Chapter 6 #2
By instinct, I go to move, forgetting about Summer, but Benny is straight on his feet too.
‘I’ll go,’ he says. ‘You warm up.’
I suspect he’s trying to give me space to work out if I want to talk, and if so, where to possibly start, so I don’t object, sinking back into the sofa.
The weariness feels endless and while it’s not the same as the exhaustion that came from life in the slums, or the endless battles during the Retterheld, it has its similarities.
It’s bone-deep. All-consuming. It clouds my brain with a fog that only lets me see glimpses of my future. One that is devoid of hope. Of family.
‘Rose!’ Benny’s shout breaks through my melancholy. ‘It’s Kay!’
Every other emotion I feel evaporates and I’m up and running to her without thought. Sure enough, framed by the door is my beautiful little sister. Despite my despair and worry over her the last day, she looks radiant.
She’s still dressed in the ballgown she wore the night before. And next to her is Jonas.
‘Where have you been?’ I ask, flying towards her, ready to crush her in pure relief, yet as I move closer something catches my eye.
My fingers curl into my palms.
Kay has only ever worn one ring: a simple band with an iridescent pale blue stone, which belonged to our mother. She lost it when she was taken to the forest during the second trial.
Yet at that moment, there are three equal-width rings placed across her middle three fingers, so perfectly aligned they look like a single sheet of metal.
Representing the past, present, and future.
Three rings. The symbol of marriage in Morathka.
Oh Gods. What the hell has she done?
My eyes meet hers, and there’s nothing but pure stubbornness in them. Stubbornness and perhaps a hint of pride, too.
As my gaze shifts from her to Jonas, I note that he is wearing matching wedding rings, and my jaw drops.
‘What the fuck have you two done?’
Jonas. Kay has married Jonas.
A man who, only hours ago, I almost murdered with a power I have no control over.
A man who kept our brother’s existence from us.
A man I spent moons getting to know – or at least thinking I knew – in the crucible of the Retterheld, whose own father proposed to her, and Kay didn’t even consider discussing the matter with me?
Incredulity and hurt thrum in my chest, and in that split second, I wish with all my heart that I could be anywhere but here.
‘Rose?’ Benny’s voice reaches me, thin and far away. And then, before I can take another breath, the world tilts.
Where I was and what I was doing no longer seem to matter. All that exists is the here and now. This moment. I’m consumed by it. Though what it is, I have no idea.
The blackness that I first disappear into lasts less than a heartbeat as pinpricks of light before me grow ever larger.
I’m soaring.
Not metaphorically. Physically. At least, that’s what it feels like.
I’m not in my own body.
Instead, I’m miles above the ground, looking down on buildings and rooftops with veins of streets snaking between them, everything small and doll-like, and feeling the rush of air as I sweep through it all.
A sense of freedom I didn’t know existed fills me.
The rain is pouring, rain that falls from odd-coloured clouds, but I do not care. The water slides off my wings without impact.
Without warning, my vision swoops down, and I plummet towards one of the buildings. For a split second, I think I’m going to collide with the roof, but I slow just in time, and the rush of air lessens as I draw to a complete stop.
I’m on a windowsill, I realise, peering in through the glass.
It takes me a moment to realise what I’m looking at. Or rather, who.
Me, in Benny’s arms. As I watch, he places me on a sofa.
‘Rose!’ Benny shouts my name in pure panic as he jostles my shoulders, gently at first, and then harder. When he moves to shake me for a third time, the motion ripples through my body and I open my eyes to find his face inches from mine.
The weight is instant, as if my body is made of lead, when only moments ago it was feather-light. And the pressure in my chest – the one that has refused to leave for longer than I can remember – returns. For a moment, I felt … free.
‘Thank the Gods,’ Benny gasps. ‘You’re back.’
‘I … I …’ I begin but then fall silent. Rather than trying to respond, I turn my head to the great glass window that looks out onto the courtiers’ arc, not sure what I’m expecting to see. But there is nothing.
‘I’m okay. It was just the shock, that’s all,’ I finally manage as I push away from Benny and twist around so that I’m sitting up … and looking straight at my sister.
‘Your eyes.’ Kay swallows, her eyes wide and harsh with suspicion. ‘They were white, Rose. What did you do?’
‘What did I do?’
Silence sweeps the room, so tense I can feel it burning into the marrow of my bones.
Is she really going to start accusing me of things when she’s the one who turned up here wearing bloody wedding rings?
It doesn’t matter how glad I am to see her, this side of my sister is getting harder and harder to deal with, and I find myself in desperate need of someone to interject before I say something I won’t be able to take back.
As if reading my thoughts, Benny steps into the void. ‘Rose, honey, I don’t want to be the one to mansplain your own powers to you … but … maybe you need to take a moment. Take a few breaths.’
I turn to my friend, unsure what he’s talking about until I notice his breath hovering in the air. The temperature has dropped to freezing, yet I hadn’t noticed.
The windows, I realise with a start, are all glazing over with ice.
Fuck.
‘We need to talk about this,’ Jonas interjects, but before I can tell him this is none of his business and he needs to kindly fuck off, Summer appears in the doorway with a look of surprise on her face.
‘Lady Rose … you have guests! Is there anything I can do?’
My sister swivels around to face the maid. ‘Who are you?’
‘This is Summer,’ I stress her name, ‘our new help. She’s been wonderful, assisting me greatly.’ Unlike some who just fucked off and got married.
Offering the maid what I hope she knows is a genuine smile, I reply to her initial question. ‘Perhaps you could prepare us all some dinner?’ I suggest. I’m keen to get her out of the room before she spots the ice on the window.
‘Of course, m’lady. I’ll clear the dining room.’ She bobs a curtsey that makes me grimace and then bustles off.
Silence follows. Silence I have no intention of breaking.
‘So we should probably talk about it,’ Jonas begins.
‘You think?’ I spit, only for Benny to step between us.
‘Actually, maybe now isn’t the right time to do this,’ he says softly, his eyes on me.
‘Sorry?’ I snap back, eyes narrowing.
Benny rests his hand on my shoulder. ‘I’m saying this for you, Rose,’ he murmurs to me so softly, it’s as though we’re the only ones in the room.
‘You’ve had a rough couple of days, and you were out all day today.
You need to rest. You also need to make sure you don’t do or say something you’ll regret. ’
Would I regret killing Jonas? At this precise moment, I’m not sure, but I know why Benny’s counselling caution. My magic is dangerous – deadly to those around me and to me if Korvane finds out about it.
My magic has already gone haywire once this morning, and I can’t risk another flare-up. Benny’s right.
Besides, if I’m going to kill Jonas, it’s going to be a clear-headed, with-my-own-bare-hands type of murder.
‘I want him out of my house,’ I hiss, looking past Benny and straight to Jonas.
Kay opens her mouth to protest, but Benny gets there first.
‘I shall escort him out myself,’ he says. ‘You need rest, Rose. Go upstairs. I’ll bring you your food. Once he’s left.’
Kay glares at me, folding her arms across her chest. ‘If Jonas goes, I’m going too.’
‘No, you’re not.’ I’m surprised to hear the words grind out from Benny’s mouth rather than mine.
‘Your sister won the Retterheld yesterday – the greatest honour there is. She earned back your family’s home, wealth, and powers.
And yet, after everything she’s been through, you let her spend her first night here – in rooms full of heartache – on her own.
You will not be leaving here tonight, and believe me, you do not want to test me on this. ’
When I first arrived at the barracks, I noted the way the other islanders defaulted to Benny. Noticed his quiet leadership. But there’s nothing quiet about this. It’s pure command. And strangely, it reminds me of Kyor. The only difference is that it’s my side Benny’s standing on.
Rather than responding herself, Kay looks to Jonas, as if she’s expecting him to fight the future Duke of the Eastern Isles. It just shows how woefully little she knows about her husband.
Jonas purses his lips. ‘Perhaps it would be better if I went tonight,’ he says quietly, his tone conciliatory. ‘I will return in the morning and we will talk then.’
Kay’s disappointment shows in the pout of her lips.
‘Fine,’ she sniffs. ‘But I’m going to bed too. And don’t worry about bringing me any food,’ she says with a withering glance at Benny. ‘I seem to have lost my appetite entirely.’
Her eyes linger on me for a moment longer before she turns on her heel and marches out of the room.
As her footsteps pad down the hallway and up the stairs, I turn to Jonas, who immediately shrinks away, his hand on his chest as if he’s worried I might suddenly freeze the air in his lungs again.
‘I’m going. Don’t worry, I’m going,’ he says before scuttling away. Only when we hear the front door close does Benny turn to look at me and blow out a long sigh.
‘Don’t take this the wrong way, but I’m starting to think your sister might have got on scarily well with Zara.’
I snort, but then the quiet closes in again.