Chapter 13
Bonnie’s fingers wrapped tightly around the wheel. So tightly that her knuckles were white.
She was nervous. She probably didn’t need to be nervous.
This was her family. But not just one or two members—her entire family.
Well, except Aunt Pam. Bars weren’t really her aunt’s thing.
But she was about to see everyone else. Her siblings.
Her cousins. Everyone’s partners. She’d seen so many of them already, she shouldn’t be nervous.
But this was different. This was everyone all at once.
Maybe she was also a bit nervous because she had so much going on. Heck, a week ago, someone had spray-painted a threatening message on the back door of The Pit.
They’d left no evidence of who’d done it. It was a mystery. Just like the person who’d assaulted her outside her apartment.
Noah was angry. So was Jesse. They were trained soldiers, and right now, someone was slipping beneath their radar.
To make everything worse, the only time she’d seen Zane in the last week was during the shelter’s self-defense lesson. And dammit, she missed him. She missed the feeling of safety he instilled in her. She missed his touch. His voice.
But he didn’t want to be with her. He clearly had a secret, and that secret felt like an immoveable mountain between them.
She turned right, CJ’s coming into view up ahead. Even from here, she could see how busy the bar was. Cars packed the road. People were coming and going from the entrance.
It felt strange coming to the bar as an adult. She’d lived her entire childhood in Amber Ridge. She’s walked past CJ’s so many times but never gone inside.
When she pulled into the parking lot, she didn’t get straight out. She didn’t even take off her seat belt. She just sat there, a million thoughts playing over in her head.
Sometimes she wondered what would have happened if she’d never left. Would the pain of her parents dying have eased faster? Would she and Indie have grown closer rather than apart? And would the White family eventually have stopped blaming her for their son’s death?
Maybe some of that stuff might have happened. Or maybe she would have drowned. Maybe as a young eighteen-year-old who felt responsible for the deaths of those closest to her, the water would have lapped over her head, and she would have sunk to the bottom of the ocean.
A knock on the window made her jump and turn to see Noah on the other side of the glass.
Time was up.
She unclipped her seat belt, grabbed her cell and keys, and climbed out.
But it wasn’t just Noah outside her car. A woman with blond hair stood beside him.
Noah tugged Bonnie into his arms. “Hey, Bon.”
She dug her head into Noah’s chest. It was strange how so much time could pass, and they could both change into completely different people, yet a hug from her big brother still felt exactly the same every time.
When she finally pulled back, Noah turned to the woman beside him. “Bonnie, this is Addie. Addie, Bonnie.”
Addie’s blue eyes scrunched as she smiled. “Bonnie, I’ve heard so much about you.” She stepped forward and embraced her.
Bonnie hugged her back. “I’ve heard a lot about you too. It’s good to finally meet you.”
When Addie pulled away, she was still smiling. And Bonnie could see everything that had drawn her brother to the woman. There was a warmth in her. And when she smiled, it was with her entire face, including her eyes.
Noah studied Bonnie’s temple. “The bruise okay?”
“There’s barely a mark anymore.” It was true. How much time had passed? Two weeks? Enough for the bruise to almost disappear.
“And nothing else has happened since The Pit?” Noah asked.
“You know I would have told you if it had.”
He looked at her like he wasn’t sure if that was true. “Come on.”
They headed toward the entrance, and the closer they got to the door, the harder her heart beat against her ribs.
Why was she so nervous? This was her family.
But that wasn’t all it was. It was the history that they shared and she’d missed. Her family and the new lives they’d created were a reminder of everything she’d left behind.
They stepped inside the bar and surprisingly, the place wasn’t too full. Sure, it was busy. But compared to the bars in San Francisco, it was manageable.
Noah held Addie’s hand, but with his other, he touched the small of Bonnie’s back and led her toward two standing tables that had been pushed together.
She sucked in a sharp breath at the sight of everyone. Indie, Jesse, Becket, Clara. And all their partners.
Becket threw up his hands. “Bon-Bon! It’s been so damn long. Missed your favorite cousin?” He grinned and pulled her against his broad chest, and it was exactly what she needed to break the ice.
When Becket pulled back, he introduced her to Sky. Then Bonnie went around and greeted everyone before settling beside Indie with a can of Sun Cruiser.
“How are you settling back into Amber Ridge?” Clara asked from the other side of Indie.
“It’s different. There was no Tea House when I left, and I’d never stepped foot inside this bar, so I’m definitely feeling my age.”
Aspen, Jesse’s partner, sighed. “Thank God for Mrs. Gerald and her coffee. Half of us might have moved over to Bozeman otherwise.”
“What?” Jesse turned to his partner, shock on his face. “You would have left me for good coffee?”
She shrugged. “I would have called from Bozeman.”
Everyone laughed.
Over the next hour, Bonnie smiled more than she had in a long time. People talked and joked. She heard stories about the adventure park. About Sky’s doggy daycare and Aspen’s career as a writer.
It was good. No one mentioned her leaving thirteen years ago or her continued absence since. It just felt…normal.
“So,” Clara said, when people broke off into smaller conversations. “Glad to be home?”
“I am. There have been a few…challenges.” Challenges? Being assaulted and blatantly hated on felt like more than a challenge. “I should have come home sooner.”
“Why didn’t you?” Indie asked softly.
Bonnie looked at her sister, playing the question over in her head a few times before answering.
“I guess I was scared. I’d hurt so many people by leaving.
And the idea of coming back and facing it all just felt…
hard. Too hard to even consider tackling.
It was only when Noah reached out and talked to me like I wasn’t the worst person in the world that I thought… maybe I could do it.”
There was a moment of silence while both women just looked at her, empathy on their faces.
Then Indie touched her back. “I’m glad Noah reached out and made the move easier.”
“Me too. And good timing with my little niece or nephew on the way.”
Indie grinned and rubbed her belly. “Perfect timing. I’m gonna need someone to hand bubs off to when the smelly diaper changes are needed.”
They all laughed.
As the two women started talking baby names, Bonnie sipped her Cruiser, her gaze moving around the bar.
That’s when she spotted them…broad shoulders that almost made her choke on her drink.
Zane. Even from behind, she knew it was him. He sat at the bar beside a man whose shoulders looked just as wide.
She swallowed the liquid, memories of their last kiss flicking through her mind. Of his mouth on her body. The way he’d pinned her to the desk.
She flushed and dragged her gaze away, only for it to land smack dab on her brother beside her. And he was watching her closely.
“What?” she asked innocently.
“Are you dating him?”
“No. And by the way, he told me you paid him a visit.”
“You slept at his apartment. I was just looking out for you.”
Her brother didn’t look guilty at all. “You don’t need to do that. I am fully capable of looking after myself.”
“I know you are. I just want you to be happy.”
“I am.” Kind of. “And we’re not dating anyway, so it doesn’t matter.”
“Why not?”
“Why aren’t we dating?” She swung her focus to Zane for a second time. “Timing, I guess.”
It sounded as weak out loud as it did in her head. Timing was never perfect. Zane was the reason. Zane and his secret.
The second Noah turned away from her, her gaze returned to Zane.
What secrets are you hiding?
The question had flitted through her head so many times in the last week. It had to be big for him to continually pull away from her the way he was.
And if that message had been for him, it meant the secret was a dangerous one.
“There’s no way it was him.”
Zane’s fingers tightened around his beer, the music in the bar loud in his ear. “Are you sure?”
Ethan leaned closer. “He hasn’t left Montana State Prison.”
“He could have paid someone to do it.”
“It’s more likely that it was about her. You said the town doesn’t like her.”
“Yeah, there are a lot of assholes around here who’ve been making her life hell.” Understatement of the century.
“Why?”
“Her boyfriend got behind the wheel drunk. Crashed and killed himself thirteen years ago.”
“How’s that her fault?”
“It’s not. But according to locals, she was supposed to drive him home that night.”
“Small towns.” Ethan’s phone lit up, and he lifted it from the bar before cursing.
Zane frowned. “What’s wrong?”
“They’ve officially ended the search for the woman who went missing in the mountains.”
“That didn’t take long.”
“No. But it was longer than Ward wanted.”
Ward was the town sheriff of Deep River. He’d been useless twenty years ago, when Zane was a teenager, and apparently nothing had changed. “You already searched with the team?”
Ethan scoffed. “Our search and rescue team is made up of retired locals who have no idea what they’re doing. I’m the only one with a scrap of training.” He scrubbed a hand over his face. “If my team was there, we’d be scouring those mountains until we found her.”
Well, that was because there was a big damn difference between former Navy SEALs and retired librarians and shopkeepers.
“How’s your team doing?” Zane asked.
“No one really likes their jobs since getting out. And we miss each other. It’s hard to go from living in each other’s pockets to never seeing each other. It feels like I’m missing my left arm.”
“Shame you didn’t all move to the same town.”
Ethan laughed. “Yeah. Would have been nice.”
Someone stepped beside him at the bar. He knew who it was before he turned his head. From her scent. The warmth of her body.
“Bonnie.”
A small smile curved her lips. “Hey. I saw you across the bar and thought I’d come say hi.”
How the hell hadn’t he seen her? “Are you here alone?”
“I’m with my family.” Her smile softened as she glanced over her shoulder. “It feels good saying that.”
He followed her gaze to a couple of tables that were pushed together. Now that he was looking, it was hard to miss them.
Ethan reached out a hand across Zane. “I’m Ethan.”
Bonnie smiled and shook his hand, forcing Zane to lean back. “Bonnie. Are you local?”
“No, I’m from Deep River, two hours south of here.”
“That’s quite a drive.”
“Zane’s a childhood friend. He’s worth it…most of the time.”
“I grew up in Deep River,” Zane added. “Lived there with my grandmother for most of my life.” Why the hell had he gone and added that? Because he wanted her to know more about him?
“I didn’t know you were raised by your grandmother,” she said softly.
“It’s why he’s such a gentleman,” Ethan added with a laugh.
Zane shoved his shoulder.
Bonnie grinned. “What’s it like in Deep River?”
Zane lifted a shoulder. “Similar to here, but also different.”
“We’re near Yellowstone National Park and known for the large river that cuts through our town,” Ethan said.
“They also have a hard time moving into the twenty-first century,” Zane added.
Ethan dipped his head. “It’s true. Our town has one bar, which hasn’t changed since the eighties. Still has its old-school TV and karaoke. We have a town square, where all the older women congregate and gossip. And a community center with bingo and dances.”
“That sounds—” Someone bumped her hard from behind.
All three of them turned to see a woman standing behind her.
Bonnie frowned. “Maisie?”
The woman’s eyes were glazed. “Bonnie! M’sorry, I didn’t see you there. But I’m glad I do now!” Her words slurred, and she threw her arms around Bonnie, but she didn’t return the hug.
“Are you drunk?” Bonnie asked
She held up two pinched fingers. “A teeny-tiny bit.” She cocked her head. “You know, I’ve been meanin’ to tell you it’s really cool of you to not tell anyone what happened that night. People could’ve turned on me like they turned on you.”
“You should go home.” There wasn’t a hint of a smile on Bonnie’s face. “Sleep off the alcohol.”
“Wait! I need to tell you something first. Something I’ve been hangin’ on to for a long time.” The woman’s chest rose as she sucked in a deep breath. “It wasn’t the first time I fucked him. We’d been having sex for a while. Two years kinda while. God, it’s good to get that out.”
Bonnie’s lips thinned. “I have to go, Maisie.”
She stepped around the woman, only for a guy to walk straight up to her—and tip the entire contents of his beer onto her face and shirt.
The fuck?
Bonnie gasped while the guy laughed. “Whoops.”
Zane was in front of her in a second, grabbing the piece of shit by his shirt collar and shoving him against the bar. “What the hell is wrong with you?”
“Get off me!”
Zane lowered his face. “Apologize to her.”
“The fuck I will! Dean was my friend.”
Zane spun him to face the bar and pulled his arm behind his back so high his shoulder twisted.
“Ow! Fuck. Get off!”
Zane lowered his head to the man’s ear. “You have three seconds to apologize before I dislocate your shoulder.”
A beat of silence passed before he growled, “Fine. I’m sorry.”
“Not loud enough.” Zane pulled him up and turned him to face Bonnie. “Again.”
Bonnie was soaking wet, but she now had people around her. Her family. Indie on one side, and another woman on her other.
Another loud pause. “I’m sorry,” he repeated through gritted teeth.
“Do it again and you will be.” Zane released the asshole.
The guy looked at Jesse. “You gonna do anything?”
Jesse turned to Bonnie. “You want to press charges for assault?”
The asshole’s jaw dropped.
Bonnie shook her head. “Not this time. But if it happens again, I will.”
The guy’s jaw remained open like a fucking gaping fish maw.
The women shuffled her out, but rage still burned through Zane’s blood. He wanted to follow the guy into the crowd. Really teach him a lesson.
And maybe he would have. But Ethan rose and set a hand on Zane’s shoulder. “Leave it, brother.”
He forced air through his lungs. For now, he would. But he was getting tired of this town’s poor treatment of Bonnie. So damn tired that soon, walking away wouldn’t be an option.