Chapter 28 – Reese
FALLING IN LOVE IS LIKE GOING MAD
REESE
Iwoke up with my arms wrapped around Dakota from behind, my face tucked into the back of his neck, my fingers linked with his over his chest, and my cock buried deep inside his ass.
The laziest pleasure sang through my body as I slowly pumped into him. He pushed back onto me every time I drove forward, pulling me deeper and deeper.
The sticky, hazy edges of sleep gradually broke apart and melted away, and the absolute ecstasy shooting through my body had me squeezing him tighter, pressing into him even deeper.
“Dakota,” I whispered, my voice a soft rasp against his skin.
He shuddered against me, then slid a hand over my hip, squeezed, then curved his palm over my ass. “You finally awake?”
The familiar amusement in his voice made me want to bite him, to push him onto his stomach and hold him down while I slid my cock along the spot that drove him over the edge.
“How long have we been doing this?”
“Mm, half an hour? Hard to say, I haven’t been able to get up to loo—unngh.” He moaned and jerked against me, his fingers digging hard into my ass, then trembled and whispered, “Fuck.”
“Turn over,” I told him, barely able to think. He shifted onto his stomach with a groan, mushing his face into the pillow and arching his back. I slid my hands over his, weaving our fingers together and holding tight.
“Ah, fuck, Reese, you feel so good, so fucking good,” he panted, rocking his hips the tiniest fraction.
I pulled out of him until just my crown was inside, then slowly, slowly, slowly pressed my way deeper, inch by excruciating inch.
Dakota’s fingers were squeezing mine so hard he was shaking, and the long, continuous moan that shuddered past his lips was so full of bliss that it pierced through the final cobwebs of sleep and sent me hurtling over the edge.
I bit into his shoulder as I spilled inside him, then collapsed on top of him.
“Fuck,” I said breathlessly.
“Mmhmm,” he hummed, turning his face to the side so he could see me. Or breathe, probably.
I kissed his cheek. “Did you come?”
“Yeah. Like, twice. You, however, took your sweet time. Kept saying you were gonna ruin me, and then just fucked me so gently.” He laughed. “You give it to me slow even in your sleep.”
Good. I was always afraid I’d lose it and get too rough, but every time this happened, he told me I was nothing but a gentleman—emphasis on the gentle.
It was a little chilly in the room, but we were sticky with sweat. I rolled off him, my softening cock slipping from inside him. I looked down at the condom full of my cum.
“I put a condom on?”
Dakota stayed on his stomach and threw his arm across my chest. “No, I did that. With my mouth,” he said with a self-satisfied smirk. “I mean, not all of it, your dick is way too big, but I got it over the tip with my mouth. Then I used my hands.”
“Let’s try that again when I’m awake,” I said, trailing my fingers over his forearm.
“Mmhmm.”
I breathed in his scent, which was no longer smoky, just sweet now that he’d stopped smoking.
I wouldn’t ever tell him, but I was going to miss the smoky scent.
I was going to miss everything about him.
My throat started to tighten up, so I took a deep breath and shut my eyes.
Fuck.
This would be the last time I’d ever wake up like this.
“Come on, let’s go shower,” I said. “You’re gonna be late for class.”
“It’ll be your fault.” He brought one of my hands to his mouth and bit my finger, then slid his tongue around it.
“It definitely won’t,” I said, reluctantly pulling my hand away and pushing him toward the edge of the bed.
He jumped off with a laugh, then grabbed me up and threw me over his shoulder as I shrieked, carrying me into the bathroom and slamming the door behind us.
“What’s this?” I eyed the gold Zippo he was holding out to me.
“I’ve officially quit. I want you to have it.”
Oh, fuck. I’d known he’d stopped but didn’t realize it was official, wasn’t sure if it was for good. God, I was so fucking proud of him.
I jumped up and he immediately caught me and wrapped his arms around my waist as I wound my legs around him and squeezed.
I framed his face with my hands, the affection coursing through me making me feel insanely aggressive.
He was so damn pretty. His face was a gorgeous collection of the most beautiful, distinctive features that I’d never get tired of looking at.
“What the hell am I gonna do with a lighter?” I murmured against his lips.
“Hmm, good question. Light up my life?”
I rolled my eyes, then pressed a soft kiss to those perfect lips and said, “I’m really proud of you, you know that? In spite of everything you’ve gone through, you turned out like this. You’re amazing, Dakota. And you should be proud of yourself, too.”
I wasn’t sure I’d ever forget the look he gave me then, so filled with love and affection and a deep, contented peace laced with awe.
He didn’t say a word, just slid one hand up my back until he was cradling my head, his fingers tugging at my hair as he slipped his tongue inside my mouth with a small groan.
He walked forward until my back smacked into the wall, and then both his hands were holding my head, moving me the way he wanted me.
I threaded my fingers through his hair and thrust my tongue into his mouth, then nipped at his lips, trailing tiny bites down his jaw and pulling his head back so I could get to his throat.
“Fuck,” he rasped, sliding his hands down to my ass. He started to move me against him, and I moaned into his neck. “Bite me. I want—”
He cut off on a moan as I sank my teeth into his throat and sucked.
I’d leave a mark so indelible it would never fade. He’d never be rid of me. Every time he looked in the mirror, he’d be reminded of his love for me.
It was cruel and selfish and I couldn’t stop myself from biting down harder so I could feel him squeeze me even tighter, moan even louder.
I licked the spot I’d just ruined, nipped his ear, and murmured, “You’re seriously gonna be late for class.” His full-body shiver was deliciously satisfying.
“What class,” he said breathlessly, his broad hands kneading my ass. He touched his forehead to mine and slid his fingers under my shirt at my back, tracing into and around the dimples above my ass. “I love these.”
I’d never have this again, I knew that. These months with Dakota had been the best of my life; they were irreplaceable. I’d never find another person like him again—and I didn’t want to.
I just wanted to keep these memories in a safe box, to keep it close to my heart and remember that I’d had something perfect once. Something precious.
I’d had it…and ruined it.
Tears pricked at my eyes, and I tried to blink them away.
I would go back if I could.
Do things differently.
I wasn’t sure what, maybe tell him the truth from the start, love him better, the way he deserved, but it was too late for that now.
“What’s the matter?”
“Hm? What do you mean?”
He brushed his finger beneath my eye. “You look sad this morning. What’s on your mind? And as much as I want you to say me, I hope it’s not because I never want to make you sad.”
I didn’t want to make him sad, either, but I was about to rip his heart into pieces. That beautiful, honest heart he’d given to me so eagerly.
The thought made me nauseous, and I lowered my gaze as I tried to swallow past the thick lump in my throat. “Nothing’s the matter, I’m just a little tired.”
“You slept through the night, though. Other than the morning sex. Well, actually, that counts since you were sleeping through most of it.”
I shrugged and fiddled with the hair at the nape of his neck. It was so soft. “I guess it wasn’t restful. I dunno. I’m just tired this morning, it’s fine.”
“I thought you were done lying to me,” he said softly, brushing his nose against mine.
I almost blurted everything out right then and there; a rush of sadness mixed with an intense fondness barreled through me so fast it practically shoved every truth from my chest.
“Who’s lying?” I whispered. My throat was getting too tight; I probably wouldn’t even be able to speak soon. “Because it would never be me.”
“Oh, no, of course not. Never you.” He drew his finger down my nose, then kissed my cheek. “I’ll see you soon.”
He set me down, turned to leave, and panic sliced through me.
“Dakota, wait,” I rushed out, grabbing his hand.
He looked back at me with a raised a brow, and I let my gaze slowly memorize every beautiful inch of his face.
The freckles. The scar. His long nose, his narrow eyes, the freckle in the corner of his bottom lip, the two bigger ones beneath his left eye.
The way he looked at me with so much affection that it hurt.
He was everything, my entire world, the final missing piece of my soul.
He was right here in front of me, and I would never see him again after this moment.
I love you.
You’ve become everything to me, and I love you more than I could ever say.
I can’t tell you because it’ll only make it harder for the both of us.
I can’t tell you because I’m a coward.
If I ever let those three words fall from my lips, I’d never be able to leave him. I’d lose myself completely when he learned of my betrayal and tossed me aside.
“Good luck on your test,” I pushed past the lump in my throat. I tried to smile and wasn’t sure how it looked. It felt as sad and pathetic and fragile as my heart.
He studied me for a moment, and I thought he would call me out on how weird I was acting, thought he would tell me to stop lying to him. But he just winked at me, leaned in with a smile, and kissed me on the cheek.
Right on my birthmark.
Then he nipped at it playfully and said, “I’m the luckiest man in the world because I’ve got you, darling.”
Oh, fuck.
There was a knife in my chest, and I wanted to leave it buried there. It hurt more than anything to not break down right then and there, to try and keep smiling until he left the room.