Chapter 35
When Abigail leaves, I feel the loss penetrating my bones. I know her well enough. She’ll probably do what she does, trying to protect me by staying away.
That is not going to work.
I’m not letting her do that again. If I knew, I would have put a stop to it from the very start. I get the Family is fucking dangerous. I’m lying in a hospital bed. I could have died, but I am harder to kill than that, asshole.
My mom fusses around me while my father talks with the crew chief. Neither of them understanding how this could have happened.
I’m not saying who was responsible. I’m going to take care of that personally.
“Your job is to protect him when he’s in that car,” my father says through a clenched jaw.
The analysis came back, and there was a leak. That fucking asshole Felix has professionals doing his bidding.
“Why do I have to stay here?” I whine, and my mom takes my hand in hers.
“Dane, please.”
Why do a mother’s pleas work on you as if they hypnotize you into doing what they ask?
“Just tonight.”
She sighs but nods, sitting in the chair beside my bed.
“Abigail looked so scared. She reminded me of me.”
“Mom, she’s it for me.”
“It’s the hardest for the people who love race car drivers. The fear, love, and pride—that’s a potent mix.”
“She can handle it. She’s strong.”
“She’s with you, isn’t she?”
That she is, and that is the biggest accomplishment of my life.
I ask for my phone, and I type.
If you don’t get your ass here ASAP, I’m coming to you.
I just left.
And I want you to come back.
The dots appear only to disappear, but she’ll return. I was so damn blind not to believe in her love, but I do now, and I will fight for her. I will fight for us like it’s the ultimate race, and I’m going to win that checkered flag.
After my mother asks the doctor twice if I’m fine, she finally breathes a sigh of relief.
Dealing with things like fire is part of the learning curriculum of any race car driver, and my race suit is fire resistant. Still, you have seconds to get out, and staying calm and getting out quickly is imperative.
“Until tomorrow, son. Rest,” my father says.
“Just tonight.”
“Stubborn.”
“You know this is nothing.”
Alone, the quietness envelops me, the room caging me in. I shoot upright and hop off the bed, dragging my IV with me as I pace around, not liking being confined to a hospital bed.
The door opens, and when I turn, Abigail is there, peeking in from the crack before she comes inside.
She crosses her arms over her chest. “Get in bed. Now.”
One second, her eyes flicker with worry; the next, a cry escapes her as she clutches her chest. Seeing her like this punches me straight in my gut, cutting my air.
I rush to her and take her in my arms, trying to soothe her anguish.
“Look at me, pinch me, whatever you need to assure yourself that I’m good, sweetheart.”
Guilt stretches in her eyes. “This is my fault.”
I palm her face and place a kiss on her forehead, the tip of her nose, and her lips.
“Princess, understand one very important thing: nothing and no one could keep me from you.”
“What if I want you to stay away, then?”
My finger trails down her neck and arm until I interlink our fingers.
“I can’t do that. Don’t make me break a promise to you.”
“Nothing has changed for me, Dane. I’m just angrier and want to hurt Felix even worse for everything. But I can’t focus on things I need to do if you’re in Greenville. Leave, and I promise I will let you know when things settle.”
“Won’t you wonder what it would have been like if we fought through this together?”
I need her to fight for me, for us. We need to trust that together, we can overcome everything.
Believe in us like I do.
Her chin quivers.
“I love you, princess.” I offer her a small smile. “I’d wait for you for an eternity and longer. I would do the unimaginable for you. If you’d want me now or ten years from now, I’d come back to you without a second thought. That’s the guy I am when it comes to you. All I would care about would be to come back home to you.”
Her eyes well up. “I want to be with you more than anything else.”
The words reverberate in my mind and I cock my head. “Because you love me?”
“Really? Are you asking me that for real?”
“Maybe I just love to hear it from you again and again. I’d proclaim my love for you on national television, tattoo it all over my damn skin.”
“Never doubt my love, Dane. But you need to think about your family, about your career.”
“And leave you with that psychopath?”
“So not even those two things can change your mind. Fine, I’ll be yours if you do this my way.”
“Tempting… if you weren’t already.”
“Promise me you’ll leave the second you get discharged. If you don’t, there is no coming back.”
I push her against the wall, having had enough of her stubbornness ruining perfect moments between us. I slam my lips against hers, and she feeds me her moans. Intertwining our fingers, I lift them above her head, pinning her on the wall behind her.
“You are mine, Abigail. I’m so fucking done letting you lead our relationship. That ends right now.”
“There won’t be a relationship if he kills you. Will you still love me if something happens to your family? I refuse to be that selfish.”
Anger courses through me because she has a point.
Do you fight for the woman you love, knowing what you could lose?
I do.
Kissing me one more time, she slips out the door, giving me time to think.
I don’t need any damn thinking time.
***
The next morning, I’m in a sour mood when my parents visit, but that vanishes when I see my little sister. A smile parts my lips at her animated chatter and bubbly face. She’s a sweet bundle of energy.
After the doctor discharges me, I hop into my father’s car.
Resting my cheek against the window, I think of Abigail, needing to see her.
When he parks in front of a coffee shop, Mom says, “I’ll be right back.”
Her eyes sparkle when she returns with a cup of coffee.
“You can only imagine how much I have loved both of you because I gave up this happy-maker for nine months straight. Twice.”
“Seriously, Mom.”
She takes a sip, closes her eyes, and says, “I had an interesting conversation with Abigail.”
I’m going to wring her neck. The lengths she would go to keep me out is almost impressive.
“And?”
I scratch my neck, and she says, “You had to fall for someone in her position?”
“Mom, I fell for her.”
“She’s afraid for you, and imagine my shock when she said it’s her fault and I should hate her and take you away.”
“It’s not her fault.”
“Of course it’s not, but does knowing that make it any easier? When you have children, you’ll realize their well-being is above everything else.”
“Mom, I don’t know what to do, but I refuse to live without her.”
“Maybe just not give up.” My head snaps to her, and she smiles. “This is your hurdle as a couple.”
Thanks to her, my mom knows way more than she should.
“Don’t look at me like that. But I would also say, take a step back and think about everything. Surprise your brain for once with patience.”
I burst into laughter. “You’re the best, Mom. But we both know my brain has no clue what patience is.”
When we reach the house, I head straight to the shower. Letting the hot water unknot my muscles, I’m going over my talks with Abigail and my mother when my phone rings. Drying myself quickly, I answer Blake.
“What’s up?”
“Come and see for yourself.”
Changing quickly, I grab the keys from my nightstand and drive to their house now fully renovated after the fire. Not my finest moment, but I can’t change the past. I let myself in and come to a complete stop in the hallway.
In the living room, Abigail holds a bottle of tequila in one hand, and in the other, she balances a lemon slice and salt.
Mia tries to grab the bottle, but Abigail lifts it to her mouth. “You’ll need it too. Trust me. Why do we go for the brooding, asshole-ish type? I mean, what? Do we women come into the world with two pre-established instincts? We’ll save the children, and we’ll end up falling for the daredevil, growly bad boys?”
I purse my lips. She’s wasted. I lean against the doorframe while she goes on.
“I was going through my bleak existence. I was fine. I mean, as okay as you could be in our position, right? And then he, we shall not name him—”
What the fuck?
“—pops in and stares at me with those bottomless dark brown eyes of his. My first thought was, I want them on me, just on me. And bam, I was suddenly not content anymore because he showed me how it could be. We’ll call the ‘he who shall not be named’ Dane.”
Bailey and Mia urge her to shut up while the guys grab a shot and lift it in my direction.
“Barges right into my life without a knock or an invitation. Wait, he’s not a vampire. Whatever, he totally could be because he sucks me… the life out of me. Yeah, I already miss him. But I could not live if he wouldn’t be alive, so I’d rather stay away and love him from afar.”
“You could find someone else.”
I’m going to smash Hunter’s head into the wall.
“Doesn’t surprise me at all,” Bailey mumbles.
“There’s no one I want. And guys, this is about me.”
Blake waves a hand in her direction. “Of course, we thought you were done. Continue with your pity party.”
“No, I mean, he’s my Celine.”
What the fuck?
“He’s my happily ever after. My soulmate, my person. What if one day he realizes I’m not worth the trouble? There are women out there with whom he’d have it easier with than me.”
“He might,” Hunter, in his eternal wisdom, says, which gets Bailey to shake her head at him, not so subtly.
“First, you’d never let that happen. Second, Dane would never do that,” Blake says. I like this guy.
“I know. I love him so much…”
“Then stop, Abi. Is that what those romances tell you, that the guy who loves you would tire of you? I thought it was all the mad love, rainbow shit, and happy endings,” Blake says.
“Who asked for your opinion, anyway? You think with a bottle in your hand.” Mia retorts, sending him an angry look.
He pins her with a glare while Abigail says, “I’m driving to him.” She takes another shot. “I’ll need that. It’s his eyes. They’re my kryptonite, and fuck, I’m scared and confused and horny. Have I told you how much I love him?”
“You did,” the group says, groaning.
“You’re so going to regret this tomorrow.”
“I love you too, Blake, but I’m so done with you hiding things. I can almost understand Dane.”
“You love him, so I don’t grasp the issue here. I was about to murder that guy for hurting you,” Hunter says.
“Love? That’s not even a small part of what I feel for him.”
I feel the same, princess.
“Look who’s behaving as if he’s actually interested in someone other than himself,” Bailey says.
“Jealous, kitten?” Hunter retorts.
“Stop calling me that,” she huffs in frustration.
He smirks, raising a brow in challenge. “Kitten.”
She takes the bottle from Abigail while my girl mumbles that it was hers—my spoiled princess I love with every furious beat of my heart.
Abigail looks at Bailey and says, “If he knew… Why won’t you?”
Bailey quickly cuts her off, her voice ringing of panic. “Abi, you’ve had enough.”
“See you later.”
“You’re not going anywhere,” Blake insists.
“I so am.”
I grip her elbow and turn her to me. She gasps and puts her hands on my face.
“Did I conjure you?”
“Let’s get your drunk ass upstairs.”
“I want more tequila.”
“You’re not getting more.”
“So bossy. I wanted to come to you and say that I don’t know anything anymore except that I love you.”
I gather her in my arms, jerking my chin to thank Blake.
“You called him?” Mia asks him.
“If she was my girl, I’d want to hear what goes on in her mind when there are no inhibitions.”
While Blake and Mia eye-fuck each other, I take the stairs with Abigail, resting her cheek on my chest.
I place her gently on her bed.
She whines. “But I want to party.”
“You were the only one partying.”
She scrunches her nose up at me, being so damn adorable.
“I would miss you terribly.”
Drunk Abigail is not only talkative but open. We’ll have to work on that when she’s sober as well. I’ll never break her trust. She’ll be safe with me forever, but I know I have to be patient with her. For her I will be whatever she needs me to be. All that matters is that I have her.
I take my shirt off and climb into bed next to her.
“I told your mom. I couldn’t live knowing something happened to you because of me.”
“That’s my problem, not yours.”
“We’re just awful at this whole relationship thing.” She pouts, looking so damn cute.
“Oh, so we’re starting to put labels on things.”
“I know you want that. I actually like labels, but don’t tell anyone.”
I cross my heart, biting down my amusement.
Rolling herself on her stomach, she puffs some strands of her hair from her face before she inches to me as if telling me a secret. “I imagine things.”
“Things like what?”
“Like you and me and us… you know, being together, like officially together, building a family, growing old…” She puts her hand on her mouth. “Me in white? That’s crazy, right?”
“No, it’s not.”
Tequila, I will fucking raise a statue in your honor.
“I want you.”
She climbs right on me and peels my jeans off me.
“Princess, are you sure?”
“I want you all the time. Don’t you know that?”
I cup her cheek, caressing her soft skin. “Me too. I’m not running from you, but to us.”
“I love you, Dane, so much, my heart aches. This is how much I love you.”
She’s too drunk . Instead, I kiss her all over from her belly up to her mouth and then I pull her to my side, holding her. She snuggles into me, and I fall asleep with a huge grin.