Chapter 12 Dove #2
Her last few words echoed louder than she probably meant, and a few heads turned.
She ducked her head. I took a breath, trying not to let my own frustration rise with hers.
The last thing I wanted was for her attitude to bleed into mine.
It was obvious she was spiraling, and had been, long before she ever stepped into Margaret’s shop that day.
And as if Margaret were standing right beside me, I heard her voice, clear as day.
“When someone is cracked wide open, Dovey, we don’t run for the Band-Aids or look for ways to put them back together.
Sometimes, you have to let them sit in the wreckage of their own mind.
Sometimes, you just have to let people bleed out so they can heal themselves.
We’re not here to heal, kiddo. We’re here to guide. ”
I swallowed.
Ellis shook her head, her expression aghast, like she knew she’d revealed too much of the inner workings of her mind and was now scrambling to shove those secrets back inside. To return to the carefully curated version of herself she showed the world.
But it was too late.
I’d seen some of the ugly.
And I knew there was more.
I wanted to see it.
I wanted to help her.
“I’m going to the car,” she said suddenly, pulling her sunglasses over her eyes. “Come whenever you guys are ready.”
I watched as she turned on her heel and practically marched out of the museum, head held high with that air of aloofness I knew was all bullshit bravado.
“She’s more messed up than I am.”
Liv’s voice appeared beside me, and I jumped slightly, clutching my chest.
“Jesus, Liv.”
She shrugged and looked after Ellis. “She is messed up, though. She doesn’t know how to carry it, you know, the guilt. She thinks my death was manifested. She’s had that sitting on her chest since she woke up with my heart inside her. Now she holds the guilt like a shield.”
“Well,” I said lightly, my nerves a little frayed, “maybe if you went a little easier on her—”
“No way,” Liv cut in sharply. “No. People have been going easy on her her whole life. Now she’s a sulking, ungrateful idiot who doesn’t need coddling, she needs a kick up the ass.
This trip isn’t just for me, Dove. Wake up.
We need to show Ellis there’s more to life, and she needs to live it.
She needs to understand that we all have an expiration date. So no, I won’t go easy on her.”
Liv stormed off before I could say anything, and I rubbed my face, trailing after her.
The silence in the car as we drove to Red Oak II had already grown louder than Liv’s personality, and we were only twenty minutes into the drive.
G Flip was bashing the drums in the background.
Ellis had set the volume, and I wasn’t about to alter it, but if we were going to sit in silence, couldn’t she at least make it a little louder?
I decided then, as Ellis leaned her head into her hand, driving one-handed with a set look on her face, that she might not want to know Liv, and that was her choice.
But it wasn’t mine.
I was doing myself a disservice by hauling Liv’s ghostly ass across state lines and knowing absolutely nothing about her.
“Liv,” I began, twisting in my seat to face her, sliding one leg underneath me.
“Dove,” Liv mimicked, a grin spreading across her face.
“We’ve been on the road for, like, what… four days now?”
“Four and a half,” she corrected, her eyes still dancing. “Having fun?”
“Loads,” I said, and it was a mostly honest answer. It was kind of nice to be away from home, the shop, my family. It made the loss of Margaret sting a little less, not being surrounded by so many things that reminded me of her.
“Ellis doesn’t seem too thrilled,” Liv commented, nodding toward her.
I shrugged, refusing to acknowledge the bait, and trying not to notice the thinner press of Ellis’s lips as she tightened her grip on the wheel.
“Well, I don’t know that much about you,” I continued. “All I know is you’re a ghost, you clearly love sequins,” I gestured to her outfit, still trying to understand why it was the one she died in. “And that you planned an epic road trip with your best friend.”
“That’s a lot of things to know, actually,” Liv said with a smirk.
“I mean more things, though,” I pressed. “Like, what was your favorite movie? Or your favorite food? What did you want to be when you grew up? That kind of stuff.”
“Okay,” Liv murmured, nodding with a grin. “I’ll play, but question for a question.”
“Done,” I said with a shrug. “Favorite movie?”
“Clueless,” Liv said, as if it were a no-brainer. “Obviously. You?”
“Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind,” I answered instantly. “I don’t know why. It’s weird as hell and makes me feel like I can’t breathe while I watch it, but I love it.”
Ellis said nothing, and I left her be.
“What were you going to do as a career, or any sort of job?” I asked.
“It was a toss-up,” Liv said, tucking her legs beneath her. “I either wanted to be a singer or I wanted to open a bar–slash–tattoo parlor–slash–bookstore.”
I blinked at her. “They couldn’t be further apart on the career scale.”
“I know,” Liv said with a dramatic sigh. “I’m either one or the other. But how cool would the bar–tattoo–bookstore be? You could walk in, get a drink, get a tattoo, and leave with a copy of The Bell Jar.”
“I would go there,” I said honestly. “Sounds awesome.”
“Did you always plan to work at your shop?” Liv asked, her expression genuinely curious as she leaned back into the seat.
I nodded. “Yep. From the moment I started hanging out there with Margaret, I knew that’s where I’d end up. I love it there. It’s home. I’m content building on it, making sure it doesn’t sink.”
Ellis suddenly began to slow the car, and I frowned as she pulled over to the side of the road. Liv’s eyes widened, and she beamed, clapping her hands.
“Photo op time!” she announced, eyes twinkling. “Welcome to Gary’s Gay Parita, the old Sinclair gas station!”
We all got out of the car, dust settling from the Mustang’s tires as it rolled to a stop.
The first thing that caught my eye was a bright green Sinclair dinosaur sitting out front like it owned the place.
I squinted at its round, plastic eyes, which caught the light in a way that could be either endearing or demonic, depending on the angle.
A rusty red truck sat behind another weathered vehicle, flowers growing out of its bed, recycled into probably the best planter I’d ever seen. The girl who owned the overpriced plant shop next to Margaret’s store could take notes. Just saying.
“This is cool,” I declared, turning in a slow half circle to take it all in.
Liv was attempting to mount the dinosaur, looking ridiculous in her boots and skirt as she did so. Birds chirped lazily, and gravel crunched beneath our feet. Ellis strolled around with her phone out, filming or taking photos. Her expression remained grim, and she didn’t say a word.
I made my way inside.
The gas station was amazing—part museum, part collector’s treasure chest—and I found myself standing in front of a rack of postcards.
I smirked at the sight of one with a red Mustang on it and added it to my collection, along with some magnets and a key ring.
I glanced up as Ellis entered the store, her eyes widening slightly as she took it all in.
“You girls on the Route?”
I looked over to see a man coming out from the back of a storeroom. He looked to be in his seventies, wearing a blue cap and a pair of overalls that appeared older than the gas station itself. He leaned against the counter and gave us both a nod, smiling beneath his white mustache.
“We are,” I said with a smile, heading over to pay for my items.
“You gotta do it at least once in your life,” he said, ringing me up.
I handed over the cash and received a brown paper bag.
“Are you ladies going to see a movie at the Route 66 Drive-In?” he asked, handing me a flyer. “It’s horror night tonight, and the last weekend before they shut for the season. It’s an experience.”
“Oh!” Liv said with a gleeful sound that, thankfully, the attendant couldn’t hear. “That sounds so cool!”
“No, we won’t be,” Ellis said politely. “It’s not on our itinerary.”
“What?” Liv snapped. “You better add it.”
“We’re headed to Red Oak II, and then we’re on to Tulsa,” Ellis added, placing a few of her own items on the counter—a colorful bracelet, a key ring, and a postcard.
“Ah,” the man said with a sigh. “You can’t miss the Drive-In. Whatever you do, don’t skip it. Add some time for it, you won’t be disappointed. That’s some real history right there.”
He rang up Ellis’s items, and she gave him a polite smile. “We’ll think about it,” she said.
Outside, the sun was high in the sky, and the green dinosaur cast a long shadow across the white gravel. Ellis began fishing through her bag, pulling out the Polaroid camera with an irritated expression.
“You ladies need help with a photo?” the man asked, having followed us out. “You could get one in front of the dinosaur there. It’s quite popular.”
“Sure,” I said before Ellis could open her mouth. “Thank you.”
Ellis sighed softly and handed the man her camera as he approached.
“Oh wow,” he said before she could speak. “I haven’t seen one of these in years, and in such good nick, too.”
Ellis blinked at him. “Yeah. It was my grandmother’s.”
“Just another piece of history,” he said with a grin. “Okay, stand together in front of the dinosaur.”
Liv stood behind us on the dinosaur’s back, posing as if the camera would pick her up.
Click.
Ellis rushed over as the Polaroid slowly began to spit out the photo and, once more, immediately tucked it away with all the others she’d been storing in her bag.
“Okay, we have to go,” Ellis said. “We’re behind. Thank you again, sir, for the photo. You have a cool store.”
“Safe travels, ladies,” he said with a wave.