Chapter 36
The sun’s rays poke at my eyelids, and I open my eyes, only to squeeze them shut immediately. My head pounds like crazy, a headache throbbing behind my temples.
As I wake up, Dane’s body heat licks at my skin. His arms and legs are draped around me, holding me close.
This guy is my ruin and salvation, wrapped in cotton and dreams.
He blinks awake, smiling so brightly it melts me. “How are you feeling?”
I rummage my brain, but it’s a jumbled mess. “Headache,” I croak.
He gets out of bed and returns with an aspirin and a glass of water from the bathroom.
I take it, gulping down the water that soothes my sore throat. “Thank you.”
He leans in to kiss me. “Abigail, we’ll figure it out together.” His sentence ends with a statement that warms my heart.
I nod, asking, “What happened last night? Did we …?”
He shakes his head. “You were drunk, even though, sweetheart, you climbed me like a tree, but I want you to be fully there when I take you.”
He’s perfection in human form. The best man out there. And I am the lucky one to call him mine.
My stomach rumbles, and he kisses my belly, which makes me all emotional.
“Let’s go put some food in your belly, princess.”
With our house now fully renovated and looking the same as before the fire, we moved back in on Friday. As per Kaden’s instructions, we had two more additions, Mia and Hunter.
In the kitchen, Bailey, Mia, Blake, and Hunter are seated around the table. Blake puts a plate of pancakes before me and asks, “How are we feeling?”
“Horrible. What did I drink?”
He chuckles. “Tequila. Like a champ.”
“And you didn’t stop me?”
“We tried,” says Bailey, who glares at Hunter for stealing a piece of her breakfast.
These two will crash and badly.
While I caress my temples, Dane feeds me bites of pancake, turning my insides into mush. I have eyes only for him, everything else slipping into the background.
When we finish breakfast, we move to the living room. I slump on the couch, and Dane bends down in front of me.
He kisses me on the forehead and says, “I’m going to go talk with my team.”
I offer a small nod, already missing him.
It doesn’t take long for the door to open, and Kaden comes inside, holding himself taller like the weight has finally lifted.
“What the fuck happened?” he asks.
I hold my head between my hands, a groan tumbling from my throat. “Long night.”
Not even a few moments later, Celine walks in, eyes sparkling and face radiating.
“Wow, such a coincidence.” Blake chuckles.
Celine rolls her eyes at him. “Whatever, smartass.”
Both she and Kaden disappear upstairs.
Hunter says, “Wanna bet they’re going to pretend they weren’t together?”
We all look at each other knowingly. Those two couldn’t pretend to save their lives. Love makes you reckless.
“They’re being cautious,” Bailey says.
I need to talk to my best friend. Standing up, I go upstairs, but I see him heading into Celine’s room. I give them a few moments before I call his name.
“Kaden.”
When he comes out, he follows me to my room. I look outside the window, thinking of Dane and all that happened in the last few days. An avalanche of emotions buries me.
“Dane was in the hospital. His car caught fire while he was training… That was not an accident. I tell him the truth, and a few days later, he lands in the hospital.”
My body shakes, and tears line my lids.
“Is he okay?”
“He’s out, but still… How am I going to sit across from Grandmother and not want to stab her with the fork? How can we just pretend? I… I want to fucking kill Felix.” A wave of fury washes over me.
“I just want this all to end.”
“It will, it fucking will.”
“I don’t want to be alone.”
“Guys,” he yells, and a few moments later, everyone comes into my room, making me feel loved. My friends climb into bed with me, hugging me until I fall asleep.
I feel better once I wake up.
Kaden peers inside my room. “Are you okay?”
I nod and see his features taut with stress. He needs me too.
“It’s me. So start talking.”
“I love her.”
“I know that.”
“I want this over, so I can act on it…”
I scoot up in bed and pat the spot next to me. He sits down, his head hanging, and I place my hand on his. “It takes time, but, Kaden, she loves you too, and you two will be okay.”
“I thought we were being smooth.”
I pin him with a look. “Please. You can’t fool anyone.”
“So, what happened?”
“I throw Dane out the door. He comes through the window.” Smiling, I add, “I fell in love with a crazy person.”
We both chuckle.
“And I finally stopped pushing him away.”
“That’s good. Together is always better. We need the strength our partners give us.”
He goes to his room, but not seconds later, I hear him tiptoeing to hers.
You’re never more vulnerable, and you’re never more in your own world than when you’re in love. Everything else disappears and becomes inconsequential because you just want to live in the moment. It’s no wonder my secret got out.
Love hates secrecy; it wants to be out in the open.
***
The following day, I’m in the kitchen when Celine finds me.
“I’m sorry, Abi,” she says, rocking on her feet.
I nod, and I hand her a cup of coffee. “I would have done worse.”
“That almost-kiss with Dane… I just wanted to provoke Kaden.”
“I can relate. And it worked.”
She takes a sip and says, “You and Dane, huh?”
“Me and Dane.”
“I’ve been jealous of you.”
“Of me? I would have taken your place and threw a damn parade too, for being an ocean away from this shithole.”
I offer her a small smile and continue, “I’m sorry too, Celine. I love you and I never intended to hurt you. But thinking Kaden and I could do that to you… I guess when you’re miserable, it’s easier to be petty too.”
We hug for a long time, and then I drive to Dane’s house.
When I find no one there, I drive toward the track. The security lets me in, and I park next to his car.
Out of all of us, he has his path carved in front of him, a successful career he would have to quit so he can be with me—if our plan of disappearing works.
Dane speeds around on the track, leaving a whooshing sound behind. He completes one lap after another, smoothly passing every curve. He is so in control, owning the track. I’m mesmerized.
When Jasmine sees me, she squeals. Rushing to me, she jumps into my arms.
“He’s the best, isn’t he? I’m going to be just like him.”
With my eyes downcast, I approach his parents. When I lift my gaze, his mom takes me in her arms. “I’m so deeply sorry. You should hate me. I can leave if you’re not okay with me being here…”
“For loving my son? What kind of mother would I be? You’re his peace, his person. And I can sleep in peace at night.”
“But I…”
Elena hugs me tighter, and I lean into her warm embrace. She might think I’m never going to end the hug, but it’s all I need right now.
“Why don’t you stay with us?”
“Sure?”
“Yes, pretty please,” Jasmine says, and I watch him on the track for the entirety of his training.
When Dane parks at the pit stop, he leans on the hood, eating a protein bar while his family and I approach. He chokes on a small piece and beats his chest when he sees me.
He throws the package away and sprints to me. Lifting me from the ground, he twirls me around. Moments like these make it hard to contain my happiness.
“This made my fucking day.”
“I blame my coming here on you.”
“What did I do now?”
“You’re you.”
It’s this profound love for him that makes me mad at him. He should definitely be invested in working on his safety, as I do for him, but would I be happier in the end if he leaves? No.
I know this is not what he wants to hear, but I’m done telling half-truths.
“We need to talk.”
He sets me down and takes my hand. He says goodbye to his parents, and I wave to them.
In his car, he says, “I saw you there.”
“No wonder Parker kept looking at me. He must’ve thought that I was distracting you.”
“I just beat my record twice. I think he might glue you to the damn spot from now on.”
I giggle, liking the thought a bit too much. We go to a drive-thru, then eat the burgers and fries perched on the hood of his car.
“You would lose all that, you know.”
“I know.”
“Are you sure I’m worth it?”
“You’re worth every-fucking-thing.”
I chew on a french fry and say, “You’re impulsive and reckless.”
“You’re stubborn and meticulous.”
“Why do you want this?”
“Because you’re the other end of my balance.”
This guy and his words.
“We don’t even know what will happen…”
“I don’t care.”
I look at the clear sky above as if there’s a hidden answer.
He steps between my legs, cupping my face. “I want to spend the rest of my life with you, but if we just have days, then I’ll take those too. If we live a long or short life, it doesn’t matter because if yours ends, mine will end. But while we live, let me love you. I promise you myself. All of me. My love for you is unconditional and endless. I’m ready and willing to sacrifice everything. I’d do whatever it takes to be there along with the good and the bad on our journey. As long as we’re together, I don’t care about anything else.”