Chapter 31 Fox
THIRTY-ONE
FOX
Icouldn’t see.
I couldn’t feel anything but pain and fear.
I could barely breathe.
Every muscle in my body screamed for mercy. It had been days since Dante and Asylum’s assault.
I wasn’t dumb.
I knew I was dying.
Dante and Asylum saw to it. Why they let it drag out was beyond me, but they were both insane. It was the only conclusion I could come to.
My head spun as I lay on my dirty mattress. Blood loss. Sickness. Pain. I could no longer walk. I couldn’t see. My feet were fucked. My whole body was fucked, quite literally.
I dry heaved off the edge of my mattress as the ugly images and feelings replayed in my mind.
Fucked. Fucked. FUCKED.
I gagged again.
I didn’t feel like a man anymore. It felt like everything that made me a man had been torn away from me down here.
And I knew E was worse.
“Mama,” I rasped. “Mom?”
I sobbed softly, reaching out weakly into the darkness.
When I was a kid, I always called for my mom to help me.
She always came. She always answered. The last time I’d called to her, Rosalie had been dying on a highway in my arms. She’d answered then and helped me save her.
I needed her now. “Please, Mom. P-Please. I’m scared.
Please help me…Come get me… I-I can’t. I can’t, Mama. Please…”
I lay in the silence, my soft sobs around me, my head spinning worse.
So this was what dying was like.
It really hurt.
My breath came out in shuddering gasps as I replayed the last visit from Dante and Asylum in my head. I’d been doing it since I was dragged back to my room.
It felt like I was supposed to know something.
I racked my brain, my head so heavy and cloudy.
Nothing. Nothing. Fucking nothing….
And then it hit me.
I want to remind you that you have the tools for survival.
I fumbled to reach into the pocket of my pants. They’d at least had the decency to put them back on me. I’d especially picked these pants because of the tiny hidden zipper pocket in them.
“Come on,” I snarled weakly, really fucking praying they hadn’t taken it from me.
And then my fingers brushed against the cold metal of the coin Matteo had given me.
I didn’t fucking care how Asylum knew it was there. That guy heard voices. He was nuts. But… he knew, and he’d reminded me. Maybe he and Dante couldn’t directly save me, but I’d give them the benefit of the doubt on this one.
They knew I had it, and they knew it would break this fucking place open.
With shaky fingers, I turned it over and over, my heart pounding unevenly in my chest.
I envisioned my sweet Rosie in my mind. Her smile. Her pretty eyes. Her voice. Her laughter. The way her kisses felt on my lips. How my heart felt so full whenever she was near me.
I repeated the memories over in my head, crying softly.
I’m going to marry you someday….
Not if I marry you first, Foxy!
Red pigtails. So many curls. Laughter. Our treehouse. Her songs.
Our first kiss all those years ago.
Our second kiss when I finally won her back.
Bubble baths.
Pizza and movie nights.
Making love to her.
Watching her eyes light up as I handed her my notebook to read.
I love you, Rosie.
I love you so fucking much, baby.
“I’m dying anyway,” I whispered aloud, my voice trembling.
“I-I’m sorry I couldn’t give you a better world.
I’ll find you in our next life. I swear it to you.
Rosie… Rosie!” I wept, crying out her name.
“Rosie! Meet me on the mountaintop. Please! PLEASE! My Rosie… My Rosie… I’m sorry, baby. I’m s-sorry…”
And I pushed the button. The coin buzzed in my hand, sending soft vibrations through my arm as I tightened my fist around it.
Fuck this place, and fuck Everett Church.
Hell was coming for him, and it wore a fucking De Santis nametag.