Chapter 21
twenty-one
. . .
Rachel
Iwas in my trance, the one I often fell into while on stage.
The dancing actually helped my mind. I forgot that I was stripping in front of hungry eyes.
I was dancing, moving my body to good music, and my confidence was always boosted when I was dancing.
If we could have afforded it, I would have gone on with a career in dance, but the lessons and the expensive costumes for competitions were too much for my single mom.
I told her I was tired of dancing, but the truth was I hated seeing her come home from one of her two jobs looking so tired and sad.
So, I left behind dancing, the one thing that made me incredibly happy and the one thing I thought could save me from a regular, dull life.
Instead, I got pregnant, and my dreams were put away in a diaper bag.
Now I was a stripper in a dingy, dark club, but at least I was dancing.
The tip jar looked stuffed as I swept up my discarded garments and walked off stage.
I headed straight to the dressing room. Jasmine kept a cooler filled with cold drinks.
I pulled out a bottle of water. I sat down at the vanity table to freshen up my lipstick before going out on the floor to serve.
Jasmine knocked on the door and came inside.
"He's here," she said in a cryptic tone.
"He is?" I spun around so fast, I knocked over the bottle of water. I grabbed it before it soaked everything on the table.
Jasmine looked confused by my response. "He said he'd been out of town on business."
I relaxed. "Oh, Evan. I was hoping we'd seen the last of him."
"Speak for yourself. He's a good tipper, and he just bought my most expensive bottle of scotch.
" Jasmine walked up to the vanity. She pulled the white dishcloth from her apron and wiped up the small puddle of water.
"Who did you think I meant? Judging by your reaction it must have been someone important. "
"Uh no, I mean, I figured it was Evan. Like I said, I was hoping not to see him again.
" I was lying, of course. I had no idea why I was so against Ronan seeing me at the club.
I'd kept my second job secret, and it was starting to irritate him.
I had no idea how he'd react, and the truth was I didn't want him telling me he disapproved.
I didn't want to have to break it off with him because he was angry about me stripping for a living.
And with my financial woes, this job was the best thing that'd ever happened to me.
"He'd like to see you," Jasmine said. "He didn't say anything about sitting with him, but he's in his usual spot in the back corner."
"His hiding spot, you mean. Such a hypocrite the way he comes in here and then hides so no one sees him. As if any of our regular clients have a clue who he is."
"Well, just thought I'd warn you that he was in the barroom. Great dance, by the way. You collected a lot of cash."
"That's good to hear."
Jasmine walked out, and I finished freshening up and hydrating.
I glanced at my phone and was relieved there were no worrisome texts from Mom.
My mind drifted back to the call I'd made to Ronan.
My face warmed with a blush just thinking about it.
I'd never done anything like that before.
There was something about Ronan. I just felt like myself.
I felt confident as if nothing could get in the way of my happiness.
I walked out. I glanced quickly in the direction of Evan's table. My hopes that he wouldn't see me were dashed when our gazes clashed and stuck. He was undeniably handsome and … persistent. I decided to let him know why it would never happen between us.
I walked over and pulled out a chair without being invited to sit. "I looked you up. Your marriage is complicated because you work for your father-in-law. You don't want to give up your nice position. I assume a divorce would definitely mean a pink slip."
Evan stared at me a moment longer. "You are especially gorgeous when you're being serious."
"Never mind." I moved to stand up.
"Wait. I'm sorry. I deserved that. You're right." He motioned for me to sit down, which I did reluctantly. "My job is very much attached to my marriage, but that's not what makes it complicated."
I lifted my brow in disbelief.
"All right. That's part of it. Linda and I grew apart long before I was promoted to VP.
By the way, I started in a bottom-feeder position and worked my way up.
Not just with nepotism but with hard work and dedication.
" He rested back. "I know that sounds stupid but it's true.
Linda and I live mostly separate lives."
"But your kids?" I asked.
"Linda has them in so many extracurricular activities like sports and choir and piano that I barely see them."
"They're your kids. You should make time to see them."
His mouth turned up in a faint smile. "Says the woman who works multiple jobs while her child is at home with a sitter."
"He's with my mom, and you know what? That's so different. I can barely make ends meet. You, on the other hand, probably spent more on that suit—very nice, by the way—than I've ever had in my bank account at one time."
Evan had a penetrating gaze. "Then let me help you."
"No, that's not why I sat down here. I just wanted to let you know that you should move on to your next—" I shook my head. "I don't even know what I'd call this, but I'm not your target audience."
Evan pulled something out of his pocket and slid it across the table. It was a black velvet box. "I was in Italy and saw this in a jeweler's window. I thought of you. Just to show you how serious I am."
I stared at the box. "I can't take a gift. We're not together."
"I'm still hoping that will change. Just one date. Give me a chance. I think this could be good for both of us. Open it." He added in a nice smile, which coaxed me to reach across and take hold of the box
I opened the lid. A sparkling emerald bracelet glittered up at me. Impressive green stones were hooked together with a delicate platinum chain. It was gorgeous, but it came with a very big price tag. I closed the box and slid it back to him. "It's beautiful. You should give it to your wife."
Evan flinched at that suggestion. "We don't exchange gifts anymore or anything else other than the occasional scowl." He picked up his glass of scotch and gulped it as if just talking about his marriage was enough to send him to a bottle.
"I get why you stick it out. Although it's a very shallow reason. But why doesn't she kick you out if the marriage is so hopeless?"
"Pride, social status, saving face with her friends.
A broken marriage is frowned upon in her social circle.
Some of her friends don't even live in the same house as their husbands, but divorce is messy and expensive.
It's easier to just pretend. That's what Linda and I are doing.
She might even have someone on the side, and I don't give a fuck. "
I reached over, picked up the bottle of scotch, poured it in his glass and took a drink.
He watched me as I licked the expensive liquor off my lips.
His gaze was seductive, but it didn't stir nearly the same heat and emotion as Ronan's.
Ronan could just glance my direction, and my face would warm with a blush.
"I'm seeing someone," I said. "Someone I care about."
Evan looked hurt. "If he can do the same for you, if he can help you through tough times and give you a home and ease your financial burden, if he can make your life easier, then I'll bow out.
I'll admit defeat and walk away." He knew he'd found my Achille's heel.
My expression no doubt told the whole story.
Ronan had stolen my heart, but I was a mom.
I needed to think first and foremost about Jack and Mom.
Ronan could not help me out of my financial problems, and they were huge. Recently, they'd become insurmountable.
"Just because he doesn't have money to buy me expensive bracelets …" I started but didn't know how to finish the sentence. I took another drink.
"Do you love him?" Evan asked. His jaw flinched a bit as if he was sorry he'd asked it based on my expression.
"I think so. It's been a while for me, so I'm still new to the falling in love thing. But yeah, I think I do. I've got to get to work."
Evan pushed the bracelet box my direction. "I have no use for it. There's no one else I'd give it to."
My mind went straight to the possibility of pawning it. I was in no position to turn down an expensive gift that might help my bank account. I reached for the box, and Evan took gentle hold of my wrist. "Just one date. Tomorrow's Sunday."
"I promised my son I'd take him to the park."
"Which park?"
I stared down at him. "I suppose persistence helped you get where you are in the business world."
His mouth turned up on the corner. "It definitely helped. We can sit on the park bench, watch him play and we'll talk. That's all."
"We'll be at Lion's Park at noon. There's a playground in the far corner." I dropped the bracelet box into my pocket. I didn't thank him. I just nodded and walked away.