Chapter 20
The crowd was thickening. There was hardly any space to breathe as they all tried to go through the same doors, up the same stairs, all scattered out in close clusters, trying to find a spot. It was impossible to take more than a step without someone in front or behind moving close as well. As they tried to navigate their way, Bette was also looking for her mom. She should have asked where she was seated, but in the moment, it hadn't crossed her mind.
Bette and Kerrie wedged themselves against a railing. Bette searched the crowds while Kerrie provided a protective barrier to the crowds by leaning against the back of Bette. The atmosphere was borderline frantic. Like an enormous game of musical chairs, everyone seemed worried they'd be the one without a seat. Thankfully, after a few minutes of searching, Bette saw her mother on the opposite side they were on, waving her arms.
"She's right there. Looks about seven rows up," half-shouted Bette.
Kerrie nodded, taking Bette's hand and leading her through the throng of people like a large shield. Bette clutched her purse in front of her with her free hand, not trusting how easy it could be to dip a hand in someone's bag. Once at the steps, Kerrie stood to the side and motioned for Bette to go first.
The row Clara was in was all filled up except for two spots beside her. They apologized as they shuffled by a few people seated next to them. Once they arrived at their seats, Bette cringed as Clara stared over her shoulder at Kerrie, her mouth slightly open. Please don't be an ass, Mother. Please don't be an ass .
"Hello, I'm Kerrie Matthews," greeted Kerrie, the smile on her face schooled perfectly, not giving the slightest hint that she was being gawked at like she was an attraction in a circus. She held out her hand.
"My goodness, you're huge."
"Mother!" yelled Bette, causing heads to turn their way.
Without skipping a beat, Kerrie replied back, "Yes, ma'am. That was the way my momma made me. Go big or go home."
To Bette's surprise, her mother appeared to be at a loss for words at Kerrie's quick retort. The older woman simply placed her thin, aging hand in Kerrie's and said, "I'm Clara. Clara Cooper."
"It's nice to meet you, Mrs. Cooper. I can see where Bette gets her beauty from."
"Oh, well, thank you," said Clara, a slight blush tinging her cheeks.
As they took their seats, Bette leaned in close, touching Kerrie's arm to get her attention. She made sure to keep her voice low enough that her mother couldn't hear her. "Did you seriously just flabbergast the dragon lady?"
Kerrie winked at her. "Not my first dragon lady. The key is to disarm them up front. It probably won't last, but it'll get us through the graduation."
The pomp and circumstance of graduations always fascinated Bette. Everybody puts effort into their appearance to present the best versions of themselves. Squeezed into an auditorium or gymnasium so tightly that they could hear the person beside them breathing. All so they could see their child walk across a stage. There would be mothers crying. Fathers would be smiling with pride, and on the outside, everything would look perfect. It felt like an accomplishment to be a part of the moment.
But if one were to take a really close look, they would see the cracks in the facade. Babies crying and old men nodding off. Family members turned away from each other because they didn't want to see them to begin with, but the graduation forced them to be in the same room. Mothers irritated with fathers because they had to carry all the stuff that they needed to the tiny little seats that made anyone over 140 lbs uncomfortable. People would be sweating but trying not to look like they were. Everyone waiting for their person to be called and then impatiently waiting to get out of there afterwards because they didn't care about the other 100 kids after theirs. Families of students whose last names started with S or W had to suffer until the end, and there was always somebody getting up and leaving just because their person had been called already to walk across the stage. The irritation that would creep up on the people still waiting because it felt disrespectful .
It felt like an eternity before they started calling names. The speeches before were moving in a cliched way. Nothing that really stood out. Nothing that these kids would carry on with them into their new journey. Since Zoe's last name was Cooper, they didn't have to wait too long for her name to be called. When Zoe did finally stand and walk towards the stage, Bette started doing the one thing she had promised herself she wouldn't; she started tearing up.
Her baby was no longer a baby. She was an adult, and now she would be going out into the adult world using her shiny new degree. Shelly had been pissed when she decided to go into the business management field. Zoe wanted to run her own real estate company eventually. Where that had come from, neither Bette nor Shelly knew. Of course, Bette was more supportive than Shelly was. Shelly had wanted Zoe to become a lawyer like herself. But Zoe was having none of that. Bette grinned at the memory of the night Zoe had told her mother that she was not going to be a damned lawyer. It had been explosive, and Bette had to stand between Zoe and Shelly at one point. She had never seen her wife so angry, but Zoe was stepping out of line, and Shelly didn't like when someone didn't conform. Try as she might, Zoe could not be tamed, and Bette fought for her to be able to be herself.
When it was finally time for her daughter to walk across the stage, Bette no longer had control over her tears. They rolled down her face like a rainstorm against a car windshield. There was no stopping them, and she didn't try to. All she wanted was the world for Zoe, and this would be a step in the right direction.
Zoe practically bounced up to the stage in her black graduation gown and tasseled hat. Even from a distance, she could tell that Zoe was grinning from ear to ear. Bette held up her phone, taking pictures, trying to be in the moment but also capture it.
"Here, let me. You enjoy the moment," Kerrie said quickly, taking the phone from her and snapping pictures.
Bette didn't respond. She stayed in the moment, watching Zoe shake the hand of the various staff members, and when she got to the platform's edge and started walking down the ramp, she looked up at where Bette was sitting and held up her diploma, doing a little jig. Bette laughed and cheered for her, electricity shooting through her body from excitement. It was such a beautiful moment.
"She looks so happy," beamed Clara, for once sounding proud and not cynical.
"She does. She's done so well," sobbed Bette, digging in her bag for a pack of tissues. She pulled a few out and handed them to Clara's waiting hand before getting her own. At some point, Kerrie's comforting arm had wrapped around her shoulder, and despite the heat in the crowded auditorium, she leaned in, trying to wipe her tears and snotty nose as ladylike as possible.
The rest of the graduation went on without a hitch. Bette fixed her makeup from crying, and her mother had turned back into her stoic self. Towards the end, they were all ready to leave.
"They couldn't make these seats a bit bigger? It's pinching the hell out of my hips," complained Bette in a low voice. She shifted in her seat, not finding a comfortable position.
Kerrie nodded in agreement. Stadium seats seemed to get smaller and smaller. She was uncomfortable, and she could only imagine how Kerrie felt being larger. "Yeah, I don't think they understand that real people sit in these things. Hopefully it won't be much longer. We're at the W's." She glanced at the graduation program in her hands and noted that there really weren't very many more students to go, and then they could get out of there. She had no idea where Shelly and the toddler were. She knew they were in there somewhere because she had seen Zoe waving across the other side of the auditorium. She was not looking forward to the lunch.
Thankfully, soon, they were able to wind down the end of the graduation, and all the students stood, changing their cap tassels from one side to the other and then throwing them up in the air. Everyone cheered; a feeling of joy pulsed through the crowd.
That didn't last very long, though, as it quickly turned into a rat race to see who could get out of there the quickest and find their graduate. Bette had the foresight to tell Zoe to meet her outside and to the left of the building. She assumed that Shelly would be heading in that direction as well, and she steeled herself for it.
Kerrie led them out of the aisle of seats and into the crowded steps. She motioned for Bette and Clara to go before her, holding up the crowd behind her. They slipped out quickly and stayed close together. The crowd was suffocating; everyone jumbled together. People touching shoulder to shoulder. A man bumped into her and appeared not to realize that he was pushing her over, so she stopped moving to let him go first. Then, a woman shoved past her, dragging along three younger kids. The move almost caused Bette to fall, but a strong arm grabbed her and steadied her. She looked over her shoulder to see Kerrie with a look of concern in her eyes, but she smiled and nodded. Clara was sandwiched between them and looked confused .
It took nearly 10 minutes to get outside. Once it had opened up, Bette let out a breath. The crowd had been suffocating.
Her mother was having difficulty keeping up, so she grabbed onto her arm and pulled her close, with Kerrie following right behind them.
She was able to navigate them over to a large tree where Bette and Zoe agreed to meet.
"My goodness, there are so many people here," complained Clara, looking uncomfortable.
Kerrie nodded, casting a glance out over the sea of people. "I always hate that part of things like this. There's so many people, and everybody wants to do the same thing at the same time."
"I thought that lady was going to take me down for a second," said Bette.
"She did almost mow you down," noted Kerrie.
"Now we're waiting on Zoe, correct?" Clara asked.
"Yes, I told her to meet us here. Are you going to Shelly's for lunch?"
Shaking her head, Clara answered. "No, I don't believe I will. I'll just give Zoe her graduation gift now and go home. I had my fill of Shelly when you were married. I don't feel like spending the next few hours with her."
Bette could see Kerrie repress a smile. She nodded to her mother. "I know how you feel. I've had my fill of her, too, but unfortunately she is the mother of my child, and this is about Zoe, so I'll be sucking it up and going."
"Are you going?" Clara asked, turning to Kerrie.
"Yes, ma'am, I am."
"Have you met Shelly?"
"I have. The day Bette was moving in."
Frowning, Clara's back straightened. She looked between the two. "Are you two living together?"
Bette shook her head, stopping the trail of questions now before it got out of hand. "No, Mother. I live alone in my apartment." Clara didn't need to know that Kerrie was only a floor away and her landlord.
"Mom!"
Bette looked up, searching for where her daughter's voice had come from.
"Zoe! Over here, Zoe," called out Kerrie, her long arm going up. No doubt she was easily spotted .
Bette's chest exploded with jubilation when she saw her daughter beaming from ear to ear with her cap and diploma in her hand. The jubilation lasted about two seconds because right behind Zoe were Shelly and the toddler.
Zoe rushed over and hugged Bette, who allowed herself to soak up the embrace. Her little girl was not so little anymore, but when she looked into Zoe's face as she pulled back, all she saw was a toothy little 2-year-old grinning back at her with tiny blonde pigtails and little overalls. She felt tears beginning to spring up. She swallowed thickly to push them back down. She had already become an emotional wreck once, and she didn't want to do it again, especially with Shelly there. It would only make her look weak. And someone should never look weak in front of a predator.
Shelly and Jen were styled to the nines as always. Both were dressed femininely. Bette was glad that she didn't wear the jumpsuit because Shelly was wearing something similar. Hanging on her arm was Jen, looking every bit of her 23 years. How in the world could Shelly have that child on her arm and not feel ridiculous? The age difference was clear as day despite the fact that Shelly worked very hard to keep her youthful looks up, fighting the aging process with everything in her. Try as she might, she still looked like Jen's mother, not her lover.
"Ah, there you are. We tried looking for you but didn't see you," said Shelly. She shifted her gaze over the three of them as if deciding who to approach first. "Mother Cooper, it's nice to see you again."
"Hello, Shelly. Lovely day for graduation, don't you think?" She turned her attention to Jen, putting on a condescending smile. "And who is this child with you? Are you a friend of Zoe's?"
Bette would have given anything at that moment to have been filming Shelly's reaction—the shocked, wide-eyed look that was quickly replaced with cool, tight-lipped anger. She was secretly proud of her mother. Bette heard Kerrie let out a soft snort beside her and gently elbowed the taller woman in the rib while trying to contain her own laughter.
Jen's face quickly became red, and she huffed, but Jen wasn't as smooth as Shelly. Shelly gave the briefest shake of her head to Jen and plastered on a fake smile. "No, this is not Zoe's friend. This is my girlfriend, Jen."
Looking indifferent, Clara shrugged slightly. "My apologies, June."
"It's Jen," stressed the bright blonde through clenched teeth. She looked lovely in her bodycon beige dress, so tight that the outline of her belly button showed, and her black heels were paired with a nice leather shoulder bag. Her hair was a little too slicked down. The outfit gave the impression the young woman was trying to look sophisticated but didn't quite know how to pull it off. Bette almost felt bad for Jen. She probably felt every bit of the weight of judgment from those around her.
"All right, so why don't we get a few pictures, and then let's go to the house? I'm starving," interjected Zoe. She was always really good at redirection.
Pictures were a slightly awkward affair, but they managed to get a few in without much of an issue. They would take formal ones after lunch.
"Your mother is brutal," said Kerrie when they got back in the truck. She turned it on, and they both let out a sigh as cool air began flowing out of the vents. This old truck has a great AC .
With her eyes closed, Bette took a couple of deep breaths, her head leaned back on the headrest, and nodded. "That she is. I absolutely loved what she said to Shelly, though. My mother and Shelly never got along. Two narcissists butting heads with me in the middle for over 20 years of fights."
"I can only imagine the kind of throwdowns those two would have had. I did kind of feel bad for Jen. She looked as if she was trying her best to fit in, but I don't think she has the confidence to do it yet."
"Yeah, I think you're right. I really want to dislike her, especially because she did know that Shelly was married when they began their affair, but I can't help but feel like she's a lamb among wolves."