14. Connor
CONNOR
“ O of.” I rub the spot on my chest where Brad just threw a fucking basketball at me.
“Pay attention, man.”
I shake my head, picking the ball up and throwing it back to him.
Obviously, I know Scout gets priority with Elliot. She’s his best friend and he made it pretty fucking clear he only wants to hook up with me. Casual. No strings or whatever. But it still sucked, reading that text.
I want to see him. If Scout wasn’t such a gremlin about me hanging out with them, I’d be happy to just tag along. I don’t need to be hooking up with Eli to enjoy being with him.
“Brad, you got any plans tonight?”
“Nope, why?”
“Wanna have a drink at the arcade bar?”
He shrugs before tossing the ball in the net. “Sure.”
We used to be obsessed with this place when we were growing up.
Nothing’s changed since the last time we were here.
The bar is still on the far side and most of the huge space is taken up by retro video games and pinball machines.
There are some modern games like Dance Mania, which Scout almost killed herself getting the high score on.
I’m disgustingly sweaty by the time we make it across the main space and into the bar. What the fuck am I doing? Elliot’s gonna think I’m a psycho. But I’m here now. It’ll be weird if I tell Brad I wanna leave before we’ve even ordered a drink.
Have one drink, then suggest you go somewhere else. Maybe you’ll avoid seeing Elliot and save face.
Brad orders us both a beer while I scan the arcade for any sign of Eli and my growly sister. I shouldn’t be so disappointed when I fail to spot them.
We take a seat in front of a screen showing highlights from the previous day’s football game.
“So, how do you like being home? Missing California yet?”
Definitely not missing California. I put on a fake smile and sip my beer before answering. “Nah. It’s good being home, but I’ll be happy to leave for the sun when the weather gets bad here.”
Brad nods, taking a sip of his beer.
Am I really talking about the weather? What did we talk about before I left for school?
We were eighteen, so it was probably juvenile shit.
Some girl we were dating—or wanted to date—or the scores of last night’s Islander’s game.
How many friends do I actually have who I can have a real conversation with outside of Eli?
“How’s Heather?” I ask .
I try to listen while he talks, but I can’t stop looking into the arcade for Elliot. Where the fuck is he?
We’ve almost finished our beers. I’m about to stick to my plan, suggest we go somewhere else, when I spot my sister’s curly hair in the crowd. She turns around and laughs at something someone says. That’s when I spot Eli. My heart instantly starts pounding and my palms get unbearably sweaty.
He looks sexy as fuck in his glasses, his hair styled so it’s messy, but in a cute way. He runs his hand through it a little self-consciously as he walks beside Scout, glancing at the games and wearing a tight smile.
They’re with a group of people I’ve never seen before. I didn’t know Scout had friends outside of Elliot. Are they Elliot’s friends?
A guy with a douchey haircut puts his hand on Elliot’s shoulder and smiles at him in a way I recognize. He’s looking at Elliot the way I look at Elliot.
Is this Cute Bookstore Guy? Is he going out with him again?
“Is that Scout?” Brad asks, following my gaze. “Wanna go say hi?”
Yes, I want to go over there and get between Eli and that bookstore jerk. But I’m not even supposed to be here. He made it very fucking clear he wanted to keep things casual. I turn back to the TV and try to tune into the sports highlights.
“Nah, you know what she’s like.”
Brad laughs. “Don’t tell her this, but she scares me.”
“She’s all bark.”
“I don’t know, she definitely tried to bite me once when we were kids.”
Before I can down the rest of my beer and get out of there, Brad winces. I glance over my shoulder. Scout and Elliot are heading our way. Brad bumps my shoulder sympathetically.
“Looks like we don’t have a choice.”
I note my sister’s scowl as she approaches us. It makes my heart sink. I don’t want my baby sister to hate me. I know hooking up with her best friend isn’t exactly gonna rectify that. Extra reason why I should get the hell out of here.
But then Bookstore Guy puts his hand on Elliot’s shoulder again, like he fucking owns him, and my stubborn ass stays where it is.
“What are you doing here?” Scout asks when she gets close to our table.
I nod to the TV. “Watching the highlights and having a beer. What are you doing?”
“We’re gonna hang out before we go to a gig later.”
“Hi, Scout,” Brad says.
Scout turns her glare on him and he shrinks.
The group they came in with have spread out, some of them heading to the bar, a couple hanging back to watch the exchange.
They all look like scruffy art students.
They’re in band tees and ugly cardigans.
One guy has his hair in a curly mullet. A girl who looks like she cuts her own bangs introduces herself as Ophelia.
“Who’s this?” Ophelia asks.
“This is my brother,” Scout says.
“Do you want to join us? We could really use another pair for air hockey.”
Brad slaps me on the shoulder. “This guy’s awesome at hockey.”
I grit my teeth and keep smiling.
“Great!” Ophelia beams.
All this time, I’ve been forcing myself not to look at Elliot. When I finally glance around for him, I find him standing at the bar, next to that guy.
I hop off my stool and sidle close enough to my sister to ask her something without being overheard.
“Is that the bookstore guy with Eli?”
“Yeah, his name’s Gabe.”
I take a moment for the confirmation to sink in. Okay, this is fine. I can handle this.
“I’m getting a drink, what do you want?”
She smirks up at me. “Get me a Shirley Temple.”
I nod, barely taking in what she said. When I get to the bar, I stand next to Elliot. Gabe is on his right.
I wish I could push him out of the way, but that would definitely not be okay. I order two beers and a Shirley Temple before turning to Elliot and asking if he wants a Sprite.
He bites his lip and looks down at the full glass of lemonade sitting on the bar in front of him. “No, I’m good, thanks.”
Gabe got him a drink, fine.
They walk away together. I get our drinks before following them.
The group has set themselves up around the air hockey game, the first pair facing off.
I keep trying to catch Elliot’s eye. I don’t want him to think I’m crazy for coming here tonight when I knew he was gonna be here.
I listen in on the group conversation, especially whatever this Gabe guy says to Elliot. He’s talking about books. I pick up a Proust reference and am reminded of the time a guy at college made fun of me for pronouncing it wrong. Gabe pronounces it right, of course.
Gabe talks with that haughty air of all young, pretentious people who believe their opinions are so fucking profound and haven’t learned that they’re cringey yet. I could be imagining it, but Elliot looks embarrassed.
He and Scout like some pretentious stuff, but their conversations are nothing like this.
They gush over Cher and do Yoda impressions in between the artsy, smart stuff.
More importantly, Elliot is humble and open minded.
When I told him I didn’t understand Dostoyevsky that day by the pool, he didn’t get all snobbish about it and use it as an excuse to show off.
He leveled with me, told me he sometimes didn’t understand it either, which was a lie, even if it was a kind lie.
He called out gatekeeping academics and quoted a silly line he probably found on Pinterest. He’s way too good for this guy.
I finally get my chance to talk to him alone when he breaks off from the group and heads to the men’s bathrooms.
Before I miss the opportunity, I put my beer down and follow him.
“Listen, I’m sorry,” I say as soon as I walk into the bathroom.
Eli’s standing in front of the urinal, about to unzip. He stops when he sees me.
“What are you doing here? Do you want Scout to catch us?”
“No … I just, fuck.” I rub the back of my neck, feeling out of control and hating it.
Elliot lowers his eyes to his shoes. “Listen, I’m sorry, too. I didn’t want to come here with Gabe, I just didn’t know how to turn him down without hurting his feelings, and then Scout?—”
“Wait, you guys aren’t on a date? ”
Elliot shakes his head. “At least, I didn’t mean it to be. I hate sneaking around, I feel like a total sleazebag.”
My stomach drops. “Do you want to stop hooking up?”
His eyes burn into me, and it’s like he’s superimposing all the images of us together into me. My whole body heats up when I think about the way he moans when I’m inside him, how he bites his lip and how his eyes roll when he comes.
I take a tentative step closer and stroke the side of his hand.
He shakes his head. “No, I don’t want to stop.”
I bring my other hand up to cup his face. Run my fingers through his hair like I’ve wanted to since the second I saw him walk in with that other guy. His eyelids flutter as my fingers tangle in his hair.
I can’t help myself any longer, I bend down enough to kiss him. He accepts it with a soft groan.
My hand still tangled in his hair, I press myself closer to him while I slip my tongue in his mouth, not caring that I’m hard as fuck and will need to calm down before I go back out there and face my sister and a bunch of strangers.
A noise forces us apart. When I turn around, Gabe is standing there, staring at us with wide eyes. He definitely just saw us making out.
He splutters something unintelligible before rushing out of the bathroom again.
“Shit,” Eli says, brushing past me to go after him.
I follow. I’m pretty sure this guy isn’t gonna hurt Eli, but I won’t take any chances. When I get out there, Gabe’s rejoined the group. I try to pull Eli aside, but before I can get to him, Scout's shouting, “Connor, Gabe challenges you to a dual.”
I turn to her, confused. “A what? ”