Chapter 21
Elizabeth
We arrive at Miguel’s place in the early evening and I’m excited to see Donovan, I can’t wait to hear more about his time at college; and more importantly, about the hot guy he’s been hooking up with.
He’s been evasive in messages, so I’m hoping he just wants to tell me face-to-face.
I’m also ready to tell him about Angel; after the last couple of days, I can’t imagine hiding our relationship any longer.
Now that we’ve said we love each other, I don’t want it to be a secret anymore.
It’s Sofía who answers the door, clearly expecting us.
“Hola, mija,” she says, pulling me into a hug and kissing me on the cheek.
“Hola, Sofía.”
I lean into the hug; there’s something about her energy that makes me feel comfortable, I hope Donovan and Angel know how lucky they are to have her.
“ángel,” she says, her eyes welling up as she looks at him, before pulling him into a hug that seems to last forever.
Once in the kitchen, I notice the table is laid for dinner but there are only four settings .
“Where’s Donovan?” I ask, accepting a beer from Miguel.
“He’s arriving tomorrow,” Sofía says, “he said something about needing to attend a football game this evening.”
“Wow,” I say, “he must really be getting into the college spirit, he hates football.”
“That’s what I thought too,” Sofía chuckles, “but I think his roommate is on the team and they’ve grown close, so he wants to support his friend.”
“Ah, I see.”
I wonder if the hot guy he’s seeing is actually the roommate, when I last saw him he did mention more than once how attractive he was. If it is, I need to change the subject…
“Can I help you with dinner, Sofía?” I ask, looking to the kitchen.
“No need, we’re getting takeout this evening; I hope you like Chinese food?”
“Absolutely,” I say, trying not to smile too much at the fact that Chinese takeout is a favorite of ours, and that Angel and I have spent many an evening in bed together with a couple of cartons of noodles or rice.
“Great, I’ll phone in the order,” Miguel says, taking out his cell. “What would you both like?”
Before I have a chance to say anything, Angel leans on the counter and lists off our usual order to Miguel.
“Please can we get a Beef Ho-fun, a Vegetable Chow Mein, but with no mushrooms, and some Spring Rolls?”
“Sure,” Miguel says, “and that’s for both of you?”
They glance between us, a knowing look on Sofía’s face.
“Yes please,” I say, “we order Chinese takeout at the club sometimes, and that’s usually what we share… I mean all of us… everyone shares it… ”
I know, I’m a terrible liar, and it one hundred percent sounds like I’m making this up.
“Great,” Miguel says, and I can feel Angel smirking at me.
It doesn’t take long for the food to arrive, and as Sofía and Miguel are also sharing, we put the cartons on each side of the table, family style.
Everything smells delicious, but I don’t manage to hide my disappointment when I see the mushrooms in the Chow Mein.
It’s not an allergy or anything, I just hate the texture.
I go to pick them out, but Angel beats me to it.
“I’ve got you,” he says, picking out the pieces with his chopsticks.
“Thanks,” I say, sharing the spring rolls between our plates.
Sofía smiles at me and I worry how obvious we are, but the look on her face tells me that even if she does know, she’s absolutely okay with it.
I’m in the same guest room as last time, and as Sofía and Miguel go to bed so early and aren’t likely to disturb us, Angel soon joins me there. Considering that we’ve spent the best part of the last twenty-four hours having sex, we both just settle in to snuggle and sleep.
“Your mom knows about us,” I whisper, my head resting against his chest.
He chuckles. “I know, I didn’t say anything, but it’s so much harder to hide it now; so many parts of our lives are connected, it would have felt weird ordering a separate takeout tonight.”
“Yeah, I can’t wait to tell Donovan about us tomorrow, and then we don’t have to hide anymore.”
He kisses the top of my head and holds me closer for a moment.
“I’m ready if you are.”
It’s about mid-morning when Donovan arrives and we’re all out by the pool as we hear him shout from inside.
“Mamá? Miguel? I’m here!”
“We’re outside, mijo!” Sofía calls, as she gets up from her lounger to greet him.
When Donovan steps out, I expect to see a look of joy on his face, he’s usually so happy to see me; but instead, as he catches sight of Angel and I, his face drops, a look of panic and worry crossing it, before a fake smile takes its place.
“Hey, little bro,” Angel says, pulling him into a hug.
“Hey,” Donovan replies, the enthusiasm obviously fake. “Happy Birthday. I uh… I wasn’t expecting to see you here.”
“It’s called a surprise,” Angel says, lightly punching him on the shoulder.
“Hey you,” I say, but as I pull him into a hug I whisper, “I’m sorry, have we fucked up?”
“Kind of,” he whispers, “I’m going to need your help.”
“Anything,” I say, letting him go. “You look great, Winbrook clearly agrees with you.”
“Thanks,” he says, keeping his arm around me as though he needs the support.
We take our spots on the loungers again and spend the rest of the morning catching up; Donovan tells us about college, spending a lot of time reassuring Sofía that he’s looking after himself. But I can tell something’s agitating him, he seems nervous.
I offer to go and get everyone a refill on their drinks, and he jumps up to say he’ll help, following me inside and closing the door behind him .
“What is going on?” I whisper.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were both going to be here?”
“I literally found out yesterday and was told it was meant to be a surprise. I thought you’d be happy to see your brother—well, and me. Also, why the football game? Is this to do with your hot roommate?”
“Shh,” he says, “I’ll catch you up on the gossip another time, today, you need to help me.”
“I already said I’d do anything, what’s going on?”
“I’m going to come out to my mom and Miguel tonight,” he says in a whispered rush, as though if he didn’t say it fast, he wouldn’t say it at all.
“Oh my god, Donovan, that’s amazing,” I say, pulling him into a hug, then realizing the issue. “Ohhh, and now we’re here.”
“Exactly,” he says.
“I mean, of course I’ll be there with you if you need me, you can tell all three of them together; I’ll hold your hand the entire time.”
“No fucking way,” he says, the anxiety pouring off of him in waves. “I can’t tell them all together, it’s too much.”
“Okay, okay,” I say, gently holding his shoulders. “It’s however you want to do it, whatever you need.”
“Thanks,” he says, taking some deep breaths. “I need you to tell Diablo for me.”
It takes me a moment to process what he’s asking…
“Wait, what?”
“I need you to tell him for me.”
I sigh. “Donovan, I can’t even imagine how scary this must be, but I genuinely don’t think he’ll react how you think he will, he loves you so much.”
“Then it doesn’t matter if you do it for me,” he gives me his puppy dog eyes, knowing I can’t resist them .
“I don’t know, coming out, it’s a big thing, I don’t want to take that away from you.”
“I get what you’re saying, but please, stop trying to be a good ally.
I’ve got a big enough task telling my religious Mom and her conservative husband; that’s enough coming out barriers without also needing to tell my potentially homophobic, motorcycle club member, brother.
” He pauses giving me a knowing look. “Besides, I think he’ll take it better coming from you. ”
“Uh… what makes you think hearing it from me will be any better?”
He rolls his eyes. “Come on, Beth, everyone knows.”
“Everyone knows what?” I ask, panic starting to rise in my chest.
“About you and Diablo.”
“I… uh… I don’t know what you mean,” I try to play ignorant but stumble over my words… does everyone really know?
“Beth,” he says gently, “it’s okay, I understand why you didn’t tell me, and I’m not mad. Look, everyone knows you’ve been seeing each other, pretty much since my leaving party, we’ve all been talking about it, and you know, helping you both along when needed.”
“What the fuck?” My voice rises in shock.
“Shh,” he says, “yes, everyone knows. And you and I, we will be talking about it, I want all the details, well, not all the details, not the ones that are going to make me feel sick about my brother…” He shudders and shakes it off.
“But this weekend,” he brings his hands to his chest. “This is about me. I want to come out to my mom and Miguel, so I need you to tell your boyfriend… lover… fuck buddy… whatever the hell he is to you, that I’m gay. ”
Diablo
Elizabeth’s been in a weird mood ever since Donovan arrived, I’m guessing she’s nervous about telling him about us.
Part of me worries that she doesn’t want to tell him at all, that maybe, now it’s come down to it, she’s having doubts.
When we’re alone and it’s just us, I know she wants this, but what if the thought of telling someone is making her question us being together.
I can’t imagine my life without her now, she’s changed me.
Even just a few weeks ago, I’d have been a miserable asshole with these thoughts in my head, probably doing something to try and sabotage us myself, but now, I just want to talk to her.
Shit, if she wants to keep us a secret forever I would, if it meant we could be together.
The guys would laugh their asses off at how whipped I am.
I’ve been trying to get her alone for hours, but she keeps dodging me, until now. She’s scrolling on her phone in the kitchen, a worried look on her face.
“Hey,” I say, getting as close to her as I can without it looking too suspicious, should anyone walk in.
“Hey,” she smiles, and I feel a sense of relief.
“You okay?”
“Yeah, I was just looking up some places to eat in town.”
She shows me her phone screen; photos of food and star ratings fill the screen.