Chapter 22
22
Who is this man I’m becoming? Save me a ride on the Ferris wheel? What am I? Seventeen? Why the hell did I say that?
I told myself I wouldn’t say anything to Ava anymore that I wouldn’t say to Debbie. But when she said she’d be going with Callum and some of the guys, I thought about the pool again, and the possessive, protective part of me took hold.
I excuse the corny move because me spending time with her at the fair means I’m doing what I said I’d do. After the pool incident, I told myself I’d keep an eye on her and I know how well I did that from afar that evening. I don’t want to be ten feet back in an environment like that. Too much mayhem. Too many hands. Beers flowing freely with the boys.
No. It’s better if I’m by her side where I can make sure she’s safe and no other prick in this town touches her. Not until I genuinely know she’s safe from whatever this is lurking behind her. After she tells me everything, I can stand down. And after I don’t want her so badly for myself.
It’s not my place to think that way. I’ll need to get over this. I will. Eventually.
I can already imagine time with her in a place like a fair. If she sparkles at the mere warmth of the sunshine soaking into her back on a horse ride, she will radiate at a place like the fair. What most people take for granted, Ava savors. It’s almost like she never got a chance to live before, which has my mind wandering to her problem.
Maybe she didn’t get to live. Maybe she ran from an abusive relationship. Maybe she saw something she shouldn’t have and someone needs her gone. Since working at GhostEye, and even with witness protection, I’ve seen it all. I know she’s hiding. I just need to figure out from whom.
Since I told her my story, her amber eyes have shifted. I feel she’s closer to me now and I laugh to myself thinking Santi was actually right about something. I gave some trust first, and it’s changed things for the better. I think she’ll tell me soon. In the meantime, I’ve seen as much as I need to know she’s not here to cause trouble at GhostEye. In fact, she may just be its savior.
For one night, we both need to breathe easy. It’s been stressful to say the least, trying to find the source of the hacks together and at the same time feeling like there’s some ticking time bomb in the background. For the hacks as much as my sense of urgency to help her.
But tomorrow, I intend to treat her to some relaxation. I can already see her on top of that Ferris wheel. She’ll breathe deeply the way she does as if inhaling a dozen roses. She might even close her eyes, something she does when she’s trying to experience life fully. She’ll love it, and I can already envision her bright smile and gorgeous lips spreading into a Hollywood smile.
I love making her smile.
It makes me want to do it, too, and it’s not exactly my MO.
I feel more alive around her, even more now since I was able to tell her about Diego. A weight has lifted off my shoulders sharing that with someone who seems to understand.
Maybe we can be friends, though the thought of that somehow feels like settling for second place.
The next day doesn’t come fast enough. Dad, Santi, and I walk through the crowds of people and clouds of blue cotton candy.
We’re headed to the dunk tank where Santi has been eagerly leading us in between pit stops for Dad to pick up cream puffs, popcorn, or frankly whatever food is on offer.
I can see the tank just ahead when Dad gets lured in yet again by the aroma of something sweet in a stall. “Hold on… manzanas acarameladas …” He rubs his hands together. “Just a little taste test…”
“Dad,” Santi complains, “if you eat one more thing, we’re going to have to roll you out of here.”
“I can get one to go.” He heads to the table to inspect the various flavors of toffee apples.
I take the opportunity to scan every passerby and face behind giant stuffed animals, searching for Ava.
A sly smile spreads on my brother’s face from under his cowboy hat. “Looking for Red? ”
He doesn’t wait for an answer.
“Why don’t you just admit you’re down hard for her and go for it?” he asks.
This conversation is apparently more interesting than caramel apples, and Dad’s gaze turns on me, eyes widening with the same question.
“She’s too young for me, one. Works for me for, two.”
“So the fuck what?” Santi shrugs. “You don’t have a no-fraternizing policy.”
I’m surprised he has that information. “How do you know?”
He slaps Dad on the arm. “He checked.”
It’s Dad’s turn to shrug. “What? You two would be cute together. I wanted to see if it was legal or whatever.”
I roll my eyes.
“What are you worried about? Your reputation?” He says it like it’s ridiculous.
“I won’t be some predator abusing my power.”
Santi’s laugh is thick with suggestion. “Are you really a predator when your prey is spreading herself out like a buffet?”
“Santi…” Dad warns.
My brother ignores him. “Seriously. Do you even notice the way she looks at you? Trust me, Little Red Riding Hood is trying to get the Big Bad Wolf’s attention. You’re a goddamn fool for not chasing that. I get being professional and wanting to keep your employees’ respect, but nobody at GhostEye really even knows her. Or you. You’re barely at the offices. I doubt you giving it a try with Ava would even turn heads. Hell, probably only Rio would know.”
Maybe Santi is right. Maybe tonight, I should just ride that Ferris wheel and see where it takes us. It’s not against the rules. Rio insisted we didn’t write that policy, but in my own moral code, I chose to follow it anyway. That was easy before Ava showed up.
Santi glances at his watch. “Bran said he’d be in the tank at eight.”
I’m happy to drop the conversation and to find Ava.
Without another word, we head off in that direction.
The tank is three stalls away. There are people everywhere, kids weaving through legs and teenage boys shoving each other, bumping into passersby. Everything is as normal, it’s an environment I usually can’t wait to leave behind so I can switch off the noise. Except it’s different now, not only because I’m searching faces for Ava’s, but because being around that woman is starting to reframe my whole world. She would never call this noise. She’d never think of it as crowded. She’d call it laughter. Conversation. Excitement. A celebration.
Ava is the kind of person who thinks being drenched in a thunderstorm is a chance to dance in the rain.
But without her by my side, I’d still rather leave it behind and watch a movie at home. I think about texting her, when I spot my sunshine and she’s right where we’re headed.
Her hair is swept up into a messy bun with two tendrils cascading down along the sides of her cheekbones, exposing her swan-like neck. She’s in jean shorts, legs flowing into her Doc Martens with that sexy black hoodie hanging off one shoulder. This outfit is exactly how I would have dressed my college dream girl. The way her shoulder teases out, milky white against the black cotton is so enticing my fingertips tingle with desire to slip it all the way down and press my lips to her freckles.
My pants tighten uncomfortably staring at her like this. But she’s nested among Callum’s guys and Penelope, so I pull myself together. Santi, who is now ten feet ahead of us, fist bumps Cal.
When Santi arrives at their group, Ava breaks away from her conversation, her gaze searching backward, as if looking for me as much as I was her. We connect across the riot of energy as if it doesn’t even exist. Like the pace of life turns instantly to slow motion. And when she smiles at me, the world stops altogether.
She gives me a wave when I approach, and I struggle to give a shit about saying hi to everyone else. Callum’s colleagues from the station are nice enough, they aren’t Karls, but I still don’t want them near my girl. I summon my self-control not to take her away right now. These guys were in the middle of buying balls for the dunk tank, and Santi already has three in his hands as well.
I glance up ahead to the tank and, lo and behold, Bran sits on the tiny plank of wood with a shit-eating grin on his face. He calls over to Santi.
“Ah, boss,” he teases, “don’t you have a good arm? You needed to bring your daddy and some muscle with you to get me down, did you?”
Santi tosses a ball up and catches it. Humor coats his words. “I had nothing to do with this crowd. Seems to me when people heard you’d be here, they couldn’t wait to soak you.” He glances to his right where there are a hell of a lot of balls that have been bought. “How did you make so many enemies?”
Bran doesn’t have any. He’s a good guy, but seeing as no one else that we know of from Echo Valley is being dunked tonight, it’s the only chance to actually enjoy this attraction.
Santi speaks to the young man running the tank. “How many balls you got in total?” He doesn’t wait for the answer and pulls out a hundred-dollar bill, handing it to the young guy. “Give me the box.”
Bran sees the box being handed over and laughs. “Ah… shit…”
Santi holds up a ball. “Who wants to go first?”
Ava, as enthusiastic as ever, raises her hand.
Santi gives her a ball. “Enjoy yourself, darlin’.”
“All right.” She dances on the spot excitedly, pumping herself up. “You’re toast, Bran!”
She darts her cute pink tongue out over her pouty lip, concentrating, and tosses the ball, but it doesn’t go very far. She has a throwing style like she’s never been shown how, and the ball stops well shy of the bullseye.
Santi gives her another. “Try again. I’ll get a hundred more if we have to.”
Bran is more relaxed with this throw; it’s clear Ava isn’t a Major League pitcher. When the ball goes in a big arc again and plops to the ground only feet away, her hoodie slips off her other shoulder, falling down into a provocative arc under her bare shoulder blades. Her back, now exposed, is an expanse my fingers ache to roam.
One of Cal’s guys steps in to… help.
He takes a ball from the box. “Here, I’ll show you what I learned in Little League.”
I can’t remember the officer’s name but I know Cal doesn’t surround himself with scum. Still, when he begins to slide into Ava’s personal space to give her a lesson, I’m not letting that happen.
I tap his shoulder before he gets any closer. “I got this.”
All eyes snap to me, especially Cal’s friend, who takes this as a man-to-man moment to assess what I’m really trying to say. My gaze must be a clear message because he hands me the ball .
“By all means…”
There are a lot more people around than I’d like when I stand almost flush with her, all that skin smelling of musk and tempting me more than ever. Every inch of her is irresistible. I want to dive right in and take a bite of that beautiful curve where her neck meets her shoulder. My heart pounds, and I try to concentrate on the task because everyone is looking at us, which makes me all the more uncomfortable, but I’ll take this discomfort to watching another man be anywhere near her.
She takes the ball from me, and I stand behind her, slide my hand over the back of hers, and raise her arm to show her the motion.
“You’re raising your arm too up and down.” I show her what she’s been doing and how she was releasing the ball to close to her shoulder.
She allows me to move her arm up and down but she’s stiff almost everywhere else, and I’m getting stiff, too. I swallow hard, trying to ignore the urge to wrap my free arm around her waist and haul her into me.
“What you need to do…” I draw her arm back farther. Her shoulder blade hits my chest, sending electricity across every inch of my skin. “… is pull back a little farther.” I move her arm slowly to show her the motion. “And release it here…” When her arm falls forward in mine, her hips inch backward, skimming the fabric of my now tight jeans.
I let go of her hand but can’t resist the urge to let my touch glide for a moment along her feminine wrist. Lord, how I could throw her down here and now and suck that perfume right off her.
Fuck.
I shove hands in my pockets and dip my head toward the dunk tank. “Give that a try. ”
Her lips are parted in that sensual way like she’s asking for more. Damn, I’d like to give it to her.
She’s breathless. “Thanks.”
Her honey eyes hold mine like they don’t want to let go. But if I hold this gaze any longer with her in that sexy hoodie hanging off her shoulders and her nipples pointing right at me, I’ll have a fuck-it moment coming on.
I flick my finger toward the tank. “Give it another go.”
She nods, and it somehow releases us both from this magnetic pull. She shimmies her shoulders, preparing for another throw. This time, the ball releases better, but it’s not enough progress to hit the target.
She throws her hands to her hips. “I’m not sure that’s my forte.”
Santi offers another ball. “It takes practice.”
She shakes her head. “Thanks, but you have a go.” Her intensely gorgeous round eyes sparkle when her gaze meets mine. “I’m off to the Ferris wheel?”
A hot trail burns through my insides, and I dip my chin, turning from everything I don’t give a shit about and toward everything I ever wanted from tonight.
Suddenly, I don’t regret sending that text one little bit.
She waves goodbye to Callum and Penelope, and we’re no more than ten steps away before a ping sounds off behind us, followed by a splash.
Ava giggles but doesn’t look back. “Sounds like they got Bran.”
“Santi has a good arm.”
“You have good arms…” A lilt of flirtation hangs on her statement.
A smile teases the corner of my lips. It’s a common feeling when I’m with Ava. The almost smile. Fuck, I feel good around her. Everything turns from gray to color in her presence.
We amble along, and I don’t want to make conversation and ruin watching her experience all of this. It’s an adventure just observing her. When a kid bumps into her because he’s too focused on unwrapping a toffee, she laughs. When a small practice firework whistles into the sky then fizzles out like hundreds of falling stars, her chin tips upward, and the awe in her eyes is as breathtaking as anything I’ve ever seen.
Everything she does is a lesson in how to live. Appreciate every moment. Be in awe of the small stuff.
I buy two tickets for the wheel, and we get in line. Now that our feet have stopped she lets out a sigh.
“This is amazing.”
“Not bad. They throw great fairs in Mount Hamilton.”
“Yeah.”
We stare at each other, a million words passing in our gaze; none are needed to make it clear why we’re both here. And suddenly, I don’t give a damn about contracts or fraternizing. The urge inside me to have her isn’t the kind of feeling that’s supposed to be pushed down. It’s supposed to be explored.
I swear she wants that, too.
I can feel she wants that.
Maybe I can take us there.
The tension between us is thick, but we avoid being drawn back into that lusty haze that passes between us when we lock eyes by staring up at the tall wooden structure instead. I focus anywhere but on her perfect features. I see nothing but blinking lights and tubs full of lovers, and I’m drawn in to the moment. Why can’t that be us? Why would I stop myself pursuing her for the sake of my reputation with a bunch of employees? I became the boss for a reason .
I want and need the control.
And I want and need Ava Scott.
Our arms press against one another; her merest touch is as electric as the neon lights. For the first time since meeting this flawless woman, I let my guard down and allow my fingertips to search for hers through the calliope sounds and the moonlit night.
We’re about to be called up and we’ll be alone. Unwatched. My jeans tighten just thinking about her lips on mine, but then again, I’d struggle to stop there. If I could do what I want to do to Ava, we’d be banned from this fair for all eternity. They could shield their eyes, but nothing would stop the sound of me making her scream with my head between her legs.
I slide my fingers deeper into her touch, and she wraps her soft skin around mine. Her hand is dainty and my palm fills with that electric feeling of something exciting and at the same time, it’s a comfort as though we’ve held hands a million times before. Finally, I dare to drink in her wide eyes and freckles. It’s going to be mighty hard to wait to kiss this woman.
We’re so transfixed, when her phone beeps it makes her jump.
She laughs and clutches her chest. “I don’t know why that scared me.”
I let go of her hand. The text somehow broke our sense of intimacy.
She slides out her phone, and in an instant, blood drains from her face and she’s a million miles away from where she’s standing now.
She’s stiff. Absolutely paralyzed. And my heart stills.
A couple dismounts the Ferris wheel bench, and the operator calls us forward .
Ava doesn’t even notice, hypnotized by whatever is on her phone.
A young man’s voice calls from behind me.
“Come on, folks…”
Her mouth opens; she’s aghast. She looks seconds away from passing out.
I grab her wrist. “Scottie?”
She snaps her gaze to mine. Her haunted eyes are far, far away from where we are.
“I’ll… I’ll be right back.”
She rushes off, and it’s apparent she doesn’t want me following her because she’s running off at breakneck speed, weaving through the crowd.
Not only does she not want to be followed. It’s also clear she’s not coming back.