CHAPTER 19
WIDE OPEN
Marcus had never been to my ‘hood at night. And that matters more than people might think. In Philly, the same street is two different worlds depending on the time of day. In the afternoon, kids rode bikes and old men argued about sports from folding chairs.
You could almost pretend the city wasn’t as hard as it was.
But the night belonged to the block. And Marcus was about to meet it.
He offered to walk me home after practice.
Basketball season had started, and he was riding that passive confidence that came with being one of the best players in the school.
Shoulders broader now, his voice deeper, but he had the same calm energy that made people trust him.
We was sitting on the gym bleachers after everyone else had left.
“The streetlights are about to come on, no way I’m letting you walk home alone.” He grabbed his bag and slung it over one shoulder.
“Give me a second.”
“You know you really don't have to do dat.” I said, crossing my arms.
“Trust me, I want to." A quiet, confident grin hit his face.
Our fingers stayed locked as we moved down the block, entirely caught up in that small world we had built for ourselves.
Each step toward my porch started chipping away at the mood, forcing me back into the real world.
The twins was outside. Sinceer on the steps, glasses sliding down his nose while he scribbled in his notebook.
Saiyd in the street, dribbling a basketball hard against the cracked pavement. When they saw me, he shouted.
“Summer!”
He noticed Marcus, eyes narrowing slightly. In the streets you learn to size people up immediately. It’s one of the first rules of survival.
“Who is dat?”
“Relax,” I told him.
“This Marcus.”
He bounced the ball once more, still studying him.
“You hoop?”
Marcus answered.
“Yeah.”
Sai tossed the basketball at him without warning.
“Lemme see what you got den.”
Marcus caught it easily. Spun it a few times and passed it back. Saiyd grinned. Sinceer looked up briefly.
“Hello.”
Marcus smiled.
“Hey, what’s up.”
Sin head bobbed once and went back to his notebook.
Marcus glanced past the twins toward the end of the block. Four men stood near the light pole. They wasn’t doing anything obvious. Just watching. The way corner boy always watched. Like security cameras with opinions. Marcus leaned slightly toward me.
“Are they looking at me?” he questioned me.
“Dey look at everybody, don’t trip.”
“They look at everybody like that?”
Outsiders stood out around here, and Marcus definitely was an outsider. Saiyd peeped it too.
“Yo,” he whispered to me.
“Dat’s Nico’s boys.”
Of course, it was. Nico had the hood on lock for a minute now, ever since Juan fell off and left the top spot open.
“Do you know them?” Marcus questioned?
“Nah, not really,” I mumbled carefully.
“Well, that’s good, they look pretty dangerous.” Marcus replied.
The tallest one started walking toward us. Big neck, even bigger head. Sneakers scraping the pavement measured, deliberate. A walk meant to make people nervous. He paused at the bottom of the steps and eyed Marcus up and down.
“Yo’ who you?”
Marcus remained calm.
“I’m Marcus.”
“You from ‘round here?”
“No.”
“Mmmm… Yeah… Dat’s what I thought.” His eyes shifted toward me.
“You bringin preppy boys aroun’ now, lil Summa?”
My jaw tightened.
“Mind yo’ business Ant.”
He laughed. Not like it was funny. Like a threat.
“Relax. Ain’t nobody doin’ nun. I’m jus’ tryna welcome ya boy to tha neighbahood.”
His eyes returned to Marcus. Marcus didn’t say anything. Didn’t flinch. Didn’t puff his chest either. He nodded once. Ant stared at him another second and strutted back to the corner.
Saiyd exhaled.
“Yo’ dat was heavy.”
Marcus looked at Sai,
“Who was that guy?”
“One of Nico’s runnas.” Saiyd explained.
“What does that mean?”
I answered quietly.
“It means tha block jus’ met you.”
Marcus moved his head slowly. Completely clueless.
“Yeah… got it.”
The tension faded after a few minutes. Music picked back up. Cars rolled by. Normal block noise. Marcus leaned against the railing beside me.
“Do you deal with this kind of stuff every day?”
“Pretty much.”
He shook his head slightly.
Saiyd started dribbling again, trying to impress Marcus now. Sinceer kept writing. Every few seconds he glanced toward the corner. Watching. Learning. Marcus noticed.
“That one,” he spoke gently, motioning toward Sinceer.
“He’s going somewhere.”
“I know.”
“And the other one?” he questioned me.
We both watched Saiyd. His dribble echoed loud down the block.
“He still deciding.”
Marcus didn’t reply, but the concern in his eyes told me he understood.
“Well, I should head home. It’s getting pretty late.”
“Okay, are you good?”
“Of course.”
He looked down the block one more time and back at me.
“Your world is just different than mine, Summer.”
“I know.”
“But that doesn’t mean you stuck here forever.” He moved in closer. Grabbed my hand briefly.
“I’m getting you out of this place.”
Not a statement. A promise.
When Marcus disappeared down the street, Saiyd spoke again.
“Man, dat dude is soft as cotton.”
Sinceer shook his head.
“No, he’s not.”
Saiyd frowned.
“Den what is he? A fruit cake?”
Sinceer glared toward the corner again, and back at the empty street Marcus had walked down.
“He’s smart.”
That night, lying in bed, my thoughts was racing. Marcus had seen the block now. The real block. And he didn’t run. But from the way the corner watched him leave, I prayed this was the last time those two worlds would ever collide.
PROGRESS
I made it through my first year of high school.
But when I walked through the front door of the house, there was always more work waiting.
The twins needed to be fed. Needed somebody to tell them when to sit down, when to calm down, when to listen.
Mama was trying, working, holding herself together in ways I could see now.
And things did gradually change. Mama started going to AA meetings.
At first, it was strange, her getting dressed to go to a place that wasn’t work.
One time, she took me with her. I remember sitting in that meeting room, it smelled of coffee that had been out too long, old paper, and cigarettes.
Metal chairs scraped against the floor as people settled in, forming that loose circle that meant everybody was equal in there.
No front. No back. Just people and their stories sitting out in the open.
I sat next to Mama. Close enough to feel her shift when she got nervous.
Her hands stayed folded in her lap, fingers moving, like she was trying to hold her spirit in place.
A tall, thin man walked in. Mr. Charles.
You could tell people respected him before he said anything.
“Good evenin’, everybody,” he started, voice low but full.
The room quieted without him asking. He took his seat like he done it a thousand times, because he had.
“Let’s get started.”
The meeting moved the way it was supposed to, I guess. People speaking one by one.
“My name is—”
“I’ve been sober—”
Time felt slower in there. Real. No pretending. I saw Mama listening. Really listening. Taking it in, like she needed it. She wanted something different for herself. For us. She wasn’t fixed, not all the way. But she was trying. And that mattered.
I watched her when it was her turn. She hesitated before she spoke.
“Ummm… my name is Denise,” she said, voice soft.
“And I’m… uhh, workin’ on it.”
A few people nodded.
“Dat’s right,” a lady said.
After the meeting, people lingered. Talking in whispers. Mama stood up slow,
“Come here,” she said, touching my arm.
“I want you to meet someone.”
She led me over towards the table that had cookies and coffee.
“Mr. Charles, this my daughter Summer.”
He looked at me,
“Hello, very nice to meet you, Summer,” he said, offering his hand. His grip was firm, but gentle.
“Nice to meet you too.”
“Your mother talks about you a lot, said you are the fire keeping her lit.” he added, glancing at Mama.
She giggled soft, almost shy. I had never seen that side of her before. Not with nobody but Daddy. She touched her hair without thinking, smiling in a way that didn’t carry stress behind it.
He went on bragging about Mama. Complimenting her recovery.
“Oh, stop,” she said cheesing.
She liked it. I could tell. They stood there talking. Not about heavy things, not about pain, just… talking. Easy. Like they had space to breathe in each other’s presence. Mr. Charles leaned against the table slightly, more relaxed.
“Ya’ know Summer, I’ve got two girls myself,” he said.
“They older than you are though.”
“Oh really? That’s nice.”
He smiled.
“Yeah. And they still keep me on my toes. My oldest just graduated college. That’s why I’m broke.”
Mama laughed. A real laugh. She was so light. So open.
“I have been sober thirteen years,” he said, not bragging, just stating.
I could tell that mattered to him in a quiet way. I could feel it in how he stood. How he spoke. How people listened when he talked. He wasn’t only leading the meetings, he was proof. That it could be done. Mama looked at him like she saw that too. And that mattered.
I stood there, watching them. Watching her.
Thinking… she deserves this. After everything.
After all the nights that didn’t end right, all the days that was too heavy.
She deserved to smile that big. And if Mr. Charles could give her even a little bit of peace, then I was okay with it, more than okay.
For once, the constant pressure eased up, and a genuine shift in our luck seemed possible.
Shay was still gone. Not missing. We knew where she was. But gone from us. Drifting in and out when she felt like it. Sometimes a call. Sometimes a rumor somebody heard from somebody else. But never steady. Never home. I stopped asking as much.
The block teaches you that too; some people come back, but not the way you want them to.
A WHOLE NEW WORLD
I kept my relationship with Marcus to myself.
Mia wouldn’t understand, not really. She wouldn’t understand the kind of love he gave me.
She was used to a different type of man.
The hustlers, the dope boys, the kind the block celebrates.
And Marcus was nothing like that. He was soft where the world was hard, calm where everything else felt loud.