Chapter 3
Theo
When the door closes with a soft click, my body slumps. Fuck, I’m exhausted.
Bracing my elbows on my knees, I bury my face in my hands, forcing deep breaths into my lungs.
The drive here almost took it out of me. I’m alone a lot. I don’t make friends easily. Not anymore, anyway, but all humans need some form of social interaction. I usually get that at work. But hey, I don’t even have a job anymore.
I still can’t believe I quit to come here. But they didn’t really give me a choice. It was either quit or not come, since they wouldn’t approve my time off. If I weren’t so tired, I think I’d be panicking about that. As it stands, I don’t really know that I care.
Shifting to the side, I pull my phone out of my pocket.
Me
I made it, but the drive was long. Is it okay if I come by tomorrow instead of tonight?
Luca’s response comes in almost instantly.
Luca
Of course. I’m glad you made it safely. Millie and Hunter will take good care of you in the meantime.
I chose this place instead of the hotel in the next town, at Luca’s suggestion. He said it was close to him. And quiet. I need quiet.
Hunter is anything but quiet. He’s endearing, though. I can admit that. Younger than me, I think, but I can’t be sure of how much.
At thirty-two, I feel ancient. Not really because of my age, but because of my body and, more than that, my mind.
My stomach growls loudly, reminding me that I haven’t eaten all day. I press a hand to it, more annoyed than anything else. Hunger feels like a demand I don’t have the energy to meet.
Eating means deciding what to make. Making it. Chewing. Swallowing. It feels like more than I want to handle. More than I can handle.
I shift sideways in the bed, relaxing into it. It’s comfortable—softer than my worn-down mattress at home—and without much thought, I let my head drop back onto the pillows.
My eyes fall closed almost instantly, but my stomach growls loudly again.
I’m not sure that I’ll get away with going to bed without eating.
Not tonight. Tonight, I think my hunger will win over my need for sleep.
Maybe that’s a good sign. I can’t afford another week like this last one. Not if I’m to be at Luca’s tomorrow.
After forcing myself to sit up, I push to my feet and take another look around the room. It’s cute. Bigger than I expected, with warm, sage-green walls, a built-in fireplace, and tall trim. I’m not sure what stands out so much about the trim, but I like it. It feels… inviting.
Jesus. I roll my eyes. I can’t believe I’m going on about trim.
I step into the small attached bathroom. Stand-up shower, toilet, small sink. There are toiletries lining the edge of the shower and towels draped over the rack across from the toilet. It’s nothing fancy, but it’ll serve my purposes just fine.
It would probably make me feel better to clean myself up some after the trip, but I’d rather eat, and if I try to shower first, who knows if I’ll actually make it downstairs.
Not me. So when my stomach growls again, I shut the bathroom door and slowly make my way down the stairs.
I’m not always good around new people, but I trust Luca. Maybe I shouldn’t; I don’t even know him, but he feels like a kindred spirit. So when he says that the Locks are good people, I have to believe that.
I reach the bottom step and pause. “Hello?” I call out. Maybe I should have asked for a tour or something.
“Theodore.” It’s Hunter again. He’s smiling at me as he rounds the corner, and for a second, I’m frozen.
When was the last time someone smiled at me like that?
I couldn’t even say. I worked nights at the gas station, so most of the customers were as tired as me, grabbing energy drinks and shitty food to get them through the night.
Sometimes we got the occasional parent coming in to buy meds for sick kids since nothing else was open. But even they weren’t much for smiling.
“Hi,” I say, which might be the dumbest thing I’ve ever said.
He grins again. “Hello.”
He’s gotta be in his early or mid-twenties. His fluffy brown hair is sticking out around a faded ball cap, and his jaw is smooth and angular. He doesn’t break eye contact for a minute, and the warm hazel of his eyes is full of light—like the world hasn’t broken him yet.
He looks like he fits in here. In a way that I don’t. His worn jeans are stained with dirt, and I can barely make out a hint of black ink showing past the long-sleeve white tee he’s wearing.
“What?” I ask when I realize he asked a question, and I was too busy taking in his attire to hear him.
“I asked if you needed something.”
I nod. “Dinner. If that’s still an option. I’m not sure where the kitchen is.”
He lights up. “Absolutely. I’m glad you decided to eat after all. This way.”
Waving for me to join him, he takes a step away. I follow, keeping my eyes down.
When we step into the kitchen and the scent hits my nose, my stomach twists.
“Hey, Mom. This is Theodore. Theodore, this is my mom, Millie. She runs the place.”
An older woman with dark brown hair and the same hazel eyes as Hunter turns to me with a soft grin. “It’s nice to meet you. I’ve just about got dinner finished up. Anything we can get you to drink?”
“Just water is fine. It’s really nice to meet you too, ma’am.”
She tuts. “No ma’ams here, please. Just call me Millie.”
I nod. “Alright. You can call me Theo.”
Until I got divorced from Damien, I didn’t hate my full name, but he always called me Theodore. It doesn’t matter how someone says it; it sends the same icy chill down my spine that it did back then.
“So,” Millie says, turning back to the stove. Hunter pulls out a chair and gestures for me to sit down. “What brings you to Silverpine?”
How do I answer that? Yeah, the man I was married to for six years, who repeatedly beat the shit out of me, raped me, and then tried to murder me, was killed here. Oh, and I’m meeting the man who got caught in his abuse right after. “A friend,” I settle on instead.
I can feel Hunter’s eyes on me, so I glance in his direction, and he looks away. I study his profile for a second. I’m feeling better than I’ve felt all week, so I take a chance. Clearing my throat, I tip my head toward Hunter. “Do you know Luca Pierce?”
He nods. “Yeah, I know pretty much everyone around these parts.”
My lips twitch in what feels like the start of a smile. “Is he… nice? He’s the friend I’m here to meet.”
Ugh. What a stupid question. Obviously Luca’s nice. He invited me here.
Hunter smiles, his eyes going a little hazy. “He is. He and Austin both.”
It’s wild to me that Luca already has a boyfriend.
I haven’t so much as looked at another man since Damien.
Though these days, it’s more that I don’t have the energy for it rather than just not wanting to.
At first, sure, I was too scared out of my damn mind to even think about another man, but now…
Now it’s mostly that I don’t want them seeing me.
“Are you nervous about meeting them?”
I shake my head, but then nod. “Yeah, kind of, I guess.”
Hunter gives me a smile. “Understandable. But they’re great people.”
I’m not really sure what to say to that, so I don’t say anything.
Instead, I look down at the table, waiting for dinner to be served.
I’m so hungry that my stomach is eating itself, and I’m getting a little lightheaded, so when Millie places a plate in front of me after bringing dishes to the table, telling me to dig in, I don’t waste any time.
I eat until I’m so full I couldn’t possibly handle another bite, and when I shove my plate away and glance up, I find Hunter staring at me with a slight grin.
When the door to Luca and Austin’s house swings open, I’m met with a grin and the most unusual set of gray eyes I’ve ever seen.
“Theo, I’m so glad you could make it,” the man says, his already impossibly wide smile somehow growing bigger. “I’m Luca. Come on in.”
I swallow hard, trying to tamp down my nerves. I didn’t sleep worth a shit last night, and I wasn’t expecting this level of excitement.
Stepping through the door before I can talk myself out of it, I take a look around. This place is cute. Small and homey, with none of the clinical touches I grew so used to with Damien. It’s also nothing like my run-down apartment at home.
Luca waves me toward him and sits on the couch. “Have a seat.”
Following him, I sit down beside him, crossing one knee over the other and wrapping my arms around my stomach in an attempt to shield myself. From what, I’m not sure. But it feels necessary. “Thank you for inviting me.”
He nods. “I’m glad you decided to come. Austin’s working today, but I thought we could hang out. Maybe I could make lunch?”
“That would be alright, I think.” Although I ate so much last night that I spent the first few hours in my rented bed wondering if I was going to throw it all back up. I’ll have to be careful to pace myself.
Luca pats his thighs. “So…”
“So,” I echo.
It’s strange being here, staring into the eyes of the man who suffered the same fate as me. I don’t know what to do or what to say or how to act. I thought this would feel different. Not that this feels bad per se, but… I don’t know.
“Is there anything you want to talk to me about?” Luca asks softly, his voice dropping like he’s trying to keep from being overheard even though no one is around.
The only thing that comes to mind is, “How long did he abuse you?”
He bites his bottom lip. “Seven years.”
I blink, then blink again. “Our divorce was finalized seven years ago.”
Luca nods slowly. “Yeah… I had no idea. According to the documents you provided to the sheriff’s office, you had been divorced for two weeks when he moved me in.”
The documents… The photos of me. The police reports.
The proof of my failure. All of it still shames me.
And the consequence of my failure is sitting across from me, his gray eyes sad and eyebrows drawn together.
I gave them those photos as proof. In case they needed to document a pattern to keep Austin from getting into trouble for essentially beating Damien to death.
I gave them permission to share the file with Luca if he wanted to see it.
My stomach aches at the thought of anyone else seeing it.
“How old are you?” I ask.
Luca cocks his head. “Twenty-six.”
My throat closes up. “You were just a baby when it started.”
He nods, leaning closer to me, lowering his voice even more. “So were you, though.”
My eyes burn, but I really don’t want to cry. “I’m sorry I failed you.”
He sinks back into the couch, his jaw clenching as he cocks his head at me. “What do you mean?”
I shake my head. “I didn’t think… I—I tried, you know? I did all the right things. Reported it. Gave my testimony in court. If I hadn’t failed, I could have saved you from this.”
Luca studies me for a second. “The only person at fault is Damien. You’re not culpable for his crimes.”
I’m not sure that we’re ever going to agree on that, but instead of arguing, I just nod. “Okay.”
“I’m an open book,” he says softly. “You can ask me anything.”
I shake my head. “Maybe later. For now, I think I’d just like to get to know you as a human and maybe get that lunch.”
He brightens. “I was thinking grilled cheese and soup. Austin made it for me my first day back in town, and it was exactly what I needed.”
“This is my second day in town, though,” I tease, trying to force myself to smile and match Luca’s energy.
“Well,” he says, smiling at me. “Better late than never.”
“Sure.” I nod, hoping my stomach doesn’t betray me. “That sounds great.”