CHAPTER 28 BEN
I race back to the salon to pick up my girl, tugging at the collar the whole way.
I enjoy dressing up if the occasion is right, but I hate wearing a tie. I already feel like I’m choking and I’ve only been wearing it for ten minutes.
I’m doing this for her.
When Gramma said I need to do something meaningful for Kaylee, I was struck by a conversation we recently had.
It’s a Friday night, but I’ve learned over the last decade that the right amount of money can get just about anything accomplished.
And it doesn’t hurt that the people of Great Falls—barring my mother and my ex—are wonderful.
I’ve known a lot of them for many years, and I’ve promised a few of them a social media shout as I called in favors to make this happen.
I’m hopeful that this is the exact grand gesture that will help cement my feelings for her in her own mind. While it won’t erase what I did yesterday out of my own emotional distress, it will show her that what I feel for her is about much more than just sex.
I grab the garment bag and two small plastic containers out of the backseat and make my way back into the salon.
Kaylee is a gorgeous vision as always, and my need to fuck radar comes to life when I spot her sitting in a chair in the waiting area.
She’s all finished, and her hair is pulled up and away from her face with a mass of curls on top of her head.
Her make-up is dark and dramatic, and she looks exactly how I pictured she would… only somehow more beautiful.
Kaylee stands and narrows her eyes at me when I walk in. “What’s going on and why are you wearing a suit?”
I wink at her and smile, and then I hand the garment bag to Betty.
“Follow me, darling girl,” Betty says, and Kaylee glares a little more at me before she follows Betty.
I can’t help a hearty laugh.
She returns a few beats later, and she’s wearing a hot pink, strapless dress with a big, puffy skirt.
“Wow,” I say, mostly because I’m at a loss for words as her beauty strikes me. And I am never at a loss for words.
Jesus, does she look fuckable right now. I could lay her out on the floor of this salon. Hell, I could fuck her in one of the swivel chairs.
I blow out a breath as I try to tame the monster. Sex is definitely not what tonight is about.
Playbook page thirty-six. Playbook page thirty-six.
That almost always helps tame it. Not tonight.
She looks at me in wonder for a beat, and then I grab the corsage with white and hot pink flowers from one of the plastic containers and slide it onto her wrist.
Her eyes seem to get a little misty when I hand her the other container, like she has a feeling she knows what’s happening.
She takes the boutonniere out of the box and pins it to the lapel of my jacket, and then I offer her an elbow.
“Ready?” I ask.
She nods. “Thanks, Betty. It was lovely chatting with you.”
“Same to you, darling girl. Have a fun night!”
“Thank you, Mrs. Howard,” I say, and I hand her an envelope with a few more bills in it than the price she quoted me earlier. “Your work is flawless as always.”
She giggles as I bow with a flourish, and then we head out the door to our next destination.
Kaylee’s quiet on the way, and I reach over and slide my hand onto her thigh. I slide it a little higher, teasing her just a little, and she squirms as I get close to the Promised Land.
“Nervous?” I ask.
She glances over at me. “With you?” She shakes her head. “Never.”
I squeeze her thigh, and a minute later I pull into the parking lot of Dante’s, the only Italian restaurant in town.
She shakes her head with wonder again as she stares out the windshield. “You really listened,” she murmurs.
I park the truck and cut the engine. I turn toward her, and our eyes connect. “I listen to every word you say, Peaches, and I will for as long as you’ll let me.”
Her eyes get misty again, but she holds it together as I exit the car and walk around to her side to escort her into the restaurant.
We have spaghetti and meatballs with too many breadsticks, and Kaylee wants cheesecake for dessert so we order one of those as well.
We skip the alcoholic beverages since she wouldn’t have been able to drink one at a restaurant when she was fifteen, and after I treat for dinner, we head toward my alma mater.
As I pull into the parking lot, I can’t help but think how some things never change as the place brings up a million different memories.
She missed her sophomore year Homecoming while my own memories of mine are full of regret.
I played varsity all four years, and we’d lost to our rival the night before the dance.
As a football player, we were encouraged to show up at the dance since it was technically held in our honor.
I showed—we all did—but most of us were nearly blackout drunk.
I didn’t get caught, but a few of the other guys did.
They were kicked out of the dance and disciplined the following Monday.
Punishments varied based on each kid’s list of previous offenses—a few kids were suspended, others got detention, and some got a slap on the wrist. I ducked out early with my date, fucked her in the shadows beneath the bleachers, and walked her home before I went home to sleep off what was already turning into a massive hangover.
And the reason for my regret?
Well, for one thing, I blew off my date the following Monday. I was a shithead back then, and I didn’t handle losing well. She was pissed, and she never spoke to me again.
To be clear, I didn’t necessarily grow out of treating women the same way I treated her. The difference, though, was that I learned to make the expectations clear from the start. I don’t have to blow them off now because they know it’s one and done…or it was until Kaylee came along.
For another thing, I felt bad that I was one of the lucky ones who didn’t get caught. My sense of responsibility told me I should’ve stuck by my teammates like a man and taken whatever punishment was issued to me. But I didn’t.
It doesn’t matter. Regret is poison. You can’t change the past, but you do have the power to change the future. And so rather than living with regret, I choose to learn.
Still, though—tonight’s plan is to replace those shit memories with something sweeter.
She holds onto my elbow as I escort her into the doors of the gymnasium, and I’m in awe at what I find.
The teacher in charge of Student Council here at the high school was in my graduating class, as it happens. Jen and I were friends back in the day, and when I called in a favor, she more than delivered…even though it’s summertime and nobody’s around.
A balloon arch welcomes us in with a poster proclaiming it the Sophomore Year Homecoming Dance in huge letters running across the folded up bleachers on the far end of the gym from where we stand.
Bunches of balloons and streamers in white and blue—the school colors—decorate the gym, and Jen stands near the balloon arch.
“Welcome to Homecoming,” she says, and she splays a hand out to indicate the gym. I lean over and give her a hug with Kaylee’s arm still planted in mine.
“Thank you for everything.”
She smiles. “My Stu-Co kids are always looking for summer service hours.” She winks at me.
“The deejay table is over there,” she says, nodding toward a table set up across from where we’re standing.
“You can just plug in your phone and the speakers will take care of the rest. The doors are locked, so just flick that switch over there before you leave and we’ll come by in the morning for clean-up. ”
“I owe you one,” I say.
Jen laughs. “Yeah, you sure do.” She wiggles her fingers. “Have fun, kids!” She heads out the doors we came in, and I run across the gym to plug my phone in and start the playlist I made in between getting all these other details nailed down today.
A slow Tim McGraw song starts playing, and of all the crazy things in the world…I think I’m starting to actually like country music again.
I glance around the gym before my eyes land on the woman standing beneath the balloon arch by the entrance.
I find myself alone with Kaylee at our very own sophomore year Homecoming dance, and I could not be more excited about this evening.
I walk across the gym back toward her, and she meets me somewhere in the middle. “May I have this dance?” I ask.
So it’s a cheesy line. Ask me if I give a fuck.
She gives me a look like she’s ready to tear her panties off, so I think the line worked. She moves toward me, and I take her into my arms as we sway softly to the beat of the song.
“I can’t believe you did all this for me,” she says softly.
“I wanted to do something special for you. I wanted you to know how much I care about you.”
“But why?” she asks.
I lift a shoulder. “Yesterday…I learned some things about myself, and I learned some things about you, too. I want to give you amazing memories of this place, and yesterday…it wasn’t that.
But we worked through it, and I think we came out stronger for it.
I don’t want to think about what happens come October, but I do want to think about how this feels right now.
I want to hold onto this moment, and to you, and I never want to let go. ”
I look down into her eyes, and she blinks back tears before she tips her chin up. I wrap my palm around the back of her neck then lower my lips to hers.
I kiss her with everything inside me.
I pour everything I own into this kiss—all the feelings and emotions that seem to intensify on a daily basis for her.
It’s slow and sensual, tender and moving, and I’m not sure I’ve ever kissed anyone this way before.
I open my mouth to hers, our tongues moving together in a mesmerizing collision.
We kiss like we have all the time in the world, like we could stay here in this place for an eternity.
There’s no aggression or angst or urgency like so many of our kisses are filled with.
This time, it’s simply two people showing each other love in the purest, simplest form possible.
Her arms tighten around my torso, and my hand around her neck moves so my fingertips are in her hair. My other arm is wrapped tightly around her, hauling her to me so we can be as close as physically possible.
She pulls away first, her eyes hooded with lust. She gazes at me for a beat, and I see a bit of fear and some confusion buried in her eyes.
I can’t help but feel a little insecure as to what it’s all about, but then she blinks and draws in a deep breath, and it’s like the fear disappears.
It’s as if she came to some realization in that moment, and I know she will share it with me when she’s ready to.
I just pray it’s the same realization I keep coming to. Because if it isn’t, when September ends…I don’t want to face reality.