Chapter 35
Fuck.
I’m an ass. Urging Theo to train on a Sunday?
I should've just let her sleep in, let her rest. Isn't that what she needs most after the week she's had?
No. An instant corner of my brain is convinced that what she truly needs is to be able to protect herself, for her well-being, and her survival. Shit, I hardly know myself at the moment. I need to stop with this starry-eyed bullshit and get my act together.
I text, asking if she can meet me outside Defectivum in twenty minutes. No reply. After smoking what feels like a dozen cigarettes, I’m too wound up to keep waiting. What if something’s wrong? She passed out yesterday due to the energy echo.
Screw it. I jog across campus and head straight to her dorm. A couple of nervous remedial witches scatter as I enter Defectivum.
Nothing to see here. Just a professor who’s come to pick up a student for training. Totally normal. Pounding on the door that leads to her room, I hear nothing, so I try the handle. It’s unlocked.
Not good enough, pulu.
Wait a minute, is her room in the fucking basement? "Wilson?" I call out as I descend the creaking steps.
She peeks out from behind a sheetrock partition, dressed in orange leggings and a red tank, with some kind of chilli pepper design. The top clings to her delicate curves and brings a smile to my face. "Hey." She seems genuinely pleased to see me. Maybe I’m not some middle-aged stalker.
“Come in,” she says, pulling back the partition further. “I just need to put on my trainers.”
While she knots her laces, I look around the basement. It reeks of damp concrete and mold. Why the hell is she living down here? Defectivum House is gloomy and depressing in general, but that’s nothing compared to this. I look inside her cubicle-sized bedroom; it’s worse than I could imagine.
A twin bed, on a stained carpet, is pushed against the wall. The furniture is chipped and worn: a tiny dresser, a rickety desk, and a chair that looks as though it would collapse if you dared to sit on it. "What the fuck, Theo? This isn't a dorm room. I wouldn't house my worst enemy down here."
That’s entirely true; most of my interrogations would take place in much worse conditions.
Amazingly, Theo giggles. "I didn’t take you for a snob," she laughs.
"It's perfectly fine. In fact, way bigger than the room I had at my aunt's.
" She points to a heap of clothing near a battered, three-pronged thing, slightly askew.
"And look—I always wanted a hat stand." She looks at it fondly, to my bemusement.
Has she never known living conditions better than this? The thought makes my fists tighten. “I'll talk to Bilderblast. This is not good enough."
Theo grabs my arm. "Please don’t. I actually like it down here. The basement feels safe. Plus, Ludo put in a shower, and it’s heaven not having to share."
"Ludo?"
"The facilities man. He's my friend." Theo adjusts her knee socks. “You must know him. Really tall, long white hair?"
"Can't say I do, I'm a little busy trying to find my lost cousin while faking it as a teacher,” I mumble mindlessly.
Shit. Maybe she didn’t catch what I said.
But Theo doesn’t miss a beat. "Wait, what? Fake teacher?" she asks, her silver eyes widening with confusion.
“Guilty as charged,” I sigh. I don't want to keep hiding who I am, and I know I can trust Theo. It’s kind of odd to believe in someone after everything I’ve learned over the years, but I decide to lean into it. “I came here solely to find Max. And I fucking hate students.”
She sits down on the bed, her gaze still fixed on me. “Wow, intense. So what do you do if you’re not a teacher? Who are you really? Is Alexis even your name?"
Realizing I need to give her some answers, I go to sit next to her on the mattress.
"Move up.” She scoots over, making room.
The springs groan in protest as I add my weight.
"Yes, Alexis is my real name. No, I'm not a professor. My last ten years have been spent in a branch of the Kormovian military. I was discharged last year after an injury.”
“Oh, your arm,” she gasps, placing a hand on my knotted scars. “What happened?”
“I was in the royal protection detail—there was a bomb attack.” I don’t want to go into any further details, and Theo seems to sense that.
“Tell me about Kormovia—what's it like?" she asks, taking hold of my hand.
My mind tumbles back to the place of my birth.
“It’s a tiny principality between Finland and Russia.” How do I explain the hopeless politics and struggles of the place? “It’s tucked away between two much more powerful forces, both vying for the land. Land hardly worth fighting for; craggy mountains and poor soil.”
Yes, the thin air is sharp and clean, but it carries the scent of poverty along with the smell of the pine forests.
“The current royal family keeps fighting, but the next generation wants reform. We want to allow Finland to annex us, bring us under their wing, so our people will have access to healthcare and fair-paying jobs. But the current prince is old in both years and attitude.”
Gods. Change has to happen; people are desperate.
I look down at where our fingers are entwined, an unfamiliar warmth spreading through me. "It's a dump," I sigh, the words laced with a hopelessness I can't suppress. “And not worth fighting for.”
Theo frowns. “Is that what you really think? I can’t believe you’d fight for a country you thought so little of…”
"Kormovia is in my blood, and I feel a sense of duty to the place. But it’s not my true home. Not anymore.” And isn’t that the truth? I have no home. She looks at me with those big, silver eyes full of sympathy, and I change the subject abruptly.
“The basement stairs are a fucking death trap." I get up and start poking underneath the treads as a knock sounds from above. “Expecting company?" I ask, quickly straightening up.
“Wait here, I'll go see who it is.” She puts a finger to her lips. “And keep quiet. Probably best not to advertise that I've got a professor in my bedroom, even if he is just a pretend one.”
Good point.
She contradicts herself two minutes later, though, by leading a man into the room to meet me. He's so huge that the tiny space seems like a dollhouse. Gods, is he seven feet tall?
"This is Ludo," Theo says. "Ludo, this is Alexis Feniks."
I narrow my eyes at the giant. When Theo mentioned the janitor had long white hair, I'd expected someone elderly.
Not a man who looks my age, or even younger.
What kind of 'friendship' do these two have, really?
The giant, dressed in gray coveralls, is completely expressionless.
"Nice to meet you," I say, trying to sound casual.
"I was just checking on Theo. She's, er, not feeling well. "
Ludo doesn’t reply, just shifts his head slightly towards Theo.
She rolls her eyes at her enormous janitor.
“I’m completely fine,” she tells him. What is she playing at?
Turning back to me, she has a determined look in her eye.
"Listen, Alexis, we can trust Ludo. He can help us. Ludo knows more about this place than anyone else.”
“Is that right?” I can’t stop the scowl on my face. “You’re the Validus Vale expert, then, Ludo?”
He doesn’t reply, just looks down at me from his infuriating height.
Theo tuts. “Yes, he is. Ludo’s lived at the academy since he was a boy," she explains.
"Then why doesn’t he say so himself?" I sneer, my gaze fixed on Ludo. "Cat got your tongue, big man?"
Theo hisses angrily. "Alexis! Don’t be so rude." She pauses, then adds, confusingly, "No, no, it’s not alright." Giving me one more glare, she says, "Ludo doesn’t speak."
Oh. That does make me feel like a bit of a shit. But it doesn’t mean I trust him.
There’s another strange pause.
"No, stay, Ludo,” Theo says, then turns to me. "I'm telling Ludo everything, and you can't stop me,” she says in a surprisingly firm voice.
The little baggage starts spilling everything—how her 'friends' Wes and Donovan have disappeared, and so has my cousin, that’s why I'm faking being a teacher,
“STOP!” I bark and reach out an arm, trying to get her attention, but the giant’s fist clamps over mine, crushing it in his vice-like grip.
"Ludo, put him down. He’s just nervous. Alexis doesn't know you like I do.” Theo pulls Ludo’s hand away, and I shake out my hand.
“And just how well do you know this janitor?” I spit out. She's only been here a couple of weeks. He could be a WMO spy, a Bratva member, or anything for all we know. She's too trusting.
“I don’t know what you’re implying, Alexis, but I don’t appreciate it,” she flashes back, with a furious expression.
My eyes go between her and this Ludo talonmies. He cocks his head to one side, meeting my stare with heterochromic eyes—both are utterly unreadable. Theo bites her lip, her gaze flickering to me, then away.
She seems almost in…turmoil.
“I know I can trust Ludo…" she starts, her voice hesitant, then stops again, her brow furrowed, clearly agonizing, caught between a rock and a hard place.
"What is it, pulu?" I ask, my voice softening, letting the concern bleed through. "You can talk to me." Anguish flickers in her eyes.
"Can I, though?" she whispers. The doubt stabs me in the guts.
"Haven't I proven that?" I demand, my tone heating slightly, defensiveness flaring. But even as I say it, I feel shame at my lies of omission. I haven't shared all my secrets. Not yet. Not the deep ones. I instantly make a mental vow to do so as soon as it’s safe.
Theo's shoulders slump. Ludo’s hand hovers over her shoulder for a moment, as though he’s going to touch her, but then thinks better of it. Good choice. I suppress a surge of primal irritation—mine, not yours, you dumb animal—and force my expression to remain neutral.
Theo sighs deeply, looking at me with clear, resolved eyes. "I guess I can trust you, too. Anything to add, Ludo?"
A few seconds later, she turns back to me. "Ludo says he’ll break every bone in your body if you betray me.”
“I’m not going to betray you…but how?”
“How did I know what he said?” She looks at me with a sad smile. "I can hear his thoughts, Alexis,” Theo tells me, making my mouth fall open.
“And if you let me, I think I’ll be able to hear yours too."