Chapter 24 #2
“You’ll be fine.” Nate was trying so damn hard, but his nerves shook his voice, strained the syllables of his words.
“This is going to be a nightmare.” I whipped my head around to see his face.
“I’m so sorry.” For so long, I’d managed to dodge the press.
I’d spent years being an expert at evading them—not getting too wild, not taking on endorsement deals, never saying anything that could be misconstrued.
It was no wonder I’d been struggling with and questioning my life in America.
I’d been exhausted.
Sure, there’d been photos over the years of me with no-strings dates to functions, and yes, there’d been a couple of close calls out of the handful of times I’d sought out a willing mouth. But through it all, I’d stayed out of the limelight as much as possible.
It wasn’t unusual to be described as a recluse. It would all change the moment our bubble broke and we stepped into the dry heat of Vegas. Once we did, America would know the real reason for me hiding.
My chest ached, my breathing speeding up.
“Hey.”
I dragged in a painful breath but struggled to fill my lungs. Nate then filled my vision. Out of his seat, he kneeled before me, one hand on my chest, the other on my cheek. “Ryan.” His voice cut through the ringing in my ears, and his outline came into focus.
“You’re going to be okay.” There was no shake this time. No quiver. With an unwavering gaze, he continued, “Just breathe and know you’ve got this.”
Focusing hard on drawing in air, I slowed my breathing, exhaling after a couple of beats. I followed the same pattern, relieved when the pain gripping my lungs eased.
“I need you to listen to me.” He waited until I nodded before continuing. “This, all of this, is just noise. You hear me? None of it is real. It doesn’t matter what photos are taken, what anyone shouts or prints. It’s all just insignificant noise.”
God, how I wanted to believe him, but he didn’t know the world I lived in.
And I’d done a god-awful job at preparing the both of us for this.
His gaze narrowed, and I wondered if I’d spoken aloud, but I realized my boyfriend could simply read me too well.
The thought was just enough distraction to remind me how lucky I was to have him. To have Nate’s heart, his friendship.
“I love you.”
Nate twisted his mouth for a beat, but he finally dropped his frown and smiled. “I love you too. And I know you don’t believe me, and I also know this is going to be a shitfest and overwhelming, but I want you to answer me truthfully.”
Drawing my eyebrows together, I said tentatively, “Okay.”
“Could anyone say or do anything to stop you from being gay?”
I rolled my eyes at him.
“You think it’s a stupid-as-fuck question?”
“Yes.”
“Good. So there’s fuck all anyone can say or do that will stop this part of you from existing.
Being queer is one important part of what makes Ryan Broadwater so epic.
” My heart leaped a little at his words, loving just how incredible this man was.
“There’s also a part of you that is a kick-arse basketball player, a loving brother, uncle, and grandson, a great friend, a man who thinks he’s funnier than he really is—”
“Hey,” I challenged with a laugh. “I so am too hilarious.”
Nate arched a brow at me. “You’re so much more than one part of you. You have hundreds of quirks and traits and skills all combined. And nothing that the gossip rags, or Joe Blogs on the street or watching a game, can say will change that. Or do you think otherwise?”
He was right. Of course he was. The truth of his words registered. It didn’t mean what happened as soon as we got off the plane wouldn’t be exhausting or stressful or absolutely invasive, but only I could dictate and control my reactions and how they impacted me.
“You didn’t add how having a smart, sexy boyfriend has reshaped my heart.” The words were sappy, and perhaps any other day, I would have cringed or laughed and likely taken the piss. But I meant them. And from the look Nate directed my way, he knew it too.
The voice of the captain filled the cabin, asking us to strap in and take our seats. We did so, once again holding hands.
We were heading to Henderson Airport, where a security team would be greeting us. While I expected some press to be milling about outside the gates, we aimed to keep my arrival quiet.
As the wheels touched the tarmac, my attention drifted once more to Nate. “There’s no one else I’d want to do any of this with.”
A wry grin transformed his tense features. “Too bloody right. Plus there’s the fact that no one else could put up with your weird habits.”
“Weird habits? The fuck you talking about?” We taxied down the private runway, but I barely noticed, too focused on Nate.
“You can’t be serious?”
“As a bloody heart attack.”
Nate chuckled. “You don’t think stripping when you do a dump is weird?”
I gaped. “That’s not weird, it’s—hygienic and comfortable. And it’s not like I do it if I’m not at home or in my hotel or anything,” I said. It was something I’d always done, and he knew it. I watched him stand and followed his lead.
“Okay then, whatever you say. What about when you whacked your foot on the bed frame?”
“What about it?” Confused, I stared at him as he took hold of my hand.
“You then kicked the other foot. On purpose.” Wide-eyed, he waited for me to respond.
I shrugged, a little sheepishly this time, aware of the door at the front of the plane opening. “I feel, I don’t know, uneven if I don’t do it.” Okay, so maybe that was a bit weird.
Before I could challenge him with my own list of oddities that I had for him, a throat cleared. I realized Nate was already looking forward, his expression calm and maybe a little smug.
A broad-shouldered middle-aged man stood a few feet before us. His gaze was unwavering and a little intimidating. I assumed he was the security Micky had organized from the suit he wore and the muscle he was packing.
“Mr. Broadwater, I’m Matt Tully from Stronghold Security.”
I nodded and offered a tight smile. “Call me Ryan. And this is Nate.”
Matt dipped his head in acknowledgment. “I’ve got Zoe waiting in the car for us. She’ll be driving us tonight. I spotted two local paps out front. Chancers. Your bags are all loaded. Border control just needs to do a quick check of your passports, then are you ready to go?”
“Yes, thanks.” It was then I realized I still held Nate’s hand. Doing so felt phenomenal, eased some of my uncertainty, and reminded me of one of the reasons I was doing this.
After a woman from border control entered and did the necessary checks, Matt rejoined us. “Let’s get going then.” As we followed him out of the jet, our baseball caps firmly in place, I took a cursory glance at my surroundings.
A scattering of planes of various sizes caught my attention, along with a few people milling around, all focused on whatever their task was. This was ideal. “We should travel this way more often,” I said quietly to Nate, who snorted at my side. I wondered if he remembered our conversation as kids.
Once we were in the SUV, Matt turned in his seat from the front. “There’s news crews and several paps camped outside your condo.”
My stomach dipped.
“Don’t worry. We have guys there. We’ve also made a call to the local PD for crowd control support.”
While Matt’s face held nothing but clear-cut certainty, and I was sure he was used to this sort of thing, my stomach twisted. Nate’s hand on my thigh had me drawing in a breath, reminding me I was not alone in this. Gripping his hand, I forced myself to loosen the tension in my shoulders.
“Ryan.” My attention darted to Matt. “Trust me when I say we’ve got this. We’ll get you home and without a single camera shoved in your face. We’re on your detail for the next week, but more if needed.”
I blanched at that, earning me a reassuring smile from Matt. “Hopefully the buzz will have died down long before that.”
I nodded, knowing other pro athletes had been where I was, and while they’d been big news for a while, they weren’t regularly in the press anymore. I’d always known that. It was just now I had to deal with being one of them. “Thanks. I’m just so not used to any of this.”
Matt studied me for a beat as Zoe said something quietly to him.
He signaled he heard her with a nod before we pulled away.
“You’ve stayed out of the media and have done an impressive job of doing so.
” The wide eyes I shot his way made Matt chuckle, a deep rasping sound.
“We had twenty-four hours to prep before you were due back on American soil.”
The squeezing of my hand caught my attention again. Nate’s warm eyes met mine. “You’ll be able to get that back again,” he said.
Once Matt turned around to face the road, I pressed a kiss to Nate’s temple. He sighed against me and traced his fingers over my chest.
“You doing okay?” I shrugged, not willing to lie to him by saying yes. “Have you still got your phone switched off?”
“Yeah. My phone blowing up was stressing me out.”
“You want to let me have it for a while so I can field any calls? I suppose some people who you need to talk to will be trying to get in touch.”
Thoughtful to a fault, Nate somehow always knew what I needed and what to say. A genuine smile formed on my mouth. “I love you.” I indicated I wanted his lips, and he offered them willingly. The smile I felt pressing against them sent a fresh wave of calm over me.
When I pulled away, I watched as the bright lights from outside danced around on his face. There was honesty, and such love and understanding reflected at me, my heart calmed even further.
“How’d you get to be so brave and awesome?” While my voice was soft, there was no real teasing in my tone.