Chapter 30
Mama went all out for dinner that night.
While she cooked the biggest meal I could ever remember having - including three different main dishes, just in case someone didn't like something - Isabella helped haul everyone's gear up to "my" room, saying Cody needed to rest her arm.
The cute part was that Tanner agreed, jumping up to help her carry things.
And over dinner, we talked. Cody was a little nervous.
I could see it from the way she'd turned sweet and quiet.
Tanner was on his best behavior, acting like the sort of gentleman Mama had always told me to go for.
I snuck some food to Blue under the table, laughing each time Mama called me out for it.
When the meal was done, Isabella passed out dessert, and we all sat talking for far longer than I expected.
That evening, Cody dipped out first, saying she needed a shower.
I gave her directions through the house, making it clear she could snoop all she wanted.
In truth, I had every intention of following her, but Tanner jumped up to help Mama clean up the kitchen.
Now, there weren't no way I was gonna let my boyfriend make me look bad, so I jumped in to do the dishes.
Somewhere in there, my sister vanished to the domain of the teenage girl. I was pretty sure she'd gone to her room, so when Mama said she was headed to bed, I made sure Tanner knew his way around this massive house, and walked partway with my mama.
"I like them," she told me when we were out of earshot.
Yeah, those words? They made something swell up in my chest. "I like 'em too," I admitted. "Mama, you need to know that, because I like 'em enough I might not be riding in Nashville."
Her eyes narrowed. "José, you don't go throwing a ride for anyone, you hear me?"
"Naw, this is different," I promised. "This is more like a strike because they think Tanner's gay and Cody's a girl.
They haven't yet realized Cody's got more balls than most of the men in the Pbr, and Tanner's man enough to take care of us both.
Thing is, there's a chance no one's riding, Mama.
It'll be a good thing, because they're doing it for him. "
My mother simply turned, gently rubbing both of my upper arms. "Then you make me proud of not riding. The best way to do that is to not hide from this, José. If they come after either of your lovers, then you go after them. That's what we do for family, right?"
I nodded. "Yep. Just make sure Isabella knows Cody might not ride either? I don't want her upset because we're standing up for what's right."
"Promise, mijo." Then she stretched to kiss my cheek. "And we can't hear anything from that side of the house."
I groaned, feeling my fool face heating up. "Mama!"
She just shooed me off, but yeah, I went.
The room she called mine was over the garage.
Everyone else's were on the other side, with the living room and kitchen separating things.
Mama always said it was so she didn't have to dust as often, but I had a feeling this was her way of making sure I'd come home every so often.
I didn't wanna vape in front of Isabella. That secondhand cannabis smoke thing might get her in trouble. I wouldn't drink around my mama, because it made her real worried. Usually, when I came home, I spent my time doing a whole lot of sleeping and healing, so the space meant nothing woke me up.
This time was different.
I slipped into the massive room to hear the shower going.
For a moment I was confused, because if that was Cody, then she had to be shaving everything.
Not that I minded, but she didn't need to do that neither.
But when I saw movement out on the balcony, I realized it had to be Tanner in the shower because my rookie was looking out at the view, wearing my robe, and brushing out her wet hair.
For a moment, I stood there and just watched.
Damn, but she was beautiful. Too good for me too, but I wouldn't bitch about that.
Oddly, her looks weren't the thing I loved most about her.
Nope, that was her spine. The way she would pull in a breath to brace against the worst things - then do them anyway.
The strength it took to fight time and time again, refusing to give up.
Fuck, but I loved her. It was a feeling so strong it made my chest hurt - and not because of the nearly-healed ribs. No, this was different. Better. The best part was how she wasn't the only one who made me feel like this, and it was ok for me to have them both.
That was when she turned, flinching when she spotted me standing in the dim room, staring at her. "J.D.?"
"Sorry." I made my feet start working again as I headed over to her. "I think I just had my breath taken away."
She rolled her eyes.
So I caught her chin, then leaned in for a quick peck. "I mean it, Cody. You look real good in my world."
She gave me a little smile, then turned back to the view. "It's pretty here. I didn't expect Tennessee to look like this. It's more open than Missouri, and yet it's not flat."
"Nope," I agreed, moving to brace my hands on the railing on either side of her hips, holding her back up against my chest as I saw the property in a whole new way. "I like the hills. I love the grass, but I think I want some trees too. Maybe a couple horses?"
And the woman of my dreams leaned back, letting me hold her up. "I've always wanted a horse. Dad had to sell Mom's to pay for the bills. I think it'd be fun to learn how to chase cans."
I hadn't expected that. "Barrel racing?"
"Not competitive," she assured me. "I'm thinking like some playdays. Maybe a local rodeo. Nothing big."
"Girl, I'd barrel race with you."
That made her glance back with the biggest smile. "And Tanner will need a horse too."
"Uh, yeah," I agreed. "Fuck, he'll smoke our asses, proving boys can do it better."
Playfully, she smacked at my arm. "So you'll be a rodeo queen with me?"
"Shit," I drawled. "Cody, when I come out at Nashville? That's not something people will forget. You know that, right? We might not be real welcome."
"Don't care."
I let go of the railing to slide my hands around her waist and press closer. "But I'm not going to hide this. Never again. You two make me too happy, and it's been a real long time since I've felt like this."
"In love?" she asked, but her eyes were on the trees again, almost like she was fighting the urge to look back.
"Well, that too," I agreed. "I meant happy, but being in love with you and Tanner? Yeah, I think it's what makes it so easy to be happy. Even with all the shit they keep throwing at us, I'm still so fucking happy, Cody, because I wake up with you beside me, or him - or both."
And in my arms, she relaxed a bit. "So you love Tanner?"
"Mhm..." I leaned in to kiss the side of her neck. "And you."
Slowly, Cody turned in my arms to face me.
Reaching up, she cupped the side of my face, sliding her thumb across the edge of my beard.
"Me too. I don't know when it happened, but I think I fell for him when he held your hand in the hospital.
Or maybe it was a slow thing? I don't really know.
.." She paused, biting her lips together. "But I know when I fell for you."
My heart was doing some stupid shit in my chest. "Yeah? When?"
"When I dumped Ty. That morning, before the event even really started.
It was when you took me into that room and talked me down, telling me to put it all in my boots.
When you didn't try to talk me out of being hurt, or say it was silly.
Instead, you stepped up to help me in the one way I needed most." Her pale eyes jumped between mine.
"It just felt like I wasn't alone in the world. "
"Never," I swore. "You and me are best friends, Cody. I might not always be able to be by your side, but I will always cheer you on. No matter what."
"Is that why you're doing this in Nashville?"
I grunted because that wasn't really where I wanted this talk to go. "Not exactly. I'm doing this in Nashville because he's not gonna be alone neither. Babe, this shit Tanner's getting? It's the kind that hits a man hard, and I'd much rather they came at me than him."
Which made her huff at me. "But I get to help too! J.D., he's my boyfriend as much as yours, so don't push me out of this."
"You comin' out as polyamorous then?" I taunted.
Her brow creased. "That's a thing to come out about?"
I shrugged. "Could be. Could be that you just stop hiding it. I mean, they'll all say you're his beard otherwise, but if you're tag-teaming both of us? Well, that'd sure clear up a lot of shit too. Just means you're putting your career at risk."
"Don't." Tanner's voice made both of us turn to see him standing there in nothing but a towel.
Cody ran her eyes across his body. Me? Yeah, I had to reach down and make a little adjustment before things got bent the wrong way. Tanner noticed - both of us - and a little smile took over his lips, but that boy of ours just leaned against the doorjamb.
"Cody," he said, glancing quickly at me before giving her his full attention, "if you get pulled into our mess, it could destroy everything you've worked for this year. You're already being punished for being a woman. To be promiscuous as well? Because we all know what they'll really say."
"Slut," I grumbled.
"Don't care," Cody said, stepping back and over so we could all face each other.
"See, Dad said something, and I've been thinking about exactly what it means.
He keeps reminding me I can do everything you boys can.
Well, doesn't that mean you boys can do everything I can?
And if I was making out with a girl for my boyfriend, do you think anyone would bitch?
No! Hell, isn't that exactly what Wes was getting at last night? "
"I mean, she has a point," I told Tanner.
He tipped his head, proving he heard me, but said, "And I'm not the one stuck in Missouri, claiming riding bulls is my only way out. J.D. isn't the one fighting to prove he deserves respect."
"But he will be," Cody countered. "And you, Tanner? Do you think that just because you're a bullfighter, you don't deserve the same respect we do? You are the one saving our asses, and from the sounds of it, most of these guys don't care."
"But some do," I reminded her. "And those are the same ones who can make or break us."
"So we fight together," she said.
Tanner just shook his head. "Cody, I'm not going to let you throw away your life-long dream for me. Nor for him! This is the one thing that should have nothing to do with us. It's your dream, and our job is to get the fuck out of your way."
"And this is yours too!" she shot back. "Besides, why do you two get to stand up for me and it doesn't work the other way around?"
"Because we men think we're big and tough when we're protecting our girl?" I offered.
Tanner chuckled once. "Because we know you're right?"
Cody paused to glance back at the trees standing like shadows under the moonlight. I watched as she licked her lips, then pulled in a deep breath. When she looked back, her chin was just a bit higher.
"And I can't fight to protect the ones I love too?" There was the smallest quaver in her voice, like she might be a bit nervous.
But that word? The way she'd thrown it out there like a dare? Oh, this was definitely my dream girl, yet I couldn't react. Not yet. No, this was really for Tanner, and I knew exactly how much it meant to him.
Pushing himself away from the edge of the door, he stepped closer, not caring that his towel was hanging dangerously low on his hips. Nope, Tanner just closed the distance between them until he could cup Cody's face in both of his hands and bent closer.
But he stopped before his mouth met hers. "I love you too, Cody Lane. And him. I just don't want either of you to suffer for me."
"I'm not," she insisted. "I just changed my mind about what's most important.
I mean, is the Pbr really a dream if this is how it's run?
Or maybe I should start fighting to fix it so I can maybe have it all?
Y'all, I was always told I can only love one thing.
.." And she paused to look between us. "But clearly that's not true, because I really do love you both. "
The air slid from Tanner's lungs, and he kissed her so damned hard. She melted into him, but one arm reached out for me. I caught her hand, letting her pull me closer, but it wasn't her neck I kissed. No, it was Tanner's my mouth taunted.
"I love you both," I said between kisses. "And don't either of you ever make me pick."
"No," Tanner said as he pulled his mouth from hers and turned to face me. "Haven't you figured it out yet, J.D.? This is why we work. I'm sugar, you're spice, and she's everything nice."
But over his shoulder, Cody caught my eye. Grabbing the back of his hair, she pulled just enough to bare Tanner's throat for me even as she pressed in against his back, kissing his bare shoulder.
"Yeah," I agreed. "Because that? That's real fucking nice."