13. 2-For-1 Special
CHAPTER
ADAM
I can’t remember
a time anyone has looked at me the way Rosie does.
Courtney did, once upon a time, but it’s almost impossible to look back on our early years together and imagine that it was ever real, even back when we were seventeen and she looked at me like I hung the stars.
But with Rosie…I’m not the stars, lighting bits of her sky.
I’m the rising sun on the clearest day, touching every inch of her world, lighting the bleakest, darkest parts where she hasn’t seen light in far too long.
She looks at me like I’m everything good and bright.
She looks at me like she’s…grateful. Grateful to be here with me.
Grateful for the patience, for the understanding, for every kindness and every smile.
It’s nearly painful how heavy the weight of her stare is.
Because I know, even on our best days, the way Courtney used to look at me could never compare, and it makes me feel a little…empty. It feels like wasted years and dashed dreams. Like bitter winters that outstayed their welcome, a spring that took far too long to come.
It’s painful because for everything Rosie’s given me, no matter how small or how hesitantly, I haven’t done her the same. She gets the pieces that come easily, the ones that don’t hurt, and I keep all the others in my fist, grasping them tight against my chest, afraid of what she’ll do with them.
And that’s the thing. When I met Courtney, I had everything I dreamed of.
An incredible family who loved me endlessly, a promising career as a goalie in the NHL on the horizon.
I was happy and carefree. Courtney had my bright spots, and they weren’t enough.
I let her steal everything good and bright and happy, one tiny handful at a time.
My confidence, my trust, my faith in happy endings.
I don’t think it’s wrong to make someone your whole world, but I know the one time I’ve done it, it was my greatest mistake.
I know now that Courtney wasn’t the world meant for me, but that doesn’t make it easier to consider starting a new one with someone else, someone who has the power to break you all over again.
I want to jump in headfirst. Fuck, I tell myself I’m already doing it, that I’ve never fallen so fast, started dreaming of a future with someone I barely know.
But the reality is like rope tied around my ankles, letting me shuffle down the road I want to go, but each small step burns into my skin, urging me to slow down, to just… wait. Just in case.
I survived the first time, but will I survive a second?
The look in Rosie’s eyes as she watches me splash around the pool with her son in my arms tells me there’s nothing to survive. That she won’t be the one to break me. The fissures in my chest whisper… but what if?
Connor wiggles in my grasp, reaching toward the steps.
I know exactly where this is going; we’ve been doing it for the last forty minutes.
I swim us to the edge and he scrambles up the steps.
He rounds the patio on quick feet, stopping to take Bear’s face in his little hands.
“Hi, big dog,” he says before pressing a kiss to his forehead.
“Mama,” Connor coos, patting her knee. “Mama!”
“I’m watching, baby. Are you going to jump to Adam?”
“Dada!”
I stifle a laugh at the horror painting Rosie’s face, even though Connor’s called me this about five hundred times today.
“I’m so sorry,” she whispers. “Google says it’s a phase.”
I only wink, then reach toward Connor as he crouches down. “Ready to jump, little trouble?”
“Tubble,” he repeats with a toothy grin. Tiny hands reach toward me, and when he launches himself off the patio and into my arms, he shrieks, “ Daaa-daaa
!”
I twirl him in the air before dunking his bottom half while he squeals with delight. He clings to my chest, little legs wrapping around me as he giggles against my neck, and Rosie can’t take her eyes off us.
“Should we splash Mama?” I wade closer to Rosie, hiding my smile. “What do you think, buddy? Does Mama need to get a little wet?”
She points a finger at me. “Don’t you dare. I’ve been wet, now I’m dry.” She curls her daisy-painted toes into Bear’s fur. “Bear and I like it this way.”
“Mmm. Mama doesn’t like being wet.” The furious heat pooling in Rosie’s cheeks says she doesn’t miss the innuendo, but we don’t have time to dwell on it as I help Connor up the steps again. “Go give Mama a big
hug. Squeeze all your love into her.”
Tiny feet tear across the patio, grabby hands reaching for his mom. She shrieks with laughter as he hurls his wet body into her lap, and I think they might be my favorite people in the world.
Water droplets cascade down my body, splattering on the concrete as I walk toward them. I grab a towel, watching Rosie’s eyes move over me on a slow, heated sweep, tongue running aimlessly across her bottom lip as I shake out my hair, her throat bobbing as I rub the towel across my stomach.
“I’m gonna start the barbecue and get dinner going.”
Rosie doesn’t blink, gaze roaming down, then up.
I nudge her chin with two knuckles, guiding her eyes to mine. “’Kay, pretty girl?”
“Hot,” she murmurs, then blinks rapidly, shaking her head. “Barbecue, I mean. It’s…hot. It’ll be hot. When you…start it.” She nods. “Yes.”
I drop my smile to her forehead, wink at Connor, and head inside. My phone’s buzzing on my kitchen counter, my favorite group of Puck Sluts checking in.
Carter
did the car seat work ok?
Garrett
What car seat?
Carter
im talking 2 adam, not u.
Garrett
Fine, I’ll go back to what I was doing before. Your sister.
Carter
u motherfucker
Emmett
Believe the correct term is sisterfucker, bud.
Jaxon
*crying laughing emoji* Sisterfucker. Get it? Cuz he’s fucking ur sister.
Carter
I fucking hate u all. i’m only talking to adam from now on.
did the car seat work for ur girlfriend???
Garrett
…How old is Rosie?
Emmett
Wait wait wait…*monocle emoji*
Carter
it’s not for rosie, u turds.
Garrett
I thought you weren’t talking to us.
Jaxon
*thinking emoji*
Carter
…
Jaxon
*surprised emoji* No. No no no no.
Carter
yes.
Jaxon
*melting emoji* Adam, buddy. Tell me she doesn’t have a kid.
Garrett
Jennie awww’d so long I stopped counting.
Emmett
Cara says ‘Stepdaddy Adam??? Man just went from a 10/10 to a solid 20.’
Jaxon
ADAM. Tell me it isn’t so.
Me
His name is Connor, he’s fifteen months old, and he’s cute as fuck.
Jaxon
NOOOOO. Daddy Adam?! RIP.
Emmett
Ayooo! That’s awesome, bud. Happy for you.
Carter
keep him away from my baby cuz no boys til she’s 40.
or ever.
no girls either.
I’m not going to attempt to touch on the fact that one day Ireland will grow up and be her own person and not ever listen to her dad again, because it’s a useless conversation.
Carter’s go-to when anyone tries to reason with him involves slapping his hands over his ears and singing I’m not listening, I’m not listening
.
In fact, Ireland may grow up before he does.
My phone rings, and I half expect it to be Jaxon. Commitment scares him, and the thought of a toddler probably has him spiraling. If anyone’s going to try to talk me out of this relationship, it’ll be him.
But my mom’s face smiles up at me from my screen, and I answer the video request as I shuffle out of earshot of the patio door, to the living room window, where I can see Rosie, Connor, and Bear playing in the grass with the sprinkler.
“Hey, Mom.”
“Care to tell me why Garrett told me you have a girlfriend before you did?”
“I don’t—what—when were you—” I scrub my eyes and sigh. “That little shit.”
“Don’t blame my angel.” Garrett is definitely her favorite of my friends, which is why she sends him a monthly box of specialty snacks from the States that you can’t get here in Canada.
“He called to thank me for his snacks and asked if I was excited to meet Rosie. I said, ‘Rosie who?’ and he said, ‘Oh, shit.’ Then Jennie started cackling in the background and chanting, ‘You fucked up, you fucked up.’”
“She’s not my girlfriend,” I mumble. “I haven’t even kissed her yet.”
“Well, that’s understandable.”
“It is?”
“Yeah, of course.”
There’s a snicker in the background, and then my dad’s amused face pops over Mom’s shoulder. “If someone publicly rated my kissing a three out of five, I’d be hesitant to kiss anyone ever again too.”
They howl with laughter, and the fuckers even high-five. “Nailed it, Deac!”
I smile as Connor bounds after Bear, and Rosie after Connor, the three of them soaked to the bone as they leap through the spraying water.
“Oh my God,” Mom murmurs. “He’s in love.”
“I am not.” I might be.
Well on the way, at the least. “Look, I gotta go. She’s here right now, and I’m supposed to be starting the barb—”
“She’s there? Right now? Introduce us!”
“Absolutely not.”
Her dark brows pull way down. “Deacon, make your son introduce us.”
Dad rips open a Fruit Roll-Up, and now I want one, so I grab one too. “Adam, listen to your mother so I don’t have to, blah blah blah, happy wife, happy life.”
I stifle a laugh at the look she gives him, and when Connor squeals with laughter, my mom’s jaw dangles, and I pause, my rainbow treat hanging in front of my open mouth.
“Is that a…a baby?”
I stuff my Fruit Roll-Up in my mouth. “Toddler, technically. Connor is fifteen months old.”
She turns to look at my dad, sniffling. “Deacon, we’re gonna be grandparents.”
“For fuck’s sake.” I knew this would happen. “I just told you I haven’t even kissed her!”
“Well, what are you waiting for? And make it good, so she wants to keep you! None of that half-assed, three out of five bullshit!” She snickers at the look of pure exhaustion on my face. “Can you tell us a little bit about her? Just quick. Then we’ll hang up and leave you alone. Promise.”