24. Silas
TWENTY-FOUR
SILAS
PRESENT DAY
It was two in the morning before Natty stopped moving every time I tried to slip my arm out from under her. She had a shattered heart, and all I wanted to do was stay here and help hold her together. But the Stone Riders who went after Fable didn’t catch him, and now that I knew how he had gotten inside, I needed to find him.
The only person who I had at my disposal that I could interrogate was Alec, which meant I needed to leave Natty in bed. I ensured my men were still watching over her as I exited the room. They were on high alert because of Fable slipping through, although Killian had patrols monitoring the entire property now. I still wanted a man below her window, at the back door, the front and outside her door.
It was dark as I slipped through the halls and outside. The stars weren’t out, leaving the sky dark and the breeze cold as I swiftly made my way to the outlier garage where they were keeping my brother.
I entered through the side door, seeing there were three Stone Riders watching over him. This club had a less obvious location for holding prisoners, near the border of their property. I knew this because I’d used it to interrogate Luke Holloway when he started this bullshit war with my father, his dad, and Jefferson Quinn. I assumed they weren’t using it currently, simply because of Rachel returning, and then what happened tonight with Red and Brooks.
Alec was cuffed to a lead pipe that connected under a few rows of concrete. He was slumped against the wall, his ass resting against the floor while his leg was kicked out in front of him.
The guards saw me and paused.
“Not asking you to leave him unguarded but give us some space to talk.”
They glanced at each other and wandered over to the corner of the garage where they lit up two cigarettes and turned on a game, illuminating that darker corner with the light from the television screen.
Alec’s gaze tracked my movements as I pulled up a chair and sat in front of him, leaning forward with my forearms on my knees.
“What’s your angle with this?”
Alec’s lip curled as he pulled his leg back, bending his knee.
“Angle?”
“Fable sends you with a message to me, right as we rescue Rachel, then he shows up the same night, and kills two of their members…What’s the angle?”
My brother chuckled, shaking his head. His hair was greasy, slicked back, and his t-shirt seemed to have stains all over it. I noticed his cut was missing.
“After you cut my fucking hand off, I had to find a way to staunch the bleeding on my own…one fucking handed. Then I took one of the trucks left by the guards and drove myself to a nearby club doctor. He did a shit job of patching me up in case you want to look at the gruesome scar I now have. I look like something Frankenstein botched.”
I inspected my nail, growing tired of his sob story. “You seem fine to me.”
“Yeah, well, it took me a few days to recover. Once I did, I returned to what was left of my club. We’d scattered to a few safe houses, and Dad found me there.”
Fuck, how was he always able to locate where we’d been?
“Fable informed me that he was coming for Natty. I tried to fight him, but I was still too weak from the loss of blood. He knocked me out. When I woke up, he’d left me with the message and my severed hand. I panicked and made my way here; they found me on the way.”
Right. I stood, pacing in front of him. “So you were worried about Natty…and decided to just come for her…and the timing of it all just happened?—”
“I don’t give a fuck what you think, Silas. It’s the truth. I messed up with her…I didn’t think—” Alec turned his face, regret and remorse warring it out through his features.
“You didn’t think.” I kicked his boot to encourage him to continue.
His gaze swung back in my direction. “I didn’t think she’d hate me…I thought maybe she’d eventually fall for me. Close proximity and shit.”
The top part of his cheeks flushed the smallest bit, and I had to hold back a laugh.
“You assumed my wife might fall for you if you chained her to you and masturbated in front of her, then forced her to stand there while you ejaculated against her skin?”
The flush on his skin worsened.
“I know, I fucked up. I owe her an apology…I owe her more than that, but I’d like to start by trying to fix this. And for the last time, I didn’t know you were married.”
“Even if we weren’t, she wouldn’t have fallen for the proximity routine. Natty can’t be forced into doing anything. I think at one point she was fond of you, Brother. She had a soft spot at least, especially after that Christmas.” I hung my head hating the memory of how she’d turned to him. “But she would have never fallen for you.”
Alec’s eyes narrowed on me as he tried to adjust how he was seated on the floor. His boot slid against the concrete as his voice sharpened.
“And what of your failures, Silas? She forgave you so easily for overlooking the abuse she endured at Dirk’s hand?”
My stomach flipped then strained.
“What do you know about that?”
Flashbacks of conversations, gut feelings and assumptions all slammed into me, but nothing had ever been confirmed. By anyone.
The look in Alec’s eyes was like he’d just won a bet. He was going to enjoy ruining me, this I was certain of.
“I take it you were never told? ”
“Why would you assume that?” I pushed my hands into my pockets, hating how vulnerable this made me.
Alec’s face tilted. “For one, Dirk would have died two years ago, not six months ago. Two, you would have burned the entire fucking club to the ground…as you did with mine.”
That panicked feeling rushed back. The unknown creating a frenzy under my sternum. The only choice I had was to remain silent because I had no clue what he was talking about.
My brother leaned closer, which tugged at his good hand, making the metal clank.
“Natty ever mysteriously break a bone, or have a scar that showed up…maybe a burn?”
She’d said it was work. Tripping. The grove when she’s tried to climb over a fence.
Dirk even said…
“He knew he couldn’t get away with much because you would return home, but every time you left, he played with your wife. He toyed with her, broke her. Hurt her. Burned her.”
No .
My feet faltered as my gaze snapped to his. Why did the floor feel like it was falling out from under me?
“Natty would beg you, right? She’d beg you not to leave…anything else feel rushed or like she was panicked about it?”
I fell to the chair, and nearly missed as memory after memory flashed through my mind.
Our wedding, she’d been practically desperate to marry me, and it had to be that night…because I left the following day.
He had been hurting her.
Christmas…she had begged me and seemed frantic that I return.
“Did he…” My voice cracked as I looked down at my hands. “She came to you that December…”
Alec’s chin dipped. “I found out later…but yes. She’d gone back home, and Dirk was there. Your mom was gone, and you weren’t coming back…she was terrified, so she came to me.”
Fuck, my chest was cracking open; there was no other explanation for this pain .
Alec continued, his own voice going hoarse. “One of the Raiders would brag about what Dirk did to Natty, which meant he must have occasionally done things where people saw. I guess one time, he had her lower her bra cup so he could extinguish a cigarette against her tit.”
The burn looked as though it was a curling iron incident…she’d covered up what he’d done to her, so it looked like she had done it to herself.
She’d covered for Dirk for years. Fucking years she was abused by him…until?—
“Things escalated, obviously which is why she was traded. Sasha saw what Dirk did to Natty one night…it was enough to scare her into calling Simon Stone and beg him to get Natty away from the Raiders.”
Simon didn’t take her… he had rescued her.
My mind was in free fall. Failure and loss warring for first place in my head, my heart, my lungs, my fucking blood stream.
I’d let her down so profusely…how had she never told me any of this?
My voice was more of a rasp when I asked, “How did you find out?”
Alec’s glare could cut stone, but his next words essentially did, and I knew I’d never be the same after.
“Raiders talking shit mostly, but Natty confirmed the rest.”
I glared at him feeling more hatred for my brother than I ever thought possible. I never assumed my wife would really betray me with her relationship with him. I knew she loved me; I knew she wanted me.
But this…she had never once told me.
Even when I had suspicions and concerns…she had lied to me. Covered for him. Allowed me to leave and put her in danger.
My brother knew her deepest, darkest pain…and still, reunited, she didn’t want to share it with me? I’d always shared my pain with her.
Always…I had never held it back.
How could she keep this from me?
I needed to talk to my mother…she’d been the one here, and the one telling me to go. I needed to get her perspective on this.
I stood, ignored what Alec said at my back and navigated my way back to my bike.
My mother was asleep when I arrived on her doorstep and was understandably upset when I continued to rap my knuckles against her door.
I understood it was the middle of the night, but I also wasn’t fully in control of my body…I felt like I was in a nightmare, watching myself walk and maneuver through the dark as if I’d already lost Natty and there was no reclaiming her.
The porch light came on, and my mother’s door swung open, revealing a very pissed off and angry Simon Stone.
“The fuck are you doing here at nearly three in the morning?”
“I need to speak to my mother.”
His jaw flexed, the muscle in it jumping as if he were deliberating on kicking my ass. I wouldn’t put it past him. He might be fighting cancer but the fucker was hard as nails and ruthless.
“She’s asleep, Silas. Come back tomorrow when she’s awake.”
He was about to close the door but I stopped it with my hand against the wood. “It’s important.”
“Silas?” My mother’s groggy voice came from inside the house. She came into view a second later, tying the sash of her robe and wincing at the porch light.
“I need to speak with you.”
She let out a sigh but gave a small nod.
Simon reluctantly moved and secured the door behind me while I sat down on my mother’s couch.
She took the seat across from me in an armchair while Simon walked back to the room, muttering a few curses as he went.
“This is the second time you’ve woken us up, Son.”
I wasn’t in the mood to be the dutiful son, or the one who grew up loving and cherishing my mother for her sacrifices. I felt betrayed by the two women who had loved me unconditionally and my gut told me the core of that deceit started with the woman in front of me.
“You never told me what Dirk did to Natty.”
My mother’s blue eyes went from sleepy to alert in a single second .
She didn’t respond, so I continued.
“When she was traded, you alluded to it being for the sake of her staying safe and told me I couldn’t do anything because it would start a war.”
Her dark hair dipped as she agreed. “It would have.”
“You failed to mention that it’s a war I would have gladly fought. One I would have endured, sacrificed, and readily ended from.” My voice shook with rage and hurt. They wound together like a knot at the base of my throat.
“Silas, at the time, you needed The Death Raiders. You were working on taking your father down. You did the right thing by allowing her to stay with the Stone Riders.”
My gaze was frozen, so ice cold that I don’t think I imagined it when my mother flinched. “Fuck the right thing. Fuck The Death Raiders and fuck my father. This is the only warning you’ll receive from me that I’m leaving. Don’t try and find me. Good luck with the rest of your fucking life.”
I stood, ready to leave when she bolted after me, grabbing hold of my shirt.
“Silas…wait. You can’t just show up and lay this entire thing on me. I was doing the best thing?—”
I spun on her, my voice rising. “You removed me from the equation. You didn’t give me a choice. You encouraged my wife to lie to me for years, Mother! Fucking years. She endured abuse…do you have any?—”
My voice broke, tears welled and my heart broke.
“Do you have any idea what it was like to discover from someone other than her, or even you that she had to turn to other people for protection? While you may be right that you were trying to do the right thing, you were also pushing me to leave. You consistently told me to sabotage Fable, and what good did it do for any of us? He’s back and now he’s after my wife. I lost her for two motherfucking years, Mother.” I was shaking from how angry I’d become and when she only pursed her lips in defiance, I screamed, “TWO YEARS!”
Simon slammed a door from inside the house and began walking toward us with a shotgun.
“Get the fuck out. ”
My mother’s eyes watered as she put a hand on his chest but the gun was leveled at me.
“Fable killed two members tonight. Red and Brooks. Just so you’re aware.” I said to Simon, then glared at my mother.
“We’re through here.”
It was nearly dawn when I stopped outside the doors of my club. No one was up, and that was good because I wasn’t in the mood to see anyone.
Exhaustion tugged at me, but so did heartache and hurt. Unfortunately, they won over me heading into my room and falling asleep.
I parked my bike, and then took off toward the garage where the gasoline was kept. Distantly, I was aware that this was insane, but I’d never felt this broken before. Not after having to crucify people. Not after having to kill, maim, and torture for my father. Not enduring burns and scars from him.
Nothing had ever cut my heart the way realizing I’d let her down did.
Carrying two large gas cans back to my old house, I didn’t even stop at the door, I kicked it in. Memories of sitting at the kitchen table with Natty while we learned Latin flittered through my mind. I remembered watching her mouth the words, so focused she never noticed how often I’d look at her.
If I were a masochist I’d walk into our old room and I’d allow those memories to build and overwhelm me like one of those rogue, sneaker waves.
Instead, I started pouring.
He’d hurt her in this house. Fuck if I knew how often. He’d terrorized her in the place she lived. The memory of when she’d been too hot because she was too afraid to open the windows came back. It was because of him.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
I doused it all .
Every room was lathered in gasoline and as I turned my back, I grabbed my zippo and clicked it, then tossed it inside.
It caught fire instantly. I took my cut off, and the leather jacket I’d had with me and tossed them both inside.
Lance ran out of the club, coming toward me, frantic.
He should know that frantic didn’t work around me.
“Get any original members that rode with Dirk out here,” I mused, walking back into the garage.
I had a bag buried in the concrete that I used to use when I was with my father. I pulled it free and slowly unzipped it.
I could almost feel the contents inside whisper a “ welcome home .” This deranged darkness always flirted with my consciousness. Natty would always bring me back, but how would I ever go back to her knowing I’d let her down like that?
While she was bearing all my burdens, she was being consumed by her own.
Buried.
Then I punished her for leaving me. I assumed she wanted to be free of me, that it was just Christmas all over again, where she found solace somewhere else. Angry that I was always gone and needing a different change, but knowing I’d never let her go.
Fuck, how badly I’d ruined her.
Madness crept inside the fringes of my mind and for once I welcomed it.
“There’s about fifteen original members.” Lance said from behind me.
I took the bag and began rummaging for wood.
“Good, they can help build the crosses.”
I turned to inspect my friend, who had his hand on his gun. Smart move.
“Crosses?”
With the duffle dangling in one hand, I had a few boards gripped in my other while walking back toward the yard.
The flames from my house were growing, licking at the sky while members started screaming and scrambling.
“Now might be a good time for everyone else to evacuate the club. ”
Lance glanced at the burning house and then let his gaze settle back on me.
“I’ll have it done. What are the crosses for, Silas?”
A group of terrified men were on their knees being kept in place by a few of my loyal men. Guns trained on them. Most of them were in their boxers, pajamas and underwear.
A few bunk bunnies and Sweetbutts came outside, half-naked.
“Get them out of here.”
I let my bag drop and then pulled out the first iron stake that would be driven through one of these motherfucker’s hands.
“Silas…” Lance got my attention. “The crosses?”
“We’re crucifying them. Every last person who knew what Dirk was doing to my wife.”