eyes, searching for something we knew was there, but was so out of reach we couldn’t attempt to retrieve it.
Somewhere in that moment, I felt a sudden weight in one of the pockets of my dress, and I understood just what had happened when the vibration started again, only this time it was against my thigh. My eyes opened a little wider in question to his perusal and the small smirk that was beginning to lift the corners of his mouth.
‘Goodbye for now, Giovanna.’ Dante winked at me, after ducking slightly, making sure Ricco couldn’t see him.
‘Goodbye.’ I smiled, as our secret began to take hold in my imagination. ‘And thank you again.’
‘Giovanna.’ Ricco used my name again to insist I ended our conversation, and Dante pulled away from me before turning to walk back up the corridor towards my bodyguards who were waiting for him.
In the depth of my sorrow, I watched him walk away. But even though he never turned back I felt stronger. It was a strength I had only ever felt before while sitting in front of the grand piano my grandfather had bought me, with my fingers resting on ebony and ivory.
I blinked hard as Dante turned the corner, removing himself from my view. In doing so, I understood that I would get through that day and possibly the next few days for the sake of the family I loved, but I was doing so with the knowledge I was no longer alone.