CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT #2
My boots crunch against the trail leading into the castle grounds. The guards bow as I pass and I can’t help the squeamish feeling in my gut. I know I’ve decided to go this route of Queendom, but what if I’m making a mistake? What if I throw the realm into even more chaos than there is?
Nero nips lovingly at my ear. “Damn Rav, don’t be too hard on yourself. You’ll be great; you were literally born for this role,” he reminds me softly.
My hand reaches out to graze the stone of the castle wall as I continue. “I get that, but I can’t even get this mate thing right. If I can’t settle my own issues how can I take care of thousands?”
Nero sighs and I feel Aemon and Jesper push comforting feelings down the bond towards me. They’re giving me some space to sort my mind out and talk with my friends, but I know I’m never without them, even when they aren’t in the same room as me.
As I continue searching the castle, Nero hums and chitters on my shoulder or squawks loudly at the staff as they pass, making them startle and rush off. Except for the kitchen staff—he gives them the bird equivalent of doe eyes until they feed him snacks. All I can do is shake my head in amusement.
After going to the courtyard, training yard, horse stables and the dining room with no luck, I head to Ember’s room and knock on the door before entering.
The sight before me has me gasping, covering my eyes while hastily apologizing, and Nero whistles before I slam the door shut and give them a second. Was that…?
“Roz worshipping Ember’s dungeon like a man in chains? Yes, yes it was,” Nero adds with a hint of amusement.
Before I can even formulate a thought, Ember whips open the door, her yellow eyes wide as she shoves a grinning Roz out of the room.
“Hey, Rav.” His grin somehow gets larger.
Ember yanks me inside, slamming the door behind us. “I can explain,” she states seriously.
I do my best to keep the grin off my face but I can’t. “Uh huh. So he wasn’t just eating you out like a man starving for a meal?”
She covers my mouth. “Shh! Don’t say that so loud. No one knows yet.”
I try to keep my composure as I nod. I’ve never seen calm, cool, collected Ember so frazzled before. “Your secret is safe with me,” I state.
She continues on like she hasn’t heard what I said.
“It’s just after the battle, I was coming off an adrenaline high and Roz was there and I think I have feelings for him, but I’m not sure, but he was being supportive and just looked so damn fine covered in blood, sweat and armor and I kind of jumped him.
We haven’t even talked about what we are doing.
It just keeps happening. I brought him in to talk and next thing I know I’m on my back and he’s doing wicked things with his tongue—”
“Breathe,” I tell her, trying not to laugh as I reach up to grasp her shoulders. “Take a breath or five for me.”
Nero wiggles on my shoulders. “No, let her keep going, I’m curious.”
I shoo Nero off my shoulder but he just glides down to a nearby chair, watching us with amusement.
“So, you and Roz huh?” I tease with a raised brow. “And here I was coming to vent about my male issues, but yours seem much more interesting.”
“Oh shut it Rav, you have four males in your little harem. Yours is definitely more interesting than me fucking Rozen Stoll.” There’s the Ember I know and love. Although Frazzled Ember is certainly entertaining.
“To be honest, I was waiting for this to happen—you two have been eye-fucking since Phixmery. I’m surprised you held off this long,” I tease, heading over to the chairs near the balcony. Nero follows, perching on the stone railing while pretending to gaze out to the ocean.
“Ugh, Rav. I never wanted a partner. I was to go to Phixmery, become a top berserker and make my parents proud. Even though I can barely stand them. They’re like every other typical Vopn Fo parent.
Violence is our way of life. Although I have to admit, mine are better in that aspect—but after meeting you and the others I realized I want more in life than just fighting because I can.
Then feelings—” she shivers—“for Roz began forming, and I don’t know what I’m going to do about it yet. I promise to keep you in the loop.”
I don’t try to hide my smile this time. “That sounds like a plan to me. But you should tell Mel. She will be so excited to help you figure all this out. Not to mention she will have a thousand questions for you.”
Ember’s gaze widens. “Just give me a minute to wrap my own head around it. But yes, I will tell her. Now, why were you searching me out?”
I sigh and slouch back in my chair. “I may have exploded at Talyn. I just don’t know what to do with him anymore. He’s so hot and cold, and I just want to wring his neck while also wanting him to wring every ounce of pleasure from my body and…” I throw my hand in the air.
Her eyes somehow get wider as I explain the events since we arrived at the war camp, from the bone-melting angry kiss to me telling him that he can watch while I fuck his friends before flying off.
She clears her throat. “And you’ve bonded with Jesper? See, much more entertaining.”
“Ember,” I sigh, rubbing my brow. “What do I do?”
She uncrosses her legs and leans forward, resting her elbows on her knees, her bed-frazzled black bob falling slightly into her face.
“Well. You could always duel him? Or you can wait to see if he comes to you? It seems like he’s almost there.
Especially with you finally snapping back and shoving in his face what he can or can’t have.
That would drive a male like Talyn crazy, I think.
So when he comes to you, try not to be rash.
Listen to him. Unless he’s a dick again, and then I’ll help you torture him. ” She smiles mischievously.
I can’t help but sigh. “Hopefully I don’t need to take you up on that.”