Chapter 14
FOURTEEN
Devyn stared up at me, her bright brown eyes locked onto mine in confusion. But after the longest pause in modern history, she ripped her hands from my chest and laughed, full-on belly laughs like I was the most ridiculous thing in the world.
“ Me ?” she squealed. “Stay here ? Why the hell would I stay here?”
Good question , one I hadn’t really put a lot of thought into. I was acting on pure impulse. Ever since I saw Devyn’s belongings piled up in the corner behind the couch, I’d been trying to keep myself in check, knowing Devyn wouldn’t respond well to my anger.
I moved closer to her, noticing how her eyes widened as I approached. So maybe this feeling wasn’t as one-sided as I thought. Being around her ignited a fire in my chest, one that had died down but had never fully gone out. Every part of her called to me, like a craving I couldn’t satisfy. From her long blonde hair draped along her back to her plump bottom lip, all I wanted to do was lock the doors and explore every inch of her .
How the hell had I spent so long denying what I felt for her? Even when we were kids, I knew she was beautiful, but there was something so much more to her. She was the moon, constantly orbiting in my atmosphere. I’d spent enough time trying to ignore her pull.
Devyn must have noticed me zoning out, because she stepped closer, waving her hand in my face. “Grayson Anders, do you hear me?”
“No,” I said, walking back over to the door to grab the spare set of keys. “You need a place to stay, and I have one. Seems simple to me.”
“I have a place to stay.”
“And now you have a better one.”
Devyn threw her arms up in the air. “This is why I didn’t want anyone to tell you. I knew you’d bulldoze back into my life and try to fix things for me. Well, newsflash, Grayson: I’m not sixteen anymore. I do not need or want you to save me.”
“Too fucking bad,” I snapped, stepping closer to her. “Like it or not, we’re married, Devyn, and I’ll be damned if my wife sleeps on a couch when I have a perfectly functional house she can use.”
Her eyes flashed for a moment, but she quickly shuttered the emotion. “Calla’s place will be fine. It’s only for a couple of weeks.”
“And you think you’ll last that long? I can’t imagine it’s been fun sharing 1,000 square feet with your sister and her husband.”
“And their paper-thin walls,” Devyn mumbled before scrubbing her hand over her face. “Okay, it might not be the ideal setup, but like I said, it’s temporary.”
“So is this,” I shrugged. “But at least here, you’ll have some privacy. ”
Devyn stared at me, her mouth agape. “I am not staying with you, Grayson. That will never happen.”
“I’m not staying here,” I answered. “I’ve been crashing at my parents. They need the help. This would all be yours.”
Devyn’s mouth fell open and then closed, but even without words, I could see her brain working in overdrive, trying to figure out an excuse to turn down my offer. She was stubborn, I’d give her that, but I was always worse. As she stared up at me, I just stood there, hoping she’d say yes. Other than for the reasons I’d already stated, I didn’t know why I wanted her here so badly. But I needed her here; I needed to know she was safe and content. Devyn never needed anyone, but if she did, I wanted to be the one she called.
She looked around the room, chewing on her lower lip. I almost had her. Devyn walked over to the window, sighing as she looked outside. “I’m paying rent.”
“No, you’re not,” I said. “I bought this place outright. There’s no mortgage. I don’t owe anything on it. And trust me, I don’t need your money.” I walked over to her. “Save it for yourself.”
She looked over her shoulders, and her lips pursed into a tight line. “I don’t need your charity.”
I snorted. “That’s not what this is, Dev. I know you better than that. This is me helping a friend.”
“We’re not friends,” Devyn snapped.
“Fine,” I grumbled, rubbing my hand over my beard. “Look at it this way. You need a chance to catch your breath and figure out your next steps. I need someone here so I don’t have to worry about all my hard work turning to shit in the cold weather, and you know I’m not letting a stranger into my home.” I shrugged, trying to come off more casual than I felt. “This helps out both of us.”
She turned, taking in the room again. As she looked it all over, I stared at her. She was still so familiar yet different at the same time. Her long blonde hair was tied up in a ponytail, and it swung along her back as she walked around my space. Her slight fingers trailed across the back of my couch, tracing the leather. It was hard not to flinch, not to explain everything I had picked and why, to just let her explore, knowing her dark brown eyes always saw more than I wanted.
When I bought this house two years ago, I never meant for it to be my main home. I always expected to stay in the city or maybe settle into something in the suburbs right outside Manhattan, but life had a funny way of showing you what you needed, and it led me right back here. From the moment I found this place, I knew it could be something special with some money and effort.
But it never felt like home until Devyn stepped inside. I ran my hand over my face, trying to get my shit together. Even if she did decide to stay here, she’d made it clear she didn’t want anything to do with me. I should have taken her at her word, but I couldn’t help but hope she changed her mind. From the moment Devyn came back into my life, I wanted more. Craved what we used to have. I couldn’t help myself when it came to her. Devyn was as much a part of me as the scars on my hands and knees.
After a long moment, she finally turned back toward me and said, “I need to think about it.”
“That’s all I ask.”
I dropped Devyn back off at Calla’s and then immediately headed to the Lost Tavern. Since my dad had been having more episodes at night, I’d taken over dinner service for my mom, making sure my phone was nearby just in case.
After parking my truck in the back lot, I walked inside, waving hi to the bar regulars. The restaurant wasn’t big, but my dad had wisely divided it into two sections years ago. The front was an aged bar, the walls lined with wooden panels. The back was a bright dining room, trading the wooden planks for light bricks and other rustic accents. Although there had been a lot of updates over the years, the general feel of the place always remained the same, a testament to my parents' hard work. It was comfortable, the kind of place people came regularly, both for simple meals and to celebrate life events. A lot had happened behind the doors of the Lost Tavern, and I was honored to be a part of its history.
I checked in with Maggie, our general manager, before heading into the back. I flicked on the light in the back room before turning toward my desk, where I found a neat pile of receipts waiting for me. My mother must have stopped by after I left to get Devyn. I looked over her notes as I pulled off my jacket and draped it over the back of my chair.
A couple of the servers popped in as I worked, but they kept to themselves. My team was good about giving me space while I was trying to work, even though we all shared the same area. Due to a lack of space, the restaurant’s office was combined with the storeroom, laundry room, and break room. It was narrow but decently sized and ran along the length of the restaurant wall.
In the far corner, my dad had set up a small desk before he opened. Over the years, he’d always talked about getting a better setup, but we knew that was all talk. He hated being confined to an office, preferring to bring his work to the bar so he could chat with patrons while checking in on everything. He prided himself on serving the community and wanted everyone to leave with a pleasant experience.
It was hard to imagine what the restaurant looked like when my dad first started. He’d poured his whole heart into making this place something special, and you could feel it every time you walked inside. The Lost Tavern was his legacy, and even though I never thought I’d work here, it was an honor to continue his work.
Forcing my dad out of my thoughts, I filed away the receipts and turned on the computer. It had to be a decade old; they hadn’t replaced it since I was in high school, but luckily, it worked most of the time. I leaned back in the chair, twiddling my thumbs as I waited for it to boot up. All I needed was to finish the week’s orders before I could head to the dining room.
And the scheduling.
And shit, I needed to grab my dad’s medication.
The cursor blinked at me on the screen, and suddenly, everything overwhelmed me. My dad, Devyn being back in town, all the things I tried to keep buried suddenly pressing down on me, leaving me depleted. I leaned forward, and my elbows dropped to my thighs. I cradled my face in my hands as anxiety raced through me, reminding me of all the ways I was failing everyone around me. It was too much.
As the sounds blurred and my vision turned black, a sudden noise broke through my haze. The concurrent pings of an incoming text pulled me out of my spiral, and the room came back into view. I inhaled slowly, reminding myself of my surroundings: the receipts, computer, Dad’s old Rebels mug. Each slow, steady breath helped center me. Eventually, my hands relaxed, releasing their tight grip.
I pulled the phone off the desk and found an unknown New York City area code had texted me. Curiosity got the best of me, so I opened the chat.
UNKNOWN NUMBER
Hey…it’s Devyn.
Sorry. Don’t know if this is okay, but I got your number from Calla.
I couldn’t help but smile. Devyn had texted me. Jesus, this was ridiculous. You would have thought I’d just won the lottery with how that made me feel. But each step with Devyn was a battle, and her reaching out felt like my first major win since she’d come back into town.
Another text came in as I was debating what to write back.
UNKNOWN NUMBER
Never mind, forget it. Momentary lapse of judgment.
Wait. Was Devyn nervous? She was rambling, which was usually a sign she was. Maybe that shouldn’t have felt good, but I liked that talking to me affected her. I leaned back in my chair, my panic receding as I stared at her messages.
ME
Hey, Devy.
Glad you texted. What’s up?
As three dots appeared on the screen, I saved her number, unable to resist labeling it with her old nickname.
ACE
About earlier…I never thanked you for the offer
ME
You don’t have to thank me, but you should take me up on it.
That’s actually why I’m texting…
Does it still stand?
The house is yours for as long as you need.
Thank you, Gray.
Stop thanking me. You’re helping me out just as much.
Trust me, that’s not true.
Came back and found Calla and Theo in a compromising position in the kitchen.
There are some things you can’t ever unsee.
So, if you’re cool with it, can I start moving things in tomorrow? After I bleach my eyeballs, of course.
I stared at the chat and suddenly needed to hear her voice. Pressing her contact information, I brought the phone up to my ear and listened to the line trill.
“Please tell me you haven’t changed your mind already,” Devyn grumbled on the second ring. “I’ve already started packing.”
“Nah,” I said. “Just hate texting.”
Devyn laughed, the sound lighter than I remembered. She wasn’t someone who showed her emotions easily, often hiding them behind a tough facade. But those little moments when I got to see the real her? Those were everything.
“Should have remembered that,” Devyn chuckled. “You’ve always been technology averse.”
For a moment, I thought about telling her the truth: I just wanted to hear her voice. After being starved of it for so long, I was desperate to talk to her, to listen to all her thoughts. Even when she was annoyed with me, it was better than not talking to her at all. I chuckled, keeping all that to myself. “Not as bad as I used to be.”
“Good to know,” Devyn sighed. “Because if you didn’t have cable or Wi-Fi at your house, this whole deal might have been off. Calla’s got me hooked on all these reality shows, and now I’m just as addicted. If I miss a Real Housewives reunion, there will be blood.”
I laughed, the sound filling the room. “Don’t you worry, Ace. I’ve got both set up for you. No need to get blood on my new rug.”
The line paused, and for a moment, I thought she was going to ream me out for calling her Ace. I’d done it a couple of times today already. The first time was a slip of the tongue. It was too easy to fall into old habits with Devyn as if no time had passed. But after that, I was almost testing the waters, waiting to see if she’d say anything about the nickname. Each time she let it go only emboldened me, wanting to know how much further she’d let me in.
She cleared her throat. “I should get going. I want to make sure I have everything ready for tomorrow. Can we meet at the house at 10?”
“Works for me.”
“Cool…” she sighed. “I’ll see you then.”
Disappointment filled me at how our conversation ended, hating we’d only talked for a couple of minutes before I ruined it. But before I could pull the phone away from my ear, I heard her voice call out. “Thank you, Gray.”
I smiled to myself. “Stop thanking me, Devyn. It’s not needed.”
“Yes, it is,” she insisted. “There aren’t many people who’d do something like that for me. Just Calla, maybe Laurel, and they’re obligated because they’re my sisters. But you…” Her voice trailed off, and I wished more than anything she’d finish the thought. I needed to know where her head was and how she felt about being around me again. She cleared her throat. “So thank you, Gray. It means more than you know.”
“Anything for you, Devy.”