Chapter 13
Nicolas
The city rolled by outside the window. Nicolas counted the passing street lights for want of something to do, trying to tune out the conversation of the others in the car.
He’d rather be anywhere else than headed out on a patrol with his new squad.
Personally, he didn’t think it was wise for Sloan to send anyone out on patrol while they still thought the sin eater was active, but maybe that was part of the test. Maybe they thought Ashmedai would show up again if they sent Nicolas back out into the field.
Maybe they were hoping it would attack again because of Nicolas’s presence.
If what Danny said was true, Ashmedai wouldn’t show, and that would be the first step toward convincing Sloan that Ashmedai was gone.
“Can’t believe Commander Sloan actually let us go out tonight,” Ashton said from the passenger seat. “I thought for sure he’d call off all the patrols because of the deaths.”
“We won’t stop patrolling because of one demon,” James said confidently from the driver’s seat. “The world needs our protection.”
Nicolas bit his tongue. The world was still protected even if they didn’t patrol. The Sentinels were probably doing a far better job, with their connections to the demon world, than the paladins could even imagine. But he wasn’t dumb enough to say as much aloud.
“I hope we see some action tonight,” Kyle added, on Nicolas’s right. “This demon’s had us on our back foot for too long.”
“God willing,” James agreed.
The SUV came to a stop behind a shopping center that was closed for the night.
The city was alive around them, the rush of cars on the highway nearby and occasional honking horns or blaring sirens reminding them that the world continued to turn beyond their little pocket of darkness.
Nicolas wordlessly followed the others from the car and grabbed his sword and knives from the trunk.
“Commander Sloan and I discussed how to handle the patrol tonight,” James said when they were all ready.
“At first, we thought it might be best for the squad to stick together as a whole. There’s strength in numbers, supposedly, but we know this demon can handle groups with ease.
Because of that, I thought it was best to split up, make us harder to track down.
We’ll separate and meet back here in an hour.
Take your time. Stay in contact via the radios.
If you see anything suspicious, call it in immediately, and we’ll all come running.
But we don’t want to stay bunched together and make it too easy for this beast to find us. ”
Murmurs of agreement moved through the squad, and Nicolas jerked his head in a belated nod.
“All right, you know what to do, then. Move out.”
The squad split up. Everyone went in different directions.
Nicolas was used to partnering up with someone, so stepping away from the cars completely on his own felt foreign.
Everyone else went down side streets and quickly disappeared from sight, leaving Nicolas to wander down the back side of the shopping center alone.
He kept one hand on the hilt of a knife at his hip, unwilling to draw it yet.
There was always a chance he would come across a human on the streets of LA.
It had happened before, and seeing someone emerge from the darkness holding a knife or a sword always scared the shit out of them—totally reasonably.
He liked to avoid giving the civilians heart attacks where possible.
It was bad enough when people saw them wearing the blades.
Back when he was still captain of his own squad, he occasionally had them patrol without the swords entirely, if they were too close to a populated area.
But here, the only signs of life were in the distant noises of the city. He checked over his shoulder every now and then. The SUVs shrank into the distance as he walked, and his footsteps seemed loud, grit crunching underfoot on the pavement. He turned down the first alley he came across.
Halfway down the alley, a door hung open. Nicolas stopped in front of it, frowning. He couldn’t tell what type of business it was, but the interior was pitch black. The door definitely shouldn’t be standing wide open at this hour. There was no one around.
And then two orange eyes appeared in the darkness within.
Nicolas’s heart lurched. He took a step closer without thinking.
“Ash?”
The eyes blinked at him, waiting.
He couldn’t walk away, not if Ashmedai was right here. His body moved without conscious thought, like Ashmedai had his own gravitational pull. He barely had the sense of mind to shut the door behind him to make sure no one else could stumble upon them.
“Ash,” he sobbed, stumbling straight into the demon’s arms.
A low, satisfied growl filled his ear as he gripped Ashmedai’s supple cloak in both hands, going up on his tiptoes to properly bury his face in Ashmedai’s neck.
He inhaled that familiar, cool scent, shuddering with relief when Ashmedai’s arms tightened around him, lining their bodies up from hip to shoulder.
God, he’d missed him so much. How was that possible? They barely knew each other. It was like he’d been walking around with a thorn under his skin, and he’d finally pulled it out. Tension bled from his limbs, and he could finally breathe without aching.
“I’m sorry,” Nicolas breathed, pressing his lips to Ashmedai’s neck just to feel the warmth of his skin as he spoke. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have sent you away. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“Nic-las,” Ashmedai rasped. “It’s okay. I understand now.”
That was good, because Nicolas didn’t understand a damn thing.
His whole world was unraveling around him, and this was the only thing that made sense anymore.
He didn’t know why, and he couldn’t possibly put it into words, but somehow being in Ashmedai’s arms was the only time he didn’t feel like he was lost at sea.
A demon made him feel safe. It shouldn’t be possible, but he was tired of fighting it.
Long fingers sifted through his hair, cradling him. “You are good,” Ashmedai went on. “You do good things.” He turned his head, pressing his cheek to Nicolas’s. “It’s dumb.”
Nicolas snorted out a surprised laugh.
“But it’s… who you are. That’s okay.”
Nicolas’s stomach jolted. Ashmedai was speaking in full sentences now. Nicolas had missed that transition, and he hated himself for it. Did someone else help him learn to bridge the gap in his language, or did he learn it on his own? Nicolas should have been there.
“Are you saying it’s okay for me to be a good person?”
Ashmedai heaved a beleaguered sigh. “I guess.”
Nicolas shook with laughter, muffling it against Ashmedai’s skin. “Thanks. So you don’t get why I want to help, but you won’t fight me on it? Is that what you’re saying?”
“Yes. Am saying it’s dumb… but I support it.”
He was so happy he could cry. He would cry, if he let himself marinate in it for much longer. So instead, he focused on all the uncertainty lurking within him, erecting it like a shield around his most vulnerable pieces.
“Why did it feel so bad to be away from you?” he asked. “I’ve been dreaming about you. Every single night. Like my mind couldn’t accept that you weren’t around.”
“Don’t know. Don’t sleep. Wish I’d been able to dream of you.” He moved his head back and forth, rubbing their cheeks together.
Nicolas smiled at the sensation of skin on skin.
“Maybe there’s some truth to what the others said, about us being made for each other.
” The thought still made his stomach clench, but it wasn’t just anxiety anymore.
Something fragile had taken root within him, the moment he laid eyes on Ashmedai again.
He couldn’t stand the idea of being apart from him again. It was torture.
Ashmedai stilled. “You think so?”
Nicolas slowly raised his head, meeting those glowing eyes. They were all he could see in the absolute darkness around them. “Yeah. I don’t know how else to explain it. It was like I was going through some kind of withdrawal.”
Ashmedai leaned in, pressing their foreheads together. “Yes. Awful.”
“Yeah,” Nicolas breathed. His eyes filled, but he blinked the wetness away. Now wasn’t the time to fall apart. “I don’t want to do it anymore. Will you… Will you go to my place? Be there when I get home?”
Claws tickled Nicolas’s cheek. “Yes. But…”
“But what?” Please don’t say no, he wanted to say. Please don’t leave me alone again.
“Stay with you until you go back to HQ.”
Nicolas’s brow furrowed. “What? How? You can’t be seen, remember? It’s too—”
“No, I know. I’ll hide. In the shadows. They won’t see me. Neither will you. But… I’ll watch over you. Keep you safe while you hunt. Then I’ll meet you at home.”
At home. Nicolas’s stomach fluttered. “Okay.”
Those claws trailed gentle lines down the side of his face and back up. “No demons will bother you tonight. I promise.”
Nicolas’s lips parted. “You can make that happen?”
Ashmedai growled, low and dangerous. “Yes. You’re mine. I’ll make sure they all know it. They fear me. They should.”
Nicolas shivered. How the hell was that so hot?
It was getting really hard not to lean in and seal their mouths together, so he forced himself to say, “I should go.”
“If you must.”
A laugh startled out of Nicolas. “You’ll be there when I get home?”
“Yes. Stay safe, Nic-las.”
“I will.” He backed away, unable to tear his eyes from Ashmedai’s. He fumbled for the doorknob behind him, tearing his eyes away only when the door came between them.
With a sigh, he glanced around, making sure he was alone. Sloppy. He should’ve done that before stepping outside, but luck was on his side this time. The alley was deserted, so no one saw him slip away from the door.