Chapter 25
Isaac
Tip #25: An empty desk doesn’t just symbolize their absence—it’s a glaring reminder of the space they filled in your life and the void they’ve left behind.
I stared at my reflection in the blank computer screen, hardly recognizing the haggard face staring back at me. Dark circles ringed my bloodshot eyes, and my usually meticulously styled hair was messy and unruly. I hadn’t slept well in days, not since Charlotte and I….
“Today’s the first day of work without Charlotte,” I muttered to my empty office, my voice scratchy from disuse.
The words hung in the air and my chest ached, a physical pain that radiated through my body. I slumped in my chair, contemplating the empty hole my life had become.
A knock broke the silence, followed by the creak of the door. Logan poked his head in, his dark eyes studying me.
“Do you need something, Logan?” I straightened up and tried to look less like death warmed over.
Logan hesitated, then slipped inside, carefully closing the door behind him. “I wanted to check on you, because….” He trailed off, his gaze still fixed on me.
“Because it’s my first day without Charlotte?” I dryly supplied.
He nodded, his expression softening with concern.
“It’s fine.” I drummed my fingers on the desk. “Everything’s fine. And even if it’s not, it’s my fault.”
Logan’s brow furrowed, his usual stoic mask cracking to reveal genuine worry. He walked up to my desk, glancing at my computer screen before doing a comical double take.
“Your computer isn’t even on,” he said, his voice deep and gravelly. He checked his wristwatch, then pulled out his cell phone, squinting at both in confusion.
“Your watch isn’t wrong,” I informed him. “It’s exactly 9:02 a.m.”
Logan’s eyes narrowed. “You’re not working already?”
I shrugged. “What can I say? I’m branching out, trying this new thing called being unproductive.”
Logan’s eyebrows shot up, clearly not buying my attempt at humor.
“I only know it’s 9:02 because I just checked Charlotte’s flight status,” I admitted, the words tumbling out before I could stop them.
Logan blinked. “How do you know her flight status?”
I sighed, running a hand through my hair. “She gave me her flight information to pass along to that tour guide I recommended. You know, back when we were…” I trailed off, unable to finish the sentence.
Logan’s gaze bore into me, judgment radiating off him in waves. I could practically hear his thoughts: “You’re tracking her flight? Really, Isaac?”
“Is it stalker-y of me to be tracking her flight like this?” I asked rhetorically. “Yes. Do I care? No.”
Logan’s lips pressed into a thin line. “Do you need to be hospitalized?”
I scoffed, though it came out more like a pathetic chuckle. “I’m fine. Wretched and miserable, sure, but not sick.”
Logan’s expression remained unconvinced. His dark eyes scanned my face, probably taking in the bags under my eyes and the stubble I’d neglected to shave.
Recognizing that if I didn’t do something to assuage Logan’s concern he might drag me out of the office, I finally turned on my computer, the soft whir of the machine filling the awkward silence.
When I glanced up, Logan was staring at Charlotte’s empty desk, his stoic face softening. “I’ll miss her too.”
I stared dully at him.
When Logan turned back to me, his eyes were filled with a rare display of emotion. “I’m sorry, Isaac.”
I nodded, not trusting myself to speak.
Logan stepped around my desk, his large hand landing on my shoulder with a comforting pat.
“Thanks,” I said.
Logan nodded at me, then slowly headed for the door. When he opened my office door he paused and looked back at me. “I’ll be back to check on you. Throughout the day.”
“Thank you, but that’s not necessary,” I wryly said.
Logan left without responding, purposely leaving the door wide open.
“Logan!” I called after him. “Close the door!”
When he didn’t return, I pushed myself up from my chair, muttering under my breath about meddling cousins. I stalked to the door, ready to shut out the world, when I happened to glance out into the team office space.
The room was bustling with activity. One of the new employees sat at Charlotte’s old desk, looking far too comfortable considering how recent the arrangement was. Ravi’s cheerful voice carried across the room as he chatted on the phone. Arisa was talking to Lola, her voice low but impassioned as she explained that Warner Print needed to find an alternate way to feed the squirrels because apparently two raccoons had raided the new squirrel feeders….
I tried to process the scene. How could they all look sonormal? So cheerful? Didn’t they feel the gaping void Charlotte had left behind?
My chest tightened, a sharp pain lancing through me, and I braced myself on the doorframe.
I watched the team for a few moments longer, their laughter and chatter stark contrasts to the heavy silence in my office.
I knew they missed her, so why weren’t they upset?
Granted, my love for Charlotte was different than their friendship with her, but… it was Charlotte . The office revolved around her.
At least, it had for me.
Grimacing, I closed the door, shutting out the sounds of normalcy that felt like a betrayal to my aching heart. As I stalked back to my desk, it occurred to me that I’d severely underestimated the depth of my feelings for her.
My fingers itched to check her flight status again, so I pulled out my phone and opened the necessary app.
A moment passed before I saw her flight had been delayed by almost two hours.
A part of me was relieved—it meant she was still here, in Wisconsin. But another part, the rational part I usually prided myself on, knew this was just prolonging the inevitable.
Charlotte wasn’t leaving; she was gone. Gone from work, gone from my life. It was my choices that had driven that decision.
So, as I’d told Logan, I really did only have myself to blame for this deep and haunting misery.