Chapter 14
Chapter Fourteen
Julie
T ingles race up my leg from the spot where Asher’s hand rests. His touch makes me antsy and also calms my anxiety in a way I’m not quite sure I’m ready to explore. I can’t decide whether I want to shove his hand away or press it deeper into my leg and beg him to never stop touching me. That thought scares me shitless enough that I pick up his hand, placing it onto the wheel.
“Two hands on the wheel,” I mumble. I couldn’t give a fuck whether he has two hands on the wheel, but if he has two hands on the wheel, that’s one less hand that’s touching me in a way that makes my insides go haywire.
He looks at me with a smirk on his face, as if he can read my chaotic thoughts. I’m starting to think it’s possible he actually can.
“There are snacks in the back for when you get hungry.”
When he said he was taking care of everything for this trip, evidently he meant more than just hotels and activities along the way. He texted me yesterday that he was buying road trip snacks, and when I asked if he needed a list, he told me he already knew what I wanted. Unused to someone else taking the reins like this, I spent more time than I’ll admit feeling anxious about his snack choices. Snack choices, for the love of god.
I need to get a grip.
I have no idea how to get a grip.
Wanting to see what he brought, and a little desperate for something to do with my hands, I turn to grab the bag. But what I see when I peer into the back seat is actually three reusable shopping bags and a cooler.
Turning back to him, I say, “So when you said you were getting snacks, you weren’t kidding around.”
He just winks at me. “I wanted to make sure you had everything you liked.”
I narrow my eyes at him. “How do you know what I like if you didn’t ask me?”
He just shrugs and smiles. “Psychic.”
His face is his usual mix of calm and happy, but I didn’t miss the wince that crossed his face when he shrugged just now, or the way he rolls his right shoulder like the muscles are tight. He also looked like he was in pain when he was putting my suitcases in the car, and I wonder what that’s all about.
“Is your shoulder okay? It seems like it’s bothering you.”
His smile vanishes. “It’s fine, just a little tight. Bruised it in the last game.”
He says all that a little too fast, and it’s been long enough since the game that a bruised shoulder shouldn’t still be bothering him. I’m immediately curious, but I don’t press him because if anyone knows a thing or two about hiding vulnerability, it’s me. You could probably hack my arm off, and I would just go about my day, insisting I was fine. It tracks that a professional athlete would have similar instincts.
I want his smile back, though .
Asher should always be smiling.
I reach into the back and pull out one of the grocery bags. I set it on my lap and when I open it, my jaw drops. Inside are peppermint Hershey Kisses. But not just one bag; there must be at least twenty in there. I look at him in disbelief.
“It’s the end of January.”
He gestures toward the dashboard. “I know the date, Juliette. It’s right there on the screen.”
I let that snark and the use of my full name sail by because I have more important things to focus on. “Stores stop selling peppermint Hershey Kisses before New Years. I have never, in my entire life, seen a bag of this candy in a store in January. I look every time I go. How did you get these?”
He grins. “One of my teammates knows a guy who works for Hershey. He hooked me up.”
“And how did you even know I liked these?”
His grin widens. “I called Hallie. She told me you’re, and I quote, fucking obsessed with them . I told you I wanted to take care of everything. That included getting you everything you might need or want without having to ask. Asking you what you want gives you more work because then you have to make me a list. I figured out another way.”
Well, shit . I stare at him, my brain unable to form words, entirely unused to anyone attempting to take some of the mental load off my plate. I bear my mental load, and everyone else’s too. I like it that way. I always have. Doing all the things helps me feel in control, and I need to be in control. Always. Except I can’t deny how good it feels to have just shown up with a packed suitcase and nothing else, even if what’s in my suitcase might be all wrong because he wouldn’t tell me what we were doing along the way.
“You okay there, Juliette? You went quiet.”
I clear my throat and shake off my thoughts. “ That’s still not my name. But I’m good. Thanks for these. Hallie ate my last bag last night, so I thought I was out of luck until December.”
“Anything for you. Check out the rest of the bags.”
The second bag I open is filled with gummy candy. Gummy worms, sour gummy worms, gummy bears, gummy peaches, and that’s just what I can see on top. Asher glances over.
“That’s my bag.”
“Just yours?”
“I mean, I’ll share if you ask nicely, but I really like gummy candy.”
“Between this and your soda all your teeth are going to fall out.”
I gesture to his Big Gulp of Dr. Pepper in the cupholder next to my latte. Apparently, the man doesn’t drink coffee. Instead, he starts every day with a fountain soda the size of his head.
“Haven’t yet.” He winks at me and turns back to the road.
“So do you go out and get a fountain soda every morning?”
He grins at me as if he is just tickled pink at me asking him a personal question.
“Nope. I have a soda fountain in my house.”
“You…seriously? With Dr. Pepper in it?”
“Yep. There’s room for a second soda, so if you tell me what your favorite is, I’ll add it in.”
“What makes you think I’ll be at your house?”
“Luck and unwavering persistence, Juliette.”
The same words he said to me in the friends and family room after the game.
“You really think you’re that lucky?”
“You’re sitting in my car right now, aren’t you? So that makes me the luckiest fucking guy on the planet. So, what’s your favorite soda?”
“Diet Pepsi,” I mumble.
“See now, I’m a Coke man myself, when I’m not drinking Dr. Pepper. But since it’s you, I’ll allow it. Consider it done. Check the rest of the bags.”
I do and discover a veritable cornucopia of my favorite snack foods, including my top three, salt and vinegar potato chips, Peanut Butter Oreos, and caramel corn. Lifting the lid on the cooler, I spot lime seltzer in my favorite brand, a couple bottles of water, and assorted other drinks.
“Hallie really did give you the full list, huh?”
Instead of responding, Asher gently guides the car over to the shoulder, and stops right there on the side of I-70. Putting the car in park, he takes off his sunglasses, tosses them on the dash, and turns to me. Expression serious, he picks up one of my hands and holds it in both of his, locking eyes with me.
“Hallie gave me the list because I asked her to, and she loves you. I wanted you to be comfortable with me, and I wanted you to have everything you might want or need without you having to ask. I know you think you don’t know me very well, but all you need to know right now is that I take care of my people. And Juliette, I think you are going to be my most important person.”
He draws my hand to his lips and brushes a kiss over my knuckles, sky blue eyes holding mine. My stomach erupts in butterflies and my heart takes off at a gallop. Startled, I yank my hand away from him, my right hand coming down to scratch at my wrist. Asher just reaches over and lays one of his enormous quarterback hands over both of mine, halting my anxious scratching.
His eyes bore into mine, and for a minute, and I get lost in the deep pools of blue. I have the crazy thought that I could drown in him, give myself over to his comfort and steadiness and never worry about another thing as long as I live. My brain rejects that thought as quickly as it comes. I give myself over to no one.
“You’re safe with me, Juliette,” he says, his voice low and sure.
Then he puts the car in drive, slides his sunglasses back on, and pulls back onto the highway, leaving me sitting in the passenger seat gaping at him, sure that I have never felt quite so unsafe in all my life.