Chapter 7
Chapter Seven
DREW
She was going to be a mother. I’d finally given her something good and pure. Something untainted by my world that could be raised in any world she deemed fit.
Ayda was going to be a mother.
I was going to be a dad.
The minute her words fell against my lips, I reached up and gripped her hair tightly, holding her mouth to mine and sealing our moment with a kiss so true and heartfelt, it made my skin prickle.
Her tears were against my cheeks, and I released her slowly, pulling back to take a look at her beautiful face.
A tear I could no longer hold back fell and rolled over my rough cheek while I stared into her pretty blue eyes.
“We’re having a baby,” I croaked.
“We’re going to be parents.” She sounded stunned. Her hands landed on my shoulders, and a radiant smile blossomed over her face. “We made a life.”
“I’m ready,” I said, without any hesitation or reservations.
I was ready. I was ready to have something I could call my own, something I could nurture and protect in a way that didn’t require me going to war.
Now I would have something that would ground me and remind me that life deserved more than fighting.
It deserved peace, and it deserved respect. “I’m ready to do this with you.”
“I can’t imagine ever doing this with anyone else. I didn’t know I wanted this but now...” She gave me another broad grin. “I can’t imagine not wanting it.”
I released a small huff of laughter and shifted, pushing up until I was standing over her and brushing her hair away from her face. Even beat up and bruised, she was perfect to me, but the wounds of that battle would be the last she’d ever have on her skin.
On my life, they would be the last.
Pulling her to stand with me, I wrapped my arms around her and rested my chin on her shoulder, just needing to hold her tight.
She felt tiny in my arms, but the responsibility I felt holding her, and now my child, made my heart want to break free from its chest and shout to the world how fucking happy it was.
I’d never felt anything like this before.
Not with this much power.
“Just promise me one thing,” I breathed over her shoulder, emotion closing my throat up tightly.
“Anything,” she whispered.
“Promise me this is my baby and not Harry’s. I know how close you two were.”
Ayda’s laugh came as a sputter before her forehead landed on my shoulder, and she unraveled. Her laughter had her shaking in my arms, and took a while to die down, her words coming as a guffaw. “I promise.”
I laughed, too, because I had no fucking idea what else to do. The tension was cut right on time, stopping me from choking on my own heart and falling to the floor. I’d never felt such a twisted combination of weak and empowered all at once.
Without another thought, I picked her up, wrapping my arms around her and spinning her around in a circle as carefully as I could. My head fell back, and I looked up at the ceiling, my happiness pouring out of me before I pressed a hard kiss to her head.
“Thank you,” I told her sincerely. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”
“You’re half responsible for this. I should be the one thanking you.”
Planting her back on her feet, I held her and looked down into my favorite blue eyes. “You’re welcome. Now tell me that you’re okay. Tell me what we do next.” I inhaled slowly. “Tell me where we go from here because I don’t have a clue, Ayda.”
“I’m perfect.” Her voice was wistful but honest. She meant it.
“As for the rest, I’m as clueless as you are.
What I do know is that I need to see a doctor at some point.
We probably need to talk about how we deal with this when it comes to our current situation, but aside from that, I was hoping you had all the answers. You normally do.” She winked playfully.
I brought my hands around to her flat stomach, resting the heels of my palms together and creating a cradle for my child growing in there. The thought and idea of it was unimaginable. A miracle brought to the hands of a man who had done so much harm and brought so much pain to the world.
Maybe second chances were real after all.
“First thing I’m going to do is get you a doctor,” I told her.
“Doc can be here in no time, and we’ll get you checked over.
I need to know everything’s okay right now.
Once I know you’re good, I’m going to figure out a way to get shit out there sorted, get the men out of this mess we’re in again, and make sure the life we’re bringing this child into is one we’re proud to call our own.
And then do you know what I’m going to do, Ayda? ”
“I have no earthly idea.”
“I’m going to marry your ass.”
“About damn time.”
By the time the afternoon rolled around, Doc had been over to The Hut without raising any suspicion among the guys. Ayda had been hurt by Owen Sinclair, and as far as my men knew, I was simply being my usual, overprotective self.
Doc told Ayda he wanted to return during the week, and there was talk of blood tests, scans, appointments she’d have to make, and so much more I didn’t understand. All I could do was sit in the corner with my hands clasped together as I leaned forward and watched every move he made on my girl.
She kept asking him over and over if the baby was okay, or was she in danger of losing him or her due to her injuries, but Doc didn’t have any clear answers.
She was too early into her pregnancy for him to have any, so, for now, it was a waiting game with no assurances to keep our minds from tripping up over all the things that could go wrong.
Once Doc left, I drew Ayda a bath and watched as she sank into the bubbles and tipped her head back against the tub. With a kiss to her temple, I told her I’d give her some time and be back soon.
While the two of us were lost in the clouds of what our future could now hold, my men were out there wondering where the hell I was, and why I wasn’t storming down to the station to rescue Jedd.
“Any news?” I asked Kenny as I walked over to the bar.
He was sitting on a stool while Deeks stood behind the bar, leaning against the wall with his head down and his hands sunk into his pockets.
“Nothing.” Kenny shook his head.
I dropped my ass onto the stool next to Kenny and leaned against the counter. “Sutton hasn’t called?”
“Not since earlier.”
“No Eric?”
“No.”
“Rubin?”
Kenny sighed, taking a moment’s pause. “No.”
“Great,” I sighed. When I glanced up at Deeks, I saw defeat and concern marring all his features. “You doing okay, brother?”
Deeks looked at me with a small shrug of his shoulders. “How we going to get out of this, Drew? I can’t see no way. I can’t see the plan no matter where my mind goes.”
“We’ll find a way, Deeks. We always do,” I assured him.
“Not without one of The Hounds taking the fall for it, we don’t. You, Pete, Harry, now—” Kenny reminded me, but I cut him off quick.
“No more sacrifices. I promise.”
“How can you promise that?”
Staring into Kenny’s eyes, I began to see for the very first time how young and vulnerable he could look at times.
Sure, he was one of my most trusted men, despite our differences in the past. If there were a fight, Kenny would be standing beside me with his fists tight and his gun ready.
He’d die for me—for any of us, and that meant something.
It meant everything. But, fuck, he was young and so was I, and was this the life men like us should really be fucking living?
Dodging bullets, flexing biceps, growling loud, howling at the moon, too scared to talk about repercussions and sacrifices in case it was our hearts that stopped beating next.
He was looking at me to be the president of the club. I needed to be that now while I was still capable because once that baby of ours came along, shit was going to change.
It had to.
Pressing a hand on Kenny’s shoulder, I leaned forward and squeezed him hard. “Because I have a feeling it’s our time now, brother. The gods haven’t always played in our favor, and we’ve handled that. Maybe it’s time for us to have a little faith. A little hope.”
Kenny’s forced scowl didn’t match the sparkle in his eyes.
He wanted to believe in the words I’d spoken, but the bruises of his memory hurt to touch when he thought back over the last few months and years of our lives.
It was easier for us to be skeptical than to accept that good shit could happen to us as much as anyone else.
I’m going to be a father, I wanted to tell him… but I didn’t because now wasn’t the time to share that news. For now, it would stay between Ayda and me. A secret only we knew. A truth in our world we could treasure just a little longer.
“Trust me, Kenny. It’s our time.”