Chapter 29 #2
“All the staring you two do. If you’re not watching him, he’s watching you.”
My heart skipped. Was he really?
“It’s pretty disgusting, actually,” she grumbled.
“That implies that you have been watching us, or specifically m—” I yelped when she rammed her heel into my toes.
She relinquished her torment and settled her back against the habitat. “All our lives depend on you lot, so don’t screw it up by losing your shit.”
“I don’t know if I ever had any shit to lose.”
She gave the comment some thought, nodded, then added, “Talk to him.”
A sour taste filled my mouth. “No.”
She wore the frown of one who stepped in dog shit and smelled it for a click. “Here I am giving you sisterly advice, and you’re going to ignore it?”
“It is poor advice.” I shivered, not needing to see the glare she fixed on me to know it was there. “I meant, you don’t know the full story, and if you did, then you would speak differently.”
“Suit yourself.” She left without another word.
I felt neither triumphant nor defeated. We talked, albeit for a moment.
She implied she had kept her eye on me, as I had done with her.
Maybe in these three months we’d end up with some semblance of a relationship.
Nothing like we were at the Colony, where we trusted one another, where she trusted me, but better than nothing.
Better than believing the other to be dead…
and her being disappointed when she learned I wasn’t.
I would never have a family again. Even our corpses couldn’t be reunited. But maybe like this I could get a glimpse into what might have been.
“Didn’t I tell you to stop that?”
“Son of a bitch!” I threw a punch that didn’t land.
Roys smacked my hand away, failing to hide his smug expression. “I was beginning to think we were past the point of you wanting to break my nose.”
“That was your own fault for sneaking like a creep.” My cigarette fell in the fiasco. I crushed it under my boot and kept my glare on that boot otherwise my resolve may crumble. “What are you doing? How did you know I was here?”
“Madlyn told me.”
“Fucking bitch.” We hadn’t made up. She threw me to the wolves. I waved a hand in defeat. “Fine, go on. Let’s get this over with.”
“When you put it like that, it makes apologizing more difficult.”
“Good. Hurry up, I’m hungry, and this is a complete waste of our time.”
“Are you going to consider my apology?”
“No.”
“Ethin.”
I made an X shape with my arms. “N.O. No.”
He kissed me. Short and sweet and not what it should have been because my heart had traitorous intentions.
He especially shouldn’t have done that when anyone could see us, where the engineer hadn’t finished her inspection of the shuttle.
One look our way and she would see the way Roys watched me like I was the center of his universe, and I wanted nothing more than to be drawn in.
“I’m sorry, Ethin,” he said, speaking my name with a beauty unlike any other.
“For letting you and everyone down. If you hadn’t reacted the way you did, we wouldn’t be here.
I’m sorry for raising my voice and getting upset at you when I should have proved that I meant every word I said. I was being a jackass. I’m sorry.”
The apology shouldn’t have made me want to pull him in and beg him to repeat it a thousand times. I needed to turn it back in his face, leave, go anywhere, do anything but linger there and mutter against his mouth, “And?”
“And?” he echoed, taking a moment to scratch his arm.
My fingers caught on the tip of his armbands where his muscles flexed when I rubbed his skin. “Aren’t you sorry for not trusting me?”
“What?”
“That’s why you hesitated, because you didn’t trust my plan.”
He reached for my hands gently, nothing like the way we were meant to be. “Of course not.”
And I held on to him foolishly. “But you froze.”
“I did… It was a fluke, and I was mad at myself for that fluke. I took it out on you.”
“You don’t make mistakes.”
“I am flattered, but I make plenty. Trust me.”
“That’s really it?”
“Yes. You had a brilliant plan. We’re alive because of you. You did great, and I never meant for a second to imply that I didn’t trust you.” He smirked when I finally met those dangerously tempting eyes. All the tension from these last three days disappeared in an instant.
“This kind of sucks. I wanted hot, angry sex, and you ruined the mood.”
Except he hadn’t. He made everything more difficult by laughing and coming in for a kiss that had me wondering why I ignored him when I could have had his tongue in my mouth.
I wanted to kiss him, to drag him to the ground right there and then and make up for all the lost time.
The bastard dared to deprive me of him, so I caught my fingers in his hair and kept him there.
Just a little more where I relearned his mouth as if it could have changed in our short time apart.
“Was that really what upset you?” he asked, knocking his forehead against mine.
“It made the most sense.”
“How many times have I brought up how smart you are?”
He wrapped an arm around my waist to prevent my escape, although I had a sneaking suspicion that he’d find me wherever I went.
And I’d want him to.
“When you say it, it always feels like you’re poking fun or looking down on me.” I admitted under my breath.
“I suppose there have been numerous times when I said it because I was irritated with you. But really, you are an immovable force, Ethin, truly, incredibly breathtaking, in more ways than you will give yourself credit for,” he said, and it was more than I could bear, more than I could accept, but he caught my chin and kissed away any chance to speak doubts.
We stood like that; me leaning against him, uncaring if anyone found us while his thumb rubbed my side.
I traced the lines of his face, over his jaw that he hadn’t shaved that morning.
The stubble tickled and I leaned in to feel it, to feel him on my lips and taste him, although I missed the cherry.
That flavor had become his and I wanted more of it everyday.
“Why did it take you days to work up the nerve to apologize face to face?” I asked when my hands traveled to his neck.
“Do I need to remind you about the die message?” He laughed and took my hand to press a kiss against my palm.
I should pull away. Leave.
I didn’t.
“You glared bloody murder at me any time I was in the room.” He narrowed his eyes in a teasing fashion. “Figured you might cool off if I kept away, except you certainly know how to hold a grudge, don’t you?”
That… was true. Maddy brought it up as well, though I hadn’t meant to glare that badly. I was annoyed, especially after he gave all those compliments. I thought he lied, and the pain of that made me so incredibly bitter. I didn’t want to care.
But I did. I wanted to believe him. I wanted to believe in what he saw in me.
“Grudges are meant to be held,” I replied against those lips that would hardly leave me be, and I didn’t mind even a little.
“Is this grudge over?” he whispered between every touch that never lasted long enough.
“I could use further convincing.”
“How about tonight? My room this time.”
My chest grew heavy, my breathing a little labored. “A change of scenery?”
“Among other options.” He caught me by the waist and whispered in my ear, “To make up for the loss of angry sex, I want you to fuck me tonight.”
He walked away, leaving me with a far too eager imagination and heat running straight to my cock.
I ran after him. “We should fight more often!”
Roys laughed, and I started counting down the time to lights out.