9. Dakota
Chapter 9
Dakota
I ’d been out mending fenceposts for half the morning and so far, the only thing I managed to think about other than Logan was how much I hated digging post holes. And even then, it wasn’t very often Logan left my mind. It had been that way ever since I woke up with his head in my lap, his lips less than an inch from my cock. How was I supposed to forget something like that?
I kept trying to tell myself that it didn’t matter what I was feeling. That sort of thing just couldn’t happen between us. Logan was a nice guy, but he was kind of a mess at the moment. No offense to him of course, I understood. I’d been there myself plenty of times. In fact, sometimes I thought I was still there. But that didn’t mean I wanted to get burned either.
Fuck… maybe I was just scared.
Either way, no amount of overthinking the entire situation made me want him any less. And it especially didn’t wipe the memory of his head in my lap from my mind. I liked that far too much to forget it. The moment he was out that door in the morning, I was back in the bathroom, my cock out and in my hand. How was I supposed to resist something that strong? He was gorgeous, sweet, and a bit of an asshole. Weirdly, that was my type down to a tee.
I wiped the sweat from my brow and leaned on my shovel, gazing out over the rolling prairie. The grass swayed in the hot Texas breeze, and I could see the heat waves shimmering on the horizon. My thoughts drifted back to Logan once more, as they inevitably did.
What would it be like to run my fingers through his sandy brown hair? To trace the lines of his muscular body with my hands? I shook my head, trying to clear the images from my mind. This was dangerous territory. The last thing I needed was another boner in the middle of trying to get my job done.
I resumed my work, driving the shovel into the hard-packed earth with more force than necessary. The physical exertion helped distract me, if only momentarily. But as I worked, I couldn’t help but think about how Logan’s tanned skin would look glistening with sweat under the hot sun.
“Get it together,” I muttered to myself. We were friends, and that was it. That’s all it could be. A piece of ass wasn’t worth losing my home over.
I drove the shovel into the ground again, grunting with the effort. The sun beat down mercilessly, and I could feel sweat trickling down my back. I tried to focus on the task at hand unsuccessfully.
What if I was wrong? What if there was a chance for something more between us? The thought sent a thrill through me, followed quickly by a wave of anxiety. I’d been burned before, and the scars still hadn’t fully healed. It cost me my life back then, and I didn’t want to repeat that.
I paused, leaning on my shovel again and taking a long drink from my water bottle. As I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand, I felt a familiar buzz in my pocket followed by the jingling ringtone. Pulling off one of my gloves, I grabbed my phone and saw ‘Mom’ at the top of the screen. My belly lurched as I hit the green button. Usually when she called, it wasn’t good news.
“Hey Mom,” I said, trying to sound happy and not worried.
“Hey honey,” she replied, her voice bright and smiling. “How are you?”
I sighed in relief. Whew. At least this wasn’t a bad call.
“I’m doing fine. Just mending fenceposts. How are you?”
“I’m amazing,” she laughed. “I left your father!”
My breath caught in my throat as I froze up. Maybe this wasn’t a good call. But then again, she sounded so happy.
“You… You did?”
“Yep! Packed my things up a couple nights ago and decided I was done with all that.”
“Oh…” I wasn’t sure what to say. Mom had been putting up with his drunk tirades for years. She didn’t like them, but she was always talking about keeping the family together. “Did something happen?”
“Well, he got drunk again,” she sighed. “And this time he put himself in the hospital.”
“What happened?”
“Oh, he tried to hit me,” she chuckled.
“HE WHAT?!” My blood was boiling in an instant.
“Don’t worry, he missed,” she added, trying to calm me down. “But I didn’t. And when I punched him in the face, he fell down the stairs.” She let out another long sigh. “He doesn’t remember anything, so I just told the paramedics he fell. He’s already got a reputation with them, anyway.”
“I… wow…” I said at last. “I’m kinda proud of you.”
“It felt good, I won’t lie. But I’m out of there now. Already called the lawyer and everything. However, in the meantime, I’m in Sagebrush!”
My heart dropped right out my butt. “You… You what?”
“Yeah! Isn’t that fun?!”
I wasn’t sure what to say. Not once in five years had my mother come to visit me. And now she’d left home, packed her things, and come to Sagebrush? She knew I lived in a tiny two-room cabin on the ranch, it wasn’t like I had a place for her to crash. Besides, she was so involved with the tribal government. She even worked for the tribal center on the reservation. What the hell was she doing all the way out here?
“Mom, that’s... unexpected,” I managed to say, my mind racing. “Where are you staying?”
“Oh, don’t you worry about that, honey. I’ve got a room at the Sagebrush Inn for now. I just wanted to surprise you!” Her voice was chipper, but I could hear a hint of uncertainty underneath.
I took a deep breath, trying to process everything. “Well, you certainly succeeded there. How long are you planning to stay?”
“I’m not sure yet,” she replied. “I thought I’d play it by ear. Maybe look around, see what Sagebrush has to offer. Who knows? I might even decide to settle down here!”
The idea of my mother living in Sagebrush sent a jolt of panic through me. Don’t get me wrong, I loved her, but the thought of her being so close, potentially prying into every aspect of my life, was terrifying.
“Settle down here?” I echoed, my voice cracking slightly. “Mom, are you sure that’s a good idea? I mean, what about your job at the tribal center?”
“Oh, I can work remotely for now,” she said breezily. “And who knows? Maybe I’ll find something new here. It’s time for a change, don’t you think?”
I swallowed hard, trying to keep the panic out of my voice. “Yeah, I guess so. But Mom, Sagebrush is pretty different from the reservation. Are you sure you’ll be happy here?”
“I’m sure I’ll be happier than I was with your father,” she said, her tone hardening slightly. “Besides, I miss you, honey. We hardly ever see each other anymore.”
Guilt twisted in my gut. It was true, I hadn’t been home much in the past few years.
“Mom… people around here… well, they aren’t exactly fond of people like us. Nobody hardly talks to me as it is.”
“You telling me that this town isn’t gonna like having a Cherokee princess in town?” she joked, her voice high and girlish.
“Everyone in town thinks they’re related to one,” I sighed. “So maybe.”
“Well, I’ll set them straight, don’t you worry about me. I’ve got a lifetime of experience dealing with white folks who don’t know better. I ain’t bothered one bit.”
“Are you sure?”
There was a long pause. “Do you want me to go somewhere else?”
Guilt flooded my chest, and I cleared my throat. “No. Of course not. I just… well, I had to leave home for a reason you know.”
“Honey,” she said gently, but firmly. “I don’t give a rat’s hairy nutsack what kind of people you date. You’re my son. That’s all that matters.” She paused for a moment. “I… I hope you haven’t been thinking this entire time that I didn’t support you.”
“I didn’t know,” I whispered, feeling tears come to my eyes. “Or at least, I wasn’t sure.”
“I’m sorry honey,” she replied at last. “I should’ve said something. When your father drove you off… I did everything I could to change his mind. But you know how he is.”
“Yeah. I know.”
“I’ve always been on your side, baby. Don’t ever doubt that.”
I was glad she couldn’t see the tears falling down my cheeks. “Thanks Mom.”
“Of course. Now, where is this ranch of yours? I’m in town right now and I’d like to take my boy out to lunch.”
“You don’t have to?—”
“That wasn’t a request,” she interrupted. “What ranch is it? Barker? Beluga?”
“Baker Ranch.”
“Got it. Can you text me the address?”
“Sure thing.”
“See you in a half hour. I can’t wait to hug you!”
I smiled, happier than I thought I would be to see family again. “See you soon.”
I ended the call and stared at my phone for a moment, my mind reeling. My mother was here, in Sagebrush. After five years of barely any contact, she’d suddenly left my father and shown up out of the blue. And she was supportive of me. It was a lot to process.
I quickly texted her the ranch address, then pocketed my phone and looked around at the half-finished fencepost. There was no way I’d get this done before she arrived. I’d have to explain to Mr. Baker why I was cutting out early.
As I gathered my tools, my thoughts drifted back to Logan. What would he think about my mother being in town? Would he want to meet her? The idea made me both excited and nervous. It wasn’t like we were together. There’d be no reason for him to meet her. Then again, once the Baker’s found out she was in town, I had no doubt the entire family would invite her over for dinner at the very least.
I trudged back to the barn, my boots kicking up little puffs of dust. The heat was oppressive, and I could feel sweat trickling down my back as I walked. My mind was still reeling from the conversation with my mom. Part of me was thrilled to see her after so long, but another part was terrified of what her presence in Sagebrush might mean for my carefully constructed life here. And another part of me, the part I didn’t want to admit, was still mad at her for not standing up for me in front of everyone. She might’ve accepted me, but up until five minutes ago, I’d never known.
As I approached the barn, I saw a familiar SUV pulling down the driveway. It was Logan’s. Seeing me, he pulled off to the side and rolled his window down, that bright smile of his making my heart do a little flip. Fuck he was handsome.
“Hey,” he called out as I got closer. “You’re back early. Everything okay?”
I nodded, trying to keep my voice steady. “Yeah, just got a surprise call and need to head into town.” I wasn’t quite ready to tell Logan about my mom yet. “Nothin’ serious.”
“Do you want a lift?” he asked, gesturing to the passenger seat. “I’m headed that way.”
“It’s alright. Someone is picking me up.”
Logan’s face darkened, his smile fading. “Oh. Gotcha.”
I knew what he was thinking the moment he spoke. “It’s not like that.” I didn’t know why I was smoothing things over. It wasn’t like Logan and I were together. “It’s… just business.”
“Well, I hope it goes well,” he replied, trying to smile once more.
“Thanks.”
Logan looked like he was about to leave, but then he stopped. “Say… do you want to hang out tonight?”
I stared at him, everything in my heart and body shouting at me to tell him yes. But I swallowed it down, forcing myself to remain calm.
“Probably not tonight.”
“Oh. Yeah. Okay. No problem.” His eyes darted around, avoiding making contact with mine. “Well, have a good meeting. See ya.”
The SUV pulled away and I felt my heart sink. I didn’t like making him upset, but it was too hard to resist him right now after everything that had happened. Plus, my mom was in town too and that was stressful enough without having to resist Logan too. No, right now, we just needed to stay apart. I had too much on my plate and he had his own life to work on. Maybe once we were both done figuring things out, we could try again.
For now, it was better to be alone.