41
“How is it this cold already?” Emme moans as we traipse from the tube station toward a fancy-looking pub. It’s only September but it is unseasonably cold, and in my tube top and skirt combo I am feeling the chill too. “And, why can’t Harry and Daisy have their engagement party in the city instead of the fucking Outer Hebrides?”
I snort, “I’d hardly call this the Outer Hebrides,”
“We’re in Zone 6, Delaney,” Emme says, “We might as well be in fucking Scotland,”
I laugh, “You’re so dramatic,”
Emme grins, “How are you feeling about tonight?”
I sigh. I’ve been meditating, doing breathwork, and listening to positive affirmations all week leading up to this moment. When we got the invite for Daisy and Harry’s official engagement party, I knew there was a chance that Miles would be there. He was at their house-warming, obviously.
Emme convinced me quite early on that even if he is back with Adriana, of which we still have no confirmation because even Jas doesn’t know, he is unlikely to bring her. These aren’t her friends, and Emme thinks he wouldn’t do that anyway. She is fully convinced he is going to be pining for me, wondering what went wrong, possibly swearing off women forever because of what a headcase I am.
It’s been a few weeks since I actually told Emme what happened and we’ve had more fights than ever before. Mostly because of what she calls my self-hating attitude. We’ve called a truce for tonight, but only if she promises to stay by my side all night and not let me anywhere near Miles.
When we finally push through the doors and I take in the sheer volume of people inside, I feel my heart step up a notch, bouncing off my ribcage. I take a few deep breaths and then lead Emme over to Daisy where we hug and congratulate them.
We fall into a steady conversation with Daisy about her wedding. She tells us that it’s going to be outside of the city and I have to stomp on Emme’s foot to stop her from telling Daisy that we’re already outside of the city. She tells Emme and me that we’re on the list for potential bridesmaids which Emme and I agree feels like a slight but probably shouldn’t, and then we join our other university friends at the table they have commandeered.
We’re all laughing about something Emme did in our third year when Harry appears at the table.
“Hey, Delaney,” he says, “Did I see a picture of you and Miles Stuart at a wedding last month?”
I frown, “Probably,” I say, not really wanting to hash this out right now. It’s like my brain forgot that Harry was friends with Miles and probably has seen all the pictures that Jas keeps tagging us both in on Instagram and Facebook, and I’m pretty sure Twitter at one point.
“I didn’t know you guys knew each other,” Harry says.
I sigh, “Yeah, sort of,” I say, “I was his date to his cousin’s wedding,”
Harry frowns, “Really?” he says, “He never mentioned knowing you before,”
I snort, and Emme leans in, “We’re not talking about him right now, Harry,” she says. Probably because she’s enjoying our truce.
Harry’s frown deepens, “Oh,” he says, “Listen, you know he’s coming tonight, right?” he adds, as though sensing why Emme is acting like she’s my protector.
I nod, “It’s all good,”
Harry squints and then nods.
*
I spend most of the party on hyper-alert and am quite disappointed that it reaches 10 pm and I’ve still not seen him. Even though I wanted to avoid him, I knew my brain—the self-destructive little prick it is—wanted to glimpse him just once.
So, I am feeling a little deflated and much less vigilant when I head to the toilet on my own for the first time. It’s nice to get there without a wall of girls around me. Girls who Emme filled in on Miles (Delaney’s version) and decided it was their sworn duty to protect me at all costs. Honestly, women, man. We’re fucking amazing when we stick together.
I am looking in the mirror at the makeup flaking off my face when my phone buzzes. It’s a message from Jas. She’s been so unbelievably supportive that it actually makes me hate past me for disliking her.
Jas : Seeing Carrie tonight, going to tell her her cousin is a prick. Good luck tonight, if you see him, remember you’re an angel and he doesn’t deserve you.
I grin, rolling my eyes and sending a love heart emoji back. I reapply my lipstick and head out the door coming face to face with the person I’ve been avoiding for 6 weeks.
“Del,” he says, sounding equally as surprised to find me here.