Chapter 46 Maddy
MADDY
Things weren’t going well. Seeing the video of my mother being tortured had done something to me.
Not only to me but to my wolf. My temper was shorter than usual, and I kept having to catch myself.
Multiple times I wanted to lash out at Nico or Felipe and Luis, and especially Sebastian.
It was so bad that I tended to stay away from everyone when they came over.
A delivery driver had dropped off a package the day before.
It was a package I had ordered, but he put it on the first step of the porch instead of the welcome mat by the door.
It was such a small thing, but I’d nearly lost my mind.
I’d gone stomping down the walkway toward his truck, yelling at him.
Thankfully, Nico had been there to haul me back inside.
I’d really been ready to chew the poor guy out for something so trivial and stupid.
Deep down, I knew most of what I was feeling wasn’t anger—it was fear.
Fear of what would happen to my family. Fear of what the royals were planning.
Fear of what the hell was going on with my wolf.
I wasn’t a violent person by nature. I didn’t have any concerns that I would actually hurt someone, which was nice and one less thing to worry about.
Still, as much as I was sure I wouldn't hurt anyone, the memory of how I’d reacted to the video haunted me.
Never in my life had I felt such an overwhelming and blood-boiling anger.
The weirdest part is that the anger stemmed, not from my mother’s torture, but from the sight of Viola herself.
My human anger had been terrible, but the wolf’s anger had been apoplectic. She’d been infuriated beyond belief.
A few days after we’d watched the video, Nico found me sitting in the dark in his office, my back to the door as I stared out the window. I was trying to do some of those calming meditations he’d shown me and was having varying degrees of success.
“Maddy?” he asked hesitantly.
I spun in his office chair to face him. “Yeah?”
“Do… do you want to go out and get a coffee or something?”
My spirits lifted almost immediately at the thought.
I liked coffee, yes, but that wasn’t the main reason I was excited.
Ever since we’d returned from Europe, I’d spent nearly all my time in Nico’s house or around the shifter neighborhood.
With the bar closed and the royals doing God knew what, it hadn’t felt safe to be out in town.
But, Christ, I was getting cabin fever, which was probably exacerbating the irritation and anger I’d been experiencing.
There were only so many rooms to go to, only so much yard to stroll through before you started to hate what you were looking at.
I stood up. “Hell yes!”
Nico and I hopped into his truck and made our way to the downtown area of Clearidge.
I rolled my window down and let the wind blow across my face.
Nico’s house was a step or two away from being a full-fledged mansion, but it had started to feel like a prison.
Getting out was freeing in a way it had never been before.
Nico, for his part, let us drive in silence.
It was a companionable silence, though, not awkward or strained.
I think he knew I needed this more than even I did.
We pulled up outside a small mom-and-pop coffee and pastry shop that looked out over the Clearidge park and pond.
I’d always thought the shop looked cute but had never managed to get in there over the years.
When we walked in, the earthy smell of freshly roasted coffee and the sweet smell of baked goods lifted my mood in an instant.
I ordered a vanilla iced coffee and a chocolate croissant. Nico got a cappuccino and a piece of strawberry pound cake, then we found seats that overlooked the park. I glanced over at Nico as he took the first sip of his drink. “Thanks. I was getting a little stir-crazy.”
He nodded and dabbed at his mouth with his napkin. “I could tell,” he said with a knowing grin.
I sighed and rolled my eyes. “I’m sorry for how I’ve been acting.”
“It’s not your fault. I think we’ve established that.”
I nodded. “Yeah. Still.” I shrugged.
“You know, the last few days, I’ve been wishing we could still talk to Kenneth,” he said wistfully.
The mention of my dead uncle filled me with multiple emotions.
I was sad because he’d been the one connection to my birth family I had, and I’d grown to really like him over the days we spent with him.
I was also filled with anger—anger at him for betraying us, but also at the royals for killing him.
They were the reason he was so tortured in the first place.
If not for them, my birth father would be alive.
Maybe he and Kenneth could have figured things out over time.
He could have been a different person without them.
I took a drink of my coffee before answering. “It would be nice to talk to someone with some insight, that’s for sure.”
“What if we tried to find more of your family?” Nico asked.
I frowned. “What family? Everyone is dead. At least anyone I can think of to try and find. The royals have made it their mission to kill anyone associated with the Edemas bloodline. Kenneth was probably the only person worth talking to.”
Nico jerked his chin toward me. “Obviously, the royals aren’t as good at finding the descendants as they thought they were. You’re a perfect example. Maybe there are others they’ve missed. Also…” He gave me a weird look. “What if Kenneth was keeping secrets up until he died?”
“What other secrets?”
“I’ve been wondering lately… What if your birth mother was still alive?”
I nearly choked on my coffee. I wiped my lips with a napkin and gaped at Nico. “What? Where are you going with this?”
He held up a hand. “Hear me out. Right at the end, he told us that he’d been in love with her.
Once your birth father was dead, he may have hidden her away to keep her safe.
If he loved her as much as he said he did, he might have orchestrated her death to get the royals to stop trying to find her. ”
I sighed and shook my head. “Nico, I feel like you're grasping at straws here.”
“Sure, it’s a long shot. Except, the more I think about it, the more it makes sense.
You were there. You saw what Kenneth was like when he talked about her.
He didn’t seem heartbroken or grieving—it was more like there was a longing in his tone when he talked about her.
As though she wasn’t gone, just out of reach. It feels like it could be right.”
“Okay,” I said. “Let’s say we do believe she’s alive. What’s the move? If Kenneth hid her so well that the entire world thinks she’s dead, how do we find her?”
“We’ve got her picture and her name from the yearbook. The royals think she’s dead, which means they wouldn’t have been looking for her. After all these years, she may have become less wary of being found. I bet Luis would have a good chance at locating her if we really went all in on this.”
From his enthusiastic tone, it sounded like Nico had been thinking about this for a few days. I had to admit the idea made me nervous and eager at the same time. I didn’t want to get my hopes up, but we had nothing else to go on.
“I really think that she may have some answers about your wolf and why she’s acting the way she is. If your dad had some knowledge, he probably shared it with her. He was closer to your birth mother than anyone, even Kenneth.”
It did seem like a last-ditch effort, but I didn’t know what else we could do. We’d exhausted every other option. I shrugged. “Okay. Let’s see what we can find.”
We finished our drinks and snacks before heading back home.
After getting our computers, we searched using the name we had.
We turned up over a dozen different Gabriella Karsons, but every time we were able to pull up a picture, it looked nothing like the beautiful young woman from the yearbook photo.
Then we decided to try different combinations of her name and my birth father’s name.
The variations went on and on. Gabriella Davids, Gabby Samuelson, Karson Samuels.
We even tried crazy things like Davidina Gabriella. No luck.
Hours later, I flopped down on the couch, a headache forming behind my eyes. “This is a waste of time, Nico. She’s dead. We have to admit that.”
“No, I don’t think so. Maybe we aren’t thinking about it the right way.”
“If she was alive and Kenneth loved her as much as he said, I doubt he’d have stayed away from her for long stretches…” I trailed off, an idea forming.
“What are you thinking?” Nico asked, obviously seeing the look on my face.
“Kenneth had that safe house in Europe, but where did he stay when he was in America? If she’s alive, he’d have wanted to be close to her.”
Nico grabbed his phone. “Let me call Luis. He had the most contact with him while they were searching for the vault.”
I walked over, listening to the phone ring.
Luis finally answered. “This is Luis. What’s up?”
“Hey, I’m here with Maddy, and we have a question,” Nico said.
“Okay, what’ve you got?”
“When you were working with Kenneth, did you get any info on where he lived while he was in the states?”
“Well, if you recall, I was searching for him before he came strolling into the bar of his own accord. I’d found some traces of him in Tampa. That’s where I’d been looking.”
“Did you ever pinpoint his location?” I asked.
“Nope. Once he revealed himself, I gave up. No reason to keep looking when he was right there. I don't know if he lived right inside Tampa, but he had to be close. The fact that he’d heard we were looking for him means he couldn’t have been too far removed from my search area. Are you guys working on something?”
Nico chewed his lower lip and looked at me questioningly. I gave him a nod to go on. “We think, maybe, Maddy’s birth mother might still be alive. I’ve got a theory that Kenneth hid her away and faked her death to keep her safe.”
“Oh shit. Seriously?” Luis asked.
“Like I said, it’s only a theory, but we want to run it down. One way or another, we need to know for sure,” Nico said.
“Okay. I’m more than happy to keep running down leads. If she’s alive, I'm pretty confident I can find her. I don’t want to toot my own horn, but I’m pretty damned good at what I do.”
“I think he’s right,” I said, nudging Nico. “We’ve got too much to deal with to add this investigation to it.”
Nico nodded. “All right. Luis, you get on this. We’ll focus on training the packs and trying to get Maddy through her first shift. I really think she’s close.”
“Okay. I’ll dig up my info from before and head out to Tampa tomorrow morning sometime. Send me whatever you have on Maddy’s birth mom. I’ll go from there.”
After we got off the phone, we sent Luis the few pictures of her that we had.
There weren’t many, but it would probably help.
We also let him know the name and address of the high school she’d attended.
I looked at her smiling picture on the screen after we sent it and felt a pang of sadness for Kenneth.
I couldn't imagine loving someone and not having them reciprocate. I glanced at Nico as he worked on his computer and wondered how I’d feel if that happened between us.
Me pining away for a man I knew didn’t want me that way. Ugh, it sounded depressing as hell.
When we were in bed that night, I had another semi-anxiety attack.
My wolf was acting up again. Sweat broke out on my body, and I had a tremor in my hands.
My breathing elevated, and my pulse started to ratchet higher with each passing moment.
The wolf was trying to assert herself again.
Nico held me close and whispered that things would be all right.
It wasn’t a bad attack, but I was still consumed with guilt and shame once I’d regained my composure. Nico must have noticed.
“Are you okay? Do you need anything?”
I shook my head. “I feel like I’m putting you through so much more than I need to. Like I’m this heavy burden you have to bear.”
He stroked a hand through my hair. “That’s what I’m here for.”
“Thank you for being so patient with me. I don’t know what I would do if you weren’t so understanding all the time.”
“Well, I’d be a pretty shitty mate if I couldn’t help you through this—a shitty mate and an even shittier alpha. I protect my pack. That means everyone in it. My mate most of all.” He pulled me closer. “You can rest easy. I’ve always got your back.”
For once, I did rest easy, falling asleep in seconds. The entire night went by in blissful, dreamless sleep.