Chapter 10
“You’ll be pleased to know that I feel good enough to leave this afternoon.”
This afternoon?
Ylva blinked and stared at her friend. Of course she was delighted to hear that Judith felt well enough to make plans but she had not imagined that these plans would signify their immediate departure.
In truth, and quite stupidly, she hadn’t given the future any thought.
She had imagined that she would go back to the beach every other day, carry on with her riding lessons, get to know Rothgar, whom she had heard so much about, sleep outside again, in the forest this time—and kiss Ulf every chance she got…
She stilled when she realized that all she had thought about involved him in one way or another.
But why would he want to keep her, the woman who had tried to kill him, under his roof?
With Mildred gone, she didn’t need any more protection.
He would probably think himself well rid of her when she left.
Judith, oblivious to her dismay, carried on talking. “I asked Helga if there was someone who could drive us back into town.”
This was another shock. “You want to go back to town?”
“Yes. The only people we know are there. Now that Mildred is gone, I see no reason to go somewhere else.”
Ylva saw many reasons to do so. She had enjoyed her time in the village, and not just because Ulf was there.
She had enjoyed being surrounded by trees and bird song, seeing the river and the animals upon waking up, being able to forage for food.
Even more to the point, her soul had found the peace it needed here, in the quiet environment.
She wasn’t ready—or willing—to go back to the bustle and dirt of the town.
“I’m not sure it is the best choice for me,” she mumbled, feeling uncomfortable. This was the first time she and Judith did not agree on something.
Her friend cocked her head, surprised. “Is it not? Anyway, that is something we can discuss later,” she said, clearly as disconcerted as she was by the idea that they disagreed.
“For now, a man called Haakon has agreed to drive the smithy’s cart for us.
His father is a goldsmith and he has to go into town to get some gems for him, so it will cost him nothing. I believe you know him?”
“Yes, I know Haakon.”
Well. That was not exactly true. Their interaction had been limited, but he had been the one who had stopped her from delivering a second blow to Ulf, the blow that might have killed or mortally wounded him.
The idea had been disturbing at the time, it was now unthinkable.
She was more grateful than she could say to have been stopped in time.
She had not deserved to become a killer—and Ulf had not deserved to die.
“But surely there is no rush—”
“No, I know, but I cannot stay here. Forgive me,” Judith breathed.
“The people have been nothing but kind, but I hate feeling in their debt for what they did. I also cannot help but feel they see me as a victim. Old Helga knows what happened to me and pities me. I cannot bear it. I just want to forget, be with people who don’t know I was a slave or what happened with Walstan. Do you understand?”
She did understand.
There would be no swaying Judith, if she was determined to go back to a normal life and leave all the suffering behind.
After what she had gone through, it made sense and Ylva sympathized.
The only problem was, she was starting to suspect that the best place for her to heal after her own ordeal was here, precisely because it was filled with people who had been nothing but kind.
Because Ulf was here.
“People in town know about us being slaves,” she could not help but say.
“I know, I know.” Judith sounded on the verge of tears. “But at least they don’t know about the other—”
“Very well, we’ll leave,” Ylva cut in, hating to see her so distressed. “But can we at least stay another day?” she asked, doing her best to buy time. “There are many people here whom I owe my thanks to. I would like time to go see them.”
“Of course. I can tell Haakon we’ll leave in the morning.”
In the morning. It was a reprieve, but a very short one. Ylva nodded, feeling chilled to her soul.
“I will go and tell Ulf.”
She found him in the vegetable patch at the back of his hut, putting up a fence to separate the space in two.
Posts had been planted at regular intervals and long, supple twigs woven through them.
They had been piled one on top of the other in something that resembled a wall and now reached knee height.
Ylva watched on, fascinated. Having lived inside a town house nearly all her life, she had no idea what people living in a village did all day.
And no one was more interesting to watch than this beautiful man who worked with fast yet elegant movements.
How high did he intend to go? Her chest tightened when she realized that she would be gone by then.
She would never see what became of the fence.
She would never see what became of Ulf, the first man she had kissed.
The only man she had ever felt desire for.
He straightened to stretch his back and saw her.
A dazzling smile bloomed on his lips. Her heart skipped a beat.
To know she could provoke such a reaction in him was wonderful.
Perhaps he was drawn to her as she was to him.
Alas, now she would never know if the attraction she was sure they felt for one another would lead anywhere.
Letting Judith leave on her own was unthinkable, as she was the only thing even resembling a family that she had in this world.
“Ah. Ylva. Did you want anything?”
No. But there was something she had to tell him, much as she was loath to do so.
“I… Judith is feeling better and is ready to leave the village. We’ll go tomorrow morning, with Haakon.”
He stilled and it seemed to her that the light in his eyes had dimmed somewhat.
Eventually, he answered. “That is good news. I mean, it is good that she feels restored to her usual self,” he specified quickly when he saw her face fall.
For a dreadful moment, she had thought he was glad to hear that he would finally be rid of her.
“Yes.”
It was good news. But, alas, it meant that they had to leave. Where would they live now? What would they do? They were free to go and do what they wanted but the problem was, after spending so many years as slaves or fugitives trying to hide, there was nowhere they could call home.
All she knew was that she would persuade Judith not to stay in the town where they had been so unhappy. Her friend wanted a fresh start. For that to happen, they needed to be somewhere where no one knew them and they could start anew.
Who would they become? Not sisters, as they looked too dissimilar for the lie to work. But calling one another merely “friend” seemed ridiculous after all they had gone through together, and all they had done at night.
“I was wondering if you could take me to your aunt so I can thank her for the dress before I go,” Ylva told Ulf, pushing those thoughts away from her mind. “But I see you’re busy.”
“Not to worry.” He put down the twig he’d just picked up and walked closer to her. “I’ll take you to Aife now. I can always finish the fence tomorrow.”
Yes. Tomorrow, once she was gone.
She nodded, unable to say anything.