26 #3
“I was planning to move out,” Jude said without hesitation.
“I’m already nineteen. I should start taking care of myself now.
I may depend on others sometimes, but I can be independent too, you know,” he said as if he really could.
“I need to be strong and learn how to live on my own…because at the end of the day, I only have myself.”
Jude spoke from the heart, and for a moment, Sky was left speechless. He noticed Sky’s jaw tighten as he pressed his lips into a thin line.
A few seconds passed before Sky finally spoke again.
“When are you planning to move out?” he asked.
Jude was not sure why, but for some reason, he wanted to answer honestly.
“I was thinking…today.”
Jude was not sure why he was telling all this to Sky Granger.
“Do you already have a place to stay?” Sky asked, his voice strangely calm and softer than usual.
“Nothing yet, but I can find one,” Jude answered.
Jude had already made up his mind about moving out.
He could not keep living in a place filled with lies.
He could not stay in a house where there was neither peace nor love.
Deep down, he knew he had never truly belonged there.
Despite everything, he remained grateful to them for raising him all those years, even if they had never treated him like their real child, which, in the end, had been the truth all along.
Sky did not say anything after that. He simply watched Jude in silence, his gaze intense and unreadable. For a brief moment, they held each other’s eyes until Jude was the first to look away.
Before the silence could turn more awkward, Jude lowered his head and pretended to be busy by absentmindedly playing with the water around his hands.
Jude could still feel Sky’s gaze on him as he gaited to where the rocky ground was no longer within reach.
Without much thought, Jude closed his eyes and let himself sink beneath the water, submerging completely.
For a brief moment, he felt an overwhelming sense of peace, as though the water had washed away every burden weighing on his heart.
Jude did not try to swim or move his feet.
He simply let himself sink upright, his arms spread wide.
The feeling was almost unreal. It had been so long since he last immersed himself in natural bodies of water. Years had passed since his last visit to a beach, and experiencing something like this now, at a waterfall, no less, one of the places he had always dreamed of seeing, felt indescribable.
As Jude closed his eyes beneath the water, his thoughts drifted back to what had happened the night before. The pain was still there, sharp and persistent. Every time he replayed their conversation in his mind, it sent a heavy ache straight through his chest.
Why is the world so cruel to me?
Why can’t I just have a normal, happy life like most people?
Why does it feel like I’m breathing, but not really living?
Where are my real parents?
Are they still looking for me?
Do they ever wonder where I am now, or think about bringing me back?
Or do they even think of me at all?
Did they abandon me because they saw me as a burden, a plague, like most people think, something to be rid of?
These questions swirled endlessly in Jude’s mind, one after another. Even beneath the water, he could feel tears slipping from his eyes, carried away and hidden by the current. He wished the waterfall could wash away all his pain, because if it could, he would keep coming back here.
Jude was lost in deep thought when he suddenly felt a hand gently brush against his cheek.
Instead of panicking, he allowed it, letting Sky’s touch linger on his face.
With his eyes still closed, he felt a strange surge of electricity run through him.
Not the water’s current but sparks of the unknown.
When he finally opened his eyes, the green with golden flecks he had yearned to see from time to time met his gray ones. They were only inches apart, so close their noses nearly touched. Everything around them seemed to slow, as if time itself had paused in that moment.
Sky’s face was dull, but Jude could see worry and care in them.
This man, right in front of him, was the reason why he was still alive.
He was there when Jude needed someone to lean on.
He was his number one enemy, but he was also the one who saved him.
He was the person he hated most, but he was also the only one he felt truly safe with.
They locked eyes in silence, closer than they had ever been before, their foreheads lightly touching.
But instead of panicking, Jude stayed still, allowing Sky to hold him as they stared at each other up close.
It felt almost unreal to Jude, as if he were hallucinating the beauty of Sky’s eyes.
They had always looked striking from a distance, but seeing those rare, captivating orbs this close made him lose himself in them completely.
Sky’s eyes felt like his safe place. His true home.
Sky gently cupped Jude’s face with both hands, and what happened next was the last thing Jude had expected: Sky leaned in, completely closing the distance between them as he kissed him.