Chapter 9
Iseemed to have fallen for the human female. She was perfect. A complete and utter delight in fact, and that was without me even spending time with her awake! Zara left a mess everywhere. I had been able to spend hours while she slept like the dead, cleaning and tidying after I’d let myself in. She’d even left out some milk for me, an invitation and a thank you in anticipation for my help. How had she known to do that? We had to be fated mates. Had to be. Now all I needed to do was call Max and ask to be set up on a date with her. It couldn’t wait until Monday. If he refused, then I’d just have to take matters into my own hands. Right now, for once, I felt a deep sense of peace. I’d been able to tidy and clean for hours without being arrested. Go me!
Before I could call the agency though, Chester called me, saying he had time to show me around the council offices and explain a few things, so I quickly got ready and went off to meet him.
It turned out there was a lot more to running the dell than I’d envisaged. However, I found it all interesting and got quite excited about the new filing systems I’d be able to put in place. A nice, tidy office, where I could easily put my hand to things. Not that it was a mess now. It was just I knew I could do it better.
By the time I got back home, I had a text message asking me to phone Max. How fortuitous! I called him straight back.
“Ah, Boone, thanks for calling. I know I said I couldn’t see you until Monday, but I’ve been talking to Shelley, and she’s matched you with a human female, just like you apparently suggested. This woman had a particularly bad date last night and mentioned she’d bumped into you on her way out of the building yesterday…”
It was her! My stomach licked with the flames of anticipation. Zara had mentioned me?
Max continued. “Shelley went through the algorithm, and you matched well as a potential couple, so how are you fixed to go on a date with her tomorrow evening? She’s working tonight,” he added.
I knew from Zara’s abandoned uniform I’d tidied up that she worked at Red’s Steakhouse. That also meant she’d be out tonight if I wanted to check out her home again. I’d be able to look upstairs. Maybe even tidy it. I was so exuberant I felt like dancing around.
“I’d be delighted to attend a date with her,” I told Max.
“Excellent. Her name is Zara Bell. Shelley and I will organise the where and what time and I’ll get back to you,” he said.
“Thank you. I shall look forward to it,” I said with complete honesty. After ending the call, I contacted Marin to ask her advice about improving the look of my accommodation.
“Don’t you feel you’re jumping the gun a little, Boone? You’ve not even had a date with her yet.”
“I have a feeling that she’s my intended. I just can’t explain it. She’s so delightfully messy,” I said with exuberance.
“You’ve been to her house once, Boone. Maybe she was just having a bad day or a bad month. She might not be happy you tidied up. You need to do some more research. You say she’s working tonight? Wear a different disguise and go have a meal there. Spend some time in her company where you can secretly assess her personality more.”
“You’re right. I will do exactly that tonight,” I said. It was going to be a long day until then as I was feeling like a kid at Christmas who’d woken up three times already in the early hours and was about to be screamed at by their mother.
* * *
I’d made a reservation for eight pm and glamoured my appearance so that I looked like a fifty-year-old guy with a bit of salt and pepper in their hair and the beginnings of middle-aged spread.
When I arrived, a guy met me at the entrance.
“Welcome to Red’s. I’m Raymond. Do you have a reservation?”
I looked past him, but there was no sign of Zara. Had she changed her shift? Was she not here tonight after all? I felt a heavy weight in my stomach until the woman herself came out of a door at the back carrying two plates of food.
“She looks so good,” I said, earning myself a pointed stare from the guy.
“Pardon?”
“The steak. It looks so good.”
“You said she,” he elaborated, his tone cold.
“It’s a weird habit I possess. I call food she,” I rambled on.
“Do you have a reservation? Because otherwise, I’m afraid we’re booked up.” This sentence was followed by a smile that did not reach Raymond’s eyes. Oh dear, at this rate I might not get past the doorway. Thank goodness for online booking systems.
I stared at all the empty seats, hopefully to imply I saw through Raymond’s bullshit. “Yes, I’m booked in under Emilio Darcy.”
“Oh, okay. Well, I’ll be your server this evening. Let me show you to your seat and then I’ll get you a menu,” he said, taking me to a seat in the far corner behind a partition wall. Basically where no one could see me, and I could see no one else. Where such a booth was usually reserved for groups wanting more privacy, I’d clearly been put here because I merited some concern. At least this guy was looking out for my potential girlfriend’s safety.
“Can I get you a drink?” Raymond asked.
“I’d love some milk please,” I said.
“Milk. Just a glass of normal milk, or a milkshake?”
“Just milk, thanks.”
He wandered off. I lifted up off my seat so I could watch him leave and look for Zara. What I saw was him talking to her, before pointing in my direction, and whirling his finger around in a circle near his temple. I could have sworn her eyes caught mine but decided against it. There was a collection of fake plants atop the partition, enough that I could disguise myself while peeking.
I decided to ask for the loo so that I could engage Zara in conversation. Standing, I dashed over to her.
“Where’s the bathroom?” I asked, realising that with my speed I must look like I was about to pee myself at the very least.
“Just behind where you were sitting,” she said, pointing back the way I came.
“Oh, okay, thanks,” I said, taking care to walk slowly back in that direction before pushing open the door and going inside. I took the opportunity to have a pee while I was there, and also to smack myself in the forehead.
“Get a grip,” I scolded. “Just go outside and eat and stop making a fool of yourself.”
When I walked back outside, my glass of milk had been delivered. Raymond came over once he noticed I was back in my seat.
“Are you ready to order?”
“Yes. Could I take a medium-rare sirloin with fries please, and a side of coleslaw.”
He noted my order and then paused before speaking. “Look, I keep seeing you staring at our female server. Just to say that she’s not interested. She’s here to work.”
“Oh gosh, no. I’m old enough to be her father,” I said, remembering my disguise. “Just here to enjoy a steak, honestly. Sorry if I’ve made a weird first impression. I’m quite socially awkward.”
“Ahh,” Raymond said, satisfied with my response. “I understand that. Was a bit like that myself until I began working here a few years ago. Then you get used to talking and being around lots of people. You’ve been very brave then, coming out alone.”
“A guy’s gotta eat, right? I’ve heard good things about this place.”
“Listen, do you want me to move you somewhere more public? This seats a bit cut off from everyone.” Raymond clearly now had guilt for his prior actions.
“No, it’s fine. Probably a good first step. Then if I get the courage to come out again sometime in the future, I can sit somewhere a little busier.”
“Okay. Let me get this order in. Enjoy your milk.”
A few minutes later, I was extremely surprised when Zara appeared, bringing a bowl of chicken wings. “Hey there, Ray said to tell you these are on the house.”
“Oh, wow. Tell him thank you,” I said. “You having a good shift?”
She shrugged her shoulders. “It’s okay.”
“Better than being in the house alone, right?” I said.
“How’d you know I live alone?” she queried; her words dragged out with suspicion.
“Gosh, I don’t. I was talking about myself,” I clarified quickly. “I live alone. I mean I’m sure that’s quite obvious with what an idiot I’m being this evening.”
“You sound like you’re being very hard on yourself. Why don’t you enjoy your meal and try to relax? Are you meeting a date here and you’re nervous?”
“Gosh, no. No date. I’m much too awkward to have a date at the moment.”
She stared at me for a minute. “Have you ever been to Withernsea Dating?”
My mouth fell open. Had my glamour changed to the one I’d had in the dating agency? I felt at my face, at my hair.
“D-do you recognise me?” I stuttered out.
“Oh, golly, no. It’s okay. If you’ve been there, your secret is safe with me. I just thought you seemed so anxious and Shelley, the owner there, is really very good at matching you up with a date. But, if you’ve been there before, please excuse my personal intrusion.”
This evening just kept getting worse. My hopes to enjoy a meal and just nosy at Zara from afar had turned into me appearing like a loveless, highly anxious bachelor.
Then Raymond appeared, placing my meal on the table.
“Here she is. Doesn’t she look glorious?” he said.
“Erm, yes, Zara looks absolutely magnificent,” I agreed.
“I meant the steak. You call them all female, right?” Raymond said. Meanwhile, Zara had gone scarlet in the cheeks.
“Excuse me. I must get back to my section,” she stated, scurrying off.
Raymond folded his arms across his body. “So you were ogling our waitress. She’s not interested, buddy. Enjoy your meal and then I recommend you don’t come here again. Okay?”
I nodded very enthusiastically. I certainly wouldn’t be doing this again. And tonight, I wouldn’t go to Zara’s house either. No, I would wait now until I’d got my proper date with her and try a less stalker-ish approach.
After enjoying my meal and paying the bill, I exited the restaurant and began the walk back to my home. I passed Hanif’s, the Indian restaurant, where I noted an ambulance was parked outside. I hoped whoever it was there for was okay and no one had been injured in the kitchen.
Maybe someone’s date has gone worse than mine, I thought, the idea of returning home and relaxing right now feeling even more enticing. I hurried away before the ambulance staff appeared and I was accused of staring inappropriately once again.