Chapter 45
Shit about to hit the fans.
“What the fuck do you mean she’s mine?” Grey whispered. His expressive eyes glowed amber in the orangish sky. “I thought you had twins.”
We faced each other, sitting on his patio floor silently, while the darkening of the evening slowly drifted over us.
He corrected me tersely, “No, you wanted the baby to be Carter’s.”
I sighed, “I did because he was ready to step up, and you didn’t want children back then, remember?”
“So, the fuck what?” Grey smacked the back of his hand with his palm. “What twenty-one-year-old man wants a baby? You don’t think I would’ve stepped up and taken care of you and my baby when I’ve always been there for you?”
“I know you would’ve. You would’ve given up your dream to be there for me.” I pressed my hand against my heart. “I couldn’t and didn’t want to get in the way of you going to the Olympics.”
“And the only solution is to pass my baby off as St. Patrick’s?” He started rocking. “I have a daughter who doesn’t know me, by a woman who supposedly loved me and would never ever lie to me. So, you didn’t have twins?”
“They are twins. It’s very rare, but two sperm can fertilize two different eggs simultaneously.
You were already gone when I realized I was having twins.
Carter still wanted to be with me, even if the babies were yours.
We had Ethyn first, who looked just like Carter, so we assumed the twins were his.
When Elle came with your eyes five minutes later, we knew she was yours.
I wanted to tell you, even planned to once you’d finished the first Olympics.
Carter bonded and loved Elle from birth, and he asked me to let him be the father, and we decided that we could keep the secret. ”
His brows dipped fiercely. “How could you do that to me? To me? Where’s your fucking loyalty to me? You threw Chelsea out of your life because of Carter, and you did the same to me because of a man who ain’t fucking worth it.” He suddenly stood up and put on his shirt. “Let’s go.”
I scrambled to my feet. “Wait, Grey, what do you mean?”
He yelled, “I want to see my daughter.”
Timidly, I stepped closer to him. “All she knows is Carter. We need to be careful -”
Grey’s eyes blazed, and he pushed past me. “I want to see her. Now.” He stormed into the house, and I rushed after him.
I tried to jump in front of him again. “I can’t let you do that to Elle.”
Grey moved around me and grabbed his keys off the table on his way out the door.
“I’m not fucking around with you. Take me to see my daughter, or I swear the whole fucking world will know you kept my baby from me.
” He pulled out his cell from his back pocket.
“All I have to do is hit this button, and I’m speaking to my IG with over five million followers that Carter St. Patrick of the Los Angeles Rams stole my baby. ”
“Grey, we didn’t steal your baby. Listen, I’d already planned to tell you on Tuesday after I spoke with Carter to let him know that it was time for you to know the truth.”
“Bullshit, or even if that was your plan, the minute he said ‘no,’ your weak ass would have obeyed.” He bit out as he stalked through the door. “Get in the car, now.”
Wringing my hands with worry, I followed behind him and eased into the jeep as he jumped into the other side.
“Can you at least bring me to my car first?” I needed to stall him and get him to change his mind about going to my house and blowing it up.
“Get Carter to take you.” He snarled before he punched the steering wheel.
“She’s a little girl. I missed everything.
Her birth, her taking her first step. The first day of school.
And she thinks St. Patrick is her damn father.
” Grey started the car and peeled off so fast I had to grab the seatbelt.
“I’m so fucking pissed, I can’t think straight. ”
“Please...it’s going to be okay, like you told me about Carter. I want her to know you.” I soothed him, though he didn’t seem to respond to my words.
Grey uttered, “Danielle knew you were pregnant, and she stopped me from seeing you. I wanted to marry you and would’ve been happy to know you were having my baby.
” He slanted a glare at me. “I’ve known you for years, and my fucking feelings didn’t matter.
I didn’t matter.” Angry tears graced his cheeks. “Did I fucking matter to anyone?”
Hearing him say that wounded my soul. When we were teens, he’d once told me that he didn’t matter to his family.
That he was unwanted and was only an obligation because he was never entirely accepted on either side of his family.
My secret took away his sun and brought back his cloud.
Nothing I would say about why we kept Elle from him would be received, so I hugged the door, stared out the window, and gave him my address.
I had forty minutes to make him understand that telling Elle what he seemed intent on doing could permanently damage any chance of a relationship between them.
“I never thought leaving you would make you think of me so horribly.” He entered the highway, speeding. “You really believed you would never see me again. Wow.”
“Grey...please. Slow down.” How could he possibly understand that he would always be my weakness, and I stayed away for my own sanity and the sake of my marriage?
He scoffed and accelerated. “Were you ever going to tell me?”
I silently prayed that we would survive the drive or not be pulled over by the police.
“You have to believe that secret stained me and our marriage. I’ve never been truly happy because you didn’t know.
I was young and trying to hold on to the man there with me, who promised not to leave me.
I didn’t know where your head would be.”
“All of this is because I chose to go to the Olympics and couldn’t tell you I wanted marriage and family, and St. Patrick did?
” He started laughing sarcastically. “This is all so fucking hilarious. That son of a bitch played you back then and still playing you. He pretended to be this savior...the man of your dreams. Giving you hope that he can love you and only you. I have to give him credit for being smarter than me. I tried to be honest with you. All he ever did was lie, and he got you and a family that he has no intention of breaking up. I heard him over the phone. He’s trying to find the right explanation so he doesn’t lose you.
And you want to believe in him so bad, you’ll believe whatever bullshit story he’ll tell you.
When the bottom line is that he never stopped fucking Chelsea, and that’s probably his son.
He probably has a house in Texas for his other family.
Like any selfish bastard, he wants to keep and eat the cake too. ”
I shut my eyes tight at the accusations and the daggers he hurled at me.
He was full of pain, and he needed to unleash it.
My gut told me that what he said about Carter and Chelsea was true, or at least had some truth.
Maybe that’s why I didn’t want to read her letter.
I knew something in it would change how I felt about Carter, and I didn’t want to lose him, too.
I saw a future in him, and he saw one in me.
Whatever his motivations, he chose me as his wife and the mother of his children.
Our foundation may have been unstable, but we built a house and a family irrefutably.
Our children were happy, and I believed we were for a while, too.
Or maybe a better word would be that Carter and I shared a purpose and passion for each other.
We wanted to be together because we believed our family was stronger and more than our marital union.
Grey believed that no matter what Carter said, I would forgive Carter.
That was not my belief. These last few months punched through the fabric of our lives, and I could no longer turn a blind eye to the rips in my marriage or myself.
I could no longer see our marriage and family through an impaired lens.
When Grey exited the highway and finally stopped at a traffic light, I jumped out and hurried across the busy street to the sidewalk.
I heard him curse and horns blaring as he skidded, probably looking for a place to park.
I wasn’t running from him. I just wanted him to hear me.
I couldn’t, and I wouldn’t let him hurt my baby.
..his baby. I walked past a closed boutique and leaned against the wall between the storefront windows.
Soon, Grey half-jogged my way, and I waved my hand to stop him.
He glared at me, ready to tear into me again, and I held up a video of Elle running in our backyard.
“She is yours, and I will never ever keep her from you again. Elle Star is a seven-year-old who’s so freaking bright and brilliant.
” I choked over my words. “I love her so much because I see you in her every single day. She is my joy, and I can’t let you dull that light that shines through.
I don’t care if you don't forgive me as long as you allow me to make this transition easier. She will be confused, scared, and hurt because Carter has been an awesome father to her, despite what you feel about him. Just like I know you will be, too. She loves Carter just like I know she will love you in time, too.”
Transfixed by the video, Grey melted at the sight of his daughter, running with grit and determination just like him, and he took the cell from my hands to replay the video.
“If we go to my house now, what do you think will happen? Huh? Carter is there. He’s scared to death of losing Elle, and me too, since he decided to come home tonight.
He’s going to defend his home and his family.
Do you really want your daughter’s impression of you to be angry and violent?
” I gave a short chuckle. “Because if you force me to take you to my house tonight, you and Carter might kill each other. You and I both know I’m not exaggerating. ”
He grabbed my upper arm roughly. “You kept her from me all these years, and I’m supposed to go home and wait for you to get back to me?
How do I know you won’t try to run with her or lawyer up?
He has more money than me, and you’re her mother.
You can keep shit like this tied up so long in the court that I miss out on more precious time. ”
I pressed my hands against his still-heaving chest. “Let me deal with Carter tonight. My mother is in town, so I’ll get her to keep Ethyn.
I’ll bring Elle to meet you after school or later tomorrow evening.
I won’t tell her you’re her father yet. But I do want you to meet.
” I inhaled and exhaled before I began again.
“She wants to run like you, and I can introduce you as my old Olympic track star friend.”
Grey’s eyes watered before he averted his gaze. He released me, pushed my phone back in my hands, and commanded quietly, “Come on.”
I followed behind him, uncertain if he had really heard me.
“If you don’t believe me, I can text you that you’re her father, and you’ll have proof from me.
You can blast it to the world if I don’t keep my word.
And if that isn’t enough...believe that your best friend will never lie to you again.
Believe that I never stopped loving you, and I look forward to the day our daughter knows you as her father. ”
“I’m taking you to your car.” He walked ahead of me, and though he didn’t wait for me to get in, he opened my door before going to the driver’s side.
I slid back in, grateful that I had temporarily put out one fire. Unfortunately, I still had to deal with the dragon waiting for me at home.