Chapter 25 Gwen
GWEN
A FEW WEEKS LATER
This was my first major holiday at the ranch.
I’d arrived just after the new year. So grateful to be out of the position I was in, I’d never given much thought to what the festivities here would look like. Now that I was witnessing it, only one word could describe it: magical.
So many women filled the cafeteria, our Thanksgiving was like a concert for the world’s biggest pop star.
Sebastian and Lizzie met me at the doors.
Simone saved a table big enough for all of us—Delilah, Rhiannon, Axel, Junie, Sebastian, Lizzie, and me.
Once Sebastian, Lizzie, and I filled plates with the basics for the table—turkey, mac & cheese, green bean casserole, cranberry sauce, and pumpkin pie—we weaved through the crowd to join the rest of them.
Honey sat at Simone’s feet, giving her a look I knew well. One that said, See? I’m waiting patiently for my next snack.
“Aw, no drinks?” Junie asked, surveying our smorgasbord.
Sebastian grumbled something under his breath, barely able to juggle the mound of turkey and mac & cheese he already held.
Laughing, I sat across from her. “Didn’t you bring your juice boxes?”
“Yeah, but Mommy shared them with everybody.” She crossed her arms against her chest. “And mine’s empty.”
“Everybody else shares with you.” Simone tugged her in and planted a kiss above her braided pigtails. “It’s not empty yet anyway. Finish it off, then we’ll go and find another drink.”
Junie pouted some more, picking at the mac & cheese Sebastian laid before her.
“Hey, Rhiannon?” Delilah poked her head around Axel, looking for her at the head of the table. “Is it okay if I brought a dish? I wasn’t sure if that was allowed. It’s not enough for everyone, but I eat it every Thanksgiving, and I wanted you guys to try it.”
“Of course it’s okay.” Rhiannon propped her elbows on the table, lined with a paper cloth decorated in hand turkeys and cornucopias. I hoped they were cornucopias, anyway. The kids at the daycare had created the masterpiece. “What is it, honey?”
Grinning ear to ear, Delilah stretched below her into an insulated shopping bag. She came back up with an aluminum dish covered in a plastic lid. “Just my grandma’s pecan pie. It’s nothing special, really.”
“I’ll be the judge of that.” Lizzie stretched across the table for it.
As Lizzie cut into it with a plastic knife, Rhiannon said, “I’m sure it’s amazing, sweetheart. Thanks for bringing it.”
Cheeks bright red, Delilah waved her off. “It’s the least I can do. I’m just so grateful to be here. Thank you again. For everything.”
“I think the point of today is to thank any and everyone.” Simone swayed around Axel to meet Delilah’s gaze. “So thank you for the pie and thank you for joining us.”
Delilah’s blush stayed in place, but she smiled as she rubbed her hands over her arms.
“I could go for a beer,” Sebastian said, spooning some mashed potatoes onto his plate.
“You and me both.” Axel covered his mouth between chews. “If you’re getting up, mind getting me one?”
“And some extra plates,” Lizzie said, struggling to cut through the pecan crust. “Maybe a real knife too. Oh, and a couple of napkins? Preferably some wet ones?”
Shoulders sinking, Sebastian grunted with annoyance. “Anything else, your highness?”
I laughed and started to stand. “Come on. Four hands are better than two.”
He ushered me back down. “No, no. You sit. I’ll just grab one of those carts from the back.” Standing, he looked around the table. “Anybody else need anything?”
“Well, if you’re getting a cart…” Smiling, I batted my eyelashes. Already defeated, he smiled and waited for me to go on. “Glass of wine, please?”
“Red or white?”
“Red. And sweet.”
“Can you get my drink too?” Junie asked.
“Guessing that’s not wine, huh?” Sebastian asked Simone.
Now it was Simone’s shoulders sinking. Sighing, she stood. “Come on, kid. Let’s get your drink.”
“The kitchen’s chaos right now,” Rhiannon said, standing as well. “I’ll get you the cart, but you’re loading it, and you’re pushing it.”
“Yes, ma’am.” Sebastian planted a kiss on the top of my head. “I’ll be back.”
“I’ll be here.” We exchanged another one of those sweet expressions as he headed into the sea of people with Rhiannon.
That left me, Delilah, Lizzie, and Axel. I said, “And then there were four.”
Axel glanced at Delilah, then Lizzie. “Shit, would one of you mind doing me another favor?”
“What do you need?” Delilah asked.
“I’ve got to head out in a couple of minutes to plow Main Street.” He reached into his pocket and held out his keys. “Mind starting the truck for me?”
“Yeah, sure.” Delilah gave him a pat on the back as she stood. “Where’s it at?”
“The back alley,” Axel said.
Smiling awkwardly, Delilah’s cheeks got red again. “And where might that be?”
“I’m waiting on a good knife anyway.” Lizzie stood, waving in a come-here motion over her shoulder. “Come on. I’ll show you.”
“You’re the best,” Delilah said, holding on to Lizzie’s shoulders so they wouldn’t get separated in the crowd.
And then there were two.
“Probably shouldn’t be drinking on the job,” I said to Axel.
“I’ll drink it when I get back.” He wiped some food from his lip, eyes unusually heavy against me. “Simone healed up nicely.”
My stomach twisted. I cleared my throat. “Yeah, she looks good.”
“Didn’t look too good that day though.” He took a sip from his water on the table. “I imagine, anyway. Since that’s the day you lied to me.”
Shit. I figured this moment would come eventually. Honestly, I’d been dodging him ever since it happened, because Axel wasn’t the type of guy to drop a grudge.
“Look, I just did what she asked me to. She didn’t want anyone to know, so—”
“You did it really well. The lying, I mean.” Elbows on the table, leaning in, Axel lowered his voice. “You did what you had to. To protect your friend. I respect that.”
Not where I thought this was going.
He posed those words so carefully. As if he’d rehearsed them. There was something in his inflection that sounded familiar. The blunt nature of it. How poised and blank his face was.
Like the texts had been.
Was this his way of confirming my suspicion? Was he saying, in so many words, that he was the anonymous friend who helped me get rid of David’s body?
“Well, like you said.” I crossed my arms and laid them on the table as well. “I did what I had to.”
“Right.” His eyes flicked between mine. “We’ve all done things we aren’t proud of, but we had to. That’s the nature of this place, isn’t it?”
That tightness in my stomach softened. This was it, wasn’t it?
The texter was obsessed with their anonymity.
If the roles were reversed, I would be too.
If I was the one who’d gotten rid of the body, if I only wanted to make sure the tracks I covered weren’t uncovered by the person who did it, this was how I would address it.
I would dance around the point I was trying to make, hoping they understood.
Maybe this was the closest I would ever get to confirmation that the anonymous texter was on my side.
“I guess so,” I said. “Have you ever done anything like that? Lied about something huge because you had no other choice?”
“I’ve done worse than lied.” A crooked half smile. “I mean, I know Simone didn’t tell you where David was after that went down. But he couldn’t have made it very far. If I would’ve shown in that moment, that prick would’ve never walked again.”
There it was.
For a few heartbeats, we just stared at one another. Knowing. Understanding.
He wouldn’t admit to his part, and I wouldn’t admit to mine.
But we both loved Simone. We would do anything to protect her or anyone else in this place. That was Axel’s job title, after all. Security.
I would never know beyond any doubt, but sitting here, holding his gaze, was the most secure I had felt since that first text had appeared on my screen.
“Good thing we all have each other’s backs around here,” was what I managed in response.
“I’ll drink to that.” Standing, Axel nodded to someone behind me. “I’m gonna go clear Main. Don’t drink that by the time I get back.”
“I’ll grab you another if I do.” Sebastian looked over the overflowing lunch-lady cart he pushed. “Where the hell did Lizzie go?”
“Just started up the truck for Axel.” Clearing my throat, I forced a smile. “Where is that wine?”
I couldn’t express my relief.
It was Axel. And we agreed—everyone at the ranch had each other’s backs. If I had to guess, he’d seen me in David’s car—or followed me to the creek to be certain it was handled—saw the body float, and brought it back to the ranch. There, he put all those tools in the garage to use.
No body, no crime.
I was gonna get away with this, Axel was why, and I could finally breathe.
Finally, I could bask in all the good things I had going now. Like Simone and Junie’s safety. Like my new friendship with Delilah. Like Sebastian.
I’d been so afraid to fall, for him to learn who I was, for everything we were building to crash down around me. But maybe I was finally safe, too. Maybe I could relax my shoulders and let out a deep breath.
Life felt so good after that chat with Axel, days passed when I forgot what I had even done to David.
It only resurfaced at group.
Whenever I heard a woman tell her story, or watched her cry at the memories, that torment lit a familiar fire in me.
Simone had asked to talk about it a couple times.
Some of the time, she just wanted to talk about her own feelings.
Her frustration that he had shown. Her regret over not having gone to Rhiannon with it to begin with.
The fear of one day having to explain any of it to Junie.
As well as her relief that he was gone, and that he would never come back.
Then she’d ask me about my own feelings.
I could never answer, because I feared the way she would look at me if I told her the truth.