Chapter 16
The Monster
“ T hat’s my girl,” I praise her as I push her back against the house and hoist her up, wrapping her legs around me. As quickly as I can, not caring if I fumble, I pull myself out of my jeans and pull the vibrator out of her dripping pussy.
As soon as she’s empty, I fill her right back up. She cries out as I enter her and digs her nails into my shoulders. I push my cock in as far as it can fit as she clamps down around me, begging me to go deeper.
“Say it again,” I command her as I pull out and slam back in. As much as I want to take my time and make sure she enjoys this, this time it’s not about her. This is about me and the war I just won, and I’m taking my prize.
“Cain,” she moans into my ear as her arms wrap around my neck.
“Now, tell me how much you love me,” I command her, only to hear her chuckle in response. I love the sound of her laugh, even if she’s laughing at me.
My pace is picking up as I push into her as quickly as I can, feeling her pussy tightening around me from the orgasm she’s still riding out. I’m about to embarrass myself with how quickly I come, but I can’t even bring myself to care anymore. Tonight, when we’re home and in my bed, I can take my time.
“I still hate you,” she breathes, her words losing the conviction she had last time she told me that. She’s breaking right in front of me, letting herself remember her feelings for me, and I’m going to be here to put her pieces back together.
“You won’t be saying that by the end of the night,” I promise her. Not with what I have in mind for my celebration. As I think of everything I can do to her tonight, I feel my orgasm building, threatening to make me explode prematurely. “Fuck, baby, I’m so close already.”
“Tell me I’m yours,” she begs me.
“You’re all mine, little one,” I tell her as my legs shake from the effort to hold back my orgasm. “Every inch of your body, every smile that lights up your face, every snarky insult is all mine. One day, you’re going to wear my ring so everyone knows you’re mine, and then I’m going to pump you full of little monsters.”
With my words, a violent orgasm rips through her. She clamps down on my cock, pulling me deeper inside of her, and I can’t hold it in anymore. I come just as explosively as she does, listening to her moan my name over and over again in my ear, like it’s the only word left in her vocabulary.
“I love you, Ainsley,” I whisper into her ear as I listen to her breathing start to calm down. I’ll say it to her every five minutes if that’s what it takes to make sure she never leaves me again. My love for her will never die, and it’s time she learns that.
She doesn’t reciprocate my declaration, but I didn’t expect her to. Not yet, at least. We have time for that. We’ve already come so far tonight; the rest will follow. I’ve won most of the battles, and tonight, I won the war.
When we’ve both calmed down enough, I pull out of her and rest her gently on her feet. It was almost easy to forget where we are and why we’re here, but now the reality of what just happened comes crashing down on us.
As I shoot her a mischievous grin, she looks at me with horror. We just fucked outside of her best friend’s house while in the middle of having dinner with him and his parents. And we weren’t exactly quiet about it, either.
“Please tell me we don’t have to go back in there,” she groans, the thought of facing everyone at that table overwhelming to her. I can see why she’s embarrassed, but I only feel triumphant.
“We don’t have to go back in there if you don’t want to,” I assure her. I’m only here because of her, so I wouldn’t mind getting out of this sham of a dinner early. “I can tell everyone that you got sick and I’m taking you home.”
She nods her head, and I can see the wheels spinning in her head as she tries to justify the lie in her head. “Maybe we can try again at a different time and not start the night so horribly.”
“Whatever would make you happy, baby.” Grabbing her hand and lacing our fingers together, we walk around the house until we reach the front door. “Why don’t you go wait in the car while I tell them we’re going home, okay?”
She nods and gives me a small smile as our fingers fall apart. As she turns her back and walks to the car, the idea of taking her home right now has me wanting to just shout through the door that we’re leaving instead of properly speaking to everyone. Unfortunately, she would be angry at me for doing that.
As she opens the door to the car, I open the door to the house and walk inside. Everyone is still sitting around the dinner table, Ethan looking angry and uncomfortable, and his parents looking sheepish.
“Ainsley isn’t feeling very well,” I explain as I walk into the room. “I’m going to take her home so she can get some rest. Thank you for dinner.”
“I hope she feels better,” Veronica says as she tries to make eye contact with me. “Maybe we can try this again? I would really like it if I could spend some time with you, Cain.”
The sad mother act has me burning with rage, but I do a pretty good job of hiding it. She left me as a child and never tried to come back for me. She doesn’t get to make amends now that I’m an adult.
With a fake smile and a nod of my head, I turn my back on the group and turn my focus on getting Ainsley home.
“You think we’re falling for that?” I hear a voice call from behind me as I pull the door open. Only a few more steps and I would have escaped, but of course he has to make this a big thing. “You just fucked her against the side of the house like she’s a cheap whore.”
My eyes were zeroed in on the car, knowing Ainsley is waiting in there for me, but his words stop me in my tracks.
Whirling around, I see the pathetic anger on his face that he means to direct at me. Grabbing the front of his shirt, I yank him out the door and shut it behind him. His parents don’t need to hear this.
As soon as the door shuts, my arm swings back, gaining momentum so I can slam my fist into his face. The sound of flesh hitting flesh and watching him stumble back from the impact makes me feel better, but hearing him insult Ainsley caused more anger than a simple punch can cure.
“Cain!” I hear Ainsley cry as the car door slams shut. “What the hell?”
Her footsteps stop beside me as I see her looking between Ethan and me. “Do you want to tell her what you just said to me?”
Ethan stares at me with hatred in his eyes as I watch him swallow, clearly nervous to have his words repeated.
“What did you say?” Ainsley asks him. She knows I wouldn’t just throw punches unless I was provoked. That’s the easiest way to lose all the progress we made tonight.
Ethan looks between us, his lips not moving to form the words he needs to say. I give him another minute, but when he still doesn’t confess to his insult, I do it for him. “He said I fucked you against the house like a cheap whore.”
Ainsley’s eyes snap to Ethan as his fill with an apology, but without the words coming from his mouth, his apology means nothing.
“Ethan?”
Ainsley gives him a chance to defend himself, but he doesn’t take it. He stays silent, taking the coward’s way out.
“I’m going to say this once, and only once, so get it through your thick fucking skull,” I address him. “When I fuck her, it’s to remind her she belongs to me, and to show her I love her. It’s not just a quick fuck to get my dick wet. She’s not some cheap whore, she’s going to be my wife. If I choose to fuck her against the side of a house, then that’s between her and me. And I promise you, Ethan, she certainly didn’t have a problem with it.”
A small hand wraps around my bicep as Ainsley tries to pull me away, but I don’t budge, too cemented in my spot. “I just want to go home. Take me home, Cain.”
Flashes of her covered in bruises, wearing nothing more than my shirt after attempting to jump off a balcony flash through my head, and I tense up more. No matter how much I try to push the memories out of my head, they’re not going anywhere.
“You’re using his name now?”
The betrayal in Ethan’s voice makes Ainsley flinch and release her grip from my arm, and I lose it. My fists pound into Ethan’s face as Ainsley yells behind me, trying to get me to stop.
“She’s.” Punch. “Not.” Punch. “Yours.” Punch.
Ethan is trying to find an escape, not having the courage to take the punishment for the words he thought he could speak. He finally stumbles away, and I let him go, not wanting to beat him to a point that Ainsley would hate me.
“That’s enough,” Ainsley says behind me in a firm tone I’ve never heard her speak before. Immediately, my back straightens as I take the reprimand she’s waiting to dish out, but Ethan takes the chance to get her on his side. “Both of you.”
Ethan’s mouth shuts, the fight on his tongue dying before it even comes out. I want to reach out and grab my little one, but the fury in her stare keeps me from doing so. She needs this moment as much as I needed her to give in to me.
“You,” Ainsley starts, pushing her finger into my chest as she puts the attention on me. The minimal contact shouldn’t be comforting to me, but it is, even if she’s reprimanding me. “I can fight my own battles. I appreciate you standing up for me, but next time, let me do it. He’s your brother, and he’s still my best friend, even if he’s being an ass.”
She turns her fury away from me and locks on Ethan, though she doesn’t push a finger into his chest. She stays right next to me, drawing strength from my presence even in her anger.
“And you. I don’t even know what to say to you.”
“Ains -”
She cuts him off as she holds up a hand. “No. I don’t want to hear it. When you’re over yourself and ready to talk like rational adults, I’ll be waiting. I don’t want to hear excuses or empty apologies. For now, you’ve been punished enough.”
He hangs his head like a scolded dog, but to my surprise, he doesn’t argue with her or try to get back in her good graces. He takes her words like he’s actually absorbing them and listening to her.
She turns her attention back to me, looking exhausted as she does so. “I’m tired, I’m sore, and I didn’t get to finish my dinner. Can you behave yourself long enough to get in the car and drive away?”
With a chuckle, I tell her, “I think I can do that.”
The glare she sends me in response has the chuckle dying in my throat, though the smirk on my face stays in place. She walks away from me, not waiting to see if I’m following as she makes it down the sidewalk and to the car.
As I climb in the car, I pull out the vibrator I tortured her with all night from my pocket and place it between us. “We’ve got about ten minutes until we’re home. Would you like to find out how many times you can come before then, or would you prefer to come on my cock all night?”
“That thing is not going back inside of me,” she answers, looking at it like it’s going to bite her. Lucky for her, I’m the only thing in this car that bites. “And you lost your chance when you beat up Ethan.”
My hand lands on her thigh as I pull the car away, feeling her muscles tensing underneath me as my fingers skim her leg, searching for her warmth. “It’s cute that you think you have a choice, little one. The only choice you have is how I make you come, not if you’re going to come.”
Her thighs are sticky from my cum running out of her, and at the feel of it, my cock stirs in my pants. When my fingers dip inside of her panties, feeling the wet heat of her pussy, I almost pull off to the side of the road just so I don’t have to wait any longer.
“So, you can choose, little one,” I tell her as my finger plunges inside of her and she spreads her legs wider to give me access. “I can make you come all over my fingers, or I can wait until we get home and you can ride my cock all night long. What’ll it be, baby?”
Her head falls back into the seat as she moans, “Cain.”
That’s all the answer I need. My thumb circles her clit as another finger pushes inside of her. It’s taking all of my willpower to pay attention to the road, but the sooner we get home, the sooner I can be inside of her.
“Tonight, you won’t escape me. Tonight is about reminding you why you fell in love with me, but also punishing you for making the conscious decision to forget everything that happened between us. Do you understand?”
Ainsley whimpers in response as her hand wraps around my arm, and her nails dig into my flesh. “I’m sorry,” she breathes.
She’s come far tonight, but sorry isn’t good enough. A simple apology will never fix the ache in my heart from hearing her tell me she’s done with me. A simple apology will never fix the knowledge that if I hadn’t succeeded this week, I may have lost her forever.
There’s no life for me without Ainsley. I’d be lost; turned into the cruel monster most men believe me to be. Ainsley is the reason I have even a single gentle bone in my body, even if it’s only purpose is to show her love.
“Apologies won’t fix this, little one.”
Her muscles contract around me, pulling my fingers deeper as she gets closer to her orgasm. My cock is pressing so hard against my zipper now, there’s going to be an imprint left.
“What do you want me to do? Do you want me to shout to the world that I’m yours? Or, maybe walk around with a backless shirt, so everyone can see your name permanently carved into my skin? Tell me what you want, Cain, and I’ll do it.”
While both options sound appealing, neither of them are quite what I have in mind. “I’ll give you two options.” Her eyes open as she tries to focus on me through her pleasure. “Option one, you can wear my ring and agree to be my wife.”
By the look on her face, I can tell that one’s not going to happen. Not yet, at least.
“Or, option two, you can take your punishment like the good girl I know you are. You’ll take every second of my punishment, because you know that what you did to us was wrong. And when the sun rises in the morning, there’s going to be no more lies between us. I won’t be the monster in your nightmares, and you’ll never deny that you belong to me again.”
She pulls my arm away from her, my fingers slipping out of her as my arm moves. She’s denying her own orgasm this time. “What I did was wrong, but it was necessary for me to survive. When you can understand that, then we can discuss options for punishment. But, not until you can admit that I’m not the only one who deserves a punishment.”
The car swerves off the road as my foot slams on the brake. No one is around, not on these back roads, but I still pull off the road as much as possible. Anger is flooding my system. Anger at her and her words, for assuming something she’s refused to even ask about this entire time.
“Do you think I haven’t been punished enough, Ainsley? Every day that you were gone, I hunted down the men that had anything to do with your captivity. Every day, I went home and carved your name into my skin to remind myself that I don’t deserve to be happy until the world is a safer place for you . And when night time finally came around? I barely slept, but when I did, I was plagued with nightmares of you telling me what a terrible person I am, or how I’ve ruined your life.”
Shame burns in her eyes as my voice gets louder, echoing through the car. “Cain -”
“No. I’m not done. Because after months of all of this, you know what I did? I still came back for you. Did you greet me or ask me how I’ve been? No. You decided it would be better to make me watch you fuck another man instead.” Flashes of that boy trying to touch her cross my mind, and I want to rip the fucking steering wheel out. Before I do, I step out of the car and run my fingers through my hair in the cool night breeze. Ainsley follows, stepping out from the other side of the car and cautiously approaching me. “So, you can go on and on about how I’m in the wrong, too, and I won’t deny it. But, I’ve been punished enough, Ainsley.”
A deep, steadying breath lifts my shoulders, but it doesn’t help me calm down. There are very few things that can help me calm down when I’m like this, and one of them is standing across from me, staring at me with remorse. I have to look away from her before I break.
I hear her walking toward me, but I don’t acknowledge her movement. Her hand lands on my chest, right over my heart, but still, I don’t acknowledge her.
“Look at me,” she commands. I don’t move an inch, even as she grabs my jaw and tries to lower my head to look at her. “I lost you, Cain. Not in the same way you lost me. To you, I was captured, but you knew you could find me. There was always hope. But, for me? You were gone. Wiped from this Earth, with no hope of me ever seeing you again. You were dead. For weeks, I believed it.”
“I wasn’t dead, though.” My voice cracks with emotion as I tell her this. That’s something else I’ve never stopped feeling guilty for. If I ever believed she was truly dead, there would be no moving on.
“I was forced to believe that you were!” she shouts. “Every time I acted out, I had to listen as you died on a video. I’m not telling you this to make you feel guilty, I’m telling you this so that you understand. When you died, so did I. Seeing you in my dreams was the only way I could keep going, but even that wasn’t enough to save me. I needed you. When you rescued me, I had to make a decision. I could stay in this life with you, knowing that you could go to work one day and never come back. Or, I could leave, and forget all the good things that happened between us. That was a decision I had to make to survive.”
“Ainsley -”
“No. Now it’s my turn. I’ve been punished enough, too. You want to take your anger out on me? Fine. You want me to wear your ring? Fine. But, don’t you dare sit here and act like you’re the only one that had to suffer. Because no matter how much I tried to push you away or make you the monster in my head, I never stopped loving you, and it’s been fucking torture. It’s been torture knowing that the one person I want is the one person I can’t have, because we’re not good for each other.”
This finally gets my eyes to meet hers. Tears are gathering on her eyelids, refusing to fall as she attempts to blink them away. “How many times do I have to tell you, little one? I’ll burn this entire world for you. If that’s what it takes for you to realize that it doesn’t matter if we’re good for each other or not, then I’ll do it, because you’ll always be mine.”
Leaning down, I press a gentle kiss to her lips as a tear finally falls down her cheek. As I pull away, I give her a cocky smirk. “Did you just agree to be my wife?”
“No!” she blurts out as her eyes widen with panic.
“You said you’d wear my ring,” I point out.
“It could just be a nice piece of jewelry without meaning anything,” she tells me. She’s trying to back away, not wanting to stay next to me while discussing the meaning of wearing an engagement ring I bought for her, but my arms wrap around her and trap her against me.
“Did you mean it?” She looks up at me with a question in her eyes, not understanding what I’m asking her about. “You said you never stopped loving me. Did you mean it?”
She tries to look away from me, but I unwrap an arm from around her and capture her jaw in my grasp. She doesn’t confirm or deny it, but as I look into her eyes, I see the answer there.
“Let me hear you say it,” I beg her.
This time, she doesn’t fight me, or even hesitate. She’s done denying me now. “I love you, Cain.”