Chapter 11 Snow
SNOW
Later, I’ll ask myself what the hell I was thinking.
Throwing myself at Xander like I have no self-respect isn’t the wisest thing I’ve ever done, but I can’t help myself.
Everything is crumbling.
My life is a mess.
And in forty-eight hours, I will get a phone call that will dictate how I need to live the rest of my life, thanks to the needle that ended up in my arm.
So what if I want the taste of one good thing from an attractive man who, apparently, shares the same fleeting interest igniting in my own heart?
Xander stands by the window, cloaked in shadow after closing the curtains.
His white shirt takes on a slightly sheer appearance as the only light remaining in the room comes from the bedside lamp near him.
He shifts ever so subtly, and the fabric appears to cling to the muscles hidden underneath, creating deeper shadows across his body.
Silence drags on as I wait for his answer, and my skin clings to the last remaining warmth that lingers from my discarded clothing.
The collar of his shirt rests open just enough that I glimpse the faintest hint of dark hair across his chest.
One of his hands curls into a fist, and despite not making a sound, his jaw twitches and the nerve just beneath his ear jumps like something is trying to escape.
My heart pounds.
My body warms.
And for a few hot seconds under his gaze, I fear that cold rejection is hiding in those impossibly dark eyes of his.
Then Xander speaks and his usual calm, monotone voice is replaced by something so deep that the words vibrate through the air toward me.
“You really think there’s something we can do that will quell my urge to jump on you and fuck you right now?”
The first tendrils of chill from being naked immediately vanish as warmth blooms across my entire body.
Xander’s words ignite something deep inside me and I can’t keep the smile from my face.
“You said yourself that we can’t,” I say, slightly breathless from how fiercely my heart pounds. “So you’ll have to settle for something else.”
“You’re something else, Snow,” he says, and each note of that gravelly voice strokes my soul in the best way.
I want to close my eyes and listen to him talk until I’m wrapped up in his words and tone. I want to feel that voice vibrate against my throat while I drive him crazy.
I can’t have those things, so this is the next best thing. “Take your clothes off.”
“Are you telling me what to do?” His wandering gaze snaps back to my face and my cheeks flare.
“What are you going to do about it?”
The challenge rises in me and Xander steps forward, then his entire body appears to turn rigid as he restrains himself from whatever thoughts are swirling behind those dark eyes.
“I know what you want.” His hands rise and his fingers stroke over each button on his shirt until he reaches the top one.
Then, very slowly, he eases the button through the fabric. One by one, each button slides open and inch by inch, more of his bare chest is revealed.
God, what else can those fingers do?
I slide back on the bed until I rest back against the pillows, watching him closely.
Heat curls through my gut and settles low in my core where my pussy clenches as Xander’s fingers skim over his abs.
What would those fingers feel like against my own skin?
Would they be as cold as they are when he’s tending to me or would they be warm with desire?
I want to know what his skin feels like, warm from his clothing or cool like the rest of him?
Xander slowly shrugs off his shirt.
Miles of impressive muscle suddenly reveal themselves and my eyes widen. In all my years of passing him in the hall and working alongside him, I never knew he was so toned.
From the sleek, smooth curves of muscles down his arms to the six-pack leading up to large pecs covered in a dusting of dark hair, he’s gorgeous.
I cling to the burst of confidence that made me shed my clothes because I severely lack the tone he has, but it doesn’t seem to bother him in the slightest.
“Are we just going to strip and stare at one another?” Xander asks.
A shiver shoots from my shoulders to my thighs. Tingles of anticipation rise. “You said we can’t touch one another.”
“We can’t,” Xander says, and he sounds like he regrets ever uttering such a thing. His hands drop to the black leather belt around his waist. “Your health is more important than anything else.”
“More important than this?” Sliding my feet up the bed until my knees are bent, I let them fall open to the sides while my heart thunders painfully in my chest.
Xander’s eyes drop immediately to my pussy and his jaw tics once more. “You’re wet.”
“Can you blame me?” Grasping at my breast, I moan softly as a pulse of pleasure shoots through my core while I tweak my hardened nipple.
Then I slide my hand over my abdomen and down to the rise of my mound between my legs. “You’ve treated me so well, came this close to kissing me, and now you’re looking at me like you want to eat me up.”
“Every inch,” Xander growls.
He swallows audibly and his throat bobs like his restraint is strangling him.
As he unbuckles his belt, his pants tighten briefly and a dark shadow cuts into the dark fabric.
A trick of the light or is he hiding a monster in those pants?
“I showed you mine.” My voice slips, and the words come out in a whisper while I slide my fingers through my pussy and gently part my outer lips. “Show me yours.”
Xander’s eyes close briefly, then he rips his belt from his pants so fast that the leather snaps like a clap in the air. I jump, and another rush of tingles dances over my skin.
He unzips his pants and shoves them down enough that the sexy V-line of muscle comes into view and my mouth runs dry.
The line is so defined, I could sink my teeth in deep and I think he’d thank me.
His pants fall away and he steps out of them, moving around the bed until he’s next to me.
Heat radiates from him in waves and my heart pounds so hard with excitement that he can surely hear it.
Very slowly, Xander leans over and plants both his hands on the bed on either side of me, holding my gaze with his.
“If you come before me,” he says, his voice low, “then the next time we do this, you don’t come until I say so.”
My pussy tightens suddenly and a gasp escapes me as desire collides with need low in my core.
Unable to stop myself, I surge upward as every desire within me screams for a kiss, contact, something.
Xander’s faster and he pulls away with a smirk.
“There’s no way,” I gasp softly. “No way that you win.”
“Oh, really?” Xander takes the seat by the door and as he sits, he slides forward an inch and spreads his legs.
Light blue boxers cover his hips and frustration warms my chest.
“You’re not playing by the rules,” I point out. “Cheater.”
“You really want to see?”
I nod. If the tent in his boxers is anything to go by, then he’s carrying something at least an inch thicker than my favorite toy back home.
Trying to maintain composure fails as Xander lifts his hips from the seat and slowly slides his boxers down.
As they fall from his knees, he kicks them away and resumes his wide-spread position.
I forget to breathe.
His hard cock rests in his left palm, as thick as I imagined and curving slightly to the left.
Beneath his knuckles, his balls rest neatly just underneath and they twitch slightly as he adjusts his grip.
Dampness beads at the crown of his cock, glistening in the low light, and my mouth runs dry as I follow the thick vein that ridges along the side of his cock.
I want to taste it.
I want it.
I want him.
I want to feel that inside me, reaching deeper than anyone has ever reached before, resting inside me like a comforting weight and bringing me to pleasure I’ve never felt before.
My core tightens at the thought and I relax my fingers to caress my clit, barely able to hold back a moan.
“You still think you can win?” Xander remarks softly, his chest heaving as he strokes himself from the base of his cock to the crown.
More pre-cum beads and rolls down his length, joining his fingers on the next slow stroke. “Look at you. One glance and you can’t even control yourself.”
His words alert me to the fact that my hips are rolling on their own, mimicking the slow stroke of his hand as if trying to chase the sensation of what he would feel like inside me.
I’m burning up.
My skin is so hot that the sheets are sticking to my back.
My abdomen tightens rhythmically and I breathe in deep while sliding my fingers through my slick folds.
As I plunge my fingers inside myself, I know he’s going to win.
I’m too turned on already and we’ve barely done anything.
The anticipation Xander creates is enough to fog my mind. Sinking back into the pillows, I arch slightly and shove my fingers as deep as
I can until pleasure bursts through my core and I can’t hold in my moan.
“You’re thinking about it, aren’t you?” Xander says, his voice thick.
“About how my cock would feel inside you. How deep it would reach. How you’d lose all sense with me pounding into you until you can’t breathe.
You’re thinking about my lips on your skin, suckling on your nipples just enough to make them throb in time to my thrusts.
It’s all you can think about, isn’t it?”
I’m going to lose and I’m not even mad about it.
“Maybe I am,” I gasp as my fingers thrust deeper and deeper.
My palm shifts with each thrust, teasing my clit with each rock of my hips while I grope and tease my nipple with my free hand. “But I can smell your jealousy from here.”
“My jealousy?” Xander’s hand pauses against his cock for a moment. “What am I jealous of?”