CHAPTER TEN
When she saw the group—all of them members of her not-a-fan club—gathered in the kitchen, Kelsey wanted to turn right around and leave the house.
“We have plenty of food left from lunch,” Rori said. “Let’s get you a plate.”
Kelsey wanted to protest, but honestly, she was hungry. The fact that seeing Zane and his parents there didn’t rob her of her appetite hopefully meant that her resolve to make the situation work hadn’t completely vanished in the face of reality.
Kelsey approached the counter where Cathy and Dan stood. Zane’s mom moved over to sit at the breakfast nook with Zane, and her husband followed.
Lee bent to give Rori a kiss, then helped her get containers out of the fridge. Rori set an empty paper plate in front of Kelsey. “Take whatever you’d like. There’s plenty.”
Kelsey wasn’t that hungry, but she still managed to fill her plate. It all looked good. She wondered what Zane had thought of the food. So far, he hadn’t done any cooking that she’d seen since coming to Serenity.
That was a bit of a surprise because even though his job was to cook, he was rarely so tired of it that he refused to cook at home on his days off. In fact, most of the time he decided to cook in their apartment, he’d pull her into the kitchen with him and make her his sous chef. She had some great memories of those moments.
Rori placed a glass on the counter. “You can sit here.”
Grateful that Rori hadn’t sent her over to the breakfast nook, Kelsey sat down on one of the bar stools. She stared at her plate for a moment, willing her stomach to settle so she could eat what she’d taken.
“So you found our biggest and nicest park, huh?” Lee said.
“Quite by accident,” Kelsey said as she took a sip of her water. “It’s a beautiful place.”
“It is,” Lee agreed. “Hudson proposed to Kayleigh there.”
“Really?” Kelsey hadn’t heard that.
“Yep.”
“How did Zane propose to you?” Rori asked.
Kelsey tensed, but then focused on her plate. “Over a meal he cooked for me for our six-month dating anniversary. He’d prepared my favorite meal, which included a chocolate souffle. As we were eating our dessert, he presented me with a ring.”
She looked down at her fingers and the rings that Zane had placed there. They were looser on her than they had been before, but they were as beautiful as the day Zane had slid them onto her finger.
It felt a bit weird to be talking about Zane like he wasn’t there, but unfortunately, in a sense, he wasn’t. At least not the Zane who had chosen the engagement and wedding rings, then pledged his love to her.
“You were a very pretty bride.”
Kelsey almost fell off her stool at Mrs. Halverson’s words. Out of habit, she glanced at Zane, but there was no expression on his face. Looking back at the older woman, she said, “Thank you.”
“Did you not want a larger wedding?” Cathy asked. “Rather than eloping?”
Kelsey wasn’t sure where the conversation was headed, but all she could do was be honest about what had gone into that decision. “When we got engaged, Zane said he didn’t want a long engagement. At that point, we were still thinking of just having a small wedding. But then, a few days later, he got the job offer in Tampa. He wanted me to go with him, so we decided to just elope.”
“And you don’t regret it?”
“No. We both agreed it was more important to move on to the marriage part of our relationship, rather than spend a lot of time and money on a fancy wedding. It seemed a waste of money when we needed to finance the move and setting up our new life in Tampa.”
“And your family didn’t mind that you eloped?” she asked.
Kelsey felt like the answers to these questions held weight, but she had no idea what the woman wanted her to say. “No. I’m not super close with my family, so it didn’t really matter to them when we eloped.”
“And did Zane say what his family might think?”
She glanced at Zane. But once again, he was no help. He was clearly listening to the conversation, but he didn’t seem to have any comments himself.
“He didn’t think you’d be happy to miss out on his wedding, but he said that there had been so many other family weddings that it wouldn’t be a big deal if he didn’t have an elaborate one himself.”
“He really didn’t want a big wedding,” Lee added. “I spoke to him following their engagement, and the one thing he said was that he didn’t want anything big.”
Kelsey hoped that even if they didn’t want to hear it from her, they’d accept it from Lee. She’d known that they weren’t happy, but it seemed that Mrs. Halverson had taken offense at the fact they’d chosen to elope rather than have a wedding.
“Our weddings have all been a reflection of what we, as couples, wanted,” Lee said. “It’s not fair to hold it against Kelsey and Zane that they preferred to have something for just the two of them. If that’s what they wanted, we need to respect that.”
“What’s done is done,” Zane said, finally wading into the conversation. “It’s not like we can go back and redo it. I might not remember the wedding, but I do know that in the past, I expressed a preference for a smaller wedding versus a larger one.”
“I know you said that,” Cathy said. “But I didn’t realize that meant we wouldn’t be there at all.”
“I’m sorry that I can’t tell you for certain why Zane made that decision,” Kelsey told her. He had mentioned that getting his mom involved would most likely lead to a more complicated event than they wanted. However, she didn’t say that out loud.
If this was going to be something Mrs. Halverson couldn’t let go of, they’d never have a chance to develop any sort of relationship. Not that she felt like there was much of a chance to begin with.
“Let’s just let the wedding go,” Zane said. “Of all the issues facing me at the moment, the motivation behind why we eloped is not even on the list.”
“You’re right, of course, darling.” Cathy rested her hand on Zane’s arm. “It’s not important.”
“The fact they’re married is important,” Lee said. “Just not how they ended up that way.”
Kelsey liked the reminder from Lee that he and Rori were there for her. So far, they were the only members of the family who had really warmed up to her. Not that the others had been rude or anything, they just hadn’t shown much interest in getting to know her.
Which, if she was honest, wasn’t a big deal. Especially considering the circumstances of Zane’s accident.
It seemed like Mrs. Halverson was most upset at not being able to be a part of a special event in her son’s life. But there was also still a feeling that she didn’t think Kelsey was good enough for Zane.
Since she’d never had one, Kelsey didn’t understand a protective parent. Her parents wouldn’t have cared that she was getting married, with even less interest in who she was marrying. But she thought that having over-protective parents would be better than ones who were focused on things other than the children they’d birthed.
“We should probably head home,” Mr. Halverson said, getting to his feet. “I think there’s still time for a nap.”
There were a couple of snickers, and at least one muttered mention of old folks . Kelsey would have to side with the old folks in this regard because she was ready for a nap herself. Her long walk was definitely catching up with her.
Both of the Halverson parents made sure to say goodbye to Kelsey, which made her equal parts grateful and suspicious. Though she did her best not to reveal the suspicions she harbored over their sudden warming up, Kelsey suspected that she might not have succeeded.
Once they were gone, a quiet settled over the house. Leaning against the counter, Lee took Rori in his arms. She relaxed back against him, and the tension melted from her face.
Witnessing that interaction, Kelsey knew that Lee was Rori’s home. He was her safe place. Her protection from the world.
Zane had been that for her, but that wasn’t the case anymore. Now, what she needed protection from the most was him. Or rather, her love for him because if he never remembered her, the heartbreak would be immense.
“I think we’re just going to hang out in our room,” Lee said after he and Zane had a brief conversation about something that had evidently been brought up earlier with their siblings.
“See you in a bit,” Rori said with a smile as she took Lee’s hand when he held it out to her.
A weighty silence settled over the kitchen in their absence, and as much as she’d once have loved to hang out with Zane, Kelsey was filled with a strong desire to leave. She took her nearly empty paper plate to the garbage, then picked up her glass.
“Do you think we could talk for a bit?”
It was a good thing she hadn’t taken a drink of her water, or she would have choked on it. Instead, she clutched the glass between her hands and turned to face Zane.
“Uh… sure.”
On legs that trembled just a bit, Kelsey made her way to the breakfast nook, fearful of what Zane might have to say to her. Had his parents been nice to her earlier because they knew she was on her way out?
Once she was seated, she lifted her glass to take a sip of water. Just to have something to do.
Zane looked down at his hands as he turned his phone over and over, making Kelsey’s stomach twist. Just when she’d resolved to stay strong, she was being presented with a situation that threatened to break her down.
“I want to apologize for my attitude toward you since the accident.” Kelsey could only stare at Zane in shock, his words having rendered her speechless. “I know it doesn’t reflect well on me, but honestly, I’ve just wanted to put my head in the sand when it comes to our relationship. It felt like the easiest thing to do.”
“I understand,” she said, though she didn’t, really.
“You shouldn’t have to, but I appreciate it.” Zane gave a familiar sigh, and if it still signified the same thing, it meant he was frustrated with himself. “I think we need to have a conversation about how we’re going to approach this.”
“Would you like me to leave?” she asked, needing to tear the bandage off.
He stared at her for a long moment. Unfortunately, Kelsey had zero confidence in her ability to read his expressions anymore, so she had no idea what he was thinking.
“Though that is tempting, simply because it would be the easiest thing for me, it’s not the right thing.” Zane’s brow furrowed as he hesitated. “From what Lee has said, the me before the accident would be absolutely livid if I didn’t give you… us… a chance.”
Kelsey agreed, but she didn’t let him know that. It felt important to really get a feel for what he was thinking before she revealed her own thoughts about their situation.
“So, I want to give us a chance,” he continued. “I’m just not sure what that will look like.”
Kelsey hadn’t given it a lot of thought, but a few things came to mind. “Maybe I could drive you to your doctor's appointments. And instead of avoiding each other, we need to accept that we’re sharing space here.”
Zane nodded. “My parents will most likely want to go with me, but you could probably come.”
“I’d like that.” Even if she had to put up with awkward moments with Zane’s parents.
Zane regarded her for a moment, his brown eyes serious. “How did we meet?”
“We both worked at the same restaurant in Chicago,” she said. “You’d been working there for a couple of months already when I was hired.”
“Did we start dating right away?”
Kelsey shook her head. “Rumor had it that you weren’t giving any woman the time of day romantically, so even though I thought you were attractive and a nice guy, I didn’t flirt with you or anything like that. Instead, we became friends.”
“Why did things change?” Zane asked.
“It wasn’t intentional.”
“So, how did it happen?”
Kelsey couldn’t help but smile as she thought back to that time. “We had planned to meet for dinner with some other friends from the restaurant on our night off. Everyone else cancelled at the last minute, which meant it was just you and me at the restaurant we’d agreed to meet at. I kind of thought you’d bail too, but we decided to go ahead and eat there like we’d planned.”
“And that was it?”
“Sort of,” she said. “We ended up talking for hours. We stayed until the restaurant closed, then moved on to a twenty-four- hour place. We stayed there until around three in the morning. Though we both tried to pass it off as us just getting closer as friends, that didn’t last too long, especially since we parted ways with a hug.”
“Who made the first move to take it beyond friendship?”
Kelsey took a drink of her water. “That was you.”
His brows lifted. “Really?”
She nodded. “There was no way that I was going to put myself out there when everything I’d heard was that you didn’t want a relationship.”
“But you wanted one?”
“Yes. But I also wasn’t in the market for a broken heart.”
“What did I say to change your mind?”
“It wasn’t so much what you said as what you did.”
“Which was?”
Kelsey thought of that moment, and her heart ached with the memory. “At one point, as we were waiting to cross the street, you grabbed my hand. And you just never let go.”
Until recently, anyway.
“What was our favorite date?”
“Well, it didn’t start out as a date, but eventually, it became one because we did it every week.” She missed those evenings so much right then. “You’d make us dinner, then we’d watch one of those reality cooking shows. While we watched, you’d tell me what you thought of the food they were cooking and how you’d do things differently. You were pretty good at predicting what the judges were going to say, and who was going to end up at the top and at the bottom.”
“And you enjoyed that?” Zane didn’t sound convinced.
“I did. Part of it was just because I got to hang out with you. Part of it was the great food you always prepared. Part of it was getting to know more about you through something you were so passionate about.”
“Did I teach you anything about cooking?”
“A little. We’d do some cooking together on our days off, but I was limited to chopping and, occasionally, stirring.”
Zane seemed to mull over what she’d shared with him. She had no idea what he planned to do with the information. Even if she wanted to jump ahead to getting their relationship back on track, she knew it couldn’t happen that way.
At this point, he either needed to regain his memory, or they had to take their time getting to know each other again. This conversation was just step one in that process, and unfortunately, she knew there was no guarantee that he’d fall in love with her a second time.
It had happened so organically the first time around, which had helped Zane overcome his reluctance to be in a relationship. And it had helped her be willing to take a chance on love with him.
This time, Zane was stuck in the past at a point where he thought he was in love with another woman, and there was a possibility he wouldn’t be willing to let go of it.
“Thank you for sharing all that with me,” Zane said.
“You’re welcome. Feel free to ask me anything about our relationship.”
Zane nodded. “I’ll do that.”
Kelsey wanted to demand to know if he was really going to give them a chance, but she held her tongue. This conversation was more than she’d expected, so she would take it for now. Maybe in the future, she’d be able to ask some questions of her own.
When Zane lifted his hand to rub his forehead, she said, “Headache?”
He glanced at her. “Yeah. But that’s nothing new.”
“Really?”
“My head aches to some degree for a good chunk of most days. Sometimes it’s worse than others.”
“I guess that’s maybe to be expected because of the concussion, right?”
“That’s what they tell me,” he muttered as he ran a hand through his hair. “Doesn’t make it any easier, though.”
Though Kelsey didn’t want this time to end, she didn’t object when he said he needed to go lay down. She hoped that this conversation was the start of more to come.
After he’d left her alone in the kitchen, Kelsey sat by herself for a few minutes, trying to decide if she should get excited or maintain her reserve.
In the end, she decided to be excited in the moment, but reserved in the future. And she needed to keep herself from building up expectations for what was to come.
Zane had promised her nothing. This Zane had promised her nothing.
Her Zane had promised her everything.
And she wanted that everything more than ever.
Her mind might be cautious, but her heart loved and missed Zane so much that it didn’t even want to consider not sticking this out. No matter how difficult it might be.