Epilogue
Two Months Later
Essie stood in the bathroom, staring down at the little stick, not surprised to see it was positive. Even though she’d suspected, now it was two-pink-lines official.
She was pregnant with Xander’s baby.
It definitely wasn’t a shock. They’d even discussed it, saying if it happened, it happened. On some level, they both seemed to want it. They certainly had an active sex life full of passion and spontaneity. And an obvious lack of condoms.
Maybe because they’d experienced so much loss, they were ready to embrace life.
A small smile touched her lips. Being able to give Xander a child might help erase more of the darkness that clung to him.
It still lingered, hiding in the deepest corners of his heart, but he dealt with it now.
Guilt was a tricky thing. A heaviness that didn’t just disappear overnight.
But he’d come so far, and she was so proud of him.
Having Tomás around seemed to help, too. When her brother seemed reluctant to return to boarding school in Europe, Xander suggested he live with them and attend a local school. With zero hesitation and a smile on his handsome face. Essie couldn’t love him more if she tried.
Xander had embraced her little brother as family, and it made her heart so happy.
She loved watching them bond. They especially enjoyed watching hockey together and always had a blast cheering on their favorite team, the Denver Deep Freeze.
When fights broke out on the ice, they went wild.
Xander also promised to take Tomás fly fishing in the river once the spring snowmelt settled in June, and Tomás was counting down the days.
With Xander as their sponsor, both Essie and Tomás were on their way to becoming permanent US residents.
And having General Mitchell Evans in their corner didn’t hurt.
He’d stepped in and covered for Xander, explaining to the CIA suits that Xander had been ordered to fake his death after being recruited for a special black ops team.
No more questions were asked, and Xander Hawke had risen from the ashes like a phoenix.
The front door opened and closed, and she knew Xander was back from running errands. Pulling in a deep breath, trying to contain her excitement, Essie tossed the stick into the trash and hurried to meet the love of her life.
He’d just hung up his coat and kicked off his boots when she came around the corner.
Dios mío, the man never ceased to make her stomach flutter.
She took a moment to admire his broad shoulders and the way his muscles flexed as he moved.
Mmm, and that perfect ass. Her head tilted, studying all the deliciousness.
And the best part? He was all hers. She felt like the luckiest woman in the world.
“Hey, gorgeous,” he drawled, slowly turning around and approaching her with long, languid strides. “Did you miss me?”
“Terribly.” She went up on her toes as he dragged her against his body and kissed the spit out of her.
“Tomás is at school?” He began nuzzling her neck, his hands sliding over her ass and squeezing. He always made sure they were alone before he pounced.
“Yes, but…” She wriggled away and lightly touched the diamond cross around her neck. It was new, a gift from Xander since José had snapped the chain on her old one. “I have something to tell you.”
His deep blue gaze searched hers. “Is everything okay?”
She took his big, rough hand and placed it over her lower belly. “How would you feel about a new addition to our little family? Maybe in November?”
“Holy shit,” he breathed. A huge grin broke out on his face, and then he picked her up and spun her in a circle. He gave her another kiss then set her back on her feet. “You’re sure?”
“I took two tests, but I need to schedule a doctor’s appointment. I guess it was bound to happen sooner or later.”
“Sooner is fine by me.” He pulled back, looking thoughtful. “I was going to wait and do this tonight, but now… Hell, nothing ever really goes according to plan, so…”
He dropped to one knee and her jaw dropped.
Then he reached into his back pocket. “I just picked it up from getting sized.” He lifted a stunning diamond ring.
A classic solitaire. “Even got it engraved.” He tilted it so she could see the words “Mi Estrella” written in a pretty cursive font on the inside of the gold band.
“Dios mío.”
“I’m not really a man who has a lot of traditions, but I’d like to start some with you.
” He reached for her hand, pressed a kiss to her knuckles then slid the ring onto her finger.
A perfect fit. “You changed my world, Essie. My star who guided me out of the darkness. I love you so much, mi Estrella hermosa.” He pulled in a steadying breath.
“Estrella María Fuentes Barrera, will you marry me?”
“Yes.” She grasped his precious face in her hands, tears welling in her eyes. “Being your wife would make me so very happy.”
“You sure about that? I’ve been told I can be a pain in the ass.” He gave her a lopsided grin.
“If it involves that fine ass of yours, Mr. Hawke, I’m in.” She leaned down until her lips practically touched his, and whispered, “I couldn’t love you more, Xander Hawke.”
They shared another long kiss before Xander got back up, scooping her into his arms. “Brand called and wants us to come down to Old Glory. He closed the bar and said he has good news.” But instead of putting her down, he turned toward their bedroom.
Essie tightened her arms around his neck as he hurried down the hall, and she laughed. “I thought we were going to Old Glory.”
“Oh, we are. But I’m going to pleasure my fiancée first.”
“I have a feeling you’re going to be a very good husband.” She began nibbling on his earlobe, and he groaned.
“When it comes to you, Peaches, I’m going to be the best.”
Then he tossed her onto the bed.
Old Glory could wait.
Two screaming orgasms and a lingering shower together—which led to a third orgasm—Xander and Essie finally made it to Old Glory.
The men who had become his closest friends sat with their lovely ladies at the big, scarred wooden table in the back beside the fireplace.
No fire burned since it was a warm spring day in mid-April, and the rear doors leading onto the back deck stood open.
“All of My Love” by Led Zeppelin filled the air.
Beyond fitting. He loved classic rock, and it had been a long time since he’d allowed himself to simply enjoy the music.
The women hugged Essie and the men greeted Xander with fist bumps.
“Heads-up, Hawke.” Brand slid a glass across the table and Xander caught it, noticing his buddy had opened the hand-painted bottle of Clase Azul Jalisco Limited Edition Xander had gifted him on his fiftieth birthday.
He’d snatched it from Fernando Lazaro’s private stash after cutting off his finger.
“Essie?” When he started to pour some for her, she held up a hand and murmured a quiet no thank you. He lifted a brow but didn’t comment.
“You finally opened it.” Xander lifted the glass, tipped it in Brand’s direction and took a sip. Fuck yeah. Talk about the good stuff. “What’s the occasion?”
“Mitch called. The CIA sent a team to Tierra Caliente. They blew up the bunker and the narco tunnels.”
Beside him, Essie sucked in a sharp breath. Xander laced his fingers through hers, relief filling him. It was over.
“The Lazaro Cartel is finished.” Brand smiled. “I thought that was a pretty good reason to open the good shit.”
“I can’t say any tequila is worth twenty grand a bottle, but this is mighty tasty.” Lex swallowed the rest of his back.
A sudden squeal pierced the air and Lottie grabbed Essie’s left hand, lifting it up so everyone could see the diamond ring. “You’re engaged!”
“Jesus, Sunshine, you almost gave me a heart attack.” Chaz pressed a hand to his chest. “I thought you went into labor.”
“Not yet, but soon enough.” She released Essie’s hand and covered her large stomach. “Congratulations! It’s gorgeous!”
“Thank you,” Essie murmured as everyone expressed their good wishes.
Xander threaded his fingers through hers again and sent her a questioning look. As much as he wanted to shout about her pregnancy from the rooftops, he wouldn’t unless she gave the okay. When she nodded, he grinned from ear to ear and made the announcement.
“She’s also expecting.” He cleared his throat, chest puffing out. “We’re going to have a baby.”
Another round of cheers filled the air.
“An engagement and a baby? Holy hell, Hawke, you’re a new man.” Jayson thumped him on the back, and his wife Sabrina sent them a grin.
For the first time, Xander felt like a part of the group. He also finally understood why his team had been falling like dominoes over the past year. Once you find your soulmate, you experience a sense of completeness. A love so strong, nothing else matters as much as being with that other person.
“How the mighty have fallen,” Julia murmured, smiling and leaning against Brand’s arm.
“I freaking love it,” Ellie added, sniffling softly and discreetly swiping at her misty eyes.
“You’re such a romantic, Ellie-Bean,” Wes teased, kissing her temple.
“Because everyone deserves to find their happily-ever-after,” she whispered, and her husband dropped a kiss on her shoulder.
“When’s the wedding?” Sera asked.
Xander looked over at Essie. “Whenever she wants.”
“I’m thinking in June. Before I get as big as a house. No offense, Lottie.”
“You have so much to look forward to,” Lottie said dryly, and they all chuckled.
“Anyone up for a game of Most Likely?” Corey asked.
“Oh, yes, let’s play!” As Sera reached behind her and grabbed the worn box off the brick hearth, Lex’s phone buzzed.
“Lex Battle,” he answered.
Xander noticed the dark look that passed over his friend’s face. A look he knew too well—grief. Helplessness. Finality.
A few moments later, he disconnected the call and shoved his chair back. “Sorry, but I have to go.”
“Everything okay?” Xander asked.
Lex hesitated, then slid his phone into his back pocket. “My dad.”
He didn’t need to say more. They all knew his father’s health had been rapidly declining, and his dementia had been getting worse.
“If you need anything, let us know,” Jayson told him, and everyone nodded.
“Thanks.” He sighed and looked down at the floor, shaking his head and huffing out a humorless laugh before meeting his friends’ gazes again. “But unless you can rewind time, there’s not much anyone can do. I’ll see you later.”
A solemn silence settled over the group as they watched him walk out.
“I hate seeing him so down,” Julia murmured after the door clicked shut. “Isn’t his birthday coming up? We could throw him a surprise party.”
“That’s a great idea, baby.” Brand poured another round for everyone. “Madden, you’re in charge of the party favors.”
Everyone snickered.
“No strippers,” Jayson warned, and they all laughed.
The mood began to lighten again, and Sera picked the first card from the box.
“We’ll join you in a few.” Xander stood up, pulling Essie with him. “I need some alone-time with my fiancée.”
While they began the silly game of questions, Xander led Essie outside onto the back deck. It was a perfect night with a full moon and a million stars. An unseasonably warm breeze lifted her dark hair, and he couldn’t drag his eyes off her for all the money in the world.
“You’re so beautiful.” He wrapped his arms around her. Pressed his forehead against hers and breathed deeply. My cinnamon-dusted star. How was it possible to love her so much, he ached? “Are you happy?”
“You make me practically giddy,” she teased, and he chuckled.
“It must be all those orgasms.”
“They are a nice bonus.” She slid her hands up his arms, turning serious. “But the real gift is loving each other.”
The backs of his eyes burned. “You make it so easy to love you, mi Estrella.”
“I never would’ve guessed you’re such an emotional man, Xander Hawke.”
“Not until you.” He willed the damn tears to go away. Such a nuisance. “You’re turning me into an ol’ softie.”
“By the time our daughter comes along, you’re going to be nothing but a big marshmallow.”
He arched a brow. “Daughter?”
“Just a feeling.” Her lashes fluttered and she trailed a finger over his bottom lip. “How do you feel about a little girl?”
His heart swelled. Not long ago, he believed the only thing that would make him feel good—whole—was revenge. It had ruled his mind, his heart and his soul. But now he knew differently.
He flicked his tongue against her finger. “I predict she’s going to have me wrapped around her tiny finger. Just like her beautiful mother.”
Pulling her against the length of his body, he kissed her. Kissed her like she was the absolute light of his life. His guiding star. His salvation. His love.
In the end, he’d learned love was the most powerful force. Stronger than revenge. Formidable enough to conquer the most pressing darkness. The light of Essie’s love had shown him that.
Hell, she was more than a mere star.
She was a damn supernova. Bright enough to outshine an entire galaxy.
And she would always be the center of his.
I hope you enjoyed Xander and Essie’s hard-fought, happily-ever-after. If you’d like a little glimpse into their future—say about nine months—then make sure to grab their BONUS EPILOGUE.