Chapter 19 Mackenzie
“You’re extra snarky this morning,” Parker said. “Did you wake up on the wrong side of bed?”
We’d started training at six and I’d been feeling like crap all morning.
Obviously, I wasn’t doing a very good job of hiding it.
I’d slept badly, going over the latest argument with my dad all night, and now I struggled to focus.
I was slow and sluggish, and it felt like every time a shot got past me, I was only proving my father right. Still, I pasted on a smile for Parker.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I don’t have a wrong side of bed.”
“Right.” He slapped a hand against his forehead. “I forgot, raccoons sleep in dumpsters.”
“I’m not a raccoon!”
“You’re scrappy and you leave a trail of chaos wherever you go. It’s very raccoon-like.”
It was too early to be arguing about raccoons with Parker. And while he probably thought being called scrappy and chaotic was an insult, I actually took it as a compliment.
“Can you just keep shooting?”
“I’ve scored five in a row,” he said. “You’re not concentrating. Are you too tired for this?”
I was exhausted, but that didn’t matter. “I don’t have time to be tired. I need to get ready for the weekend.”
“Well, playing like this isn’t going to get you ready. It’s going to get you injured.”
“I’ll be fine.”
“You won’t be if you keep going. You’re clearly stiff and hurting. That last save attempt was agonizing to watch. My grandma could have gotten off the floor quicker than you did.”
“Your grandma must be a beast.”
He smirked. “She’s in a nursing home, Mackenzie.”
I swallowed as he said my name. Only a few days ago he’d been deliberately getting my name wrong just to piss me off.
Now suddenly he was worried about me hurting myself and getting enough sleep.
I quickly dismissed the thought. He didn’t really care about me.
All he cared about was winning, and for some reason, right now, he thought I was his best chance of achieving that.
“I didn’t sleep well, that’s all. Keep shooting, I’ll save the next one.”
“No, I think that’s enough for this morning. We’d be better off spending some time stretching.”
“Stretching?”
“Yep. We’ve got practice tonight with the rest of the team. You need to save your energy for that.”
“So, we’re done?”
“Out here? Sure.”
Grumbling under my breath, I started skating for the boards. I wasn’t sure why we’d even bothered with training this morning; it had been a complete waste of time. As I left the ice and started for the locker room, Parker called after me.
“I’ll meet you in the warm-up room.”
I sighed. He was serious about the stretching? I almost considered bailing, but I couldn’t deny how stiff and sore I was.
There were a few figure skaters heading out of the warm-up room as I arrived, so it was just Parker left when I stepped inside.
He was in the back corner, already stretching, and the corner of his mouth started to lift as I walked toward him.
Parker’s smile always made me feel like I’d missed a joke.
Either that, or he just found my mere existence highly amusing.
“You made it,” he said. “Thought you might make like a raccoon and scurry out of here.”
My exasperated expression only made him chuckle.
I hated that sound. It was deep and rumbly, and it lit up his eyes, making them impossibly blue.
Maybe I was just jealous of how cheery he seemed to be, considering the sun wasn’t even up yet and I was already wishing I could crawl back into my dumpster.
I sat on the floor beside him and stretched one leg out in front of me, reaching my hands down to grip my foot.
“Let’s just get this over with,” I said. The sooner we finished stretching, the sooner we could go our separate ways for the day.
“So, does your dad hate all women playing sports, or does he just have special rules for his daughter?” Apparently, Parker hadn’t understood I’d been planning to stretch in silence.
“I thought you wanted my bad mood gone,” I replied.
“I never said that. I don’t mind you being in a bad mood. It’s like a challenge; can I make it worse?”
“There’s something wrong with you. You know that, right?”
“What?” he protested. “I happen to think raccoons are cute when they’re angry.”
“Sounds like a good way to get bitten.”
He raised one eyebrow. “I mean, a guy can always hope.” There was something wolfish about the way he grinned at me, and the air between us seemed to crackle in response. I firmly ignored the sensation, even though it sent goosebumps down my arms.
“Sorry to disappoint, but my teeth aren’t going anywhere near you.”
“Bummer.” He didn’t look too disappointed. “Guess I’ll just have to be satisfied with your biting words.”
I ignored his jab as I adjusted my position. “You know, with all the gossip that goes around about you, I’m surprised I never heard how irritating you are.”
Parker shuffled around until his stretch matched mine. He made it look simple, while my muscles were screaming and begging for me to stop.
“So, you’ve been listening to gossip about me?” He looked delighted by the idea.
“It’s a little hard to avoid.”
“And what have you heard?”
“Oh, just the usual. Parker Darling, playboy party animal. Deadly to his opponents on the ice, devastating to girls’ hearts off it.”
“Sounds about right.” He smiled proudly.
“Is it true you started a cult?”
He leaned in close and smirked at me. “What if I did? You want to join?”
“I think there’s already more than enough people worshipping you around here.”
He was still grinning as he leaned back. “Sounds like you already know all my deep dark secrets. Stop avoiding yours. What’s your dad’s problem?”
Parker didn’t know when to give up. Why did he even care about my whole pathetic story?
“He’s always been protective when it comes to me. He thinks if I play, I’ll get hurt, and he doesn’t want me taking the risk.”
“So, he just bans you from the sport for life? Seems a bit extreme.”
“I guess he has his reasons.”
“Like what?”
I hesitated. Was I really about to open up to Parker Darling? Surprisingly, the thought didn’t horrify me. In fact, I found I actually wanted to share more, and the words spilled from my lips. “My mom died when I was little…”
“Oh.” His voice was soft and shock filled his eyes. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” I replied. “I was so young, I barely remember her.” I must have said the same thing a thousand times before. People didn’t want a complicated answer when they found out about my mom. It was far easier to pretend I felt nothing at all.
He sat in silence watching me, waiting for me to continue. I knew it would have been okay if I didn’t, but still, I found I wanted to. Maybe Parker could handle a little complication.
“My dad doesn’t say it, but sometimes I wonder if he worries about me a little more—well, a lot more—because he lost my mom. Don’t get me wrong, he’s totally overreacting, but I think it comes from a good place.”
“I’m sorry,” Parker said again. “That really sucks.” He paused and looked down at the ground before returning his gaze to mine. “He really doesn’t know how strong you are, though.”
The way he was looking at me made my breath catch. I managed to reply with a small shrug. “It doesn’t matter. He’s still never going to believe girls are as fast or as strong as boys. And they are pretty useful skills for hockey.”
“Clearly your dad hasn’t been on the end of your right hook.”
“Ha, ha.”
“And physicality aside, he’s missing the kind of strength that counts.”
“Which is?”
“Mental strength. I think most girls have got guys outmatched in that department. And that’s one of the most important attributes of a great hockey player. Especially a goalie.”
“Is that a compliment, Parker Darling?”
“I said, most girls. Clearly, I wasn’t talking about you.”
“Clearly.” I shook my head at him but couldn’t stop myself from smiling.
We held each other’s gaze a little longer than I expected and something in his expression shifted.
The way the air charged between us took me totally off guard.
I’d always thought looking into Parker’s eyes was a little dangerous, like boarding a dinghy in the middle of a stormy ocean.
It was wild and unpredictable, and all you could do was allow the waves to toss you about and pray you survived.
I was simply trying my best not to get swept away.
I needed an excuse to pull my eyes from his, so I shifted positions to stretch out my other leg. But, as I did, I felt a jolt of pain in my hamstring. I inhaled sharply and reached my hand to the back of my leg.
“Are you okay?” Parker asked.
“Yeah, I’m fine.” I tried to massage the spot that was hurting but winced as the muscle cramped.
“Lie down,” Parker responded. “I’ll help you stretch it out.”
“I said, I’m fine.”
“Has anyone ever told you how stubborn you are?”
I squinted at him through the pain shooting up my leg. “Has anyone told you how persistent you are?”
“Frequently. I like to think it’s one of my greatest strengths. So, you should probably just let me help.”
“But I don’t need your help.” Despite my words, I knew my face was still visibly contorted in pain.
“Fine. Don’t blame me when you’re limping your way through our next game.”
I huffed and lay back on the mat. “Okay, you win.”
Parker wore a satisfied smirk as he knelt beside me.
He took my ankle in one hand and rested his other hand on my thigh just above my knee.
I swallowed as a shiver danced up my leg all the way to the back of my neck.
His strong hands were firm but gentle as he eased me into the stretch.
When my leg tensed, I let out a hiss, making me realize I’d been holding my breath.
Parker paused, a serious look on his face. “Am I hurting you?”
“No, no. It’s good.”
The sparkle instantly returned to his eyes. “How good?”
“Not that good,” I quickly corrected myself. “In fact, I hate this. It’s worse than the cramp.” It was a blatant lie. I didn’t want him to stop, and every place on my body his hands touched was tingling.
Parker smirked with delight, and when his hands shifted so he could deepen the stretch, the slight movement left a trail of fire across my leg. We were totally alone in here and the silence seemed heavy around us, like the room was holding its breath in anticipation.
Parker’s gaze didn’t move from mine, and I was too damn stubborn to look away first. I was determined to ride out the storm, but I felt dangerously close to capsizing.
There was so much intensity in his eyes, it was like he knew exactly how he was affecting me.
Whatever he was thinking, I hoped he kept it to himself.
“See, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re enjoying this.” Parker’s voice was low and hit me somewhere in my core. Yes, I definitely hadn’t wanted to know what he was thinking.
“I literally just told you I’m hating it.”
“No, you hate me. You can hate me and not hate this.”
“I hate this too.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.” It was partly true. I hated the way my body was craving his touch. And I hated the way I was apparently incapable of resisting him.
“Can I let you in on a little secret?” Parker continued.
“No.”
But he grinned and told me anyway. “I don’t hate this either.”
When he slightly shifted his hands once again, the heat trailing across my skin where he gripped me flared bolder and brighter.
His touch didn’t just spark, it ignited like a wildfire, burning hot and spreading quickly.
If he kept this up, I was going to do something stupid, and I knew the only thing that could douse the sensation was distance.
“I think I’m good now.” I quickly dropped my leg from his grasp and got to my feet. But before I could move toward the door, Parker reached out to stop me.
“We’re going to be late for school,” I told him.
“I think we have a much bigger problem than that.”
“I told you my leg’s good.”
“I’m not talking about your leg.”
“Then what are you talking about?”
“This.” He gestured at the space between us.
“What’s ‘this’?” I waved at the space too.
“Us.” He took a step nearer. “You’re telling me you don’t feel something when we’re this close?”
“Uh, I don’t know, disgust?”
“No.” He edged toward me again, making me back up.
“Anger, then.”
“You’re really saying that when I touched you just now, you didn’t feel sparks?” I backed up another step and bumped against the wall. Parker stopped mere inches away.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
It was another lie. Of course I’d felt sparks, and they only grew stronger when I realized he was feeling them too.
I couldn’t work out when the energy surging between us had suddenly changed from anger to attraction.
When the desire to pull him close had started to challenge the urge to push him away.
I could have kneed him in the balls and left three questions ago.
I should just move past him and storm from the room. And yet I didn’t do either.
“There’s a way to stop all this,” Parker said.
“And that is?”
He leaned his head down toward me. “We get it out of our system.”
My chest rose and fell with shallow breaths as I looked up into his impossibly blue eyes.
“My offer still stands,” he murmured.
His gaze fell to my lips and my heart pounded wildly in reply. He’d joked about us kissing again the night he climbed into my bedroom, and I’d quickly shrugged it off. But, right now, he looked serious, and I wasn’t finding it quite so easy to argue with him.
“That didn’t work out so well for either of us last time.”
“There’s no one here this time,” he replied. “Just you and me, and whatever this is between us.”
“There is nothing between us.” Yet my heart continued to beat hard against my chest like it was trying to cross the short distance that separated us.
“Prove it,” he dared. “Kiss me so we can go back to simply hating each other. Kiss me, so I can stop feeling this way whenever you walk into a room.”
One kiss.
It sounded so simple. So tempting. But what if that one kiss only proved there was something between us?
“You can’t deny this tension,” he continued. “And I don’t like it any more than you do. Don’t you want to get rid of it?”
I did. More than anything. But I held firm.
“You can’t get rid of something that’s not there.”
Finally, my body listened to me; I ducked past him and made for the door.
“I guess that means you’ll think about it,” he called after me.
Except as far as I was concerned, there was nothing to think about. Tension or not, kissing Parker Darling again was definitely not an option.