Chapter 1 Sydney - Revelation
Chapter 1
Sydney - Revelation
T he lightbulb came on in my head. “Shit! Mother trucker! Damn! Damn! Damn!” I checked my mirror and plowed across three lanes of interstate to make it to the Scenic Overlook ramp. My truck pushed up the incline at a high rate of speed. I scanned the parking lot and found a spot in the back. Jamming it into neutral and pulling the emergency brake, I continued my stream of expletives. “Cheese and rice! Crap on a cracker! Son of a biscuit! Fuck! Fuck!”
Samson regarded my antics from the passenger seat with one eye open and the other waiting for him to go back to his nap. The answer I knew I didn’t want was hidden in my phone. I opened the calendar and scanned through the past six weeks, eight weeks. There it was. The date I was dreading. Amid the chaos and excitement for the Oscars, I had missed my notification to change my birth control ring.
I looked at Samson. “I think I am in deep dog do-do, no offense.” He gazed his cocoa eyes at me and then closed them again. “Yeah, no worries. I’ll figure it out. You go back to sleep, buddy. So glad we had this chat.”
It could just be stress. You’ve been under so much pressure from Austin being in rehab and getting ready for the Oscars.
But in my gut, I knew I was fooling myself. I knew I was pregnant. I didn’t even want to say the word out loud. As if not saying that word would magically erase the predicament I found myself in right now.
Samson perked his snout up as I opened the door. “Let’s take a walk.” I clipped his leash on and we strolled up the path to the overlook. The lush mountains in the distance looked like they were covered with broccoli florets. Down in the valley, I could see miniature boats out on the river. The sun warmed my freckles as I stood there, breathing deeply, and trying to get my brain to stop short circuiting.
Taking the long way back around the edge of the parking lot, I noticed some tiny buttercup flowers sprouting up through the concrete. Samson took a quick stroll around the pet area and watered a few trees. Before I put the truck in gear, I texted Abby.
Me: Can you call me after work? No hurry.
I needed a little time to figure out how I was going to tell her about my stupidity. It still barely registered in my brain. My original plan for tonight was to camp out under the stars, but now I think a hot shower and watching some guilty pleasure TV from a hotel bed sounded even better. I could order Chinese and pick up some MnMs at the gas station.
Two more hours tearing up the asphalt, and I was ready to call it quits for the evening. Once ensconced in our hotel room, I kicked off my sandals, and tossed my suitcase onto the bed. Samson had his own tote bag with his necessities, but for some reason, I always ended up carrying it. I poured tap water into his bowl and scooped out a can of wet food for him to devour. He takes treats gently from my hand, but he’s a ferocious hurricane in front of his food bowl.
I propped up some pillows against the headboard and sat down on the bed with the remote in my hand. Trying to find something to watch on TV could be an effort in futility. I finally settled on watching Pretty Woman for the umpteenth time while I waited for my Chinese feast to arrive. My last stop before the hotel had been at CVS to replenish my stash of MnMs, get a strawberry milk, Pepsi, and a pregnancy test. The test was sitting in the bathroom, but I wasn’t quite ready for that yet .
My dinner smelled fantastic and tasted scrumptious. I’ve had lots of mediocre meals on the road, but Chinese never disappoints. How could a billion Chinese people be wrong? 6 They’re not.
While cleaning up my duck sauce packets and fortune cookie wrappers, I ran the hot water in the shower. I pushed my dirty clothes into a corner and stepped into the steam. Camping does not afford the opportunity to get a hot shower every day, and I savored every single second of naked warmth. After scrubbing and shampooing, I pulled up the plug and let the water fill the tub. I sank into the wet blanket and closed my eyes. As a plus size woman, tubs are not usually accommodating the way they were when I was a kid.
I reheated the water twice before emerging from my liquid cocoon. All four towels lay scattered about the floor as I brushed out my wet curls. I smoothed some conditioner into them, hoping to keep the frizz to a minimum. My silky nightgown felt smooth against my skin, compared to sleeping in my clothes like I did while camping.
As I approached the bed to snuggle under the covers, my phone rang. Abby. The moment of truth. I took a deep breath and answered.
“Hi Sissy! What’s going on?” Abby chirped.
“Just living my glamorous life on the road.”
She laughed. “You signed up for this. No one said you had to do this forever, silly goose.”
“I know. I am enjoying it. But I stopped at a hotel tonight and had the best hot shower ever. I almost didn’t get out of the tub.”
“Tell me what you’ve been up to today.”
I thought for a moment. “Mostly I drove today. Yesterday, I tooled around Hungry Horse Dam, and now I’m heading to the Badlands.
She sighed wistfully. “I sure do wish I could be there with you. I bet you are seeing some amazing things.”
“I am. I can’t stop taking pictures, although none of them compared to seeing these places with my own eyes. My dreams have been so vivid when I’m sleeping in the fresh air.” I paused, trying to find my courage. “There might be another reason, though.”
“What other reason? Did you take one of those rocks you’re not supposed to take from the desert? You know that’s asking for bad ju-ju.”
“No, not exactly. I think I’m pregnant.”
Radio silence came from the other end of the line. I waited a beat. “Abby, are you there?”
She rallied. “Yes, Sissy. I’m still here. I don’t know what to say. I’m speechless, and you know that isn’t an easy task. Are you sure about this? Did you take a pregnancy test?”
“I’m fairly certain. In all the excitement over the Oscars, I neglected to swap my birth control ring for a fresh one. That was two weeks before the Oscars, so that was over eight weeks ago. I bought a test at CVS today but I’m afraid to take it.”
“Oh goodness! I would be afraid, too. I’m so sorry you’re all alone right now. Why don’t you take the test now? I will stay on the phone with you.”
She was right, of course. I would feel at least a little better knowing that she was on the phone with me. “Okay. Thanks, Abby.” I went into the bathroom and read the instructions. “I’m going to put the phone on the counter and put you on speaker. I need both hands.” I completed the steps and laid the stick face down on the counter. “Can you time me for ten minutes? Then we will know.”
Abby jabbered on about her work and a new boyfriend she was dating, but I didn’t hear any of it. All I could hear was my heart pounding loudly in my ears. My mind kept replaying that day on my calendar, trying to figure out how I could have managed to forget something so important. That’s when I remembered.
Jason. That was the day he attacked me in the sound booth. Tori, Venus, and Daisy had rallied around me to take my mind off of that terrible event. My phone alert went off somewhere in the middle of all that commotion and I missed my notification. I didn’t tell Marcus about Jason because I didn’t want him to take matters into his own hands. Austin couldn’t do anything drastic from rehab, which worked in my favor.
“Sissy? Sissy!” Abby shouted. “Time’s up. Are you ready? I’m right here for you.”
Taking the test wand from the counter, I flipped it over to reveal my fate. “Oh shit. Can’t wait to hear what Mom will say about this.”
“Oh, Sydney. I wish I could hug you right now. I love you and will support you no matter what. ”
I just stared at the word Pregnant in the test window. Relief washed over me to know that my suspicions were correct. But now I had new problems on my hands.
“Is it Marcus?” Abby interrupted my thoughts.
“What? What do you mean?”
“Is Marcus the father? I don’t mean to pry, but you two are dating? Were dating? I mean it honestly doesn’t matter to me. God Abby, shut your mouth.” She reprimanded herself.
“It’s not like that. I don’t know who the father is. I feel like I’m in a warped version of Mamma Mia.”
“I don’t follow.”
“I had what I thought was protected sex with Marcus on Oscar night. Then, three days later, I had sex with Austin. Still not aware of my birth control snafu. This was not part of my plan. Now what do I do?” Then I burst into tears. It was too much for one pregnant woman to take. I numbly shuffled out of the bathroom, crawled under the sheets, and cried myself to sleep.
6 The Lost Boys. Dir. Joel Schumacher. Warner Bros. Studio, 1987. Film