12. Lyra
A sob burst out of me, and the next second, I was surrounded by my pack.
They had no way of knowing these were tears of relief instead of the usual sadness I’d been overwhelmed with for so long. It was just as Pascal explained, my true pack was here for me no matter what. Now it was my turn to accept their help, which was being freely given to me.
“I’m so sorry,” I managed to get out as I tried to slow my heaving breaths. “I didn’t understand…” Pausing, I shook my head. “No, I didn’t want to understand. Somehow, I’d convinced myself it was safer to simply expect people to leave me, so what would be the point in giving them my heart?”
Hands grasped my waist, and I was lifted off Pascal and found myself standing in front of Eli, who was smiling sweetly. Gently, he used his fingers to comb my hair back and out of my face. “There is no need to apologize, my sweet petal. Trust between a pack and its Omega isn’t something that happens overnight simply because we’re scent matched. It doesn’t help matters that our pack has been under attack since the unfortunate meeting with Mr. Noble at the Scent Matchers headquarters.”
I frowned at his choice of words. “What do you mean? Has someone intentionally been giving out personal information about us?”
“Yes,” Eli admitted, letting out a heavy sigh, and looked past me to the others. “Mira Chambers took it upon herself to use the court of public opinion as a weapon. Jonathan, my lawyer, had an investigator looking for the sources who leaked things to the press. Turns out there was only one person, Mrs. Chambers herself.”
Tanner crossed his arms as anger flashed in his eyes. “Doesn’t that seem rather overkill for being sued? It’s not like you were intending to send her to jail. Worst-case, she’d lose her job on top of having to pay for damages against you and your sister.”
Eli grunted as he tucked me to his side and kissed the top of my head. “I think this conversation should wait until we’ve had dinner. On my way home I picked up some pizzas, so I suggest we eat them while they’re still hot.”
As if on cue, Fawn’s stomach growled loudly enough for us all to hear. His cheeks flushed as he slapped his hands to his stomach. “I guess it wants to make sure I didn’t skip dinner like I did lunch.”
Needing no further encouragement, everyone headed for the kitchen, grabbed everything we’d need, and settled around the table. It would seem Fawn wasn’t the only person who was hungry, as the only sound to be heard was moans of delight as we dug in. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but sitting here watching everyone eat felt right. In a way, I was experiencing what I imagined people who put on glasses for the first time felt. Nothing had changed in the world around me except for my ability to view it differently.
I’d never noticed the blanket of warmth that surrounded the table as the guys started rating the best pizza toppings. The last time I could remember experiencing this feeling was when my parents were alive. My fathers would come home from work loudly announcing their arrival, which was my cue to race from the kitchen where I’d been helping my mother to greet them. I’d been given the important role of ensuring they took their shoes off and put on their slippers. It was something my mother had put into place shortly after bonding so my fathers would remember to leave work at the door. Now, here I sat with my own pack wondering what silly rules or traditions I might bring into our family.
“Hey, you okay?” Pascal asked as he placed his hand over mine.
Shaking myself out of my memories, I smiled but knew it wasn’t convincing. “I was remembering something about my childhood I’d forgotten about. It appears that with my memory of that night coming back allowed me to remember more of the happy days as well.”
“Is that a good thing?” Pascal asked hesitantly.
I nodded as I slipped my hand out from under his so I could lace our fingers together. “My childhood was filled with many wonderful moments. The reason my mother took the loss of my fathers so hard was because of how madly in love they were. Mother was a woman who liked order and to keep things tidy, but my fathers made sure she never forgot to enjoy life.”
“I love hearing you talk about your fathers,” Fawn announced, his chin propped on his hands, looking rather adorable. “Every time you bring them up, your expression becomes so soft, and your eyes sparkle. Promise me you won’t hold back sharing stories about them, I want to know everything.”
The rest of the guys nodded in agreement, and I could tell they meant it. My pack wanted to know whatever version of my parents I could give them. My chest ached with how loved I felt with such a simple request.
“I promise,” I whispered, proud that I’d managed to get that much out with how tight my throat felt.
Fawn winked at me before changing the topic and giving me a moment to pull myself together. “Well, lie-lie, we’ve now eaten. Any chance you might be willing to share more about what you’ve learned today?”
Eli pushed his chair back from the table, then stood and poured himself a drink from the wet bar. He glanced at everyone else as if to ask if they’d like a drink.
“I’ll take one of whatever you’re pouring,” Zachary said as he settled back in his seat.
Tanner shook his head, but what surprised me was Pascal’s nod of agreement. I didn’t see any problem with people drinking or choosing not to for whatever reason. However, Pascal struck me as someone who didn’t like not being in control of himself. Of course, one drink wouldn’t get the man trashed, he had enough muscle mass on him that it wasn’t a concern. Yet I couldn’t shake the feeling that the only reason my Alphas were drinking right now was to help keep their tempers in check.
Eli passed out the glasses and handed one to Tanner. “It’s something I used to make for my sister since she couldn’t drink but didn’t want to feel left out.”
“Thanks, man,” Tanner said as he took the rock glass and sipped the golden liquid. His brows shot up as he went back for a second bigger taste of the drink. “Damn, this is good.”
“It’s ginger beer, lime, and mint,” Eli shared, crossing one leg over the other, trying to appear relaxed. “If you want more ideas for alternatives, Warrick, one of my sister’s Alphas, owns a bar and has made it his mission to find the best mocktails. He should be at the studio tomorrow when we go to visit.”
“Whose studio?”
“We’re visiting your sister?” Fawn and I said at the same time.
Eli grinned as he took another sip of his drink as if he enjoyed teasing us. “I know the past week we’ve been keeping a low profile and giving all of us time to rest after all that’s gone on. That being said, I feel like it’s time we got out of the house and did something fun. When I talked to Bailey-Rose this afternoon, she offered to do a fun art class at her studio. She knows better than anyone what it feels like to be cooped up. Plus, her studio is safe and a place where no one has to worry about the press bothering us.”
Fawn squealed and shimmied his shoulders in what I would call a happy dance. “This. Is. Gonna be amazing ,” Fawn announced in a sing-song voice and finished it off with a flourish of jazz hands.
None of us could keep from smiling as we watched how excited Fawn was. I’d heard so much about Bailey-Rose from Eli and his mother that I felt like we’d already met. Yet I also felt a little nervous. I knew how much his little sister meant to him. What would happen if we didn’t get along? There was no doubt Bailey-Rose and Fawn would be instant friends, but I was older and less carefree. What if I had a panic attack and was unable to get in the car?
Goddammit, why couldn’t I ever simply be excited about something? What was wrong with my brain? Why did I always jump to the worst-case scenario first?
The shock of something cold running along the side of my neck had me gasping as I jerked away. It took a second for my brain to process what happened and to register I was gripping Pascal’s wrist. His fingers held a large ice cube he must have taken from his drink and used to snap me out of my spiral. Slowly, he moved the ice toward my neck. When I didn’t stop him, I felt the ice as it was massaged from below my ear down to my collarbone.
“I’ve been researching how best to help you when we notice a panic attack starting,” Pascal explained in a soft voice. “There was a whole article on the benefits of stimulating the vagus nerve, causing it to reduce your body’s response to anxiety.”
I shivered as I felt the cold water trickle down my chest and pool between my breasts. This trick’s effect on me was remarkable in how fast my body was calming down. Typically, it could take anywhere up to an hour or more for the effects of my anxiety to dissipate if I didn’t take any medication. However, Pascal’s slow, seductive touch was bringing out a different response from my body.
The next thing I knew, I’d straddled my Alpha, sucked his lower lip into my mouth, then moaned at his rich cedar and earthy sage scent. Pascal wrapped one arm around my hips, locking my lower half tight to his body while the other hand gripped the back of my neck. I whimpered when I couldn’t get the friction I wanted as I ground my pussy over his rock-hard cock. Pascal’s hand fisted in my hair and used his grip to break our kiss.
“Lyra,” Pascal rasped as he rested his forehead against mine. “I want to give in to my need for you, but I refuse to be used as an escape. Sex and intimacy have been used against me by my family since I presented as an Alpha. Everything in me is screaming for me to simply let out my lust on you because you’re my Omega. The last thing I want is for you to ever think your only value is taking my knot, just as I don’t want to be used as a distraction.”
Instantly, my body cooled at his words, horrified I might have been doing what he accused me of. For Omegas, sex wasn’t just about breeding, it was another way to feel loved and connected to their pack. I’d needed reassurance, and my instincts drove me to the one thing an Alpha would find hard to reject. Unable to look Pascal in the face, I hid in the crook of his neck as he hugged me close and purred.
“I’m so sorry,” I mumbled against his skin.
A hand stroked over my hair, and a kiss pressed to my head. “You’re forgiven, my darling. I’ll always forgive you. Instinct is a powerful thing, and if I’d been any other Alpha, I would have happily offered myself as a distraction. There is no doubt in my mind that as our relationship strengthens, these fears of mine will dissipate.”
With his acceptance of my apology, the knot of guilt in my stomach eased. I sat up, cupped his face, and kissed Pascal since I didn’t have words to describe how I felt about him. In my eyes he was perfect. I loved the depth of his emotions, how sharp his mind was, and the way he blushed when I told him how handsome he was. Pascal’s family better hope I never caught them disrespecting this man, or I’d have a thing or two to say about it.
I made sure I pulled back first, not wanting to push things too far. A soft moan reminded me we were not alone, and the others had been witness to my mistake. However, I was not prepared to find Fawn on Tanner’s lap, arms wrapped around his neck, legs spread, and rocking wildly on our Alpha’s cock, which was balls deep in Fawn’s ass. This wasn’t the first time since moving in I’d seen Fawn getting fucked randomly throughout the day. Not only was he an Omega, but due to his mother being a junkie while pregnant, it caused Fawn to be hypersexual.
Fearing I might not be able to control myself if I remained straddling Pascal, so I got up. I collected dishes off the table, needing something to do as I felt Fawn’s pleasure through our bond. I’d learned there was a way to temporarily close the door between us so as not to overwhelm the other person, which Fawn usually did for his spontaneous romps, except for this time. My guess why he hadn’t was because he assumed Pascal and I would be fucking, so why bother to hide it.
I’d made it to the kitchen and was about to put the dishes in the sink when Fawn orgasmed. The dishes crashed, and the sound against the stainless-steel sink echoed loudly, covering my moan. My death grip on the lip of the sink and my locked knees were the only thing keeping me upright. Hands ran down my back until they hooked the band of my leggings, which were yanked down to my knees. Hot breath caressed my ass as my Alpha knelt behind me and carefully helped me step out of my leggings.
I started to turn but was halted as he used both hands on my ass to pin me against the counter. Using his elbows, he shoved my legs wide enough to get his shoulders between them. The feel of teeth scraping over the sheer fabric of my thong had my legs shaking. Then with his nose, I felt my panties get shoved to the side, exposing my dripping pussy. A pleased growl was my only warning before my Alpha’s mouth was feasting on me.
“Oh fuck ,” I screamed as I came instantly.
Experiencing Fawn’s orgasm had put me right on the edge, and all it had taken was a single flick of the tongue to have my body crumbling. Thanks to my Alpha’s forward-thinking, I didn’t crash to the floor. Instead, I was propped up by his shoulders. I glanced down and knew by the powder blue button-down, Eli was the man between my legs.