Chapter 45
Zayden
“That’s all for today.” Coach blows his whistle and ends practice twenty minutes early. This never happens.
A few of the guys glance around, confused, but they don’t push it. Most of them are too exhausted to care. I unclip my helmet as I skate toward the bench.
My dad is standing near the boards talking to our assistant coach, but something’s not right. He shifts from one foot to another, like he’s nervous or uncomfortable. Arms crossed too tightly across his chest, his fingers tapping against his elbows like he can’t keep them still.
He must sense me watching. His head turns toward me, and for a second, I see something in his eyes that looks a lot like fear or remorse. It vanishes as quickly as it appears. He nods at our assistant coach and walks off without saying another word.
I should say something, but I’m happy practice is over, because I’m tired of pretending that I don’t know he has something to do with Ellias’s death. Maybe he saw it happen and looked the other way.
And this wasn’t the first time.
I hit the showers fast, wanting to catch part of Luna’s practice. I put on a hoodie, hoping no one notices me as I head toward the balcony that overlooks the skating rink.
Luna is on the ice going through her lifts with Nico, her curls tied up in a ponytail. A few strands fall loose around her face.
God, she’s beautiful.
Not in a way people say when they see a model in a catalog. She’s beautiful like gravity, pulling you in without even trying.
She doesn’t skate. She commands the ice. It’s like watching a tornado in motion.
“Real subtle, Aldenhurst.” Jasper leans on the rail next to me.
I ignore him, eyes still locked on her. Watching her skate calms something inside me.
“But I won’t lie, though, she’s really good,” Jasper says as she glides into a perfect spin.
He hasn’t even seen half of the things she can do, because she’s holding back. He hasn’t seen the way she moves when she thinks no one’s watching.
I could watch her forever, but if I had a choice, I’d rather be down there with her. Feeling what it’s like to move with her, to match her rhythm like we did at the Shadow Rink.
“You still mad at me about the archives?” Jasper elbows me.
“You put her in danger.”
“She was gonna do it with or without me, mate. You know how stubborn your girl is.”
My girl.
“I went with her to keep her safe.” He glances at me from the corner of his eye, and I don’t respond, because he’s right. And I hate that he’s right.
“The only reason you’re still mad at me is because you two had makeup sex, we didn’t, and you need someone to be mad at.” Then with a perfectly timed smirk, he adds, “But we can fix that right now. I’m a great kisser.”
“Fuck off.”
Jasper chuckles.
I turn back to the ice, watching my girl. They’re doing their backward crossovers. Luna’s getting ready for their back press lift, but she hesitates for a second, not long enough for most people to notice, but I do. Something’s wrong. I can feel it in my chest.
“Wait—” I say, like she can hear me through the glass.
Nico’s hands grip her waist, then she pushes off the ice. For a second, she’s flying and it’s beautiful. But something twists in my chest.
Then she’s getting ready to land, but her blades don’t catch the way they should. Nico tries to reach for her, but it’s too late.
She falls on the ice, bringing Nico down with her.
“Luna!” I shout, but she’s not moving.
I’m running toward the stairs before my brain catches up. My skates aren’t even on, but I don’t care as I run across the ice toward her, almost falling before I catch myself.
Nico is beside her, holding his arm. He looks pale, too, but I can’t focus on him right now. Not when she’s still on the ground and not moving.
“Hey, baby. I’m here.” I kneel beside her.
The coaches and students are rushing around us, and Jasper’s talking to the school med, but I can barely breathe.
“Zayden…” she whispers.
Our eyes lock for a second before hers close again.
“I’m right here. You’re okay. Help is coming. Just hold on for me, okay, baby.” I try to keep the panic out of my voice, but fail miserably. For a second, everything fades, the light, the noises. Moonlight spills across black ice, my breath ghosting white in front of me.
I blink hard, and it’s gone. The rink, the lights, the shouts, rush back into focus. I grip her hands tighter. I can’t lose her too.
I can’t lose her, too.
I meant it when I said I wouldn’t survive if something happened to her. I barely did last time when I lost my mom. I went to that frozen lake ready to end everything like she did, but then I saw her.
My little storm.
Skating alone, like something out of a dream. She saved me without knowing, and I can’t lose her.
The medics burst through the rink, sliding across the ice with stretchers and bags. I want to fight them for touching her. I want to carry her myself.
But I have to let go.
Her hand slips from mine as they lift her.
“Zayden—” she whispers again.
“I’ve got you, baby,” I call out, standing to follow. “I’m right behind you. I’m not going anywhere.”
Nico is being loaded onto another gurney. I follow as they wheel them out of the rink and toward the glass doors that lead to the athletes’ recovery wing.
“You can’t go past this point.” A staff member stops me from going in.
“She needs me,” I try to argue.
“I’m sorry, please wait here.”
I want to push her out of the way and go after her.
The doors close behind them, and I’m left standing feeling helpless.
“Come on, Z.” Jasper grips my shoulder.
I don’t move until he tugs me away, basically dragging me toward the hallway that leads toward the exit.
I lean back, trying to breathe, but I’m not getting enough air. And Jasper pacing in front of me is not helping.
“I don’t think this is a coincidence,” he mutters, barely loud enough for me to hear. “I told you we might have triggered something, then this happens.” He runs a hand through his hair. “And now Luna… Fuck, Zayden. What if this wasn’t an accident?”
His words feel like gasoline on an already raging fire in my chest, because I’m thinking it, too.
My phone buzzes in my pocket.
Coach: Come to my office.
I show Jasper the screen.
He glances at it then back at me. “You think he knows something?”
I think about the look I saw on his face earlier.
I don’t think, I know he knows something.