21. Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-One
Raif
R aif can’t believe he’s telling her this, that he’s a virgin. He knows it seems crazy for a thirty-three-year-old man not to have had sex yet. She’s looking at him a little strangely, and he goes to pull his hand away from hers, worried that he’s scared her.
“Raif, I didn’t mean it to seem like a bad thing. I’m just surprised, is all.”
She takes his hand in both of hers, rubbing her thumbs along the back as if to soothe him.
“Can I ask? What have you done?”
“Sexually?”
She nods her head yes, and he takes a deep breath.
“There’s a woman, Sandy. She runs the diner with her parents. She kissed me once. It didn’t feel right.” He looks down at his lap. The thought makes him cringe.
“Hey, it’s okay. Was she your first kiss?”
“Yes, I was just so lonely.”
Her smile is soft. His perfect mate. He should have known she would understand.
“Have you tried kissing anyone else? Anyone you’re interested in?” she asks him.
“No,” he shakes his head and looks at her.
She looks mystified, perplexed. Like she can’t believe what he’s saying to her.
“Why?”
He thinks for a moment. He wants to tell her she’s his mate. That he knew instantly that she was the other half of his soul, and he would never want anyone ever again.
“Because I only wanted to be with you.”
Her eyes get wide, and she pulls her hand back. This is it. This is when she gets up and leaves, and he never sees her again.
In a flash, she’s moving towards him, her warm lips pressing against his.
She’s kissing him. It’s like tasting her scent.
It’s warm citrus and cloves. He moans into the kiss, shameless in how much he wants her.
He licks her bottom lip tentatively, and she opens up so nicely for him, letting him explore her mouth with his tongue.
It’s not like kissing Sandy, which is the only experience he has to draw from.
It’s deep and long. He kisses her till he can’t breathe and pulls away to rest their foreheads together.
She’s panting, and as he cups her cheek, she grips his forearm and presses a kiss into his palm.
It’s more than he ever thought he would get from her. A kiss, a wonderful, amazing, passionate kiss. He can die a happy man now that he’s kissed his mate.
“Was that okay?”
Her voice is tentative, and he can’t help the laugh that bubbles up. He looks at her, and can feel the tears in his eyes. He kisses her again, deep. Running his fingers through her long brown hair.
“That was amazing,” he tells her.
He spends the rest of the day working at the lodge.
Craig, the man who was hired to help out with the groundskeeping and maintenance, keeps out of Raif’s way for the most part.
They only really cross paths when Raif is trying to access the electrical panel for a blown circuit breaker, and Craig comes around the corner, stopping in his tracks.
He looks flustered, like he didn’t expect Raif to be there, and when Raif glares at him, Craig apologizes and leaves.
He works in the lodge, fixing a broken heater in one room, a leaky faucet in another.
The faucet reminds him of Ash, whom he spent the morning kissing in his den.
It was good, better than good, wonderful.
She was soft, sweet. Their kisses were tentative at first, but soon grew passionate.
He held her close to him as they sat next to each other on the couch.
She didn’t climb into his lap, and he didn’t lay her down.
They stayed seated, just holding each other close.
Her arms around his neck, in his hair, on his chest. His hands rubbing slowly up and down her back.
It was everything he could have ever wanted and more, it was perfect.
She left when they finally came up for air.
Saying she needed to get back home, and he admitted he had work to do in the lodge.
In the afternoon, his stomach growls loudly, and he makes his way downstairs to the lodge kitchen.
Jack, his youngest brother, is there taking what looks like a large piece of meat out of the oven.
“Hey,” he greets his brother, opening the fridge to pull out some sandwich meat.
“Move, I’ll do it for you.”
Jack pushes him out of the way with his hip.
He’s in his white chef jacket, the one he got from his time in culinary school in France.
Tall and lean but still built. He’s got some scruff on his face, like he didn’t have enough time to shave that morning.
He pulls out a loaf of bread and slices it thick.
Gathering additional sides from the fridge, he starts making multiple sandwiches.
Raif just watches. He knows Jack is thinking when he’s quiet. He’s by far the loudest and most outgoing of the brothers. Axel is stoic, Raif is grumpy, Gunner is shy, and Jack is the life of any party. Their mother always said Jack was born talking. So when he’s quiet, that means something is up.
“I heard Ash stopped by.”
“Yup.”
Jack turns and looks at him when Raif doesn’t elaborate.
“And?”
“And what man? It’s none of your fucking business.”
Jack snorts and turns back to the platter of sandwiches he’s put together.
“Someone’s testy. I just wanted to know how things are going between you two love birds.”
“It’s fine. Good. She’s good. We’re good.”
“You know you can talk to me, right? I mean, I know I talk a lot, but I am a good listener too.”
Raif rolls his eyes so hard it hurts.
“You just want the deets so you can blab to Axel and Gunner.”
“Not true, bro.” Jack plops himself down across from Raif and shoves half the sandwich in his mouth.
Raif watches his younger brother devour the food.
Bear shifters eat a lot, and even though Jack is a chef, he’s not too particular about the food he puts in his mouth.
Raif takes a bite, and the sandwich isn’t half bad.
He pulls another one from the platter onto his plate, and Jack smirks, the bastard.
“It’s good. We’ve made progress. She has feelings for me, we kissed.”
“That’s great, man,” Jack reaches over and claps Raif on the shoulder. “So you’re dating now?”
“Well, no, we didn’t discuss that.”
“But you’re in a relationship, right? I mean, she’s your mate.”
“We didn’t discuss that either.”
“But she wants to be with you?”
Raif slams the sandwich down on his plate and stands.
“Let me guess, you didn’t discuss that either.”
Raif wants to reach over the counter and smack Jack, but he refrains. He knows his brother is right. She said she had feelings, well, not exactly. She said she was attracted to him. But she couldn’t be attracted to him without having feelings first, so that means she has feelings, right?