June
A History of Meadowcraig by Jesy Pattinson – Draft One
(Introduction)
You’d be forgiven for not recognising the name Meadowcraig.
It doesn’t sit on the main road, and you’d have to strain your eyes to find it on a map. It’s one of those blink, and you’ll miss it places, tucked away in the Scottish Highlands.
I consider myself very lucky to have grown up here.
Not only for the spectacular views, though you’ll find plenty. Nor for the slower pace of life that makes you stop and take pause.
Instead, I am lucky to be one small part of a vast history that makes up these lands.
Like most places, Meadowcraig has changed with time. Roads have widened, and old paths have softened under foot. Modern life has crept into our buildings (thank you, plumbing!), and into our local economy (boo for corporations).
But what hasnt been taken is our past.
The bones of Meadowcraig have always endured. The hills still loom, the loch still surrounds us, and the people who came before us left their mark in a way that cannot be denied.
This book is not about adventure or spectacle. Meadowcraig’s history is not found in grand events, but in the ordinary people who lived here. In the families who built, rebuilt, and stayed generations later.
From the first feet to roam these lands, to the community that thrives here today, and everything in between, these are the stories of Meadowcraig, and the people who cared to remember them.
Blah, blah, blah. And into chapter one.
6 Jun | From: Jesy Pattinson | To: Brian Trainer
Subject: Thoughts?
Attachment: DraftOne.Doc
Keep in mind that if you don’t tell me how fantastic this is, I will undoubtedly cry.
You have received an instant message from:
PENNY
Penny: Jesy!!
Penny: You’re so clever!
Jesy: You read it then?
Penny: Aye. And I showed my ma’. She’s asking if she can buy it already.
Jesy: Steady on, Eilidh, I’ve got to write the thing first!
Penny: Better crack on then, hen. I bet she’s not the only person waiting.
Jesy: It really was good?
Penny: Aye! You know me, I was never very good at history. But I’d read your book. And not just because I love you.
ISLA has entered the conversation
Isla: Yes! Our Jesy. Author extraordinaire! I loved it! I swear I’m going to stock it at the inn as soon as it’s published.
Jesy: Steady on, Isla. I’ve got to write the thing first!
Isla: What you still doing talking to us then?! I showed Ewan, and he called you a swot. He said Mr Hodges isn’t around to give you a gold star anymore, so you don’t need to show off.
Isla: I pretended I knew what he was talking about, and he said he couldn’t imagine anyone more perfect than you to tell the history of Meadowcraig.
Penny: Ha! Good old Mr Hodges.
Isla: Okay, who the fuck is Mr Hodges?
Penny: Our history teacher with a hard-on for Jesy.
Isla: WHAT?
Isla: And I’m just hearing about this now?
Jesy: God, Pen. Way to get a guy condemned. He did not have a hard-on for me. He just encouraged my learning.
Penny: While having a hard-on for you.
Jesy: Penny! He was like fifty-five when he taught us.
Penny: In his prime, then.
Jesy: You’re gross. You can’t say things like that. Especially when they’re not true. You could get him into trouble.
Penny: Okay, okay.
Penny: He did like you, though.
Jesy: Well, sure. I didn’t nod off during his lessons.
Isla: Ewan says you’re a swot.
Jesy: Bite me, Calder.
Jesy: Seriously, though. You think I should keep going?
Isla: You should absolutely keep going. Let me know if you need any old pictures of the inn. And Ewan says his parents have a bunch of old pictures from when they were kids.
Jesy: I’ll take you up on that if I ever finish it.
Penny: You will finish it.
Penny: Tell the world about Meadowcraig, Jes. I can’t imagine anyone else doing a better job.
7 Jun | From: Brian Trainer | To: Jesy Pattinson
Subject: RE: Thoughts?
I sat with it for a day and read it over a bunch of times. And at risk of making you cry, it’s not fantastic.
Now, before you lose your mind, let it be known, it is brilliant.
You’ve got a great voice, you paint a beautiful picture, and you can tell immediately that you’re proud of the place you call home.
You’ve missed a typo or two (hasn’t should have an apostrophe), but considering this is a first draft, that’s no big deal.
The only issue I have with it is your title.
A History of Meadowcraig is boring and generic. It feels like you’re about to info dump on me, rather than take me on a journey through history.
You’re not a lecturer. You’re a storyteller. Make your title reflect that.
Meadowcraig Stories, for example, and just off the top of my head. I’m sure you can come up with better.
I’m proud of you, Jesy! I think you can really make something out of this.
Jesy
I ignore the now familiar ping of my phone alerting me to a new email, chewing on the tip of my thumb as I watch Jerry’s eyes dart across the page in his hand.
He doesn’t know about my little project yet, and I don’t know why I waited so long to tell him. But with Isla and Penny’s reactions ringing in my ears, I feel brave enough to share.
“You wrote this?” he asks, looking at me over the top of the page.
I nod, chewing my lip. His face is giving nothing away. “Aye, I did. What do you think?”
“What for?”
For a minute, I’m confused. “What for?”
“Why did you write it?”
“Oh. I say right there in the introduction, I want to write a book.”
“I see.”
My heart is thumping in my chest. If he says he doesn’t like it, I might end up pulling a toddler sized tantrum right here in the middle of the living room.
“It’s good writing, sweetheart,” he says, and relief floods my body.
“You really think so?” I ask with a smile, reaching for the page.
“Aye. You always were talented.”
What was I even worried about? Who else is going to support me better than my own husband? I mean, for all his flaws, he really knows when I need a—
“But is now the right time to be writing a book?”
Oh, no.
“Wh-what do you mean?”
“I just don’t know if this is the best use of your time right now. With Dad and everything.”
“I’m managing just fine so far.”
“You’re doing beautifully, sweetheart. But you’re not distracted right now.”
“I wrote this and still managed everything else.”
“Sure,” Jerry says with a nod, and I hate that he sounds so reasonable. “But this is nothing. If you were to commit to this book, you’d have to do research. You’d have to travel back and forth. You’d be locked away in your office and completely absent.”
“I know how to prioritise,” I say in a small voice. And I hate how pathetic I sound but I so needed his support. I needed him to tell me he was excited for me.
His lips are moving, and I force myself to pay attention, only catching the end of his sentence.
“…I’m not saying never. Just not right now.”
“Okay,” I hear myself saying, turning away and looking down at the words I’d worked so hard on.
A History of Meadowcraig, by Jesy Pattinson.
Amazing. Before this conversation, those small three words made me feel incredible. By Jesy Pattinson. That’s me. And this is… was my book.
Now reading them back, I can feel my face flame.
What an idiot I was for thinking I could do this. If my own husband doesn’t believe in me, how can I expect anyone else to?
And he very clearly doesn’t believe in me despite his attempts to butter me up. If he did, he wouldn’t use such a poor excuse such as time to dissuade me. Time is the one thing I have in abundance.
“Can you help me find my tie, sweetheart?” Jerry asks from behind me. “And then Dad needs his meds.”
“You got it,” I say, scrunching up the sheet of paper into a tight ball. “Check the bedroom. I’ll be there in a moment.”
I won’t cry. I will not cry.
Remembering the ping from my phone, I open my emails, my eyes scanning Brian’s response and lingering, just for a moment.
I’m proud of you, Jes!
Okay. Maybe I’m gonna cry a little.
I swallow past the lump in my throat and pocket my phone. I carefully smooth the paper out, fingers tracing the words, my words, and smile.
Maybe not right now.
But soon.
7 Jun | From: Jesy Pattinson | To: Brian Trainer
Subject: RE: Thoughts?
Aw, yay!
I’m glad you liked it. And thank you for your feedback. If I ever go back to it, I’ll make sure to fix that typo.
You have received an instant message from:
brIAN
Brian: If?
Jesy: Aye. It was a fun little afternoon project, but I can’t see myself actually writing a book.
Brian: Why not?
Brian: If it was my lack of enthusiasm, let me make it clear, I DO think it’s fantastic. I was just doing a bit.
Jesy: Oh, no, Brian. You haven’t done or said anything.
Brian: Did you show anyone else?
Jesy: No. Just you.
Brian: Show them.
Brian: Penny, Isla, your parents, Jerry. Show them all. Because they’ll all say the same thing as me. You should do this.
Jesy: And if they don’t?
Brian: Fuck ‘em.
Brian: The only person you need to believe in you is yourself, and the fact you wrote that introduction tells me you do.
Brian: But there’s nothing wrong with a bit of encouragement from your loved ones. Which I know they’ll give because in no universe is this a bad idea.
Jesy: C’mon, Brian.
Jesy: I don’t have time to write a book.
Brian: You do.
Brian: You told me you do.
Jesy: Nah. The writing bit I could manage. But the travelling back and forth, the constant research, locking myself away in an office.
Brian: But just a few months ago, you already were travelling back and forth for your job. You managed then, why not now?
Jesy: Things change.
Brian: I don’t understand.
Jesy: You don’t have to, Brian. I know you mean well, but trust me when I say, I can’t do this right now.
Note to self.
Brian was right. This is soul crushing.
13 Jun | From: Brian Trainer | To: Jesy Pattinson
Subject: Weird gift.
Potentially strange question, but have you Googled me?
13 Jun | From: Jesy Pattinson | To: Brian Trainer
Subject: RE: Weird gift
I think the more pressing question is, have you not Googled me??