Chapter 14
Mina
Twenty-years-old
Four hours later, I stand freshly showered in front of the sink and look at the mirror, eyeing the damage Pavlin did to my face.
Aunt Pippa applies more ointment to my bruises, her touch lighter than her mood.
“Nothing like this would have happened if you just knew your place. What were you thinking about being inducted into the Firm? Didn’t it ever cross your mind that something like this was bound to happen? That your father’s enemies would use you to get to him.” She shakes her head in disappointment. “I was sure your father was going to have a stroke when he heard you being rammed off the road. If he died, where would that leave the rest of us, huh, Missy?”
I don’t offer her a reply because… why bother? Nothing I say will change my Aunt Pippa’s mind, nor will it change the selfish person that she is.
My being kidnapped is only an inconvenience to her if it impairs my father’s health. Otherwise, it’s just another Tuesday morning.
I cringe at the memory of my father’s face when he first saw me upon my arrival. He must have aged ten years in these last ten hours.
I hate my Aunt Pippa’s misogynistic way of thinking, but to see my father like that, so afraid, so debilitated, almost had me considering if being a part of the family business was even worth it. Deep down, I know that it is and that things like getting kidnapped by the Bratva are just hazards of the trade.
Even Remus and Rolo looked worse for wear, not leaving me alone for a minute. I had to kick them out of my room so I could take a much-needed shower. The only person I let stay with me was my Aunt Pippa, and that was because I didn’t trust myself to be able to shower alone.
“There. That’s as good as it will ever get without some major cosmetic surgery,” she announces dryly. “All you can do is rest now. Hopefully, you look well enough to go out into society in a couple of days. Until then, you’re on bedrest, Missy.”
I want to remind her that she can’t boss me around, but in all honesty, I’m too exhausted to pick a fight with her. A week lying in bed sounds like heaven right now.
“Do you need anything else?” she asks after helping me onto the bed.
“No. I’m fine. I just need some sleep,” I reply, slipping under the covers.
“Well, at least on that, we agree.” She frowns before pulling the duvet over me. “I’ve left explicit instructions not to disturb you while resting. I don’t want you leaving this room for the next couple of days, or at least until you feel you can move about without help. Is that understood?”
“It is,” I sigh, my lids already too heavy to give my aunt the nasty look she deserves.
But then she surprises me by leaning down and pressing a kiss to the top of my head.
“I know you and I have never seen eye to eye, Mina, and I know that I could never replace your saintly mother, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care for you. You gave us quite the fright, young lady. Please don’t do it again.”
“I’ll try my best.” I smile softly.
“See that you do,” she replies, and for the first time ever, I notice genuine tenderness in her gaze—which comes as a complete shock, considering I normally see nothing but pound signs reflected in her eyes.
Once Aunt Pippa leaves the room, I sink into bed, ready to let sleep take me under.
Unfortunately, she must have forgotten to impart more of her wisdom because, moments later, a faint knock sounds at the door.
“I said I’m fine, Aunt Pippa. I don’t need anything.”
But when knocking persists, I have no option but to get out of bed to open the door.
However, it’s not my aunt I find on the other side of the door when I swing it open, but Jude, with his arms stretched wide against the doorframe and his head hung low.
“What… what are you doing here?” I ask since he has never once come to my bedroom in all the years he’s lived here.
As he slowly lifts his gaze to meet mine, I see everything I’ve ever desired reflected in his eyes.
“I’m not here to fight,” he says, his voice barely above a whisper.
“Then what are you here for?” I ask with bated breath.
“For you, Mina. I’m here for you.”
I swallow dryly, frozen to the spot, unable to move.
He takes my hesitance as a sign of not wanting him here, so he begins to step away.
“No.” I stop him before he has a chance to move another inch. I then widen the door, which Jude accepts as an open invitation to walk inside.
I close the door behind me and lock it, leaning against it for support.
He doesn’t spend much time looking around my room, too focused on me instead.
“Last night,” he starts, his voice gruff and low, “was the worst night of my life, which is funny if it wasn’t so goddamn pathetic. You see, I’ve been living in constant agony all these months, needing to be close to you and yet forcing myself not to. Because I knew if I was given even the slightest chance to kiss you again, to be with you like I want to, I would do it without hesitation. I really thought the misery and torment that I was under couldn’t get any worse. And then it did. It got so fucking worse.”
Jude grabs my hands and pulls me away from the door, guiding me back to my bed and sitting me on his lap. With one hand holding onto my waist, he skitters his hand into my hair until it’s cupping my cheek.
“When that fucker took you, I thought I was losing my mind. Just thinking of what he could be doing to you… his hands on you… hurting you. I had to kill the fucker fast since I was too afraid of what I might do to him with you watching. I didn’t want you to think I was a monster.”
“I could never think that,” I tell him.
It’s all true.
He could have set Pavlin aflame and danced around his burning carcass, and I would still think Jude to be the most decent man who ever entered my life.
“I’m not so sure that I am anymore,” he says, his penetrating gaze silencing all my words. He runs his thumb lightly on my bruised, purple cheek, moving to my split bottom lip after, groaning when I flinch with a wince. His eyes then track the necklace around my neck, pulling at it until the chessboard pendant lies flat at the center of his hand.
“I thought I was about to burn the whole of England if I didn’t find you in time. I’d fucking burn the entire world for you, Mina.”
My chest aches at his words, but it is the truth behind them, swimming in his eyes, that really takes my breath away.
“Is that why you’re here? To ease whatever misplaced guilt you’re feeling over the thoughts that crossed your mind while I was kidnapped?” I ask, wanting to know the true reason behind his visit.
“No.” He shakes his head. “I can live with the guilt. What I can’t live with anymore is not showing you how I truly feel.”
With those words, he leans in and presses a soft kiss on my lips, ever so delicate to avoid my cuts. I wrap my arms around him and let him kiss me, craving him just as fiercely as he seems to crave me after such a traumatic experience. After my lips are good and swollen from Jude’s kiss, he pulls his mouth off mine to pepper sweet kisses on my chin, neck, and shoulder. I watch breathlessly as he helps me out of my tank top so he can use that same tantalizing mouth on my bare breast. I squirm on his lap when he starts sucking a nipple into his mouth, grazing it with his teeth. I feel his bulge harden beneath me, my stomach coiling with the familiar sensation of want and desire.
I call out his name, relinquishing my nipple from his mouth with a loud pop before looking up at me.
I don’t have to say a word as it’s all there in my eyes.
What I need.
What I want.
What I deserve after years of waiting for him.
Jude lifts us off the bed to place me on top of it.
“Are you sure?” he asks, his lids turning half-mast.
“Yes.”
That’s all he needs to hear to lift us off the bed and lay me sprawled on top of it. Ever so gently, he helps me take off my pajama bottoms, followed by my panties, leaving me completely naked on the bed, save for the cherished gold necklace he gave me for my birthday. My chest heaves up and down as I watch him take a step back to appreciate his view.
His eyes smolder as the bulge in his pants thickens.
“Now you,” I demand, longing to see all of him in his perception.
Jude pulls his white t-shirt over his head and throws it to the ground, leaving me to lick my lips at the hard ridges of his abs and mouthwatering physique. He then pulls something out of his pocket and places it on my nightstand, but I don’t dare see what it is, too enthralled by the prospect of him pulling down his gray sweatpants. However, when he does pull them down, my heart shoots up to my throat and stays there. He grabs his nine-inch cock in his hand and gives it two languid strokes before placing his knee on the bed and inching closer to me.
Excitement mixed with a tinge of fear that his cock might split me open begins to muddle my thoughts, and it takes me a second to realize that he is kissing every inch of my bruise-covered body. I don’t say a word as he continues to worship at my altar by placing one tender kiss after another.
I wasn’t expecting this.
Yes, I must have imagined Jude making love to me a million times, but I never thought it would be this sweet, especially not after our little rendezvous at the hotel. I thought it was going to be hot, fast, and dirty.
Is he taking his time because he thinks I’m broken?
Or because he knows I’ve never done this before?
Knowing Jude, it must be a little of both.
I don’t mind.
Not if he keeps kissing me like he’s doing now.
“Jude,” I call out when my heart starts racing faster than I can keep up with.
He doesn’t respond and grabs my ankles instead, lifting my knees and parting my thighs a second later.
“Argh!” I shriek out when his head falls in between my thighs, his tongue lapping at my pussy.
I entwine my fingers into his hair and let myself feel every sensation his wicked tongue provokes. And when he adds a digit into the mix, I all but combust.
“Jude,” I pant, feeling suddenly lightheaded with his deft fingers and tongue playing my body like a well-tuned instrument. And when flecks of white light start blurring my vision, I have no choice but to lift my body off the bed, yearning for a small reprieve from the euphoric feeling. Jude places his hand on my belly, pushing me down and forcing me to feel every little thing he does.
I pull the pillow behind my head to cover my face and scream into it as my orgasm hits me with such force that it feels like I’ll go blind from it.
But all too soon, I feel Jude push the pillow away, his eyes burning with devoted desperation before crashing his lips on mine. Even though it hurts like hell, I let his mouth overpower mine, loving how I can taste myself on the tip of his tongue.
He then breaks the kiss, still breathing heavily from it, his naked body now hovering over mine.
“Are you sure?” he asks, searching my face for any doubt I may still have.
“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”
His eyes burn with unrepentant lust as he stretches his arm to the side over to my nightstand. When I see him place a condom wrapper into his mouth to rip it open, I snatch it away from his teeth and throw it away.
“No. I either have all of you or none of you.”
“Mina—”
“If you’re worried I’ll get pregnant, then don’t be. My Aunt Pippa put me on the pill the minute I had my first period.”
“Are you sure?” he asks again, though by the reaction of his cock doubling in size, he’ll enjoy fucking me without a condom just fine.
“I’m sure. Are you?” I counter back.
“You tell me,” he says with a shy smile before rubbing the head of his cock through my soaked slit.
I bite into my bottom lip and wince in pain when my teeth graze the cut. Jude’s gaze softens, lowering his head to place light kisses on the cut.
“I’m not broken,” I say, needing him to know that.
“No, you’re not,” he affirms with conviction. “You’re a fighter. A survivor,” he adds, placing another kiss, pride seeping through his voice.
“What else am I?” I probe further, loving the sound of his voice in my ear.
“You’re the most maddening, beautiful woman I’ve ever met. The same woman that has bewitched me from the day she threatened to release her dogs on me.”
I pull the hair out of his eyes so I can lose myself in them.
“I would have never done it.”
“Liar.”
“I’m serious. I never would have done it. From the start, I knew you were different—special. I just didn’t realize then how important you’d become to me.”
I take a shallow breath, my heart pounding as I finally say the words that have been lodged in my throat for what feels like forever.
“I love you. I think, from the moment I saw you, I always have.”
His Adam’s apple bobs a mile a minute as he reads the truth of my words plastered all over my face.
“Look at me… just… look at me,” he begs in reply, pushing the crown of his cock at my center, inch by tortuous inch.
My nails sink into his bare shoulders, branding him as mine just as his cock is determined to brand me as his.
Jude’s gaze never wavers from mine as he continues to push slowly through until his shaft has reached the hilt.
“Am I hurting you?” he asks in utter agony.
“No. Don’t stop,” I encourage, remembering about hurting a bit the first time.
“I’m going to move now, love. Tell me if it gets to be too much for you.”
I nod, keeping my gaze locked with his for courage.
Jude then slowly thrusts himself inside me, ever so delicately, until my pussy has molded itself to his size.
“How does that feel?” he asks after managing to place his hand between us, using his fingers to draw circles on my clit.
“Good. That feels really good,” I pant.
The intensity of it all grows to a boiling point when his thrusts begin to speed up in tandem with his fingers’ ministrations.
“Does it feel good to you?”
“Fuck, Mina, don’t ask me shit like that,” he grunts, sweat covering his brow as he keeps up to his exhilarating tempo.
“Is that a no?”
“Fuck, no!” he growls, finally losing his cool. “I could fucking live in this pussy. Fuck. You feel so good. So fucking good.”
“Keep talking,” I moan out loudly when his words start driving me just as insane as his cock and fingers.
“What do you want to hear, sweetheart?” he asks, his voice dropping to a seductive octave. “Do you want to hear me say that I’ve dreamed about taking your cherry more times than I can count? That I lie awake at night beating my cock into submission with memories of you, legs spread open for me back in that godforsaken hotel room? That to this day, I have to force myself to stay away or fuck you in every room of this goddamn house? Is that what you want to hear, love? Or that anytime I so much as look at you, all I want to do is kiss that smart mouth of yours and claim it as mine.”
“Ah!” I yell out in ecstasy, forcing him to cover my mouth with his to muffle my lust-filled wails.
“Not happening, love,” he says after breaking our kiss, but not before ensuring I won’t cry out again. “No way am I going to run the risk of your psycho cousins busting into this room. Not now when your pussy is clenching around my cock so fucking fantastically.”
White stars blind my vision as he keeps thrusting into me like a man gone mad.
It’s all too much.
Too much.
And before I can stop it, a second orgasm hits me like a tidal wave, bashing into me in a way that will forever change the fabric of my very being.
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” Jude praises in agony before swallowing up my loud cries with another ardent kiss, pounding into me until he’s the one falling off the precipice.
When his body stills over mine, I wrap my arms around him and hold him tight, wanting to keep him close for fear that he might disappear.
This… this was all I ever imagined it would be, and then some. But if he leaves, I don’t think my heart could withstand it.
Jude then shifts in my embrace, and I reluctantly let go of my hold on him. I let out a relieved breath when he lies beside me, pulling me closer until my head is perched on top of his chest.
“Sleep, love. Your body needs to rest after such a day.”
As the words stumble out of his mouth, my eyelids become heavy, giving in to the exhaustion of being kidnapped by the Bratva and Jude’s lovemaking.
With a smile on my face, I don’t fight it any longer and let myself succumb to my slumber.
When the rays of a new dawn filter through the corner of my eyes, I start to awaken. I become even more alert when I realize I’m the only one lying in bed. I sit up, holding the bed sheet to my chest, and see Jude, fully dressed, watching over me at the far corner of the room, right next to the door.
“Did I wake you?” His voice is quiet, but there’s something heavy in it, something that tightens my chest. The serious expression stitched across his face sends a ripple of unease through me.
“No.” I search his eyes. “Are you leaving?”
He nods.
A lump forms in my throat. “Will you come back?”
He exhales slowly as if the world’s weight has settled onto his shoulders again.
I lean in closer, my pulse pounding in my ears.
“Jude… will you come back to me?”
His head lifts, his gaze locking onto mine. The misery is there again, darkening the beautiful hue of his eyes, drowning him in some unspoken torment he refuses to profess.
Then, in a voice rough with a truth he wishes he could deny, he says, “Yes, love. I’ll come back. I don’t see how I can stop myself now.”